Sing As We Go

by Margaret Dickinson

  ‘Close the door, Kathy, and come and sit down.’

  ‘Shall I – make the cocoa?’

  ‘Not just now.’ Jemima nodded towards the chair opposite her. ‘Sit down.’

  For a moment there was silence in the room. At last Jemima asked quietly. ‘Where have you been tonight, Kathy? And I want the truth.’

  Kathy thought quickly. Somehow, Jemima knew that she had not attended choir practice.

  ‘I – I’ve been out with a – a friend.’

  ‘You haven’t been to the choral society meeting?’

  Kathy bit her lip and shook her head. Then she looked up defiantly and met the older woman’s gaze calmly. After all, she was not answerable to Miss Robinson. As long as she respected the woman’s home, which she did, and came in at a reasonable hour, which she did also, what right had Jemima to question her?

  But it seemed as if Jemima felt she had every right to question her. ‘And this – er – friend. Would it be a male friend, by any chance?’

  Kathy’s chin rose higher. ‘And what if it is?’

  Jemima sighed. ‘Kathy, I’m not trying to play the heavy father here. You’ve had enough of that, I know. But – but it’s who this friend is that I’m concerned about.’

  ‘It’s no one you know.’

  ‘No more lies, Kathy, if you please,’ Jemima snapped, her patience at an end. She closed her eyes for a moment and sighed heavily. ‘You disappoint me, Kathy. I thought you were an honest girl. Betty vouched for you. Amy thinks the world of you, and Maurice – well – as for poor Maurice, I expect you’ve quite broken his gentle heart.’

  There was a stillness, as if the whole room was holding its breath.

  ‘I’ve had two visitors tonight, Kathy. One – Mr Spencer – has only just left a few minutes ago. He came round as soon as he got home to enquire if you were all right, as you hadn’t been to the meeting.’ She paused and then went on. ‘The other was a little earlier. Miss Curtis called to see me and what she had to tell me has disturbed me greatly.’

  ‘Is she not satisfied with my work? Is that it? Does she want me to leave?’

  ‘No, no, not at all. As it happens she’s very pleased with your work. She says you’re doing very well, particularly bearing in mind that you’ve had no previous experience.’

  Kathy frowned. ‘Then – what?’

  ‘She happened to be walking down High Street earlier this evening when she saw Mr Kendall’s car. A car, I might add, that she is very familiar with.’ Jemima paused to let her words sink in.

  So, Kathy thought, the secret was out and Miss Curtis had wasted no time in telling tales to the woman who was not only her landlady but also had the power to have her dismissed immediately and without a reference.

  ‘Is there a company rule against a friendship between employees?’ Kathy asked stiffly.

  ‘No,’ Jemima said carefully, ‘although it is unwise between two people of such differing ranks, shall we say. It can lead to resentment among the other staff if they were to perceive any favouritism.’

  ‘But we – he – has certainly not shown any favouritism towards me at all. He hardly ever comes into the department, let alone . . .’

  ‘I know. I realize that. If he had, I might well have smelt a rat before now.’

  ‘A rat!’ Kathy’s anger flared. ‘Is that how you view – our – our friendship?’

  Jemima pursed her mouth and nodded, but there was a hint of sadness in her eyes. ‘My dear, you might not believe me, but I really do have your best interests at heart.’

  Kathy’s expression was sceptical and Jemima, catching sight of it, closed her eyes and shook her head in a gesture of helplessness.

  After a long pause, Jemima opened her eyes and looked directly at Kathy. ‘There are a few things you should know about Mr Kendall, my dear—’ she began, but Kathy jumped to her feet.

  ‘I don’t want to hear them and anyway, I’m moving out. I won’t be a trouble to you any more. Tony’s found me a flat and—’

  ‘Ah, the flat. The famous flat. He’s setting you up in the flat, is he? This is worse than I thought.’

  ‘No, he’s not setting me up in it, as you put it. You make me sound like a – a mistress!’

  ‘And aren’t you?’ Jemima asked bluntly.

  Kathy felt an embarrassed flush flood into her face. ‘No, I am not,’ she answered heatedly. ‘How dare you imply any such thing?’

