False Pride

by Veronica Heley

  A stir in the doorway.

  An apologetic little man stood there. He looked totally inoffensive. Narrow-boned, wearing a shabby anorak over brown trousers. A dark red T-shirt showed at his neck. Ferdinand Rycroft. Ferdinand the Meek. Ferdinand, the arch-conspirator?

  Bea stumbled back into the big chair by the fireplace.

  Hilary gestured to Piers to take a seat. He obeyed, but he chose an upright chair over by the window instead of sitting on the settee beside Mrs Tarring.

  Bea sent her mind searching for contact with Piers’s mind … and found it. She understood that he’d chosen to sit at the opposite end of the room to her so that Hilary could not keep them both covered at the same time. If an opportunity arose, they could attack from two sides.

  But not yet.

  Not while Hilary had his taser so close to Lucas’s neck.

  Lucas stood. Mute. Eyes almost shut. Considering his options.

  Magda bit her fingers in distress.

  Shirley looked around. ‘Everyone sitting comfortably? Then let us begin. The jewels were not in the studio. The police had taped the front door, but there was no one on duty, so we went round the back and broke in through the kitchen. The jewels were not on the dais. They were not anywhere in the house, full stop. So, Miss Summerleys, we have to assume that you have been wasting our time. And what happens to people who waste our time? Tell her, Mrs Tarring.’

  Mrs Tarring gave a stifled sob. She tried to make herself small. She drew up her legs and put her arms over her head. A foetal position. Wishing herself a baby back in its mother’s womb.

  Shirley said, ‘Lucas, tell her what happens to people who waste our time.’

  ‘They get tasered,’ said Lucas. ‘Then they drink something to send them to sleep, and then they’re smothered with a pillow. Which they say is what happened to Owen.’

  Shirley said, ‘That’s exactly it!’

  Mrs Tarring was so frightened that she began to sob. ‘I didn’t mean … I didn’t think …! Please don’t hurt me again!’

  Hilary laughed. He took the gun away from Lucas and aimed it at Mrs Tarring. ‘Shall I give her another couple of seconds?’

  His sister shook her head. ‘Don’t waste time. Our priority is to find the jewels. After that you can play with them as you wish. But don’t kill them. We want them to be alive but in a drugged sleep, when the end comes.’

  Lucas said, ‘There’s too many of us for that to work. The police won’t believe in accidental deaths for all of us.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know. A little party, Mrs Abbot entertaining friends. Some stupid person laces the brandy and starts a fire.’ She looked around with critical eyes. ‘Yes, a fire will probably be the best way to finish them all off. Once they’re asleep, we’ll leave, but set a timer for about ten o’clock. They won’t know anything about it. They’ll all be dead asleep by that time.’ She laughed. ‘Dead asleep! That was clever of me, wasn’t it? That suit you, Ferdy?’

  A little jerk of the head. No words. Ferdy’s eyes were everywhere, sweeping the room from left to right and back again to Hilary and the taser. And off again. Searching for … what?

  ‘What she means,’ said Lucas, speaking through stiff lips, ‘is that once she has the jewels, she’ll make us drink a sleeping draught and set a timer to start a fire in which we’ll burn to death.’

  ‘Correct,’ said Shirley. ‘But first we get the truth from little Miss Innocence here. She’s not nearly as clever as she thinks, is she?’

  ‘And then,’ said Lucas, in the same dead tone, ‘Ferdinand will betray his brother and sister to the police, which will get him off the hook and leave him as King of the Castle.’

  ‘What?’ said Hilary, waving his stun gun around. ‘What did you say?’

  Shirley laughed. ‘Don’t be absurd, cousin Lucas. Why would he do that?’

  Ferdinand stifled a laugh with his hankie over his mouth.

  Lucas said, ‘Don’t be fooled by Ferdy’s meek and mild appearance, Shirley. He’ll let you do your worst. You’ll find the jewels and destroy anyone who can bear witness against you. And then you’ll be of no more interest to him, so he’ll turn you in. He’s not particularly interested in the jewels, you understand. What he’s after is—’

  ‘Shut up!’ said Ferdinand. He turned to Hilary. ‘Give it to him! Longer, this time. I’ve never liked him. Do it! Now!’

  Hilary wavered, looking from his brother to his sister and back again. ‘Shirley …? What’s Lucas on about?’

