What to Read After FSOG: The Gemstone Collection (WTRAFSOG Book 9)

by Kristine Cayne

“Breathe,” Randy instructed. His brown eyes were full of compassion and worry. “There you go. Color’s coming back to your face. You can do this, baby.”

  “I can do this,” she repeated, then blinked, shaking her head. “No, I don’t think I can.”

  “Blaine. If Frederic makes it out alive, I don’t think he’s going to let all of this go. He’s vengeful. What’s he going to do, especially after coming to town and getting his ass kicked? Is he going to just walk away? I don’t know for sure, but I don’t think he will. I don’t like the sounds of this guy, and I don’t like the crap he’s been doing to you. I know this is very exposing, but you have to make sure it stops. Walk in there with me, and let’s show them these articles.”

  “I-”

  “What if he blackmails you? What if it goes viral? Right now it’s just on those sites, but what if-”

  “It’s going to go viral if I do say something!” she snapped. That did it. But he had a point, and it scared the hell out of her. Sucking in a deep breath, then slowly breathing out, Blaine nodded. “Let’s go,” she grumbled.

  “Don’t be upset with me, I just wanted to-”

  “Just go!” She wasn’t upset with him, but if Randy didn’t move this damn truck now, she might go into another bout of anxiety.

  Without another word, he put the truck in gear and headed back to the road.

  I shouldn’t have snapped at him.

  Her chest tightened, making it hard to breathe again.

  All I have to do is walk in there, tell them Frederic sold tapes of me that I’d never consented to him taping, and walk out.

  Would it make the news? Would it go national news?

  Her hand hurt. Blaine realized she’d balled it into a tight fist. She couldn’t focus. Tears of anger blurred her vision. Between that and the bright sunlight, her eyes hurt.

  Randy stopped the truck again. He cleared his throat. Blaine felt his hand on her knee. “We’re here.”

  She nodded. Before she could say anything, Randy was out of the truck and by her side. Her legs trembled as she climbed out, and Randy reached out to steady her.

  “Let me grab the magazines.” Keeping his left hand on her shoulder, Randy scooted around he to scoop up the magazines, then shoved the door closed with his foot. “I’ve got you,” he promised, brushing his lips against her temple.

  Hand in hand, they walked into the police station. Everything felt like a blur, but Blaine managed to tell them about her marriage to Frederic, and the newly discovered news that he’d recorded them having sex without her even knowing it and had sold the video to sites on-line.

  Blaine went on an OCD-like manic cleaning spree that night when the newscast had more stories about Frederic and her. Of course, just as she thought, the “tapes” were brought up. Damn it! She’d darted to the bathroom and sunk to the floor, feeling sick. Then she picked herself up and cleaned. After the cleaning was done, she looked for other things to do.

  Currently she stood on the stepladder, hammering a nail harder than she should have to hang up a picture in her room. The sound of someone at the door startled her and she missed the nail, hitting her thumb instead. “Ow! Damn it!” she screamed, startled. Of course, that led to her slipping back and falling off the step stool. As her foot went at an awkward angle beneath her, another cry rippled from her lips. The knocking continued. No one was home. Melody was at the inn working, Jameson at the station and Mom probably with Chet.

  “If you’re from the news looking for a story, I wish the hammer hit you instead,” she muttered, trying to ease herself up from the floor. Her foot throbbed as well as her thumb and head. The knocking stopped and her phone rang. Okay, so whoever was here was someone she knew. Blaine crawled across the floor to reach for her phone. Randy’s number registered on the caller ID. For a split second, she wanted to ignore him, but she’d bet he was outside right now, and knowing that he knew her state of mind, he probably wouldn’t leave her alone. She hit answer.

  “I know you’re in there, Blaine. I need to know you’re okay. I brought your bear.” His voice was filled with concern.

  “I’d get up, but I managed to slam a hammer on my thumb, then fall off a step ladder. I’m kind of sore at the moment.”

  She heard a jiggle.

  “Good thing the door’s unlocked.”

