Lunch with a Soldier

by Derek Hansen

  ‘Now, I’m going to pass the papers to you, Linda, and you’re going to initial every page and sign and date them where they’re marked with a cross. When you’ve finished, lover boy here can witness your signature. I think that’s a nice touch, don’t you, having Billy act as witness?’

  ‘Go to hell.’

  Billy spun around. Linda was still shaking but her jaw was set and her eyes blazed defiance. ‘I’m not signing.’

  Billy turned back to look at Grant, alarmed. The colour had gone from Grant’s face and his lips, which had played with a sneering half smile as he’d taunted them, had retreated to two thin lines. At first there was disbelief in his eyes but it quickly turned to hate.

  ‘Well, I guess you’ve just made my decision for me. You see, I was being absolutely honest when I said I didn’t much care which way the decision went. I’m really going to enjoy breaking you, Linda, breaking you bit by bit. How many days would you like to spend dying? I mean, I’m not going to rush this. It might be the last real pleasure I get out of life. Billy’s probably right in that I will be the main suspect when you disappear and there’s no way I’ll let them put me back in gaol. You’re going to pay, Linda, you are going to pay in spades, not just for what you’ve done to me but for whatever happens next. You’re going to suffer like you made me suffer. First, you’re going to watch me shoot Billy. I’m sorry, Billy, that it’s come to this but super bitch has left me no choice. But now do you understand what we’re dealing with here? Now do you understand what a hard, ruthless bitch she really is? She’d rather watch me shoot you than sign away her company. She values her company and her ambitions more than your life. How do you feel about that, Billy? How do you feel about the bitch now?’

  Grant raised the rifle and lined Billy up in the sights.

  ‘Linda, for Christ’s sake! Tell him you’ll sign!’ Billy turned to look at her but she wouldn’t meet his eyes and kept her mouth resolutely shut. ‘Tell him!’

  ‘Yes, tell me, Linda.’

  ‘Linda!’ Billy was stunned. ‘For Christ’s sake, Linda, if he kills me he’ll kill you! What good will that do? Tell him you’ll sign!’

  ‘Last chance, Linda. Three … two … one … sorry, Billy.’

  Billy knew he didn’t have a chance but decided to at least die trying. He jerked forward, transferring his weight over his knees, and pushed down with his thighs and calves. At the same time he pushed down with his hands, felt the delay as the energy was partially absorbed by the padding in the sofa. He’d never pushed harder in his life or with more determination but he knew he was too slow gathering momentum and braced himself for the bullet. He was dimly aware of Bella reacting, her growl and the scrabbling of her claws as she struggled for traction. He saw Grant’s finger tighten on the trigger, saw his life face extinction, and turned away before the explosion. Instinctively he covered up to protect himself and recoiled backwards. The closeness of the shot almost deafened him. His ears rang yet he could hear Linda screaming alongside him. Screaming and screaming. In blind panic he tried to work out where he’d been hit and why he couldn’t feel the pain and why his brain was still thinking. You’re not supposed to hear the shot that gets you. Everyone knew that! You never hear the shot that gets you, but he’d heard it, his ears still rang with it. Then he remembered there’d been another sound, something he’d heard and ignored and now understood. He dared to look down, leaning forward to see clearly. Her head had come to rest on his foot. Her lifeless tongue hung over the arch. Blood seeped onto the rug. Tears he’d never expected to flow again welled up in his eyes, tears of anger, sorrow, relief, disgust. Linda sobbed hysterically but words of comfort were the last thing on his mind.

  ‘Well, soldier, what do you think? Pretty good shot? I haven’t had a lot to do with guns but I’ve got a good eye. Flows on from my training as a cameraman. Do you think I got through to Linda, Billy, or was it just a waste of a dog?’

  ‘You didn’t have to shoot it.’

  ‘I did, Billy. I had to shoot someone or something. It came down to you or the dog. I hope you agree that I made the right choice. Now it’s just between you and the bitch. No more chances. No more choices. God, I’d like another beer. Billy, you look like you could use one too. The thing is, I don’t think we can trust super bitch to go get them for us. I think once she got to the kitchen she’d do a runner. She’d sacrifice you, Billy. I mean, if she can do it once, she can do it twice, right?’

