Joelle's Secret

by Gilbert, Morris

  Joelle eagerly took it and gulped the cool water. “Thank you, Harry.”

  “Tell you what. I got some nice biscuits and some stew here. You set right there and let me wait on you.”

  “I can fix it.”

  “No, you can’t. You just let me do this now.”

  Joelle was pleased enough to let Harry wait on her for she still felt confused. He returned with a bowl of fragrant stew and a spoon. “Here, you take this, and I got some biscuits. You might want to crumble them up in there,” Harry said. He turned away and came back with a biscuit.

  She tasted the stew and said, “This is good.”

  “Well, that’s about the limit of my cooking, I guess. I can fry bacon and make stew.” He sat down beside her on the ground, his legs crossed and a curious light in his eyes. “Reckon I’ll have to know your name. Can’t go on calling you by that boy’s name.”

  “Well, actually a lot of people did call me Jo. My name’s Joelle Lynn Mitchell.”

  “Joelle? Why, that’s a right pretty name.”

  There was a sound of laughter from one of the wagons, and Joelle looked up. “I guess people are talking about me, aren’t they, Harry?”

  “Well, you know on a wagon train there ain’t a whole lot to talk about. So, something like this comes up—it’s just people’s nature.”

  “It’s something I had to do.”

  “Sure. We all have to do things like that. Get away from things, so to speak,” Harry said.

  Overhead the stars were beginning to appear, making tiny, brilliant dots in the sky. “Going to be a full moon tonight. Right pretty.”

  Joelle was grateful to Jump. “Aren’t you going to ask me anymore questions?”

  “Reckon you’ll tell me when you get ready. I’m not one to poke around other people’s business much. Anyways, you’re gonna be all right soon. The doctor tells me that that bullet missed your lung. You’re lucky there. Could have been a heck of a lot worse.”

  “I know it. I’m really thankful.” She was quiet for a while, and then she said, “I had to run away from my home, Harry.”

  She told how her stepfather had driven her to run away, and then related how she had gotten the idea of disguising herself as a boy. She ended by saying, “I hated to do it, but I was afraid I’d get caught.”

  “Why, don’t you worry none about that, Joelle. You’re gonna be all right. After you get to California that no-account stepfather of yours ain’t going to come two thousand miles to get you. If he does, I’ll perforate him.”

  Joelle smiled. “I hope it doesn’t come to that, Jump, but I appreciate it.” She felt a sense of warmth at the easy way Harry Jump had accepted her. However, her mind kept returning to Owen, and she wondered why he was gone.

  Finally Harry said, “I’ve got to go take over the herd. You be all right here by yourself?”

  “I’ll be all right, Harry.”

  “I’ll put this stew and these biscuits right here. You get them anytime you get hungry.”

  “Thank you, Harry.”

  Joelle waited as Jump mounted his horse and rode into the darkness. The sounds of the camp were the same as always— laughter, shouts, and off-key singing. She ate another biscuit with honey and was surprised at her keen appetite. Overhead the moon was beginning to light up the skies, and she watched it for a time. She grew sleepy after a while, and she pulled a blanket from the wagon, wrapped it around her, and returned to the fire. She put more sticks on it, and after a while lay down flat on her back and stared up at the skies. Finally she drifted into a fitful sleep. She was awakened by a voice, and frightened, she sat up. The sudden move brought pain to her upper shoulder, and she let out a small cry.

  “Well, you’re upright, are you?”

  Chad sat down beside her. The fire was going down, but the moonlight was bright. He pushed his hat back, and she saw he was smiling. “How you feeling?”

  “I’m much better, Chad.”

  “The doc said you wouldn’t have to worry any. He says you’re going to be fine. Hurts to get shot though. I been shot twice. Didn’t enjoy either time.”

  “We’ve got some stew here. I can heat it up.”

  “Why, I am pretty hungry, but you let me do the heating.” Chad moved quickly to put the pot back over the fire, fed the blaze with a few sticks, and picked up a spoon and began to stir. “You cook this?”

