Post Grid: An Arizona EMP Adventure

by Tony Martineau

  “Can you believe this?” asked Jared. “I think everyone turned out, except a guard or two. I heard that James and Kurt drew the short straws.”

  “I'm sure some of the men will relieve them so they can have a nice meal too.” Kelly smiled. She bent sideways toward Jared's chair and said, “I love you.”

  He bent toward her and kissed her. “I love you too.”

  Bill brought Kelly and Jared another small plate of meat and set it between their two empty plates, saying, “Eat up, you'll need your strength.” Everyone within earshot laughed, and the party continued.

  When the meal was over, Jose and Rich came around the house with an end table. Rich held an index finger to his mouth, signaling the crowd to be quiet. They placed the small table behind the bride, between her and the house. Emma placed a large lace doily over it and went to Kelly's side, distracting her with small talk.

  Bea appeared at the kitchen door. “Attention, attention!” she said. “The ladies of Sunflower would like to present a surprise.” She opened the screen door widely and stepped off the stoop to give the other ladies room to emerge side by side holding the cake.

  The cake was snow white, three tiers high and decorated with beautiful pink frosting flowers.

  A more beautiful cake has never come from a professional bakery, Kelly thought. She stood and squeaked, “Oh my, how did you...?” She glanced at the ladies holding the cake, then at Lynn and her mother, then back at Jared, mouth agape. Lynn lifted her train as Kelly started for the cake table. Kelly turned and motioned to Jared to join her.

  “It took every last ounce of shortening we had in the entire village to make the frosting,” said Bea, proudly beaming from ear to ear. “The cake is from everyone in town. Six of us made it yesterday and we finished icing it here, today.”

  Kelly shook her head in disbelief, then raised her gaze before she spoke. “You all have been so wonderful...” She began crying, overwhelmed at their kindness.

  Jared placed his hand on her shoulder and continued where she had left off. “Yes, we can't thank you enough for doing all of this for us. It's a truly beautiful wedding, the most memorable wedding ever,” he exclaimed.

  “Cut the cake,” cried Janet.

  “Yeah, cut the cake!” Eager voices echoed her sentiment.

  Emma scurried about, getting the cake knife and a small plate from the closest guest table.

  “What should I do?” Kelly whispered anxiously. “I've never cut a cake this size!”

  “Just cut a small piece for you and Jared,” Emma winked. “I'll handle the rest.”

  “Smear it in her face,” called Rich, snickering.

  “Make it messy,” Jess yelled.

  A small piece of cake rested comfortably in Kelly's fingers, poised for Jared's mouth. He opened up and tilted his head back, ever so slightly. Kelly dropped it in, following it with a quick kiss.

  Next, it was Jared's turn. He took the small piece of cake that Kelly held for him and waited for her to open her mouth.

  “Don't let me down,” called Rich.

  Kelly squinted at Jared, giving him the evil eye, cautioning him not to do it. At the same time, she let the hint of a smile lift the corners of her lips.

  Squish, Jared ground the cake into Kelly's lips and face. Instinctively she pulled back, trying not to laugh the cake out of her mouth. At least there won't be pictures.

  “Let me make it up to you,” Jared said and proceeded to eat the cake from her face, ending in another kiss. Kelly let the smooth, sweet cake melt in her mouth. Roars of laughter erupted from those assembled.

  “Good man,” said Rich, slapping Jared on the shoulder.

  Kelly and Jared made their way back to their seats with Lynn following dutifully behind, taking her duties as bridesmaid very seriously. Emma started to cut the cake as guests brought their plates up from their seats. The white, cloud-like layers were skillfully carved into generous pieces.

  Everyone oohed and aahed over the cake, saying that they had never tasted any better.

  “I don't know if it's better, or if it's just that I haven't had any for so long,” Kelly sighed, closing her eyes and relishing every bite.

  “Both,” Jared agreed. “We have a truly amazing family.”

  “One more thing, everyone, please. We have a group gift,” said Bea. Janet emerged from the back door this time, carrying the huge quilt. She reverently took it to the bride's table as the other ladies rushed to remove plates, clinking silver on ceramic. A small gasp escaped Kelly as the quilt was unfolded, revealing the swirls of colors that resembled fall leaves blown up against a picket fence. Emma stepped up and helped too. Soon every woman who had helped cut and piece it was holding the quilt from its edges, beaming as they displayed their work.

  “What can I say?” said Kelly. “I'm overwhelmed.” She ran her hand over the thickly quilted squares, feeling its fine texture under her palm. Tears stood in her eyes, but didn't overflow their banks.

  The quilt was refolded and taken into the house. The party resumed. Kelly leaned into Jared, pushing him playfully to one side, and watched contentedly as her mom and friends reveled in her party.

