Yes, she wanted him to keep honoring his god. Yes, she wanted him to be the man she’d assumed was loyal to his religion. Yes, she loved him. Loved him for simply being sweet, kind, caring Jude.
“I... I... I don’t want to scare you off...” His other hand cupped her chin.
“Scare me? Why would you scare me?” But his supple statement did. Shivers and tremors shook her bones.
“No, not in that kind of way. I... uh... I don’t want to scare you off.”
“Scare me off?”
He massaged her fingers. His gentle touch dispelled the shivers. So did his tender gaze. He brushed his lips along her knuckles, pecking each one.
Her limbs began to melt. She was ready to dissolve into a puddle all over the truck seat. What she’d longed for but had kept telling herself she didn’t want or need seeped into his potent stare, was in his gentle caresses, and dangling on his gorgeous mouth.
“I... I love you.”
A lump formed in Raven’s throat. “I love you, too. I love you so much. I... I never thought I’d love... someone.” She strained to move over the console. Dammit, there was always something coming between them.
Jude’s lips met hers. Silky. Sweet. The kiss he rained on her was as velvet as the comfort he’d swathed her in. Each suckle, each peck moving along her mouth, each pucker of his lips was gentler than an autumn breeze Raven experienced down at the lake with the water lapping against the rocks.
The breaths from Jude’s nostrils coated her lips in sugary warmth. She fingered his cheekbone.
His lashes fluttered.
They were nose to nose. Raven couldn’t resist and rubbed the tip. Jude’s mouth formed into a wide grin, eyes twinkling.
“I never imagined I’d feel this way about anyone.” Her words seemed to stay between their lips that almost brushed. “I wasn’t looking, didn’t think I needed—”
“Same here,” Jude whispered. His palms still grazed her cheeks. His forehead touched hers.
“What about... what about your kids?”
“There’s a lot we must consider.” He traced her cheekbone. “We can talk more tomorrow night. After class. I have to get back to the house. Mom agreed to watch the kids so I could see Cookie.”
“Cookie...” Raven sighed. She still had to tell Jude about the deal she’d made. “Tomorrow night then.”
* * * *
Jude wasn’t surprised when Emery and Darryl showed up at his office at eight in the morning. After last night’s disclosure by Raven, both were probably in a panic, wondering what she’d said.
“Hey. Have a seat.” Jude motioned at the two chairs in front of his desk.
Darryl’s hair was braided off his face to the crown and the back left loose. The severe style he’d chosen matched the intense expression on his round face.
Emery wilted into the chair. Dark circles sat beneath his green eyes.
“We talked, but not about... your adventure in Winnipeg.” Jude had had time to think about his feelings and think about if word got out how it might impact the campaign.
“You’re meeting her tonight?” Darryl’s puzzled expression said he’d had no clue Jude was seeing Raven. Naturally, Emery hadn’t disclosed anything to Darryl, because little brother’s confidence was that of a priest in a confessional.
Emery cleared his throat. “Maybe you should tell him.”
Jude tossed his pen on the desk. “I’ve been... seeing Raven since the first week I moved here.”
“Wh-what?” Darryl’s eyes bulged at Jude and then he whipped his shocked gaze to Emery. “You knew about this and didn’t tell me?”
Squirming in the chair, Emery patted his thick waves of hair. “Uh... I... I can’t say anything to you that’s told to me in confidence. You know this. I don’t ask about in-camera band council meetings.”
Darryl’s face reddened. “Is this how she found out?”
“I don’t know how she found out. I’ll ask her tonight.” Jude did his best to keep the exasperation tightening around his shoulders from his voice.
“Tonight.” Darryl’s words were a nip from a dog. “Tonight.” He drummed his fingers on the armrest of the chair.
“Easy...” Emery set his hand over Darryl’s. “Remember what we talked about last night? Responsibility for our own choices, are own actions, our own behaviors?”