  She was about to say something until she realized he’d hung up the phone. She heard his footsteps and then he appeared in the doorway with her green bear in hand. He set it on her bed, then sat beside her.

  “What’s with you always seeing me at my worst?” she grumbled as he reached out for her good hand. “I should have locked the door.”

  “Well at least you’re still talking to me, even if you’re complaining. Maybe you should have, but it’s too late now.” Dark brown eyes searched her face. “It smells like bleach in here. What have you been doing?” As careful as he could, Randy helped her up. Still reeling from the pain in her foot, Blaine stumbled forward. Randy caught her with ease. They both sat at the edge of her bed.

  She shrugged, fighting back the anger. “I needed something to do, otherwise I’d throw something at the TV when the news came on. I told Mom, Jameson and Melody to go on with their day. They all wanted to take off work to stay with me. Jameson’s so pissed at Frederic…”

  “Hell, we’re all pissed at that jerk! The best thing maybe is to not watch the news. You knew what they were going to say.” His touch was loving when he ran a hand up her arm. “Don’t drive yourself crazy. It’s going to blow over.” His words didn’t provide much comfort. “I think if you don’t object, I’m going to put the tools and ladder in the garage, grab an ice pack for your foot and keep you company so you don’t do anything crazy again.”

  “What if I do object?” She wouldn’t, of course. Randy’s company was more than welcome. She just didn’t want to clue him in and give him that satisfaction yet. He’d been there the whole time earlier, holding her hand and being a good friend when she told the cops what they’d come across. Her stomach knotted the entire time. She wasn’t sure the next step in terms of what happens. Hopefully they’d get those videos off the sites immediately. She couldn’t even get herself to look at them to find out how bad they really were. Did it matter? The fact that her jerk ex-husband could expose her like that without batting an eye…

  The emotional abuse was bad. The constant working had been tiring. The ignoring her as a wife hurt like hell. But the tapes crossed into a whole new territory, and she wanted the asshole to pay. Sometimes she wished she’d been the one to hit him, but she wouldn’t say those thoughts out loud.

  “I’m really hoping you don’t.” Randy stood, reaching for the ladder. He looked back at her before picking up the hammer. “You can let someone take care of you a little, Blaine.” He didn’t give her a chance to respond. He left the room already.

  The bear he’d won her caught her eye and she reached for it. The silly stuffed animal signified so much. Frederic never did things like that. He’d never checked on her when she was sick. He’d never called her or texted her to find out how her day was. He never sat by her side and pleaded with her to talk when so much was going on. He’d never been a real husband.

  She’d worked side by side with the man for years. She’d loved him, but hated him at the same time. Day by day as she lived a life she was unhappy with, her dreams, her emotions, everything that resembled the old Blaine washed away. She had no one to blame but herself.

  As promised, Randy returned with an ice pack. She’d already slipped out of her shoes and cringed at the purple bruising and swelling. It matched her thumb. The icepack numbed her foot, but she flinched as he applied pressure.

  “Wanna talk about what you’re feeling?” Randy asked, holding the pack in place. His eyes lit up as he realized she held the bear against her chest.

  “Not really.” Not if he wanted to know how she felt about the tapes or the news. No, she’d already made it clear how she felt. Part of her wished her emotion
s were as numb as her foot was starting to feel.

  “Okay,” he said simply.

  Well that was easy. He wasn’t going to pressure her? Randy was really just going to sit there with her in silence, hold the ice to her foot, and be content?

  “If you could go back in time and do one thing over, what would it be?” Blaine blurted, finally getting sick of the silence after awhile.

  “Honestly?” He raised his head.

  She nodded.

  “I’d have told you how I felt a long time ago. Maybe I could have been the one to help you find your dreams. Maybe then you wouldn’t have felt like you needed to run so far from home to find yourself and end up in this nightmare.”

  “Why me?” she blurted. Did it really matter why her?

  Letting go of the ice pack, Randy moved up and took her hands in his, being careful of her thumb. “Why you? Why not you?”