  ‘I’ll sign.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘I’ll sign.’

  Billy slowly turned to look at Linda. Her voice was barely audible, flat, lifeless, defeated. The defiance was long gone from her eyes. Tears filled them now.

  ‘Louder, Linda, I can’t hear you.’

  ‘I said I’ll sign.’

  ‘Hear that, Billy? She’s changed her mind. Changed it, just like that. If she’d exercised her woman’s prerogative a moment ago your little doggy would still be alive. Thing is, Billy, do you think her new spirit of cooperation means we can trust her to get us a couple of beers? Can we trust you, Linda? Can we?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Amazing, isn’t it, Billy. Shoot a dog and the bitch comes to heel. Why didn’t I think of it before? I’ll tell you what you’ll do, Linda. You’ll get up slowly and stay in my line of sight. Stay in the doorway where I can see you. Reach around the fridge door for the beers. Understand?’

  ‘Yes.’ Linda stood shakily, and turned towards Billy at the sight of Bella’s body. ‘I’m so sorry, Billy. I never thought he’d shoot. I forgot about Bella. I’m so sorry.’

  Billy nodded acknowledgement.

  ‘She’s sorry, Billy. Touching, isn’t it?’ Grant stood so Linda could pass in front of him but well beyond reach. ‘Bitch was quite happy for me to shoot you but she’s upset because I shot the dog. Well, at least you know where you stand. Now move it, Linda. Keep your arse in sight at all times. I want a target I can’t miss.’ Grant kept his rifle up and pointed at Linda as she made her way to the fridge and opened it, but his eyes flicked back and forth between her and Billy. He smiled as Linda straightened and made her way back with a can of VB in each hand. ‘Put one down on the table, Linda, and open the other before you give it to lover boy. That’s it. Okay now, Billy, I don’t want you abusing my generosity and doing something silly like throwing your can at me, so would you put your right hand behind your head and keep it there. Okay, Linda, give him his beer and sit down.’ He resumed his perch on the table and opened his can. ‘Cheers, Billy.’

  ‘Cheers.’

  ‘Now, Linda, I believe you’re going to sign some papers.’

  ‘You’ll have to wait until my hands stop shaking otherwise people will know I signed under duress. You could take the dog out onto the veranda or something. It’s not helping me, having her lie there.’

  ‘That’s a good idea, Linda. Why don’t you pick her up and put her outside?’

  ‘Me?’

  ‘You’re the one who wants her moved. Billy and I are having a beer. Besides, I think it’ll do you good to discover what a dead body feels like.’

  Linda got up off the sofa and bent to pick Bella up. Tears spilled from her eyes. She struggled to get her arms beneath so that the body was evenly supported and staggered to the veranda door.

  ‘I can’t open it.’

  ‘Use your feet.’

  Linda kicked the screen door across and gently laid Bella down on the veranda. She ignored the insects that threatened to engulf her, rose to her feet and stood head bowed over the body. It slowly dawned on Billy what she was up to and the gamble she was taking.

  ‘Shut the screen and sit down,’ ordered Grant. ‘It’s time to get the business over and done with so we can all relax and have a good time.’

  ‘My hands are still shaking. Look.’

  ‘For Christ’s sake, Billy, give her a sip of your beer. I’m starting to lose patience.’ He picked up the envelope with the documents inside and threw it at Linda. He also thre
w her a pen. ‘Practise your signature on the envelope and then get to it. Stop fucking me around.’

  Linda opened the envelope and started reading.

  ‘What the hell are you doing now?’

  ‘I’m reading the documents. I want to see what I’m signing.’

  ‘For fuck’s sake, I’ve told you what you’re signing! Get on with it!’

  ‘What’s the big hurry, Grant? Reading this is just the distraction I need to calm me down and steady my hands.’

  ‘Okay, okay. Take your time. We’ve got all the time in the world, haven’t we, Billy? How’s the beer going? Good?’

  ‘Can’t complain.’

  ‘You know, Billy, another time and another place I think I could get to quite like you. I must admit I’m not much of a VB man myself. I prefer the European beers — Lowenbrau, Becks, Peroni. And I always think beer tastes better out of bottles than cans.’