Nodding, the tension around Darryl’s mouth vanished. “Yeah.” He sank in the chair. “I guess I got nobody to blame but myself. I guess I never thought about a political career when I was... being an idiot.”
He thrust out his hands, scampering forward in the chair. “I was twenty-four. Everyone does dumb shit when they’re young.”
“Look, lemme figure out a way to put a spin on this.” Jude adjusted his laptop in front of him. “Give me time to think, and I’ll present you with something that I’ll write up if word gets out.”
“If word gets out...” Darryl grumbled. “She’s a Kabatay. She’s Clayton’s campaign manager. It’ll get out.”
“We don’t know that yet.” Like a stone wall, Jude’s defenses rose, ready to protect the woman he loved who faced horrible challenges from her family—horrible enough to chase Raven out into the winter nights instead of seeking warmth and comfort from a place supposedly called home.
Emery again patted his thick waves. “What happened to honesty is the best policy, and leaving everything in your creator’s hands?”
Jude nibbled on his pen cap. “You two discussed this already?”
Emery nodded.
“Then what’s it gonna be?” Jude readjusted his attention on a scowling Darryl.
“Gimme time to think.” Darryl stood. “I gotta get to work. I’ll text you later.”
* * * *
After opening the diner, Raven had danced her way through the kitchen, danced while performing her chores, and still danced as she set out fresh creamers and packets of sugar on each table.
Jude loved her. He wanted more than sex from her. More than dates. More than weekends in Thunder Bay. He wanted her to be a part of his life.
The bell tinkled. Raven turned to see Clayton rushing inside. He crooked his finger, barreling straight for the counter.
She switched off the speaker, silencing Rapsody’s Power. As she approached the back counter to pour him a coffee, her feet dragged.
“What’s up?” Raven turned over his mug with a wrist limper than noon’s spaghetti noodle special.
He again curled his finger, indicating for Raven to lean in closer.
She did while filling his mug.
“Did you see or hear anything last night when you delivered the food?”
A horrible ball of shock filled Raven’s throat. “Uh...”
“Did you see anything?”
“Oh... uh... see what?”
Clayton’s nose pinched. “You didn’t see or hear anything?”
“Well... I know Cookie was there. He was talking to s-someone in the eating area, but I didn’t stick around. I wanted to unload the stuff and take a drive... think about our strategy.”
“You should’ve stuck around.” Clayton banged his fist on the counter. “You woulda heard more than I did.”
“H-heard wh-what?” Raven held her breath.
“Get this.” Clayton remained almost nose to nose. “Bryan tipped me off. He texted me last night. He saw Emery and Darryl pulling up at the diner. Then he saw Jude walking over. I borrowed Tanya’s car and went to check it out.”
Dread coasted along Raven’s spine.
“I waited around the corner.” Clayton pointed to the side window. “Get this. Darryl was scouting hookers in the ‘Peg. He cheated on Emery with one.” His grin spread into a devious wide smile.
Raven swallowed the sputter. Her tongue searched for an even tone. “Are you sure?”
“More than sure. Heard it with my own ears. They were heading for their truck. He said, and I quote, What’re we gonna do? I
f word gets out about the hooker, I’m finished. I never shoulda went near the ‘Peg.”
“I... I...” She must respond... like the old Raven. “I see...” She grabbed the batch of napkins.
“This is what I got in mind.” Clayton remained hunched over. He used his finger to draw on the counter. “We hold a debate. Invite everyone. During the debate, that’s when I confront Darryl about his... hehe, indiscretion in Winnipeg. If his own husband can’t trust Darryl to remain loyal in their marriage, why should the rez trust him with money, with the well-being of the community, with everything?”
At least Clayton didn’t know the whole truth, but having their dirty laundry aired to everyone would embarrass Emery and Darryl, and even cost Darryl’s chance at chief.
“Set it up for the end of March. And keep this under your hat.” Clayton tapped his finger on the counter. “I don’t want anything leaking until the debate.”
At least Raven had time—time to think, time to talk to Jude, time to... oh hell, she might kiss her dream goodbye.