  ‘Well, that’s one good thing, I suppose,’ Jemima murmured, unperturbed by the girl’s outburst. ‘But once he gets you into that flat where he can visit you any time he likes—’ She paused and then added, ‘It’s the flat on Mill Road, I suppose?’

  Kathy’s mouth dropped open as she stared at Jemima. Her voice was husky as she faltered, ‘What – what do you mean? The flat on Mill Road?’

  ‘Kathy – please – sit down. At least listen to what I’ve got to tell you.’

  Slowly, Kathy sank back into the chair. She sat forward, tense and fearful, her hands so tightly clasped together in her lap that her knuckles were white. Against her will, she waited to hear what Jemima had to say.

  Thirteen

  ‘Tony Kendall is a very nice young man, I won’t deny that—’

  ‘Then why—?’ Kathy began, but Jemima held up her hand to silence her.

  ‘He comes from a good background – ’ she hesitated briefly before adding, ‘but it’s his family that’s the problem.’ She paused. ‘He’s related to the Hammond family.’

  Kathy gasped. ‘The – the owners of the store?’

  Jemima nodded. ‘It isn’t talked about because the obvious would be said.’

  ‘What d’you mean? The obvious?’

  ‘That he’s very young to be in such an important position. It could be seen as nepotism.’ She smiled wryly. ‘James Hammond is his mother’s cousin and many would say Tony’s only the manager because of his relationship to the Hammond family.’

  ‘So his mother was a Hammond?

  Jemima nodded. ‘It was her mother, to be precise, who was the Hammond. She was sister to the old man, as we call him, Mr Anthony Hammond.’

  ‘Tony did say we should keep our – our meetings secret,’ Kathy said slowly. ‘I expect he thinks Mr James wouldn’t approve.’

  ‘Actually, Mr James is a very nice man, down to earth and not in any way snobbish. No, I’m afraid the problem is Tony’s own mother.’

  ‘His mother? Has she got something to do with the store?’

  ‘Oh no. But Tony – whom she always calls Anthony, by the way – is her only son. Her only child and she – is a very possessive woman.’ Jemima met Kathy’s puzzled gaze. ‘You haven’t met her yet, I take it?’

  Kathy shook her head. Suddenly she was feeling very cold inside. This wasn’t at all what she had expected Jemima to say and for some inexplicable reason she feared what was coming next.

  ‘How many times have you been out with Tony?’

  ‘Well – several times over the weeks.’

  ‘And how many times has he left suddenly, not turned up at all or cancelled at the last minute?’

  Kathy’s mouth dropped open as she stared, horrified, at Jemima. ‘How – how did you know?’

  ‘Because it’s happened before. It’s what always happens to his girlfriends.’

  Remembering what Stella had told her, Kathy whispered, ‘Miss Curtis? It happened to her?’

  ‘You know about Muriel?’

  ‘Yes – someone told me.’

  ‘Stella, I expect,’ Jemima murmured.

  ‘Oh, please, I don’t want to get her into trouble . . .’

  ‘It’s all right. Actually, I’m pleased she has. Perhaps it will help you to believe what I’m telling you now.’

  For a moment, Kathy covered her face with her hands and gave a little sob. Then with a supreme effort, she raised her head and said quietly, ‘I do believe you. I know you wouldn’t lie to me. And – and I’m sorry that I ever lied to you. I hated doing it. I really am a ve
ry truthful person – usually. But somehow, I knew you’d try to stop me seeing him if you found out.’

  ‘I most certainly would have done,’ Jemima said briskly. ‘Make no mistake about that.’

  There was silence between them for a moment until Kathy said, ‘But his mother’s – well – some sort of invalid, isn’t she? I mean, if she needed him when his father was working, I didn’t mind.’

  ‘Personally, I think she’s a hypochondriac who uses her so-called ill-health to manipulate both her husband and her son.’ Jemima’s expression softened as she added, ‘George – Tony’s dad – is, by all accounts, a lovely fellow. He’s too good, if you know what I mean.’ Not having met Tony’s parents, Kathy didn’t really know. Though she was starting to understand a little more. And she didn’t like what she was hearing. ‘Beatrice Kendall is a selfish, devious woman who will stop at nothing to keep her son living at home with her.’

  ‘What happened to Muriel – Miss Curtis?’

