Momentous Kisses: Love in Sandy Beach

by Gray, Jessica

  It went straight to voicemail, so he tried again. And again. Until he finally saw how futile it was. He sat rigidly on the couch as the voices in his head went into overdrive.

  You knew this was going to happen. Every time you try to be happy, your life falls apart. You finally found out you love her and she’s left you. Everyone you love leaves. You don’t deserve to be happy.

  He called her again, continuing late into the night, but each time all he got was her voicemail. The more he tried to figure out where things had gone wrong, the more he grew angry at her. How dare she stand him up like this? The whole test was her idea and now she’d backed out?

  Russell had started to work up a genuine rage when his beeper went off. He picked it up on autopilot and glanced at the number. It was the clinic, and amidst his fog of confusion and self-pity, reality set in and he remembered that he was the doctor on call tonight.

  The answering service informed him one of his patients had experienced complications after waking up from the anesthesia.

  Tossing the note on the table, he hurried back to the clinic and dealt with the situation in front of him. It was almost three hours before the emergency was under control and he returned home with an empty feeling.

  He paused outside the door, wishing the past few hours had been nothing more than a dream. That he’d open the door and find Allison waiting for him with a bright smile on her face. But Russell was a realist. He knew what he’d find on the other side of the door. Emptiness.

  In an impulse he rushed out to the garage, with the intention of driving to Sandy Beach and demanding an explanation from Allison, but then he stopped himself. It was past midnight and it wouldn’t make any sense to drive two hours, arrive in the middle of the night, and then have to rush back before dawn to arrive at the community clinic the next morning at 7 o’clock.

  Sad beyond belief, he dragged himself inside and fell onto his bed fully clothed. It would be best to wait for the next morning. Maybe things would look brighter then?

  Chapter 19

  Allison wept the entire drive back to Sandy Beach. It was sheer luck she’d been able to control the car at times, but she made it.

  Instead of going home, she headed straight for her favorite spot near the lighthouse. She’d spent hours sitting in this exact spot watching the sunset and the waves roll in. Usually the place helped her find calm and reconnect with herself. But tonight, nothing lightened her mood.

  I’m pregnant. It’s Russell’s baby, but I can’t tell him. He’ll believe I’ve done it on purpose to trap him. I’ve lost him.

  She’d manage to cope alone and forget Russell Barkin. He was a thing of the past. But her phone kept ringing and reminded her that the past was still trying to reach her. She finally turned it off; she just couldn’t talk to Russell right now, or to anyone else for that matter. Sometimes solitude was a blessing.

  Allison stared into space towards the lighthouse. After a while, darkness fell, but she kept sitting there with her legs crossed, her head heavy from too many tears, unable to stand up and walk home.

  Her tears dried up, but they left behind a jumble of thoughts she couldn’t quiet. It was almost midnight when she made her way back to her small place. Sleep, though, wasn’t in the cards for her. Too many thoughts rolled around in her head.

  She finally fell into a restless sleep. In the morning she woke to the already familiar queasy stomach. But that didn’t mean anything, right? Everyone can have a queasy stomach.

  The day before she’d stopped at a convenience store before returning to Russell’s apartment and purchased one pregnancy test of each brand the store had carried. Just in case. Three tests in total.

  One hour later she was still sitting at the kitchen table glaring at three positive tests when the doorbell rang. She glanced at the door, not sure if she should answer it or not.

  What if Russell had driven up here to confront her?

  When the person on the other side of the door pushed the buzzer again, she crept to the window and peeked out, relieved to see her sister. Reluctantly, she opened the door and Reese came barging right in. As soon as the door closed, Allison found herself wrapped in her sister’s arms. It was enough to break the dam she had on her emotions, and she sobbed brokenly in her arms.

  “I had to drive down here when you wouldn’t answer your phone,” Reese told her. “I was so worried about you.”