Raven closed her binder and textbook. The other students rose and filed out of the classroom. Jude continued to type on his laptop, having already dismissed everyone.
When the last person left, Raven rose and strolled over to Jude. She trailed her fingers along the desk’s smooth finish. A new feeling. She’d never loved a man. Not like this.
“I’m almost finished.” He kept typing away.
“What are you working on?” She sidled around his chair, standing behind him.
This time Jude didn’t slam his laptop lid closed. Her chest glowed. She leaned in and nibbled at his neck. A barely perceptible scent of the cologne he’d sprayed on this morning lingered on his skin.
“A strategy for the campaign. How’d your lesson go?” He clicked save and closed the window, the file vanishing into the laptop’s hard drive.
“Great.” Raven sat on the desk. Where should she start?
“Hey, once we talk, it’ll seem better.” He patted her knee.
A feather seemed to stroke her belly. “What makes you think I’m... distracted?”
“A lot went down last night.” He smiled lightly. “C’mon. I already have the truck warming up. We’ll go to the camp.”
Once Raven donned her jacket, she followed Jude outside, making sure to glance around so nobody saw them. Within ten minutes, they were parked at their hiding spot.
“Who’s watching the kids?” Raven removed the vape from her purse.
“Emery.” Jude uncapped the thermos.
“Black tea?”
“Yep.” He filled them each a cup.
They got out of the truck and stood in the headlights.
Raven removed her vape. She puffed, taking in the tobacco flavor that eased away some of the tension.
“I think we should...” Jude spanked his gloved hands together. “I think we should talk about what we promised not to talk about.”
A numbness seemed to invade Raven’s mouth. She nodded. But what answers could she give? She wasn’t sure what to do or think, or what to disclose. Clayton trusted her.
“Can I ask how you found out about Darryl?” Jude’s voice lacked authority. Nor was a hint of demanding present.
The recovery program told Raven to answer honestly. Rigorous honesty, if it didn’t hurt another, was mandatory. “I... I... when we... our trip to the city.”
Jude pursed his lips. “May I ask how during our trip?”
“I need you to believe me,” Raven blurted out. “It was an accident. No way was I going through your phone.”
His eyes widened, and his cheeks drew in.
“My phone buzzed. I picked up. I thought it was mine. We-we have the same phones. Yours is black. Mine’s purple. I was meditating. Reading. Praying. I read the text. I knew it wasn’t mine.” The words raced fast and high from her mouth, matching the galloping speed of her pulse points.
The tightness of Jude’s cheeks relaxed. He nodded.
“You gotta believe—”
“I do.”
“Wh-what? You do?” Raven croaked out. Nobody believed her, not after years of lying.
“Yes. I do. I trust you wouldn’t intentionally go through my phone.”
“Thank you.” A rush of relief swept through her. She leaned into Jude, head on his shoulder. “Thank you. Thank you so much. You’re the first... the first... besides people in the program...”
“The first to what?” He stroked her back.
“To believe me. My family always thinks I’m lying,” Raven murmured. “I guess I deserve it after what I—”
“What you did is in the past.”
“I know. But after what your ex-wife did, I thought you’d have—”
“You’re not Charlene. Why should you pay for what she did to me?”
She lifted her head from his shoulder. “Really?”
He nodded, dimples exposed.
She wrapped her arms around his waist. “I... I... can I have time to think, first? I need to talk to my... sponsor.” Well, there was Adam who’d said they could video chat.
“Sure.” He pecked her cheek. “May I interest you in the back of my truck?” His tone was teasing.
“Sure.” For the first time, she’d experience sex while she loved someone. And she couldn’t wait to find out if it was different.
Jude opened the door. He flipped the seats up while Raven shrugged off her parka.
“After you...” He gestured at her.
Giggling, Raven climbed inside. She tossed her parka in the front seat.
He climbed in after her. “Boy, someone is excited. Should I be flattered?”
