Infinitely Mine (Incapable Part Three)

by Skye,Marie

“Where’d you get it?”

  Her head fell slightly forward, and I nipped her ear. “Um, a little boutique here.” Her breathing had gotten heavy as I continued rocking against her.

  “Was it recent?”

  “Hmm?”

  Normally I would’ve easily reprimanded her for making me repeat myself. All of these were answers I already knew. I knew about her entire week. I knew exactly what boutique she went to. I knew how she hesitated between two dresses, and, knowing her, she felt like she was wasting money. She hated spending money on herself. She felt it was wasteful. After she left, I went into the boutique to browse. The cost of the dress? On sale for half off, making it twenty dollars. She had hesitated over twenty dollars. I fucking loved her. I had bought six more in every color.

  I kissed her neck. “I said was it recent?”

  She nodded. “Two days ago.”

  “They should have more then.”

  “What?”

  Rip.

  Her gasp quickly turned into a moan as I pulled her bra down and latched onto a nipple while laying her back and tearing off the rest of her dress. “God, I’ve missed touching you.” She arched up as I bit the underside of her breast.

  “We’re supposed to be taking it slow,” she panted out.

  I chuckled. She was right. We should have been taking it slow, and probably no sex, not until we figured things out a little bit more, but oh, how I wanted to fuck her. But I couldn’t—not yet. She wasn’t ready. She wasn’t in the right headspace. I needed her mind here with me completely, and instead it was scattered. I needed all of her with me. She yelped as I ripped her panties off. I grabbed her and rolled her over until she was straddling me.

  “No sex, just skin on skin. I wanna feel your wet pussy sliding up and down my cock until you come.” She started moving her hips, slowly at first, until she fell into a rhythm. “That’s right baby, use me. I wanna feel you dripping all over me.” I moaned as she started going faster. I felt myself getting close.

  I reached up, teasing her nipples. “Make yourself come, baby.” I felt my balls starting to tighten, but I didn’t want to come without her. I pressed right above her pussy and she gasped, her eyes suddenly turning wild as she reached her peak and screamed out. Her juices glided over my cock in a rush, and the warmth and wetness sent me spiraling over the edge, coating my stomach. I let out a growl as I started to come, too. The only way it would’ve been better was if I had been inside her. I pulled her toward me until her body was flush against mine.

  “Good girl,” I praised in between kisses, and she laughed.

  “You kinda forced it out of me.”

  “I get what I want.” I reached over, grabbing my shirt to use as a towel to clean us up, then pulled her up. “I want you to know that wasn’t part of my plan tonight.” I guided her to the bedroom, suddenly eager to get her in my arms.

  She yawned. “Could’ve fooled me.”

  I pulled her closer. We at least had a start.

  Sunlight started to filter in, and Emmalin pressed up against me, making me hard and doing nothing for my self-control. She finally turned over, and we were facing each other.

  “Morning.”

  She gave me a soft smile. “Morning.”

  We were quiet as we just lay there, relishing in each other. It had been too damn long since we’d had that. “Do you have a lot of stuff?”

  She looked at me in confusion. “You mean at my apartment?”

  I nodded. “Yeah. I want to get you moved as soon as possible. I’ll make all the arrangements. You don’t even need to pack.”

  She slowly sat up. “Grayson, I live here. And my job…”

  “You can come back to my company, you know that, but you also know you don’t need to work Emmalin. You’re more than taken care of.”

  She scooted away, and I resisted the urge to pull her back to me. “The café I work at is more than just a job, Grayson. I like it. I’ve been helping with the financial aspects for about two months now. They were suffering, and I helped pull them through. The owner is out on medical leave, and I was actually…” She stared down at her hands a moment before turning her attention back to me. “They asked if I would consider a partnership, and I’m really thinking about it. I know it doesn’t look like much, but it wasn’t doing so well, and I wanted to help, and now it looks like it would be a good opportunity.”

  I took a deep breath. My ventures were mainly based in Chicago. I had other expansions, but not here in Quincy. She looked thoughtful for a moment, then realization sunk in for me, she didn’t want to come back with me.

  She pulled the sheet tighter around her, cutting off any physical contact. “I think I like it here.”

  I sat up, trying to think through how we could make this work. She wanted to stay here. I hated it here. It was too far from everyone we knew.

  “I’ll buy it.”

  She looked at me wide eyed and shook her head.

  “Yes. I’ll buy it. The original owner can maintain all aspects of the business.”

  “I don’t want that, Grayson, you know that.”

  I ran my hand through my hair. “So, what then? We said we were going to fight for each other, but you want to what? Have a long-distance relationship? That’s out of the question.”

  “I never made a formal decision on purchasing, but I at least want to stay on board until the owner is better. It’s just a few more weeks Grayson.” I got up, needing to move around. “This could be good for us. It could help us grow and strengthen our relationship.”

  I held up my hand, all of a sudden disgusted. “Why are you talking as if you read all of that from a book?” She didn’t meet my eyes, but she slowly got up, the bed sheet still wrapped around her. I stared at her, but I couldn’t figure her out. She said she wanted to take it slow. Fine, I could do that, but something was off. She was hiding something again.