  ****

  Jared and Kelly, sidesaddle in her long gown, rode side by side on Hokey and Pokey toward the Branham's place. A winter breeze chilled them. Kelly's satin gown swished back and forth to the rhythm of her horse's gait as they moved through the long shadows that fell over the canyon. Dennis followed at a respectable distance behind as their armed guard. They were, after all, on their way to their honeymoon.

  “Oh my gosh, Jared, wasn't it beautiful?” Kelly exclaimed, sighing deeply.

  “Yes, and you're the most beautiful part.” Jared blew Kelly a kiss from atop Hokey. “When I saw you coming down that aisle, I was sure I had died and gone to heaven. I wasn't expecting a long, white dress either. You practically floated.”

  “Thank you, kind sir.” Kelly winked at him. “You didn't look bad yourself.”

  “Yeah. Tim Nichols, Janet's husband, loaned me this suit.” He looked down at it. “Fits pretty good.”

  “I'd say. The whole day was wonderful: the arbor full of flowers, Lynn's 'Here Comes The Bride,' Dennis's beautiful ceremony, Rich's barbecued beef, all the wonderful food, the cake, the quilt—and then we had quite the hoedown at the end. It couldn't have been more wonderful. My mom slaved.”

  “A bit breezy, don't you think?” Jared shuddered like an autumn leaf in a stiff breeze.

  “It's always that way up here in the fall. Besides, I refuse to say a single negative thing on this perfect day.”

  The sun made its final drop behind the cliff, leaving them in darkness. Kelly shivered too.

  “Here, take my coat,” Jared said, slipping it from his shoulders. He guided Hokey next to Pokey and attempted to hand it to her.

  Kelly reached out, but reflexively reached back for her saddle horn when she tipped farther than she had envisioned. “Riding sidesaddle in satin on a western saddle is a bit tricky; I'm afraid I'll fall off. We're almost there. I can wait.”

  “I think I can see the turnoff up there. We'll get you inside.” Jared spurred Hokey, then remembered what Kelly had said about falling off, so pulled back on the reins to slow him down. Hokey gave a whinny in protest.

  Dennis yelled, “What's up?” in staccato.

  Jared called back leisurely, “Oh nothing, we're good.”

  “Jared?” Kelly said, making sure she had his attention. “My mom told me there's everything we could ever need in that house: clothes, food, dishes, firewood, everything. Wasn't that sweet?”

  “Wonderful. You and me, totally alone for three days. That's the best wedding present I could have imagined.”

  “Here we are,” Kelly said, motioning with her head to the left.

  Sure enough, it was the turn for the Branham's. Both riders eased into the driveway. When they got to the porch railing, they came to a stop. Pokey bobbed his head deeply at the prospect of jettisoning his rider.
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br />   “I'm coming,” Jared told Kelly as he jumped from Hokey. “Stay where you're at, I'll help you down.”

  Kelly did not object. Jared stood with his arms outstretched, ready to receive his bride, and Kelly slid smoothly from the saddle into his waiting arms. A short kiss followed, then Jared swept her up into his arms, her dress billowing to one side. In one fluid motion, he climbed the steps.

  “Hold up, you two!” Dennis called. Both looked up in surprise. He was tying Traveler to a tree not more than fifty yards from the house. The horse had a lawn chair, sleeping bag and Winchester tied behind the saddle. “We've got to clear the place.”

  Looking truly frustrated, Jared set Kelly down by the door. Instinctively he took her shoulders and moved her behind the door frame to wait for Dennis. “He's staying 'til his relief gets here at 2 a.m.”

  “You're kidding, out in this cold?”

  “Yep, Rich told me all about it. We're to have a twenty-four hour guard for all three days we are here. Not in the house, of course.” Jared screwed up his face into a funny expression that made Kelly giggle.

  Dennis bounded up the stairs to Jared's side.

  “I'll be right back,” Jared told Kelly, puckering his lips softly. “You go in first, Dennis.” Dennis looked at him questioningly, and a smile broke across Jared's face.

  “Just kidding, man.”

  Dennis reached forward with the door key and turned it in the lock.

  Jared lifted his eyebrows at the novel entry technique, then turned the door handle, cracked the door open and yelled, “Police!”

  Dennis looked at him questioningly. Again.

  “What?” Jared whispered loudly. “First thing that came to mind, habit,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

  Kelly giggled. “Mom said there was an oil lamp and matches on the table next to the door.”

  “Got it.” Jared called as both men disappeared inside.

  Kelly waited patiently at first. Then she started to fidget. She didn't have a gun; there wasn't a place for one in her gown. You've only been standing here two or three minutes, she thought to herself. She slumped against the wall and continued her wait. Another two or three minutes passed before Dennis came through the front door, tipping his cowboy hat to Kelly as he passed.