  “No, Harry did it. It’s good though, and there are some biscuits in that oven over there and some honey.”

  “I always like to have my dessert first,” Chad said cheerfully. He extracted a biscuit from the oven, split it open with his fingers, and poured honey over it. “Mighty messy, honey is, but mighty good.” He chewed thoughtfully, then began telling her how the day had gone, and she knew he was talking to put her at ease. He ate a bowl of the stew. “That’s mighty good. Harry’s a good cook.”

  “Chad, I want to tell you what I’m doing here and why I dressed myself up as a boy.”

  “Why, you don’t have to do that.”

  “I want to,” Joelle said hurriedly. She gave him her name and told the story.

  “That skunk ought have been shot!” he said edgily. “Don’t worry about him. If he ever comes after you, I’ll send him back in a basket.”

  Somehow the big man’s encouragement meant a lot to Joelle, as had Harry’s. “I don’t know what to do, Chad,” she said. “I don’t know how to act anymore.”

  “Well, why don’t you let me make some decisions. I’m mighty good at making other people’s decisions,” he said with a smile. “Tell you what I’m going to do. We’re going to get you a dress; you’re going to put on some makeup and join the world. Show them you’re a real woman.”

  “I don’t even have a dress.”

  “Well, make one, steal one, buy one. Tell you what. I’ll get one from that Cherry girl. You’re about the same size.”

  “I don’t think I could do that, Chad.”

  “Sure you can. Just put your head down and run right at it.”

  Suddenly, to her horror, she felt sadness and regret. She struggled, but the sound of tears in her voice gave her away. Chad put his long arms around her and said, “Now, Joelle, let me tell you. You’re a good-looking woman. I guess every man in the train must have been blind not to see it, but you’re going to dress yourself up, and every single man on this train will come courting you, including me and Owen Majors.”

  Joelle felt comfort and relief. Chad’s strong arm held her tight, and although she had never needed a man’s consolation before, she needed it now. She simply sat there as Chad continued talking, mostly teasing her. Finally he stood up.

  “You mind what I say. We’re going to dress you up so you’re going to be prettier than a pair of green shoes with red laces. I have to git now. Thanks for the stew.”

  Joelle realized she was fully awake. She didn’t know what time it was, but the moon was high in the sky. She heated the stew and ate another small portion and another biscuit. As she drew the blanket around her, she wondered how she would face Owen. That was what hurt her the most. I can’t even think about what to tell him. She felt lonely and confused for a long time.

  She dozed, but the sound of a horse awakened her. Owen was dismounting. He tied the horse and stopped when he saw her sitting beside the fire. “Well, you’re up. How do you feel?”

  “The doctor said I was fine. Just be a few days.”

  “Well, that’s good.” His words were terse, and he studied her with a troubling expression.

  “I—I want to talk to you, Owen.”

  “All right.” He didn’t sit down.

  “I want to tell you why I dressed up like a boy.”

  “You don’t have to tell me.”

  His words discouraged her. She knew he was angry with her, but she plunged ahead. “My name is Joelle Mitchell,” she said quickly. “I had a bad stepfather. When my mother died, he—he kept after me. He was going to make me marry him, he said, so I had to get away. I ran off, Ow
en, but I knew he’d find me so I dressed up like a boy, and I’ve been running ever since.”

  Owen stared at her, and his expression changed. “Why didn’t you tell me? You couldn’t trust me with it?”

  “I—I was afraid.”

  “I wish you would have told me, but you don’t have to worry.”

  “That’s what Harry and Chad said. That he would never come all the way to California to get me.” The strain was tell ing on her, and she felt weak. “I need to lie down. Will you help me get into the wagon?”

  “Sure.” He helped her to her feet, and when they got to the wagon, he simply picked her up by the waist and set her inside. “I’m sorry about your trouble,” he said.

  “Others have worse. Thank you, Owen. I’m tired. I think I’ll go to sleep.”

  “The doc left some laudanum here. You want some of that?”

  “No, I don’t think so. I believe I can rest without it. Good night, Owen.”

