Forever

by Mary Wasowski

  Dinner arrives shortly after our talk, and I honestly enjoy the food that Elizabeth has ordered for us. I can’t remember the last time I really ate. I’ve lost some weight, and it’s been way too long since I went a few rounds with my trainer. My ribs are killing me right now, so I don’t think I could fully work out, but maybe a swim in the morning before the long drive out of the city.

  I had taken something for my sore ribs and I was beginning to feel sleepy. But as much as I fought off Elizabeth’s advances, I didn’t want to be alone. She’s the first woman that’s been in my apartment since Reese, and she is just so familiar to me. God! I hate to even be fantasizing about Elizabeth, but she is too fucking beautiful. Her ass is perfectly round in her jeans. As she bends over, I can see her perfect shaped breasts protruding from her opened blouse. My dick is pressing against my jeans, and it’s been so long since I’ve had sex. I can’t do this to her, it’s not right. I have to just excuse myself and take a cold shower.

  I barely can find my voice when I call out to her that I’m going to bed. Elizabeth comes rushing over to me, and she wraps her arms around my neck and kisses my cheek. I try to pull away from her, but I no longer can resist her ruby lips on mine. She kisses me and now is holding my face in her hands, and for the first time I’m welcoming someone else’s touch. What the hell am I doing? No! I can’t do this to her! No matter how my betraying body is responding to her?

  I pull away from Elizabeth. She stands there in shock, and I simply say good night, and leave her to watch me walk away from her. I enter my bedroom and slam the door behind me.

  I crawl into bed, hold Reese’s pillow, and try to breathe in any scent left behind.

  “Please baby, come home to me.” Darkness finally consumes me, and I fall into a deep sleep, dreaming of only Reese.

  SCRUBBING MY HANDS over my face, I lay here in my bed. Last night was not a dream. I got my ass kicked from two goons that I employed to help me find Reese. My ribs are fucking killing me, and I’m dreading the drive out to the Hamptons today.

  As I make my way downstairs, I hear sounds coming from my kitchen. Knowing my housekeeper is not here can only mean that Elizabeth indeed stayed the night. I can see the happiness written all over Elizabeth’s glowing face, as I enter my kitchen. This morning I am treated to the sweet smells of fresh rolls and coffee. For a brief minute, I had thought Reese had returned to me and surprised me with breakfast. Get a grip, man! It pains to me believe that she may be truly gone, but it’s the love that I have for her that keeps me hopeful.

  My appearance is much better from how my friend found me last night. I showered and dressed before greeting Elizabeth. I knew in my heart she was disappointed that we slept in separate bedrooms. After hearing her declaration of love for me, it was hard to not just take her where she was standing. My conscience won in the end, and I knew I couldn’t hurt her in that way.

  I don’t even know how she managed to prepare the breakfast she had waiting for me, but my table was set, and I had many choices to feast on. Hell, I didn’t even know I had food in my fridge?

  “Good morning, sleepy head. How did you sleep?” Her voice laced with concern.

  “Fine, thank you for asking.” Looking around the room, my apartment was sparkling clean, and Elizabeth was just smiling up at me. “How did you do all of this?” I gestured with my hand.

  “I can’t take all of the credit, but I did do most of it. Your housekeeper arrived a bit early for my taste, but got busy cleaning up last night’s disaster. I quickly went home to change and grab my bag for the weekend. Along the way back over here, I stopped at the Italian bakery you like and picked up all of your favorites. The grocer is nearby as well, so I picked up what you didn’t have in your refrigerator, which by the way was everything. I almost scolded your housekeeper for not stocking your kitchen, but in her defense, you never gave her the shopping lists like you normally do.”

  “Thank you. I really mean it, thank you.”

  Her eyes filled with tears. Shit! This is not what I want to see right now. It pained me beyond reason when Reese would cry. I can’t take it. I do what seems natural, and I take Elizabeth in my arms and hold her. She returns her affections and we stand quietly in each other’s arms. I lift her chin up with my finger and tell her, “No more tears today, I simply can’t bear it.” She gracefully wipes her eyes with a napkin, and we enjoy the meal she has prepared for us.