  I walked over to her, and she gazed up at me as she held the bed sheet tight against her. “Talk to me.”

  She cupped my face in her hands. “It’s just for a little while Grayson, I promise, just like I promised them.”

  I exhaled sharply. “I’ll make us some breakfast.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Grayson

  Long distance. What the fuck is that? I glanced down at the bowl of eggs I was taking my anger out on. I poured them in the pan and began stirring. I had an open kitchen, so I was able to see Emmalin enter the living room. She picked up her dress, which I had torn in half last night, and frowned.

  I had just poured the eggs into plates, and I leaned over the kitchen island, watching her with an amused grin as she attempted to turn her dress back into a dress. She was struggling—hard.

  I went to the bedroom and came back out with one of the dresses I’d bought at the boutique. “Try this.” I kissed the back of her neck as I placed the dress in front of her.

  She shook her head as she held the dress out in front of her. “Should I ask why you have the exact same dress I wore last night, but in a different color, or do I not want to know?”

  I grabbed our plates off the island, bringing them into the living room. “You looked beautiful in it, and I’m sorry I ripped it.”

  She scowled. “No you’re not.”

  I laughed. “Yeah, you’re right about that.” I motioned toward her plate. “Eat. Speaking of, you’ve lost a lot of weight. What’s going on?”

  She sighed as she stabbed at her eggs. “I’m just not always hungry, and I was…”

  I waited for her to continue, but she didn’t. “You were what?” I urged her on.

  She set down her half-eaten plate of food before looking me in the eyes. “I’m just, not hungry I guess. I’ll try to do better. I’m busy a lot. I’ll do better. I promise.”

  She stopped talking as she shut her eyes. As she did so, I took a good look at her. She was in pain. She finally opened her eyes, and she gave me a smile that was absolutely fake. “I should get going.” I grabbed my keys. We we
ren’t anywhere closer to figuring anything out. If anything, we had taken five steps back.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Emmalin

  The ride to my apartment was quiet as I stared out the window. Finally, he slowed down in front of my building. “You don’t belong here,” he whispered. It was almost inaudible. I swallowed the lump forming in my throat.

  “Where do I belong?”

  I jumped as his hand banged the steering wheel. “In my arms, in my life, not hours away trying to make me hate you!”

  “Grayson, I—”

  “Don’t ask questions if you don’t want the truth Emmalin. Stop evading. You said we could talk. I’m talking.”

  I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I needed just a little more time, and then I would be better. I would be the Emmalin he fell in love with, not this depressed shell. Christ, I couldn’t even tell him I loved him without wanting to break down.

  “It’s just for a little while Grayson, then I’ll be home.”

  He wiped the tear that had fallen and sighed. “I didn’t want to go home without you. I said I wouldn’t, and now I have to.”

  “We have weekends.” I smiled, trying to offer some kind of reassurance. He grunted, looking out the window. He finally sighed before looking back at me.

  “Six weeks. Six weeks, and then you’re home. With me.”

  I nodded, hoping I would be completely okay by then. I had to be. I didn’t have a choice. “Six weeks,” I repeated back to him.

  He shut his eyes, looking pained, before abruptly opening his car door and coming around to my side. We walked slowly to the front door. “If I don’t leave now, I won’t leave at all.” He pulled me to him, clutching me tightly. “I fucking love you, you know that?”

  I nodded, trying to keep the tears from falling. He kissed me as if his life depended on it, and I kissed him back as if mine did, too.

  Because my life had to depend on something.

  “Did you expect him to come back?”

  I took a deep breath, and slowly let it out. I let my eyes wander around the room for a bit, obviously stalling for an answer, but of course, he was patient with me, like he always was. I cleared my throat.

  “Honestly no. I thought…” I let my words fade away. “I don’t know what I thought. I guess I thought he would be with her, living their new life together.”

  “But they’re not?”

  I shook my head. “No, apparently they’re not.”

  “I see.” I watched as he wrote something down on this tablet. “Did you ask him?”

  I shrunk farther down in my chair. “No. I think he’ll tell me when he’s ready.”

  “What else did you talk about?”

  I sighed, thinking about the last few days with Grayson, and the days since he’d left. “We were both angry.”

  “That’s to be expected. It didn’t end well.”

  I picked at the lint on my pants. “I think we agreed to try things slow, and take it from there.”

  “You think you agreed? Did you agree?”

  “Kind of. I agreed to it. Him not so much. That’s what we fought about.”

  “Do you want to be in a relationship with Grayson?”

  My head snapped up. “Of course I do. I’ve always wanted to be with him.”

  It was quiet for a moment as I stared down at my hands.

  “Did you tell him about us?”

  I smirked. “No. I told him I was here due to work.”

  “So you’re starting off your relationship by lying…again?” He continued to scribble on his tablet. I hated that damn tablet. I wanted to take that tablet and throw it against the fucking wall. I took a calming deep breath and counted to five. Nope. I still wanted to take that tablet and throw it against the fucking wall. Yeah…maybe we should talk about increasing my meds while I’m here.

  I threw my hands up. “I’m not…lying, per se. I’m just not exactly ready to share this part of my life with him.” I could feel the tears threatening to push through. Dammit. “I’m embarrassed.”