  “Good night.”

  He started to say more, but she moved back into the wagon and drew the canvas cover over the end. Joelle still felt more alone than ever.

  * * *

  “WELL, WE FOUND US some buffalo,” Chad said. “I don’t want to shoot ’em this far from camp. They’re pesky to haul.”

  “Tell you what, Chad. We’ll drive some of them over toward the train. How about that?”

  “OK.”

  Chad and Owen had been looking for game and were pleased to find a small herd of buffalo. They were a long way from camp, too far to haul an entire carcass, so the plan to drive them close to the camp made sense to both.

  The two had not spoken of Joelle, but now Chad, who had been waiting for Owen to speak of the girl, said, “Joelle’s going to be fine. That shot could have done a lot of damage.”

  “Yeah, I’m glad of that.”

  Something in Owen’s tone drew Chad’s glance. “What’s the matter with you? You look like you’re mad at her.”

  “Well, I just don’t like to be lied to.”

  “Well, don’t you know why she was dressed up like a boy?”

  “Yes, she told me.”

  “I think it was pretty gritty of her. Don’t be a fool, Owen. She’s tough. She did what she had to do. And besides that, she’s good-looking. I think all of us are idiots for not seeing that.”

  “Logan Temple knew it.”

  “Well, he’s got a closer eye than most of us.”

  “She shouldn’t have deceived me, Chad.”

  “You’re a fool, Owen! She’s a fine girl. Anybody can see that.” He suddenly grinned rashly. “Why, I’m going to court her myself. I’ve said all the time I need a wife. She’d make a pretty good one.”

  Owen gave him a tense look and shook his head. “You come up with some crazy ideas, Chad. Let’s get that buffalo back to camp.”

  * * *

  THE TWO HUNTERS HAD driven the buffalo back to camp, and Chad killed it. The other men came out and at once began cutting up the animal. Afterward, they cooked steaks, and an unannounced meeting was called.

  “What’s this all about, Ralph?” Owen asked.

  Ogden shifted his weight. “Riker wants to take a shortcut to get to the gold camp.”

  “We better not. Shortcuts can get us into trouble.”

  “Well, he’s asked for a meeting, and I’ll have to let him have it.”

  The three men approached where a crowd had already gathered. Riker had already been talking. “I’ve been telling these folks just what I told you, Ralph. We can save four hundred miles by taking this shortcut.”

  “We don’t know anything about that shortcut.”

  “We know it’s shorter,” Riker insisted. He was a forceful man, always convinced he was totally right. He had the eyes of a fanatic, and now he turned to Owen and said, “You’re the guide here. You ever been over that trail?”

  “I haven’t, but it’s been tried.”

  “Well, it can be done, can’t it?”

  “Some folks named Donner tried it, and they couldn’t make it. They lost their wagons. Got caught in the winter. Turned to eating each other.”

  “Well, it ain’t wintertime. I heard about that, but this is the right time of the year.”

  Chad pointed out that they’d have to cross very difficult territory on the shortcut. “Some of the wagons won’t make it, I can tell you that right now.”

  Riker could not stand being crossed. “I may just split the party and take them who wants to get to California in a hurry and go on.”

  “You do as you please,” Ralph said, tired of the argument. “I’m not leading the folks into anything that dangerous.”

  Owen spoke up then. “The Indians are thicker in that region. With a small group of wagons you’d just be asking to get yourself scalped.”

  The meeting went on for some time, but in the end Ralph said, “The train’s going on. Anybody who wants to split does it on their own responsibility. Meeting’s over.”

  Riker was angry, but he knew he had no choice. He turned and stamped away. Logan Temple had been watching him. He neither liked nor trusted the man. He turned and was stopped by Dora Patton, one of the dance hall girls, who had been sick. Nothing serious, but she came up beside him now and said, “Well, Doctor, you going to make a visit to one of your patients?”

  “There’s nothing wrong with you, Dora. You’re as healthy as I am.”

  “Well, maybe I just want a good-looking man like you to pay me some attention.”

