Blood & Tacos #1
Page 10
"Let's dance, bitches," Chingón laughed, as he dropped the grenades one by one out the window.
The Jeep darted out of the way of the first grenade, the explosion just missing. Weaving to miss the next grenade, it overcompensated and spun out. Ultimately, the error saved their lives as the other two grenades exploded in front of them.
While Chingón had meant to end the battle there and then, he would take the delay as a victory and put some distance between the Impala and the Jeep.
Taking back the wheel from Amanda Gray and driving like a madman through the windy mountain roads, he just missed a semi on a blind corner. The tiny wheels just held onto the tarmacadam.
"Do you see them?" Chingón said, eyes focused straight ahead.
"They're about three turns back. What are we going to do?" Amanda Gray said.
"Chingón is tired of running," Chingón said.
He slammed the brakes and expertly slid the car behind a gigantic boulder. He jumped out, pulling at two more grenades.
Standing just behind the boulder at the side of the road, he pulled the pins on the grenades, closed his eyes, and waited. He listened to birds' wings miles away, the wind brushing the mesquite, and the approaching tires of the Jeep.
Chingón threw the two grenades in a high arc almost straight up in the air, and then walked into the middle of the road to face the oncoming Jeep. As it rounded the turn, the murder in Walker's eyes was revealed for only a moment.
"Adios, cabrons," Chingón said.
The arcing grenades made their descent and with perfect timing landed in Walker's lap.
"Motherfu—" Walker said.
The Jeep exploded.
The burning metal carcass flew over Chingón's head and off the steep cliff behind him. He lit his cigar on the burning hulk as it passed and walked back to his Impala.
Running his finger along the line of bullet holes in the side panel, Chingón said. "Puta madre, I wish I could kill them again."
He got in the car and turned to Amanda Gray. Chingón said, "I think that's enough adventure for one day. Let's get you home."
On seeing his daughter alive, Senator Gray was overjoyed. So much so that he paid Chingón double the asking price. That was on top of the bonus that Amanda Gray had given him on the ride back. Not money, but mouth sex.
Chingón shook the man's hand and said, "And while I did this for the money, I also did this for what is right. No woman should be stolen by any man. Men cannot make their own rules. They must follow the rules made for them by other men. And as long as people do not abide by those rules, Chingón will be there to punish them with the lash of his whip and the explosion power of his grenades. Because there are no rules for Chingón. Chingón follows no man, but enforces their rules, for money. And men best follow those rules. Because they are the rules. And rules must be obeyed. Rules."
"I agree," Senator Gray said, "Now, I must go. I have an election to win."
And with that, Chingón turned and walked to his Chevy Impala. He usually left politics for men with bowties in their dresser drawers, but he was going to make an exception for Governor Deutsch. He thought he'd pay him a visit and see where he stood on the death penalty.
FIN
Along with his role as editor of Blood & Tacos, Johnny Shaw is a screenwriter, playwright, and the author of the novel Dove Season: A Jimmy Veeder Fiasco. For the last dozen years, Johnny has taught writing, lecturing at both Santa Barbara City College and UC Santa Barbara.
From the Publisher
I like titles. Not the gentry type, though those are ok too. No I mean book/story/movie titles. Where there are folks that will judge a book by its cover, I'm more inclined to judge by its title. You can tell this is true with a quick look at what I've published in the past – books with …odd, perhaps, but distinctive titles: Stays Crunchy in Milk, Installing Linux on Dead Badger, Amityville House of Pancakes – I mean, come on.
So when Johnny was in the process of getting himself all set up as a real honest-to-god author of a novel (never mind that he'd already put more words to paper than Moses) and was tossing around website domain ideas and names, along with a healthy dose of badgering from me about how important a web presence was, the phrase "Blood and Tacos" came up.
It was love at first hear for me.
I tried, believe me, begged, cajoled and browbeat, to get him to call his author website Blood & Tacos, as differentiated from the domain itself – URL it what you will, says I, Blood & Tacos is a fantastic TITLE. And the domain is open, you know, in case you wanted it!
No go – in some ways my old chum is kind of traditional, and stuck with "JohnnyShawAuthor.com" but I kept up the badgering to not let the name Blood & Tacos die.
And so here we are. As the one-time owner of the website ClassicPulp.com you can imagine I'm pretty thrilled with what Blood & Tacos has become – perhaps even more than if it were an author site. Even more thrilled that I've done precious little of the work, but still get to hang my name on it. At any rate, thanks for coming along for this first ride, and look forward to seeing you a couple more times this year.
Pete S. Allen,
Creative Guy
Table of Contents
From the Desk of Johnny Shaw
The Silencer in: THE SILENCER STRIKES
The Most Penetrative Game
The Albino Wino in: LONGHAIR DEATH FARM
Battleground U.S.S.A.: TEXASGRAD
Raker: A Review
Tiger Team Bravo in: BONDS OF BLOOD
Ben Slayton: T-Man or He-Man?
Chingón, The World's Deadliest Mexican in: BLOOD AND TACOS
FIN
From the Publisher