  Jemima shook her head, as if she was still unable to believe herself what she was about to confide in Kathy. ‘Poor Muriel. I think she was very fond of Tony and we all thought he was fond of her too. We were pleased for them. Oh, we’d heard rumours about other girlfriends he’d had, but we thought this time it was the real thing – for both of them.’ She sighed. ‘But then he took her home to meet his parents. Beatrice was very unpleasant towards Muriel. But worse than that, she made it her business to find out about the girl’s family. Years ago, there was a scandal about Muriel’s father embezzling money from the firm he worked for. Not Muriel’s fault, of course. She was only a child at the time. It was nothing to do with her. But Beatrice latched on to it. She tried to persuade Tony that Muriel was not right for him. That his involvement with her would damage his career and his reputation.’

  ‘And he believed her and ended the – the friendship?’

  ‘No – no, credit due to him, he didn’t. It was Muriel who ended it.’

  ‘Muriel? Why?’

  Jemima held her gaze for a moment. ‘You do realize that I am trusting you not to say a word about all this to anyone. Not anyone, Kathy. I only know about it because poor Muriel was so distressed at work – well, let’s just say she confided in me. I shouldn’t really be telling you. I never betray confidences.’ Despite the gravity of their conversation she allowed herself a small smile. ‘Just like you never lie. We both seem to be breaking our own rules, don’t we?’

  Kathy smiled guiltily.

  ‘Anyway,’ Jemima went on. ‘It seems that Beatrice sent for Muriel to go to their house – without Tony being present. She told her that Tony was too loyal to end the relationship himself, but that if she, Muriel, had any true feelings for him, she would end it to save his career and his good name.’ Jemima sighed. ‘I suppose Muriel felt she had no choice. There would never have been any kind of friendliness with her in-laws, Beatrice would’ve made sure of that. And Tony would have been in the middle of what would probably have become a battleground.’ She was silent for a few moments, allowing Kathy time to digest it all.

  ‘So Muriel loved him enough to sacrifice her own happiness.’

  ‘That’s how Beatrice made her see it, yes.’ Jemima sniffed. ‘But in my opinion she would have been better to have fought for her man.’ Then she sighed. ‘Muriel is an excellent head of department, but I’m afraid she lacked the courage to stand up to the woman.’

  ‘And you think I do too?’

  For a moment Jemima regarded her solemnly, then slowly, she smiled. ‘No,’ she said quietly. ‘No, I think you’re made of sterner stuff. But I can still see you losing in the end. Beatrice is a formidable woman and her methods are clever. No one dares to call her bluff. Certainly, poor George and Tony dare not. She might, indeed, be genuinely ill.’ She sighed. ‘I expect nothing I say can dissuade you, but at least I wanted you to know exactly what you are getting yourself into.’

  Kathy nodded.

  ‘And as for moving into this flat, well, there’s no need for that. If you want to stay here, you can.’

  ‘Even if I go on seeing him?’

  Jemima nodded and now her smile was pensive. ‘Oh Kathy, you might not think it to look at me now, but once upon a time I was young and in love and – I have to admit – very, very foolish.’

  ‘And – you think I am?’

  Again Jemima regarded her solemnly, searching the pretty face before her, seeing the determined set of Kathy’s chin, the spark of defiance in her eyes. ‘I think,’ she said slowly, ‘that you could be letting yourself in for a lot of heartache. Falling in love should be a happy time, the most joyous time . . .’ For a moment Jemima’s eyes were alight with joy at her own memories but then they were suddenly clouded with sorrow. Kathy, who had been on the point of asking what had happened to Jemima in her youth, now dared not ask the question. If even thinking about it in her own mind brought back such a sad and haunted look, then asking Jemima to talk about it would be cruel. Though Kathy longed to know. Perhaps she could ask Amy, though she doubted her friend knew any more than she did. It seemed to be a closely guarded family secret.

  Instead, she said, ‘Thank you for telling me and, yes, I would like to stay here. I can’t really afford the flat and I don’t want to be – well – I don’t want Tony to be paying for it. That wouldn’t be right. But – ’ she paused and her tone took on a determined edge – ‘I do intend to go on seeing him.’