  Allison wiped the tears from her eyes. “You didn’t have to drive all the way down here.”

  “It’s only twenty minutes, and of course I did, honey.”

  Allison hugged her sister, taking the wad of tissues pressed into her hand. “Thanks.”

  “What did Russell say when you told him?”

  “I didn’t. I escaped before he came home.”

  “Ally. Why would you do that?”

  “I don’t want him to believe I did this on purpose. It’s better if he doesn’t know.”

  Reese didn’t point out he would eventually find out; they were bound to see each other at family events. Instead, she caressed Allison’s head like her mother had done when they were young. “Russell has a right to know. It’s his decision if he wants to continue a relationship or not.”

  Allison quirked her eyebrows., “No. It isn’t.”

  Reese knew her sister well enough to slightly change the topic. “So, how was the week with him?”

  “Fantastic. He is such a wonderful man. Caring, fun, full of surprises, and a fantastic lover.”

  Reese rolled her eyes. “So why did you run away?”

  Allison shrugged her shoulders.

  “Honey, you are making rash decisions. You need to tell him.”

  Allison continued to shake her head, totally unreceptive to her suggestions.

  Reese didn’t insist further. When Allison had her mind set it was next to impossible to convince her otherwise. “I have to leave for work. Promise to call me if you need anything. And don’t forget the barbecue tomorrow night.”

  Allison panicked. “The barbecue. I can’t go!” There was no way she could spend any time around her mother right now. Bridget Paxton had a radar for finding out everything her kids wanted to hide.

  Reese could see the fear on her face and promised, “I won’t say anything. We’ll find a way to keep Mom in the dark. But you have to be there or she will know something’s going on, and then you’ll be on her list.”

  “Yeah. And that’s the last thing I need.” No one wanted to be on her mother’s watch list. That meant Bridget would be showing up unannounced and talking to anyone she thought might have information to share. It was the worst possible scenario, and Allison was willing to do just about anything to avoid that.

  Chapter 20

  Russell was worried sick – and furious at the same time. Why won’t she answer my phone calls?

  He didn’t understand what was going on with Allison, but right now he didn’t have time to ponder it any longer. He was sitting in a restaurant downtown, waiting for Joyce Armstrong to arrive.

  Since his sister Toni had coupled up with Douglas Armstrong, he’d grown to like Joyce. She treated him as one of her kids, and he actually enjoyed her motherly caring for him.

  They’d agreed to meet for lunch a while ago; she wanted to pitch him the newest project of her charity for neglected children, “Joys for Children.”

  It was a worthwhile charity, and Russell didn’t mind helping out with whatever she needed. Minutes later Joyce arrived and the warmth of her smile echoed in her voice when she greeted him. “Russell, how good to see you again.”

  Her welcoming attitude eased the pain in his heart, and after talking for a while about the upcoming charity event, he was glad he hadn’t cancelled the lunch date. That woman was simply amazing; at sixty she still had the drive and energy of a young woman, combined with the wisdom and warmth of a mature lady. He well understood why all the Armstrong siblings and their partners loved her so much. Heck, even he loved her.

  He waited wit
h his announcement until the waiter took their empty plates away. “So, I’ve made a decision about the clinic.”

  “You have?”

  He nodded. “Yes. It was long overdue, but I finally told Dex I wanted to stop doing cosmetic surgery.”

  She raised an eyebrow. “I don’t imagine he took that very well.”

  “He didn’t. We decided it would be best for the clinic and for me if he found someone to buy me out.”

  Joyce put her hand on his arm. The gesture reminded him of his own mom, and he had to blink away a tear. Joyce would never take her place in his heart, but maybe, just maybe it was time to revisit the grief and let it go.

  He felt like a traitor, but wasn’t that what life was about? Bad stuff happened, but you had to deal with it and move on? He didn’t have an obligation to feel miserable for the rest of his life, or did he?

  “So what will you do instead?” Joyce’s voice broke through his reasoning.