  “You won’t have any trouble,” he smiled. Dora was a small brunette with a pleasing figure and was constantly pursued by the men on the train. Temple knew the dangers of a woman like this. “You’re healthy as you can be, Dora.”

  Cherry came over and said, “Leave him alone, Dora.”

  “All right, but he just looked lonesome to me.”

  Cherry laughed. “Are you lonesome, Doctor?”

  “No more than anybody else, I guess.”

  “Tell me, Logan. Do you enjoy good-looking patients like Dora there and Edith?”

  “Oh, all patients look alike to me.”

  She laughed shortly, her eyes dancing. “I doubt that. How’s that girl doing? What’s her name?”

  “Her name is Joelle Mitchell. She’s fine. The bullet hit high and missed anything vital. Didn’t get infected so she’s going to be all right.”

  “Did she tell you why she dressed up like a boy?”

  “I couldn’t say about that.”

  “You doctors! Better stay away from Dora. Women like her—and like me—aren’t what you need.”

  “You’re all right, Cherry. You’re just on the wrong road.”

  “Well, if you’re going to start preaching, I’m going to let you go.”

  Logan smiled and said, “All right. I’ve got to wash some clothes. Mine will stand up alone.”

  He collected some of his clothes and started for the river. He had gone only a few feet in that direction when he found Artie and Edith Riker headed for the river. “Guess we’re all going to wash some things out.”

  Artie was carrying a huge load. “I guess so. How’s that girl doing?”

  “She’s fine. Her name is Joelle.”

  “That’s a right pretty name.”

  Once at the river, Edith said, “I’ll wash the clothes. Thanks for carrying them, Artie.”

  “I’ll come back and help you tote ’em to the wagon.” He left and walked along the river, stopping to throw a rock every now and then. Edith watched him go.

  “He’s the best of the three,” Edith said. “His mother must have been a fine woman.”

  “His mother?”

  “Yes, didn’t you know? Sid and Clyde have another mother. Lyman had a second wife. Artie was her son.”

  “I didn’t know that. He’s different from the other two.”

  She watched as he began washing the clothes awkwardly. “You haven’t washed many clothes, I can see.”

  “No, I try to stay away from things l
ike that.”

  The two worked silently for a time, and finally she asked, “What about that girl Joelle? Is she all right really?”

  “Well, she’s all right physically, but she’s got her problems.”

  “Don’t we all.”

  Logan looked at the woman. “I guess we do,” he said.

  She was silent for a time, and then she said, “Do you miss your drinking, Logan?”

  “No, I don’t—which surprises me. I don’t know why I did it. Just lack of sense, I guess.”

  “What will you do when you get to California?”

  “Be a doctor. What about you?”

  “Nothing exciting. I wish—” She suddenly broke off, and he saw she was troubled.

  “What is it you wish?”

  “Oh, nothing. Wishing is about all I’ve done lately.”

  He touched her hand. It was cold with the waters of the river, but there was warmth in this woman, and he suddenly knew that he was drawn to her as he could not ever remember being drawn to a woman. She looked at him with surprise but didn’t attempt to withdraw her hand. They were silent.

  “What do you want, Logan?”

  He amazed himself when he said, “I want you, Edith.”

  “You can’t have me.”

  “I don’t know much about love, but I feel something for you that I’ve never felt for another woman.”

  “It’s too late,” she said. “We’d have to hide, live a lie. Could you do that?”

  “I don’t know. I never had to.” She was watching him steadily, and he saw something in her eyes he couldn’t understand. Finally he said, “Well, I guess we’d better get the clothes washed.”

  She, however, still was thinking about what he had said. He wants me, but it’s too late for us.

  * * *

  ARTIE WAS SURPRISED TO find Jennie Pickett at the river. As always, he was shy around her. She seemed to have blossomed even more during the journey. “Hi, Jennie.”

  “Hello, Artie. What are you doing?”

  “Oh, I helped Ma take some clothes down. She didn’t want me to help her wash them. What are you doing here?”