  Lucas almost smiled. ‘Have I got it right, Ferdinand? On Friday morning you were a long way from achieving your dream. You weren’t the prime mover in the plot to grab the jewels. Owen was. But you’d danced around on the fringes, helping the conspirators by planting the bug under my desk, and maybe one at Kent’s house and another in Owen’s new flat, too?’

  ‘No, no!’ A stifled laugh from Ferdy. ‘Not me.’ Yet it was clear that he had done just that.

  Lucas said, ‘Tell me; were you responsible for the death of Kent’s son Ellis? Way back last year? Perhaps you were.’

  ‘No, not me.’ Ferdinand produced a red hankie and mopped his brow. ‘Believe me, I had nothing to do with that.’

  ‘Or tampered with my brother George’s car?’

  Another snigger. ‘No, no. Not I. That was Owen’s little trick. He knew about cars, didn’t he?’

  ‘And you know that … how?’

  ‘By listening in on his landline, of course. He told Kent that their father was going round the twist and that he, Owen, wouldn’t be at all surprised if he had an accident in his car, the crazy way he drove.’

  ‘That’s not evidence.’

  Another snigger. ‘No, and you can’t prove I’ve done anything wrong.’

  ‘I believe you. On Saturday morning you had nothing on your conscience, except bugging various houses. At that point you learned that Owen had been killed, and that your brother and sister and the twins were all going to see if they could pick up where Owen had left off, and grab the jewels. You knew Kent and I were going to meet at the studio. And you went there … to do what? To tell Kent that you knew what had happened to Owen? To grab the jewels for yourself? What happened?’

  ‘He wanted to know why I was there, and how I knew Owen was dead. He was going to call the police. It was an accident. I didn’t mean to hit him, but he shouldn’t have accused me of doing anything wrong. It wasn’t my fault.’

  ‘Oh yes, it was. And then, by great good fortune, that very morning my brother killed himself in a car crash. You say you weren’t responsible. Well, the police will be looking into that, won’t they?’

  Ferdinand gave a hoarse cry. ‘No, I never! What do I know about cars? Shut up, shut up! Hilary, give him a good one!’

  His brow wrinkling with the effort to think, Hilary looked from Ferdy to Shirley and back. And hesitated.

  ‘And suddenly,’ said Lucas, ‘you realized that you were a couple of lives nearer to the prize.’

  Shirley’s eyes sharpened. ‘What! What prize?’

  Bea tried to watch everyone at once.

  Was that the front doorbell? Did no one else hear it?

  Bea made as if to move from her seat, only to have the taser swing round and point at her.

  ‘Back!’ Hilary meant it.

  Bea moved back into the depths of her chair but kept her hands on the arms so that she could shoot to her feet when the opportunity arose. If it arose.

  Lucas said, ‘Yesterday morning, Ferdy, there were three lives between you and what you dreamed of. You seized your chance to complete the good work, didn’t you, when you met Kent at the studio? Next on your list were the twins. You were in touch with them by phone. They kept you updated. You knew they were still searching for the jewels and hadn’t found them. You knew Shirley was busy that day, first disposing of Owen’s body, and then searching my place and Kent’s. You touched base with the twins at some point, and put a drugged drink in their car. As far as you were concerned, it did
n’t matter when they drank it, so long as they did so. You were only partially successful, however. One of them died, but the other survived, according to Mrs Abbot’s information.’

  Ferdinand shook his head, sniggering into his hankie. ‘Wrong! Neither of them made it!’

  Lucas blinked. ‘Both died? Really? Then there’s only one life between you and the prize. And I’m it.’

  Shirley’s mouth drooped open. She looked puzzled. ‘Ferdy …? You didn’t kill Kent, did you? And the twins?’

  Ferdy tittered. ‘Didn’t you guess? Silly you. Yes, there’s only one life to go now. Sorry, Lucas. Sorry. But you do see it’s necessary, don’t you?’

  ‘What’s he on about?’ asked Hilary, genuinely bewildered.

  ‘The title,’ said Lucas. ‘Ferdy didn’t start off to kill everyone who stood in his way, but after Owen died he saw that he was one step closer to the title. When my brother George died, the title descended to his son Kent. When Kent died the title descended to me, as I was next in line. But if Ferdy could get rid of me and the twins, then he would inherit both the title and the Rycroft fortune.’