  “I’m not sure yet, but whatever it is, it will be to help people.”

  Joyce sent him a wave of love with her smile. “I’m very proud of you, Russell. If you follow your heart, you’ll find the place you’re supposed to be. I have to admit, it’s pained me to see you so miserable.”

  “I didn’t realize it was so obvious.”

  “Not to everyone, but remember, I raised seven children and have a sixth sense for hidden emotions. I know you’ve never gotten over losing your parents.”

  When he looked at her with his mouth open, she continued, “Russell, it might be time you let go of the hurt from the past. Your parents loved you and Toni so much, they would have never wanted you to live your life this way.”

  “What way?”

  “Hiding from love. Hiding from investing your emotions in people and situations. Your mom would have wanted you to be happy, to find a girl you love, to start a family of your own, have children.

  “You can’t have the good without experiencing the bad as well. It’s like day and night, one doesn’t exist without the other. But trust me, it’s worth it in the end.”

  Russell wasn’t sure he believed her but he appreciated the advice. “I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

  “You do that. Now, I need to run or I’m going to be late to meet with the board of directors. I have to tell you I enjoyed Sam and Grant’s party at the beach house so much.

  “It had been almost quite a few years since I’d last met all of the Paxton kids. Allison is such a sweetheart. I hope you’ll find a happy girl like her to share your life with.”

  Russell didn’t dare to breathe, afraid he’d choke.

  Joyce gave him a scrutinizing look before she continued. “Speaking of Allison, I was almost positive I saw her down at the lakeside yesterday afternoon. She was sobbing and looked very troubled, so I left my lunch and hurried down to where I’d seen her to offer my help. When I got to the place, no one was there. But, then it probably wasn’t Ally. What would she be doing in Chicago?”

  Russell stared at the woman as she stopped speaking; he felt exposed. Was this a coincidence or did Joyce know something?

  He mumbled something unintelligible, and quickly waved her goodbye, now seriously worried about Allison. My Ally was crying in the park? What was going on?

  Chapter 21

  With some trepidation, Allison attended the barbecue at her parents’ house. Her mother seemed to sense that she was hiding something, but Allison did her best to evade getting cornered.

  Reese stood by her word and was her ally in this, constantly interrupting their mother’s attempt to start an inquisition and turning her attention to something more pressing. If the reason weren’t so serious, she’d have enjoyed the cat-and-mouse game.

  It was the last day at home for her second oldest brother Chase, before he left for yet another kitesurfing contest. He was one of the top competitors in this up-and-coming sport, and Reese managed to use that to their advantage. Between the two of them they kept Chase talking for most of the evening.

  Their father Mitch had been a competitive sailor in his younger years, and joined the conversation. He loved to talk about his competitive years and about sports in general. Chase and Mitch soon had everyone – most importantly Allison’s mother – listening.

  When the conversation about sports dwindled, Reese turned everyone’s attention to the lake and the tourists, a topic that was both loved and hated by all Sandy Beach residents.

  By the time Grant and Samantha arrived, Bridget had given up her attempts to interrogate her youngest daughter and instead focused on them.

  “So, what are your plans?”

  Samantha exchanged a glance with Grant and then answered for them both, “Well, Bridget, Grant and I have talked about things and I’ll continue my modeling career for a few more years.

  “We both want kids, but I don’t fancy the added pressure of having to worry about getting my figure back after a pregnancy. Besides, I want time to spend with our children and I don’t think I can do that while I’m still modeling.”

  Allison noticed the not-too-happy face of her mother.

  Grant nodded. “Yes, I’m planning to relocate to New York. There’s always a need for a demolition expert in the Big Apple, so I’m not worried about finding work.” He kissed Sam on the cheek and added with a mischievous grin, “Or I sit back and assume the role of trophy husband to my super-successful model girlfriend.”

  Everyone in the room laughed out loud, except for Mom, who wasn’t finished with her inquisition yet.