  “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about, Emmalin.”

  “Oh, I’m very embarrassed about it, because I want to say I didn’t mean to do it, but I can’t say that without admitting that I’m lying. I knew what I was doing, but I stopped it.” The tears were now pouring down, and I reached for the Kleenex that was handed to me.

  “You needed help, Emmalin. It’s okay to admit that. And you’re doing better—a lot better. Don’t think for one second someone is going to look down on you for admitting that you needed help. The statistics for those that don’t ask for help are staggering, and unfortunately those are the ones that succeed at suicide. Your suicidal ideation stemmed from everything going on in your life, and you finally couldn’t take it anymore. I’m proud of you for seeking help, and Grayson will be, too.”

  I smiled as I wiped a tear away and nodded. “Thank you, Dr. Adams.”

  He nodded as he typed something on his tablet. “I would say continue out your sessions with me. I can recommend a good therapist for you to see in Chicago, of course. I do encourage you to have a session at least once a week, just for a few months, until you’re more acclimated to your new surroundings. Then you can taper off.”

  He handed me a card. “If you feel like you’re having any triggers, the first step is to take a step back and assess your situation. What’s causing you to be in that situation, and to think those thoughts again? Talk it out with someone you can trust, someone who will listen. As you know, I’m available day or night.” I grabbed my bag and headed for the door. “Thank you for seeing me tonight, Emmalin. I appreciate that you’re keeping up with our schedule.”

  “Thank you. I’ll see you soon.”

  By the time I got home and turned my phone back on, I had eight texts and two missed calls from Grayson. I dialed his number, and he answered on the first ring.

  “Hey. I was starting to worry. I was two seconds from coming back down there.”

  I smiled as I got in bed. “Sorry about that. I had my phone off while I ran some errands. How was your day?”

  He sighed. “Long. I’m severely behind on a lot of stuff from being out of the country.” He paused. “Tell me again why you’re not here with me?”

  My eyes started to tear up. Oh, how I wanted to be there with him, but not yet. “Soon.” My attempts at reassuring him were horrible.

  “So, this weekend, I’ve been invited to a production that Abby’s having. I would really like you to come.”

  I immediately tensed at the mention of his family. I nervously swallowed. “Um…I don’t know Grayson,” I whispered.

  “Emmalin, we said weekends were to be spent together.”

  I felt myself starting to break out in a cold sweat. “I know Grayson, I remember. It’s just that…” I hadn’t prepared myself to see his family. Dr. Adam’s and I hadn’t talked about me being back in their lives. The mention of Abby’s name sent a flurry of panic through my system. “It’s just, I don’t know if it’s a good idea to see them.”

  He let out long sigh. “They love you, Emmalin. You know that.”

  I looked down, and it was only then that I noticed the blood dripping from my hand. My hand was in such a tight fist, my nails had pierced the skin. I muttered a curse and grabbed a towel.

  “Emmalin? Everything okay?”

  “Yeah. I just…” Talk everything out. “I cut myself by accident, it’s fine.” It was talking, even if I downplayed it.

  “I don’t like this, being apart. I want to see you.”

  “We can video chat.”

  “Not the same Emmalin, and you know it.” He was quiet a minute. “I need you.” I heard him sigh, and my heart cracked. I needed him too. “Maybe I can cut the trip short and fly back to see you.”

  “You don’t have to do that. I don’t want you to tire yourself out. That’s too much Grayson.”

  “Get some rest, we’ll talk in the morning. I love you.”

  “Goodni
ght Grayson.”

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Emmalin

  “What’s making you nervous about going to see his family?”

  I was quiet for a moment as I stared at the carpet. “I haven’t seen them since everything happened with Carson.”

  “Except for Meredith?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, except for Meredith. She came to see me a few weeks ago. I don’t think she would be thrilled to see me.”

  Dr. Adams tilted his head as he studied me. “I don’t think that’s true, Emmalin. I think she was doing her duty as the sister, because she was worried about her brother. I don’t think she would’ve come all that way if she didn’t care about you, too. I want you to take the time to look at it from her perspective as well. That’s just one of the homework assignments I’m giving you.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  “Your other assignment is to go to Florida.” My head snapped up and my eyes widened. “Hear me out first, before you protest. You can’t keep hiding from them, Emmalin. We talked about you facing your fears head on, remember? If it scares you, talk it out. If you continue your relationship with Grayson, they’ll be in your life as well, and it sounds to me as if they’ve already welcomed you. You just need to figure out if you’re going to welcome them back.”

  I sighed. Damn him for being right. “Okay.”

  And that’s how I found myself on a plane Friday evening. I debated with myself to the point that I almost missed my plane. I didn’t tell Grayson I was going. I remembered standing outside the airport, clutching my plane ticket, thinking that maybe if I clutched it too tightly it’d be unreadable and they’d say I couldn’t fly. No such luck.

  “May I get you anything to drink, ma’am?”

  I looked up at the flight attendant and her warm pleasant smile. “Vodka, straight.”

  Her eyes briefly widened then she nodded and went to the front of the plane.