  Billy pretended interest but his ears strained for the sound of a stealthy movement of someone slipping through the undergrowth, searching, creeping nearer and nearer. Alongside him, Linda read through the documents as though weighing every word. He no longer knew what to make of her.

  ‘Tell me, Billy, did you kill anyone over in Vietnam?’

  ‘What’s it to you?’

  ‘I want to know what I missed.’

  ‘Believe me, that’s the last thing you want to know.’

  ‘Why? Don’t you think I could handle it?’

  Billy glanced towards the veranda windows. He sensed Linda silently urging him to keep talking.

  ‘It doesn’t matter whether you could handle it or not. That wasn’t a choice they gave you.’

  ‘Spare me the dramatics, Billy, just answer the question. Did you kill anyone?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘How many?’

  ‘Hard to say.’

  ‘That many? Soldiers or civilians?’

  ‘Sometimes it was hard to tell which was which.’

  ‘So you might have killed civilians. Any women and children, Billy? I got six years just for being in the same room as a woman who killed herself. How many women did you kill?’

  Billy thought back to the bombed village in the rain and the villagers running screaming towards him. He remembered the woman who’d filled his sights and her crying children, saw her fall over and get back up again, and how he’d thought it was odd that there could be so much fire in the midst of so much rain. He remembered the noise of the rain and the bombs and the woman falling again, soundless amid all the sound. Saw her get up and reach for her children. Then someone lost his nerve and started shooting and others joined in before the officers restored control. He’d fired just one round, one single round, a nervous reaction to someone else’s nervous reaction. Three people fell and didn’t get up again. One was the woman he’d targeted. Her kids pulled her arm, trying to lift her back to her feet. Trying to bring her back to life.

  ‘Hello, Billy? Hello? Anyone there?’

  ‘Like I said before, you don’t want to know. Want to know something else? I don’t want to know either.’

  ‘Whoa! Down, boy! Getting a bit touchy there. You know, some people looking in on us right now might think I was the killer. But my conscience is clear. I have no trouble sleeping at night. What about you, Billy boy? Having any bad dreams? Night sweats? Conscience troubling you?’

  ‘No, not that I’m aware of.’

  ‘Not that you’re aware of? What kind of an answer is that?’ Grant drained the dregs of his beer can and turned to Linda.

  ‘Time’s up. Stop reading. Start signing. And don’t piss me about.’

  ‘I’ve nearly finished.’

  ‘No, Linda. You’re not listening.’ Grant picked up his rifle again to make his point. ‘You’ve finished reading. Simple Simon semi-automatic says pick up the pen, do a couple of signatures on the envelope and start signing. I’ve had all the beers I want and all of your company I can stand.’

  Linda picked up the pen and signed her name twice on the envelope. Her hand was still a little unsteady but it didn’t show in her signature.

  ‘Satisfied?’

  ‘Get on with it.’

  Linda worked through the document, initialling each page and signing and dating both copies of the agreement. She passed the documents over to Billy to witness, showing him exactly where to sign. Billy put his beer down and took the pen in his right hand. It was hard to concentrate on the papers in front of him when his ears were screaming at him to look elsewhere. The bottom step of the veranda had a sound all of its own, a short, barely discernible sound of wood rubbing on wood whenever weight was placed on it. He glanced up at Grant to make sure he held all of his attention.

  ‘Do I witness both copies?’

  ‘Don’t you start pissing me about too, Billy. Just sign the bloody things.’ He watched carefully as Billy added his signature to the second document. ‘Good.’

  Billy held his breath. For once he wanted Rodney to shoot first and ask questions after.

  ‘Hand up, you bar-tid, hoo-wah, bitch!’

  Billy’s eyes shot to the screen door. He could see Rodney standing there, shotgun cradled into his shoulder. He turned to Grant, expecting him to freeze, but he was already pivoting. Grant fired and fired again, not with calm deliberation but from sheer fright, firing blindly, not aiming but pointing.

  ‘Shoot, Rodney!’ Billy didn’t know whether he said it or just thought it, but he was too slow anyway. Rodney’s cry of pain cut through him like a knife to the heart. He lunged up out of the sofa but was too late. Rodney had disappeared from the screen door and Grant was crouched over, pointing the rifle at him.

  ‘Sit down! Sit down, Billy!’