  She could think of many reasons why not her, but for once, she chose to shut up and her mouth worked with her instead of against her.

  “You’re beautiful, confident-”

  “I have to stop you right there. I’ve never been that confident.”

  “Really? I never would have guessed,” Randy said seriously.

  “Hell, Randy! Why do you think I left? I was surrounded by people who knew what they wanted. I felt like I should have known my passion. My brother was into music early on. Avery was too. I always thought you knew what you wanted. I felt like the oddball. I hid my lack of confidence by being sarcastic and came off confrontational. Inside I was insecure. And once again, I don’t know why the hell I keep telling you this stuff!”

  He laughed. “Told you I have that way about me.”

  “Yeah, and I’m trapped, too.” She pointed at her throbbing ankle. “Not sure how good I can run with a bruised ankle and thumb.”

  “So don’t run,” Randy said softly.

  “I find myself not wanting to run from you, but to you instead,” Blaine admitted. “I’m not ready for this.”

  “I’ll be here when you are.” He leveled her with a heated gaze, intense eyes full of love, and it scared her. She wanted to give in, be with Randy and see where it went, but she didn’t know how to stop putting up that wall. If she put it up too high or for too long, would he really still be there?

  Chapter Eighteen

  The weekdays flew by. Randy barely slept as he kept fielding phones calls, talking to the police, and waited impatiently for Frederic to come out of it so he could tell everyone who the hell hit him. There were days it looked grim, but the man was still holding on by a thread.

  Blaine started her job with the newspaper midweek. She put up her wall and blocked everyone out, stepped up her professional face and pretended like she wasn’t in the midst of the news herself. Randy heard rumor after rumor during the day, all whispering about Blaine and the things she was supposedly into. The cops couldn’t do anything more than look into it because Frederic was still in a state of not being able to talk.

  Randy didn’t know if she was upset with him for pushing her to go or not, but she barely talked to him. After the night he’d dropped by and she’d opened up again, Randy figured maybe she wouldn’t put the wall up. He wanted a chance to talk to her this weekend, but she’d be going away with Avery and Melody. Band practice this week was awkward. Blaine avoided everyone completely.

  Looking at the time, he sighed in relief. The work week was finally over. He could log out of the computer and get the hell out of here. He saved his progress on what he was working on, bookmarked a few reference sites, and shut down the computer. Just as he pushed away from the desk in his rolling chair, someone cleared their throat behind him.

  His father stood there. “We’d like for you to get an exclusive with Blaine over this…” He waved his hands, trying to find the right words. “New ordeal. You could probably get the best insight.”

  Randy’s anger surged. “You want me to get Blaine to talk about everything for a news article? You’re seriously asking me this?”

  “You’re close to her. It might help clear your name, too.”

  His father really was serious about it.

  “Oh come on! You really want someone else to get this story?” his father said to him impatiently.

  “Hasn’t she been through enough?” Randy folded his arms over his chest.

  “If she gives everyone the truth, it’ll be over and done with before you know it. Son, you’re under suspicion for attempted murder on her ex. You’ve got some sort of relationship going on with her. Think about it, Randy. I came to you with this because I know you’d give the best perspective and you can get her to talk.” With that, his dad walked away as if the conversation were casual.

  He grabbed his stuff and hightailed it the hell out of the office. As he stepped outside, he spotted Blaine heading for her car. He had no idea she was still even around. She didn’t even notice him, so Randy took the chance and ran over to catch up with her.

  “Avoiding me?” he asked as he stood in front of her. “You haven’t said much to me all week. You don’t even listen in on our band practice.”

  “Ahh!” she shrieked, dropping her keys. “You scared me!”

  He bent to pick them up. As he handed them to her, their fingers connected and he felt the usual tingly spark. God, he missed her touch. He missed holding her and kissing her. “Didn’t mean to.” He had so many things he wanted to say. I miss you. I love you. Don’t push me away. Things he felt, but couldn’t get them to come out right now. Maybe that was best. He hoped she hadn’t heard the conversation just now between him and Dad. “Have you eaten? Wanna grab some dinner with me?”