  “Good night, Mrs. Malloy,” he said with a straight face and walked toward Traveler.

  Jared appeared on the porch and lifted Kelly in his arms again. “There aren't any intruders in the house, Mrs. Malloy, but I can't say it's safe to go in, over the threshold with me, I mean.”

  “I'll take my chances, Mr. Malloy.” She kissed him softly.

  With that, Jared threw her into the air just a bit to reposition his grip, then strode forward. He slammed the door behind them by hooking the toe of his boot around the door and giving it a stern shove. The sound was lost to the wind.

  Dennis returned to his horse and started untying the knots that held his equipment. He smiled to himself while removing his bedroll and preparing to start a fire.

  ****

  “Do you hear that?” Kelly said, sitting straight up in bed, clutching the covers to her neck and nudging Jared's shoulder.

  “What?” Jared slurred, rousing from a sound sleep.

  “That!” Kelly said with more alarm.

  The sounds grew louder. It was a banging, but it had almost a musical quality. The volume increased by the minute.

  “What the...?” Jared sat up to the side of the bed and gathered his suit off the floor. He hadn't bothered to look for anything else to wear before getting into bed. “Get dressed,” he blurted.

  “In what?” Kelly asked, looking down at the huge white dress in a heap on the floor.

  “I'll find you something.” Jared went to the dresser at the end of the bed and opened the top drawer. There was some kind of light-colored garment sitting in it, and he tossed it to Kelly. “Try this.” With that, he sprinted for the front door and the din in the yard.

  He peeked out the front window. There had to be twenty people with lanterns and torches. They were all banging rhythmically on pots, pans, or buckets. One of them even had a drum.

  Kelly joined him at the front door, dressed in a long white nightgown. She put her hand on his shoulder and leaned forward to see too.

  Jared sensed her standing beside him. “It's a mob, and I'm going to get to the bottom of it. You stay here.” He went out onto the porch, dressed in the suit he had thrown back on. “What's the meaning of this?” he shouted.

  “Bring out the bride, bring out the bride!” The chant grew louder each time it was repeated. The crowd danced around each other, raising their torches high.

  “Dennis is with them,” said Jared, leaning in through the front door. The moon cast a pale glow, illuminating the man at the back of the crowd. “He's shouting too. Emma, Rich, they're all here.”

  “Bring out the bride, bring out the bride!”

  “I think they want you.”

  “But I'm not dressed,” Kelly cried, taking a small step backward.

  Jared took that same small step toward her. “You're dressed, you have fabric over you. Just come out for a second, maybe they'll leave.” He put his hand out and motioned with his fingers for her to take it. She did, tentatively. “Come on,” he said, pulling on it gently. “I'll be with you.”

  Kelly thought about the crowd and then Jared. I'll trust him.

  They stepped together onto the porch to boisterous cheers and clapping.

  The chant abruptly changed to, “Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss...”

  The young couple looked out at the crowd, then at each other. Jared raised his shoulders and his eyebrows. Kelly copied his movements exactly, then fell into his arms. The newlyweds kissed. Kelly tried to pull away, but Jared would have none of it and kissed her for a full minute.

  The kiss was the finale of the evening.

  The crowd turned and went as they had come, the banging fading little by little. Everyone left except Dennis, who sat back in his chair by the tree.

  Epilogue

  Kelly Malloy fidgeted with the dials on the Clansman radio. The speaker emitted an unearthly, off-frequency voice. She slowly tuned in until Sam Wise's speech became normal.

  “Hi, Dad. Our preparations are going well. Jose and Jess have finished the wagons. We have enough tack for two wagons and a spare set. The horses are mostly broken to the wagons already.”

  “How many total?” asked Sam.

  We'll be six souls and seven horses. I'm hoping to keep the teams fresh. Over.”

  “Seven horses? That seems like a lot of stock to water in the desert. Over.”

  “We're going to need all of them to make the long, steep pulls. I'm afraid to cut down. If any wear out, go lame or get sick, we're stuck in the middle of nowhere. The water will work out,” she said, more hopefully than declaratively. “We've gone over the topo maps in the Arizona Gazetteer a hundred times. There are wells and springs along the way. Jose has put water tanks on the wagons. Over.”

  “I'll have to trust you. Your friends sound pretty amazing and I never have been able to get you or your mother to change your minds about anything. Hey, Cowgirl, how's that new son-in-law of mine?

  “Jared is wonderful,” she said and looked at her husband, giving him a smile. “I can't wait for you to meet him in person. Over.”

  “I can't wait to meet him either. Are you set? Over.”

  “As set as we can be. Night, Daddy. Over.”