  Jemima sighed but said, ‘Very well. As long as you understand you will be the subject of some unpleasant gossip and possibly even ridicule for a while. Until they find someone else to tear to shreds,’ she added tartly. ‘You’ll have all sorts of people telling you tales about all the girlfriends he’s had and how he’s left a trail of broken hearts behind him.’

  ‘I’ve already had a couple. The first time he took me out, he left halfway through the meal – just like you said – because a message came that his mother had been taken ill. After he’d gone, a woman from another table came and spoke to me. Evidently, she was one of his former girlfriends. At the time, I thought she was just being spiteful. Now I see that perhaps she was genuinely trying to warn me.’

  ‘It’d be a lot easier if he was really a cad,’ Jemima sighed. ‘But he isn’t. He’s a nice young man, just weak where his mother is concerned. And whether that can be classed as a fault, even I’m not sure. And usually,’ she smiled mischievously, ‘I have no problem in making my mind up about folks and saying so too, if I think fit.’

  ‘I’ve noticed,’ Kathy teased and the two women exchanged a glance. In it there was a new understanding, even a fondness for each other that had grown over the weeks that Kathy had been there and had been even more strengthened by tonight’s conversation.

  ‘So,’ Kathy went on. ‘You and Taffy don’t want your house to yourselves again then?’

  Jemima laughed out loud. ‘I like having you around, but I have to admit it’s mainly because of Taffy that I’m asking you to stay. If he has taken to you – and he certainly has – then you must be all right.’

  The two women laughed together and, getting up, Kathy said, ‘I’ll make the cocoa and call him in to give him an extra saucer of milk to say thank you.’

  Fourteen

  The first few days back at work were difficult. The gossip had spread, and Kathy tried to ignore the glances, the whispered conversations that halted as soon as she came near. Hardest to bear was Stella’s attitude. One moment she was friendly enough, the next cold and distant.

  But it was Miss Curtis who caused Kathy the most discomfort. It must have been her who had told work colleagues. She didn’t think Stella would have broken her word and yet now she couldn’t be sure. Once or twice she saw her whispering to the young assistant from lingerie, their conversation ceasing as soon as Kathy drew near. She knew that Jemima would say nothing to anyone. So – that left Muriel. Kathy longed to talk to her superior about it, but she couldn’t. That would be betraying Jemima’s confidence and, now that they had arri
ved at a mutual understanding and respect, she had no intention of doing so.

  As if he too realized that ‘the word was out’, Tony started coming to the millinery department and speaking to her, making no attempt now to hide the fact that they were walking out together.

  ‘Actually,’ he whispered. ‘I’m glad it’s out. I don’t like all this cloak-and-dagger stuff. It’s exciting at first, but then it gets a bit wearing.’

  Kathy smiled weakly, biting back the retort: Well, you should know about that!

  ‘Have you made up your mind about the flat?’

  ‘Yes, I have. I’m staying where I am for the moment. Now there’s no need for secrecy, I’m happy with Miss Robinson. She’s been very kind to me.’

  Tony looked disappointed. ‘Well, if you’re sure. It won’t be so easy to be together, though, will it? She’ll still be keeping her beady eye on you.’

  ‘We can go out to the pictures, to restaurants, for drives in the country.’

  ‘Yes, but I want to be alone with you. I want to – well, you know . . .’

  Though a faint blush rose in her cheeks, Kathy faced him squarely. ‘I’m not that sort of girl, Tony. Maybe your past girlfriends – and oh yes, I do know there have been a few – have let you have your way with them, but not this one.’ With that she had flounced away, leaving him staring after her in confusion.

  That night when he took her out to dinner, Tony said, ‘You misunderstood me earlier today. I can guess what the gossip is about me, but I want you to believe me that it’s not true. Yes, I’ve had a few girlfriends – ’ he sighed – ‘but there was only ever one other before you that I was serious about. And she – she was the one who finished our friendship. Not me.’

  Before Kathy thought to stop herself, she blurted out, ‘Muriel Curtis?’

  Tony’s eyes widened. ‘How d’you know?’

  Kathy could have bitten her tongue off. ‘I – I guessed,’ she lied. ‘I saw she was very upset when you’d been into the department one day and I – I overheard a conversation I shouldn’t have done.’