  “So when are we going to see you again?” she asked in true mother fashion.

  “Don’t worry, mom. We’re planning a six-week-long vacation in Sandy Beach during the summer and another two weeks at Christmas,” Grant said.

  Samantha chimed in, “Of course we’ll be driving the two days to get here because Grant doesn’t like to fly.”

  Bridget sighed, “Of course.”

  To herself: “I really hope you decide to have kids sooner rather than later. I want my grandkids while I’m still young enough to enjoy them.”

  Everyone broke out into laughter, because she’d spoken out loud that last thought.

  Allison almost choked on her food when she heard her mother’s wish, grateful when Reese diverted the attention from her by teasing Mom about being in such a hurry to become a grandma. If only she knew!

  The next morning Allison was scheduled to work at the souvenir shop again, but she was terribly sick. Now that she knew what was wrong with her, she understood why they called it “morning sickness,” and could only breathe slowly and hope her queasiness went away soon.

  She forced herself to go to work, because after having more than a week off, she couldn’t call in sick. She worked through the morning trying to deny the fact she was pregnant, but her morning sickness was a constant reminder.

  Her time in the land of denial would end soon. This wasn’t an issue that just went away. Sooner or later, she’d have to deal with it, just not now. And she needed to figure out a way to break it to her family. Preferably before she started to show.

  Sure, her mother eagerly awaited grandkids, but Allison was sure she hadn’t meant from her youngest daughter – who was still single.

  Chapter 22

  Russell needed answers. He called Grant, because Allison still didn’t answer her phone.

  “Hello?”

  “Grant, it’s Russell Barkin.”

  “Russell, what a surprise. How are you?”

  “I’m fine. And you? Your party was great, thanks again for inviting me.”

  “No worries, you’re almost family,” Grant responded and Russell ducked his head. If only he knew.

  “Hey, I was wondering if you knew how to get ahold of Allison?”

  “That’s strange. Did you need anything in particular? Maybe I can help?”

  You sure can. Haul her ass back to Chicago and make her answer to me.

  “Sorry, no. My clinic is interested in purchasing some of her paintings
.”

  “Did you try her cellphone?” Grant asked.

  “I did, but she doesn’t answer it. Perhaps she’s sick?”

  “That’s strange. I saw her yesterday at my parents’ house. She was fine. You might keep trying, and as soon as I see her, I’ll mention you’re trying to get in touch with her.”

  “That would be great. Sorry to bother you.”

  “No problem. Take care.”

  Russell hung up the phone, no wiser than before. He decided to go for a run to clear his head. While running, he decided he had to see her. That insecurity was driving him crazy. He needed to hear from her own lips why she’d taken off in such a hurry.

  Two days later, he’d finally cleared his schedule and could drive up to Sandy Beach. It was still early morning when he arrived at her apartment. At least her car was parked in front of the house; he might be lucky enough to meet her.

  When she opened the door she took one panicked look at him and tried to shut the door in his face. “Go away.”

  But Russell was faster. He put his foot into the door and pushed his way inside. “I think I deserve an explanation.” That didn’t work out the way he had planned it. He softened his voice: “Ally, please, talk to me.”

  “I don’t owe you an explanation.”

  “Yes, you do. You’re the one who showed up at my doorstep with that crazy relationship test idea.”

  “I told you, it was a mistake,” she said, starting to cry and breaking his heart once again.

  He wanted nothing more than to wrap her in his arms and console her, but when he stepped towards her, she backed away, wrapping her arms around her middle in a self-protective gesture.

  “Look, let’s sit down and talk about this,” he suggested.

  Allison stomped her foot. “No. I want you to leave. I didn’t invite you here and I want you gone.”

  “I’m not leaving without knowing what happened. Why did you leave? I thought we were doing great?”

  “You act like I owe you an explanation. I don’t. Leave us alone.”