  “How are the ribs? Are you still in pain?”

  “They smart a bit, but I’ll be fine.”

  We finish our breakfast in silence and make our way out of the city. Our drive to the Hamptons is a quiet one. I’m deep in thought about Reese, but also about facing my family. I don’t want to hear, “I told you so” from my father. I still can’t prove he had anything to do with Reese leaving me, but I’m exhausted, and I just need to clear my head. Elizabeth is more than willing to fill any void I require.

  I look over to my friend who is leaning on my shoulder. “Elizabeth, wake up, we’re here.” Her eyelashes flutter, as she stirs in her sleep. She has been sleeping for more than an hour now, and so peacefully.

  “Hey,” she says as she stretches out her neck. “How long was I asleep?”

  “About an hour or so. I think you needed it after our long night. Thank you again for taking care of me, friend.”

  “Walker, stop thanking me for something that comes natural for me. I want to take care of you, love you, and be so much more to you than a friend.”

  Another declaration! Please make her stop, or I will lose all sense of my control, and fuck her right here in my car.

  I say nothing. The gates open, and I continue to drive up to the main house where my mother is waiting to greet me. She’s not alone. Henry and Gail Townsend are also there and looking too happy for my taste. Seeing me arrive with their daughter will only flame their wants for me and Elizabeth to be a couple.

  Her father opens her door, and takes her hand to help her out of my car. My mother is beaming at me and places two kisses on my cheek.

  “I’m so happy to have you home, my son. It has been far too long since your last visit.” My last visit was with Reese. How could I forget? It was the first time you met her, and father immediately had taken a dislike to her. Yeah, good times.

  “If you’ll excuse me, mother, I’ll be upstairs in my room.”

  “You will do no such thing, Walker! This party is for you, and we want to celebrate our son today. Please say hello to the Townsend’s, and try to enjoy yourself.” My mother pleads with me, and then flashes her infamous, “You will do this for me” smile.

  The house staff takes our bags, and I’m left standing there while Elizabeth and her parents make their way over to my mother. I feel trapped with no escape. Now I have her father approaching me.

  “Hello Walker, so nice of you to bring our daughter here with you today. I never liked Elizabeth driving alone, especially with such a long drive. It’s like three hours, tops! Where is he going with this?

  “It was no trouble at all, sir.” I shake his hand, and his wife gives me a quick hug. “How are you doing, Gail?” Her mother is truly one of the kindest women I have ever met. She’s very down to earth. Although they have money, she lives her life in a simple way.

  “I’m doing well, Walker. Thank you for asking. I just had a check-up last month, and happy to say that I am still cancer free.” Elizabeth’s mother had a scare a few years back with breast cancer, but her doctors caught it very early and she has been in perfect health since. Elizabeth didn’t take the news well at the time, but I assured her that her mom would be fine. I was the first person she confided in when she found out. I was happy that I could help my friend. This is one of the reasons why I can’t hurt her. She is too good of a person for me to just use to dull the pain from losing Reese. I need Elizabeth in my life as my friend, more than she knows. She is one of the few people that I can trust.

  “That’s great news, Gail. I hope your charity event brought in many
donations for this worthy cause.”

  “Yes, it was a success. We raised over a million dollars for our charity. Your mother and Elizabeth worked their magic with our sponsors and contributed many hard working hours to the event planning.”

  I roll my eyes. “Well, don’t give Olivia too much credit.” I wink at my mother. “She loves this and probably could organize it in her sleep.” Now that the pleasantries are said and done, I was exhausted and ready to break away to my room.

  “Walker, a word please?” I sigh and take a walk with Henry Townsend. “Thank you again for driving my daughter out here with you. Like I said, her mother and I worry when she travels alone.”