  Ferdy giggled. ‘I only wish that Owen were still alive to see it. That would teach him to make fun of me.’

  ‘Your problem now,’ said Lucas, ‘is that you still haven’t found the jewels.’

  ‘That’s true. Ferdy, we’ll have this out later. In the meantime,’ Shirley turned on Magda, ‘we’re wasting time. Where did you put them?’

  Magda looked up at Lucas. ‘As God is my witness I put them, in their cases, in the garden shed. I did not betray you.’

  Lucas opened his eyes wide. ‘I believe you.’ His voice was rich, and low. A declaration of trust. A commitment?

  Magda continued to look at him, but spoke to Shirley. ‘Taser me as much as you like. I do not know where the jewels are now.’

  Lucas said, his eyes still on Magda, ‘Taser me again, too, if you like. I don’t know where they are, either.’

  Bea shot her eyes round to Piers. He was smiling faintly, sitting forward in his chair, ready to spring … or to run for it? But where could he run?

  The doorbell rang again.

  Everyone jumped.

  Who can that be?

  ‘Nobody move,’ said Shirley. ‘They’ll go away if we don’t answer it.’

  Lucas said, ‘You’ve run out of time, Shirley. Tell your brother to put his toy away.’

  ‘Not I!’ Hilary flourished it, first at Lucas and then at Magda. ‘Who gets it first, Shirl?’

  The doorbell rang again. Longer. Louder.

  Bea thought it was time for a distraction. ‘Hilary, when did you last put the battery on charge?’

  ‘What!’ He swung round on her.

  ‘The battery,’ said Bea. ‘I believe that a stun gun is powered by a battery. You’ve been using it a lot, haven’t you? Have you bothered to recharge it between whiles? I doubt it. I think the battery on your taser must be pretty low by now. Can you work out how many times you’ve used it, and for how long?’

  ‘Well, I …’ He looked at it as if he’d never seen it before.

  A childish voice spoke from the doorway. ‘Isn’t anybody going to answer the door?’ Little Bernice, full of righteous indignation.

  Everyone swung round to look at her.

  And, the alarm went off. YOWL!

  Piers charged at Hilary in a rugby tackle, sweeping him off balance and to the floor.

  The taser shot from his hand and landed in the hearth.

  Shirley lunged for it.

  Bea went for Shirley, knocking her sideways …

  But there was Ferdy, eeling his way past Bea to pick up the taser …

  THE NOISE!

  Lucas picked Ferdy up from behind and held him high with his feet dangling.

  Ferdy’s legs pumped the air.

  And the alarm stopped as quickly as it had begun.

  Everyone breathed heavily, recovering.

  Lucas said, ‘Magda, could you …?’

  Magda made a little jump to seize Ferdy’s wrist, the one that held the taser. She clung to it while Ferdy screamed thinly, trying to twist it round to press the trigger against her … And failed.

  A new voice made itself heard. ‘Mrs Abbot? Which is the householder? Police Constable Gordon, Constable Smart.’

  Two large women, who looked as if they could each go ten rounds with a heavyweight boxer.

  ‘We had a complaint about your alarm.’ The women were holding up police badges. They had sharp eyes, and were heavily muscled.

  Bea yelled, ‘Look out! That’s a taser in his hand!’

  The constable had her mobile phone out. ‘Back-up needed. Back-up needed.’

  Hilary rose to his knees and collapsed. Deprived of his power, he looked as if he were going to cry. ‘Shirlee …?’

  Bea clambered to her feet, pulling herself up by the mantelpiece. She caught the foremost constable’s eye. ‘I’m Mrs Abbot, the householder. You are more than welcome. Yes, my alarm has been malfunctioning. I will personally apologize to the neighbours, but I can’t get anyone to see to it till Monday morning. In the meantime, do you think you could remove that instrument of torture from Ferdy before he uses it again?’

  Hilary knelt and reached out with both arms for Shirley, like a toddler wanting reassurance from his mother. ‘Shirlee … tell them to go away!’

  Shirley ignored him to make a break for it. She had almost reached the door when Bea cried, ‘Stop her!’ and the second constable stuck out her foot. Shirley tripped and fell heavily.

  ‘What did you do that for, you nasty girl?’ Hilary said, and began to weep.

  Bea shouted, ‘You idiots! The taser! Someone, get it!’