“I, um, never had sex with someone I loved. Uh, not that I ever loved a guy.” Raven licked her lips.
“It’s the best. The best sex you’ll ever experience.” His grin and devilish twinkle said he spoke the truth.
“Oh wow...” Her voice resembled the croak of a frog.
Jude kept grinning and melted his lips over hers. What he lavished on her wasn’t steamy or sensual, but sweet and filled with affection.
Raven trembled. Affection was a foreign emotion. And it left her warm, the same feeling of being draped in satin. He was satin—his skin she ran her fingers along, having sneaked her hands up his sweater, his hard nipples she caressed, the exploration of his mouth on her lips that was as tender as a whisper in her ear.
He eased off his sweater and tossed the garment in the front seat. Left was his thermal shirt to keep the cold away. Once he removed it, he worked on the buttons to her cardigan. Each unfastening, slow and gallant, left Raven shivering. No rush. No hurry to get undressed.
She panted because the waiting was drawing the air from her lungs. After the longest moment of her life while continuing to accept his delicate kisses, experience the heat of his breath on her skin, and his small moans, her sweater was open. He slid his hand up her camisole. His palm edged from her stomach and trailed her ribcage.
She couldn’t get over his leisurely exploration. He was loving her with his flesh, touching every part of her, and not just the good bits. Elation consumed her. He wanted to know the tiny dips and curves of her body. His fingers brushed back and forth, tenderly skimming her tummy. Then he drew a circle around her naval. She shivered from the goosebumps pushing to the surface beneath her skin.
He didn’t slip his tongue between her lips, either, but kept showering her with kisses as slow and affectionate as his finger skimming around her belly button.
Heat built in Raven’s crotch. The dampness in her panties prickled and itched. Want and need consumed her, like getting out of her clothes to let some air relieve the fever in her pants. Again, she tried to capture Jude’s tongue with hers, but he didn’t open his mouth. Instead, his lips left a tender path of kisses to her throat where he suckled. He didn’t draw the skin between his teeth but offered simple pecks full of steam and light breaths that whispered along her neck.
>
Her heart seemed to rattle upward. Her insides bubbled. Her lungs were swelling, almost seeming to fill with too much air.
“Jude...” She gasped and dug her nails into his bare back. She wiggled her hips, searching out his crotch. Anything to dampen the eruption coiling upward and threatening to burst.
“Easy.” His gentle command was moist on her neck. His palm moved from her belly button and flicked at the opening of her leggings. His fingers toyed with the elastic band of the waist.
“Mmm... I love how you made it easy for me tonight, sweetheart.” His words were part teasing and part raspy.
He never slipped inside. His finger kept toying with the elastic band, slithering back and forth until she squirmed, her body an angry fire of impatience. She wiggled. She wormed. But he didn’t take the hint. His breaths continued to steam her neck, and his finger kept roving along her waist.
Gosh, she had to find a way to get him moving. But when Raven inched her hand from his chest to the trail of hair leading into his jeans, he moved on top of her. His hard cock melted against her sopping wet pussy where her clit throbbed, begging for his finger to stroke her off.
“Easy,” he whispered. “Don’t you want me to love you?”
Love her? Raven squealed. Her words came out ragged. “I... I need you. I need you bad. Please...”
He brushed at her damp hairline and pecked her forehead. “You don’t think I feel the same way?” His warm palm cupped her cheek.
“Please...” Goodness, she was begging, because her body was begging. Her tits begging. Her clit begging. Her cunt begging.
“Sure. I want you as bad as you want me.”
He shifted to lower his jeans. Raven fought to peel off the leggings. She kicked them from her ankles just as Jude laid back over her. His bare skin saturated her already hot flesh with too much warmth. His nipples met hers that stood hard and proud. His cock nestled on her landing strip of pubic hair.
She locked her legs around him. “Inside me. Fuck me.”
“Uh-uh. Bad girl. What do you say?” His voice was as toying as his magical fingers.
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