  Is he serious? She’s a big girl who can take care of herself; I have no doubt about that. Cut the apron strings a bit, and let her breathe! She had no problem last night showing and telling me what she wants.

  “I was happy to do it, sir. Please excuse me, I’m tired and I want to be alone.”

  “Walker, that’s just it. You’re not alone son. You have an entire home filled with friends and family that want to celebrate you today. Can you please try to have a good time? Don’t disappoint us today.” What the hell? Why is my personal happiness now important to Henry Townsend?

  “Excuse me, sir, but why are you so concerned about me? This party is no different than the hundreds of parties my mother has thrown over the years. I’m not in the mood to be put on display today, and I didn’t fucking ask for this damn party to begin with.”

  “Walker, I would think twice about using that language in front of me again. All that I have asked of you is to try to have fun. What is the problem here?”

  “Sir, I am no good to anyone right now, especially Elizabeth. I am drowning in my own pain right now. I don’t care to spend time with anyone. The only comfort I’m seeking right now is the unopened bottle of vintage scotch that is up in my room.” He looks disappointed in me after I proudly say that I would rather get drunk than be with his daughter.

  “Just try, son. You have so much to look forward to. This party is a way of closing one door and opening another. You can walk through that door with my daughter, if you just open your eyes to what is in front of you.” With that last piece of advice, he turns and walks away. I am in a state of play right now not knowing what move to make.

  As I finally make my way up to my room, there he stands, Phillip Reed. My father of course is guarded with me, never knowing how I will react to him. The feeling is mutual, and I am so not having this conversation with him.

  “Hello, Son.” He extends his hand out to me, as if I was a business associate.

  “Father,” I reply curtly.

  “My apologies for not being here upon your arrival, I had matters of business that required my immediate attention.”

  “No worries, I survived. Now, please excuse me.”

  “Can you spare a moment of your time for me?”

  “Father…that is all I’ve been doing for the past hour. I’m tired, and I want to be alone!”

  “Walker, please?”

  I move past him, and gesture for him to come in and sit down. He all too eagerly moves past me, and sits on my sofa.

  “I know you have been angry with me, but I assure you that your anger is misplaced. This is hard for me to say to you, but I am truly sorry for the state of affairs you are in right now. No parent wants to see their child hurting in the manner you are right now.” Who the hell is this man? And what has he done with my father? I don’t even have a response to this. He has never talked to me in this way before, and I am completely taken off guard here.

  “I am who I am, Walker, I make no apologies for anything I do in this life. You are my son, and I will not pretend to want certain things for you. Your future happiness is everything to me and your mother. You know who I want you to choose as your partner, this is no secret. It would make your mother and me extremely proud if you marry Elizabeth.” Holding my head to shut him out. I can’t do this today! “Eventually you will move on from Ms. Mitchell and find happiness again.”

  I silently count to ten in my head. Here sits my father, who I can’t decide is actually being genuine with me… or once again doing that thing where he shoves bullshit lies down my throat while calling it caviar. He hated Reese, and I still feel it deep down that he is not innocent with her leaving me. At this moment, I have no fight left in me, and I simply try to appease my father the best way I can.

  “If it’s all the same to you, father, please don’t concern yourself with my personal life. We’ve been down this road before, and it never turns out good for either one of us. I don’t need or care to hear one more time who is best suited for me to bed, marry, and have children with. I’m fucking done with the advice and the fake condolences for my broken heart. Now please show yourself out, and let me be. I will join the party when I’m good and ready to do so.” I can’t tell if my father is angry or proud of me with my act of rebellion, but he stands and leaves me alone in my room. I take out my bottle, and begin to drown very slowly in the abyss of my own personal hell… Reese.

  Here we go again…

  “WALKER, WAKE UP! You can’t miss your own party.” I jerk up suddenly, almost taking a swing at Elizabeth.

  “What the hell, Elizabeth! What are you doing in here, get out!” I feel like I’m going to puke, and that’s exactly what I do. Thank god Elizabeth saw it coming, and handed me the wastebasket. I emptied all the contents of what I had in my stomach, on top of all the alcohol I consumed. My body was racked with the dry heaves. I began to shake, and I vomited once more.