  Blaine’s lips parted, and he could already tell they were ready to form the word no.

  Randy stepped closer and touched her elbow gently. “You’re putting your wall up again. I thought we were past that.”

  She shrugged, looking away. “It’s what I do.” Her tone was flat.

  “I know that’s what you do. You always have. Don’t you know you don’t have to do that with me?” She was hurting and he knew it. He couldn’t imagine how it felt to be her, to have herself exposed like that without even knowing those things were being done. She looked like she hadn’t been eating much. “Come on, let me take you to dinner. My treat. You don’t even have to talk to me. Just keep me company and eat.”

  Blaine laughed. “Really? I could sit there, eat and not say a thing to you? What would you do, have a two sided conversation with yourself?”

  Yes! He’d made her laugh. He had a shot after all. Playing coy, Randy shrugged. “Why not? I could probably do a good impersonation of you.”

  “This I have to see.” She finally met his gaze, and her eyes lit up a little. “Fine, you win. I’ll have dinner with you.”

  “I guess I should threaten to talk to myself more often.” Randy slipped his hand through hers.

  “Don’t let it go to your big head,” Blaine shot back. “I’m just hungry, you’re paying, and the entertainment could come in handy.”

  Blaine wasn’t sure, but it felt like everyone was staring at her and Randy. They’d decided to take a short walk to a nearby place so they could get back to their vehicles afterwards with easy access. The town square was still abuzz with people, and she swore every one of them pointed, whispered, and stared.

  She’d felt like that all week.

  Did they all go and get a peek of the videos? Were they laughing at her expense? At one time, she wasn’t the kind to care what people thought. She’d grown out of that. Right now, she was going backwards because she cared. She wanted to scream and tell everyone to mind their own business. She’d never felt so damn exposed! If Frederic wasn’t hanging on for his life, she’d hunt his horrible butt down and kill him herself.

  Ugh, she had to get those thoughts out of her mind, now!

  And Randy. Poor guy. He was trying, and Blaine knew she pushed away this week. She’d put that wall right back up for everyone. Randy, Jameson, her mom.
She just didn’t want to talk. After the police station that day, she had to go home and tell her family even more screwed up news and she felt sick the whole while. Jameson, bless his heart, he wanted to go find Frederic himself and make him pay. Mom cried. Melody didn’t even know what to say and just gave Blaine a comforting hug.

  Blaine scooted into a booth, sliding her hand across the leather seating. The lights were dim. Behind their table was a TV showing a baseball game. Blaine wasn’t even sure who was playing and she didn’t really care. Randy slid in across from her. Almost immediately, a waitress came over to take their order.

  “Blaine Grant? Is that really you?” the woman asked, her voice shrill and excited.

  “Yeah, it’s really me.” Blaine stared at her, trying to place exactly who she was.

  “You probably don’t remember me. I went to high school with you, but I was always kinda under the radar. I’m Serena Jessup. I worked behind the scenes in drama class. I always loved your dance choreography. I was so excited to see you working with some big names.” She quieted down. “I’m so sorry about all the trouble with Frederic. I used to think he was the hottest thing, but he seems so snobby! You should have been leading and not just assisting. Do you plan on opening up a studio or something after, umm, all this blows over?”

  Blaine caught her lip between her teeth and soaked in the woman’s words. The name sounded slightly familiar. “I’m not sure. I think that part of my life might be done.”

  “Oh.” Serena’s face fell. “Sorry to hear that. I would have loved to work with you. Anyways, I’m sorry to bug you about all of this. I’m sure you just want a nice night for dinner and here I am bombarding you with things I’m sure you’re ready to forget about. What can I get for you two?”

  After they ordered and Serena walked away, Blaine stared at her retreating back, a little flabbergasted.

  “So when are y’all leaving?” Randy asked.

  “In the morning. Avery’s coming to pick Melody and I up. I’ll be back Sunday evening. Melody has to leave on Tuesday and she wants some time to get things together.”