  Billy sat back down. Grant was wild-eyed with fear and clearly panicking, swinging his rifle recklessly, finger tight over the trigger. Outside Rodney was howling like a wounded dog, his cries growing more desperate and anguished by the second. And also fainter.

  ‘Oh God, Grant, what have you done?’

  Linda had risen to her feet; Billy had no idea when. Her eyes were flared and staring, her hands covered her mouth.

  ‘He had a gun! For Christ’s sake! Oh, holy shit! He had a gun!’ Grant was still in a crouch, uncertain whether to point his rifle at Billy, Linda or the punctured screen door. ‘Who or what the fuck was that? Tell me!’

  ‘He’s my neighbour! You shot him!’

  Grant was shouting and Linda was shouting back at him. Billy heard the sound of stones falling and someone sliding and whimpering. Rodney was trying to crawl back to his home.

  ‘It was self-defence, you saw that.’

  ‘Shut up, both of you,’ said Billy forcefully. He got to his feet. ‘I don’t give a damn which of you ends up with the bloody company and I don’t give a damn who did what to who. You hear me? Rodney’s out there and needs our help and I’m going to help him.’

  ‘You’re not going anywhere!’

  ‘Try and stop me.’

  ‘Sit down!’

  Billy realised Grant was panicked enough to squeeze the trigger either intentionally or unintentionally. He hesitated, torn between self-preservation and the need to help Rodney. Finally he sat back down, but only on the edge of the sofa.

  ‘Grant, we have to do something.’ Linda was pleading. ‘He could be badly hurt. I’ve signed your document. What more do you want?’

  ‘Shut up! Sit down! I need time to think. Shit!’

  ‘We haven’t got any time!’

  ‘Shut the fuck up!’

  Linda sat down but, like Billy, barely on the edge of the seat.

  ‘Now everyone and his fucking dog will know you signed the documents under duress!’ said Grant. ‘Don’t you see? You want proof of duress? How about a fuckwitted neighbour with a bullet hole in him?’

  ‘I promise I won’t contest it.’

  ‘Jesus! How stupid do you think I am? Like I’d take your word.’

  ‘You can take mine.’

  ‘What’s
that, Billy boy?’

  ‘I’ll back you up. I’ll swear in court that Linda signed of her own free will. I’ll confirm that you shot Rodney in self-defence.’

  ‘Why should I trust you?’ Grant glared at Billy, all his composure and arrogance gone. ‘I suppose you also have a simple explanation for why I just happened to be sitting here with a loaded rifle?’

  ‘I’ll square things away with Rodney. He’ll do whatever I tell him. Provided he’s still alive. Provided we get to him before he dies.’

  ‘Listen to him, Grant. Rodney does whatever Billy tells him.’

  ‘You don’t have any choice.’ Billy stood up again. ‘You can either trust me or shoot me, because I’m going out after Rodney.’

  ‘Okay, okay! We’ll all go. You’d better not be lying to me, Billy. You know I’ve got a low tolerance for liars. Linda! Pass me the agreement.’

  Linda handed the documents to Grant. He was too jittery to give the pages anything more than a cursory check. With shaking hands he stuffed them back into their envelope and put the envelope in his backpack. He took out his torch.

  ‘Any more torches? We need more torches.’

  ‘I’ve got two,’ said Linda. ‘One’s in the kitchen, the other’s in my bedroom.’

  ‘Get them. And grab your first-aid kit. She’s got one, hasn’t she, Billy?’

  ‘She’s got one.’

  ‘Good. I’m trusting you to keep your word, Billy. But take one step out of line and I’ll fucking shoot you.’

  Billy nodded. The only thing that mattered was helping Rodney.

  ‘Right. You go first. Linda, give him a torch and follow him. I’ll follow you. Just don’t try anything, okay?’

  Billy paused as he stepped over the body of Bella. There was a splash of blood beside it, too fresh to have seeped from the dog’s body. There was another drip on the top step. He felt a rage surge inside him that he’d rarely felt since he’d been sent home from Sydney. First things first, he thought. Help Rodney, if Rodney could still be helped. Everything else could wait. He strode quickly to the trail up over the ridge, hoping he wouldn’t find Rodney lying dead beside it.