  “You idiot, Walker! Oh god, I hope you don’t have alcohol poisoning.” I vomited one more time, and I think I was done. She wrapped up the bag and tied it off. I went into my bathroom to brush my teeth. I walk out to find Elizabeth with her hands crossed over her chest, with a look of sheer disappointment. I guess she should get in line; it seems I’ve been hurting everyone that tries to help me these days.

  “Are you okay?’ her voice is laced with sympathy. She never could stay angry with me for long.

  “I’m fine, thank you again for helping me. Elizabeth, please go.”

  “I can’t. I’ve been sent up here to escort you to your own congratulatory celebration. Here is your tux, get dressed, now!”

  “Aren’t you the bossy kitty cat? What if I don’t want to get dressed, and join my party?” Now I’m just messing with her for the thrill of pissing her off. Elizabeth could hold her own with me, she always could.

  She eyes me up and down, and then she does something completely out of character. Elizabeth takes her hair down, gives it a shake to make it look all wild and untamed, gliding her tongue over her top lip. Fuck that was hot. Images of Reese, flash before my eyes. She did almost the same act of sexiness the first time we made love.

  “Have it your way, Walker. I guess I’ll have to undress you myself.” She grabs the hem of my t-shirt and begins to lift it over my head. I grab her hands and hold her in place. I can see the fire ignite in her eyes. She wants me, oh yeah. I think she would do just about anything for me at this moment. Why am I giving her the green light? Because I’m a guy who wants to get laid, and Elizabeth is right here and willing to give herself over to me and my desires... Damn you Reese for fucking leaving me!

  “I can get dressed on my own.” I say to her as I release her wrists.

  “Are you sure? I don’t mind being … of assistance.”

  “I’m positive. I’ll be down in a half hour, I promise. You can go tell my keepers that they have my word.” She smiles and kisses me on my lips.

  “Save me a dance tonight, or two.” Elizabeth sashays out of my room, and I’m left standing there with a throbbing dick.

  I let the hot water cascade over me, and I silently pray for some kind of sign that I will make it through this night. I’m such a bastard for playing with Elizabeth’s head and heart. She has been nothing but a good friend to me, and I’m an asshole at every turn with her. I don’t want to be he
re, that much is clear. Just for tonight, I’m going to put my bullshit aside, and my hurting heart, and try to be the friend she knows me to be. Please god, don’t let me fuck up again with her.

  I check my cell phone before I make my grand entrance. My phone inbox is full of text messages from friends congratulating me on early graduation. I have several missed calls from a couple of weeks ago, to a few days ago. I don’t recognize the number, and dial it back. The automated message tells me that the number has been disconnected. Strange? I don’t delete it. I know of some hackers that may be able to trace it for me. It could be a lead on Reese?

  No matter what my betraying body is doing with Elizabeth, my heart belongs to Reese and Reese only. Wherever you are baby, please feel my love, and come back to me. Tucking my phone in my pocket, I make my way down the grand staircase.

  Elizabeth is waiting for me at the bottom. I tuck her arm into the crook of mine, and admire how beautiful she looks. She has now tamed her long locks, and tied it back.

  “It’s time, Walker. You are the master of the room. Are you ready?”

  I cock my head to one side, and wink at her. “As I’ll ever be.”

  “DANCE WITH ME, Walker? I love this song.” The look in her eyes was a look that was slowly breaking my resistance down. Her eyes are shimmering. For the first time, I can really see how she feels about me. Her eyes say it all, along with her body. I’m rooted to where I stand. I am craving touch again. She senses my fear, but gently takes my hand in hers and leads me to the dance floor. “Have you ever really loved a woman” is playing right now by Bryan Adams. I guess it’s a fitting song, but honestly at this party I would have thought my mother would have hired a sixteen piece orchestra, not a DJ. She never ceases to surprise me.