  The constable stepped over Shirley to yank the taser from Ferdy’s hand. With due care.

  Shirley stirred. Slowly, she sat up, legs asprawl. She began to weep, too.

  Lucas said to Magda, ‘Are you all right?’

  Magda nodded. She passed a trembling hand over her forehead.

  Lucas held Ferdy out at arm’s length, and let go. Ferdy dropped to the floor, a limp bundle of bones held together by his clothing.

  Lucas brushed his hands off, one against the other. He looked down at Magda. ‘Well done.’

  She nodded and smiled up at him. Tears stood out on her cheeks. She’d been through a lot this last couple of days.

  He patted her shoulder.

  Ah!

  Constable Gordon said, in the penetrating voice of one accustomed to control unruly crowds, ‘Would someone kindly tell me what’s been going on here?’

  ‘With pleasure,’ said Bea. ‘Let me introduce you to some people who are – or perhaps I should say – ought to be, on your wanted list.’

  The constable looked annoyed. ‘And the taser? You do know they’re illegal – except for the police?’

  Bea said, ‘I’m delighted to hear it. Now, starting from the bottom …’ She pointed the miscreants out in turn. ‘Yesterday morning that man, Ferdinand Rycroft, murdered his cousin Kent by hitting him with a blunt instrument. After that he was responsible for killing his twin cousins by way of a drugged drink. Don’t be fooled by his meek demeanour; he’s poison. The man crawling over to his sister is Hilary Rycroft. Hilary is Ferdy’s younger brother. He’s the one who’s been laying about him with the taser. He’s dangerous, too. He killed Owen Rycroft, who was found in Magda’s bed yesterday. Hilary takes his orders from his sister Shirley, who’s now sitting there, crying. She’s probably not guilty of murder, but is guilty of assisting her brother in the disposal of a body. Although, come to think of it, you might also get her for smothering Owen after Hilary had knocked him out. But that’s conjecture and I don’t know which of them actually did the dirty deed. However, if you can’t get her for murder, you can certainly get her for stealing Lucas’s jade collection. Please take the stupid creatures away and do what you like with them. I have had it up to here and beyond! Oh, and do be careful with that taser; it’s killed an
d tortured more than one person so far.’

  ‘And I’m the Queen of Sheba,’ said the constable, not taking in a word of this. ‘And the rest of you are mere bystanders, are you?’

  ‘No,’ said Bea, exercising patience. ‘The rest of us are heroes. That big man there is Lucas, Lord Rycroft. It was in his flat that a man was found dead yesterday morning, and he owns the jade which Shirley stole. No doubt you’ll find it stashed away at her place. The man who looks as if he’s been bashed about a bit is my ex-husband, Piers, and it was at his studio that another Rycroft was found, dying, yesterday morning. That pretty woman is Magda Summerleys who has been tortured twice by those minions from hell.’

  The police constable said, ‘It all sounds most intriguing. Now, you’ve introduced everyone except that woman over there on the settee. What has she been up to? Drug dealing and white slave trafficking, I suppose?’

  Mrs Tarring was huddled in a corner of the settee, eyes peering out from under dishevelled hair. Half out of her mind.

  Bea was merciful, and looked to Lucas for a lead.

  He said, ‘I’m Lord Rycroft. The woman on the settee is the administrator for my family trust. I believe she was the unwitting dupe in all this. She did suspect something, but I don’t think she’s actually broken the law. She’s suffered enough, poor creature. Leave her be.’

  The larger of the constables had her notebook out. She gestured with her chin to Bea. ‘Let’s start at the beginning, shall we? You say you are the householder. Your name please?’

  ‘Bea Abbot.’ She spelled it. Was that the doorbell again? Whatever is going on here?

  ‘Now, Mrs Abbot, you have identified yourself as the householder, right? We’ve received a report about an alarm sounding off at all hours.’

  Bernice spoke up from the doorway, hands on hips. ‘How many times have I got to answer the door? There’s two police cars outside, full of big, sweaty men, who all want to know why they’ve been called out on a Sunday afternoon. Honestly, I turn my back for five minutes …! And, what are we going to have for supper, eh?’

  TWENTY

  Sunday evening

  Later, much later, after statements had been taken and the police had removed Ferdy, Shirley and Hilary, and Mrs Tarring had been taken to hospital to be checked over …