Only the Lonely

by Laura Dower

  “Sure!” Madison grabbed Aimee’s arm. “What about it, Aimee?”

  “Yeah,” Fiona said. “Come on, Aimee.”

  Madison looked at her friend as if to say, “Come on, let’s just go play Frisbee and act stupid and forget about everything else today, okay?”

  Aimee had other ideas. “Nah, you two go ahead.”

  “No,” Madison said. “Aimee, we can’t play without you.”

  Fiona tapped her foot. “Are we playing … or staying?”

  Madison shook her head. “I think that I’ll pass, Fiona.”

  Fiona shrugged and walked toward the lawn. “Okay. See you later then! Call me, okay?”

  Madison nodded. “See you later!”

  “You didn’t have to not play just because of me,” Aimee blurted out. “When I was at camp I was actually a good Frisbee player, but right now I just don’t feel like it for some reason, but that doesn’t mean you have to stop. I didn’t mean to upset you or get in between you and Fiona and—I feel like a big doofus right now. Jeesh.”

  Madison grabbed Aimee’s arm. “You’re my BFF, Aimee. That means forever, remember. Who cares about Frisbee?”

  They decided to go hang out by the pool instead.

  Mom picked the Three Musketeers up sometime after ten o’clock, which was late, but okay because it wasn’t a school night. Phin was in the car of course, and Egg teased him mercilessly all the way home.

  “Dawg fooooooood!” he tickled Phin on his soft, spotted pug belly.

  “Leave my dog alone!” Madison punched Egg right in the arm.

  “Ouch! That hurt!” he yelled.

  “Rowroooo!” Phin howled.

  Mom dropped off Aimee last. She and Madison made a pact to see each other tomorrow, Saturday. It was supposed to get really hot.

  Later that night, after Mom thought she had already turned out the light and left her daughter in the land of Nod, Madison pulled her laptop computer into bed with her.

  She owed Bigwheels a note.

  From: MadFinn

  To: Bigwheels

  Subject: BBQ

  Date: Fri 8 Sept 11:11 PM

  I went. It was on this big estate and everyone was sunbathing and smiling and I waltzed in and made the friend thing work like you said I could.

  Thank you for your long-distance advice.

  I couldn’t have BBQ-ed without you. You know if you ever need advice from me, I’ll try to give it!

  Yours till the root beer floats, MadFinn

  p.s. write back sooner than soon!

  Lastly, Madison went into her favorite file.

  Only the Lonely

  Today was Drew’s BBQ.

  He had one in fifth grade, the first one he ever threw I think, but I had a cold and had to stay home from school that day. He had one last year, too, but I can’t remember exactly why I wasn’t there. I seem to remember being in the middle of some kind of personal crisis seeing as that is the time when Mom and Dad got the big D. Yeah that was definitely it. The big D got in the way a lot last year.

  All I can think about is the way things used to be and how that won’t ever change. What I mean is that no one can ever take any of that away from me. No matter whatever happens in the future, I own every little thing that has already happened in the past—all the food fights, the pop quizzes, all of it.

  Maybe worrying about being only the lonely was TOTALLY normal??? Maybe everyone is a bit lonely.

  How can I possibly be lonely when everything that makes me and Aimee BFFs has already happened? No one can take that. So no matter how many Fionas I meet, no matter how my body changes, no matter how time flies, Aimee and I will never change what makes us close. No one can take away the soul sisters pact from fourth grade or the fact that I know all her secrets and she knows all of mine, right? Why is it that I can’t ever seem to

  Madison’s eyes were getting very sleepy. She tried to keep writing, but she just couldn’t, so she turned off her computer and pulled up the blankets, patting the bed a few times so Phin would leap up and under the covers. Of course the dog jumped in immediately. He licked Madison’s nose. That was his puggly way of saying nighty-night.

  Madison had been afraid she wouldn’t make it through the summer.

  But she had—all the way through to September.

  She was scared about starting seventh grade.

  But here she was—and the giant pink welt on her shoulder had already disappeared.

  She closed her tired eyes dreaming about how she and Aimee would spend Saturday afternoon tomorrow in the middle of the Indian summer heat wave, dancing in the sprinklers on Aimee’s lawn, getting cooled off, and laughing the way they did every summer—just like last year and all the years before that.

  From now on, Madison Finn would be only the lonely no more.

  And she was 100 percent ready to expect the unexpected—online and off.

  Mad Chat Words:

  :>)

  Smile

  (( ))*

  Hugs and Smooches

  :-@

  I’m screaming!

  ;- )

  Winky-wink

  *poof*

  Has left the chat room

  GMTA

  Great Minds Think Alike

  IMO

  In My Opinion

  LOL

  Laugh Out Loud

  BTW

  By the Way

  L8R

  Later

  2K4W

  Too Cool For Words

  TTFN

  Ta Ta For Now

  BRB

  Be Right. Back

  Madison’s Computer Tip:

  Whenever you are online, you have to be smart and safe, especially when you’re in chat rooms. Never give out information about you or your family online. This means no phone numbers, addresses, passwords, or credit card numbers. I always tell my Mom or Dad where I surf online and who I talk to. You should too.

  Visit Madison online at the author’s page: www.lauradower.com

  Turn the page to continue reading from Laura Dower’s From the Files of Madison Finn series

  Chapter 1

  FIFTEEN MINUTES INTO THE start of the school day, and Madison Finn had already chewed off all the orange glitter polish on her left hand. It was one of Madison’s thirty or so nervous habits, right up there on the list next to sweating when she tried to play the flute and fleeing the scene when she was embarrassed. She was very skilled at fleeing.

  Mrs. Wing stood in front of the classroom. “Here in the twenty-first century, technology teacher and librarian have morphed into one happy being,” she said. “Just call me super-cybrarian, kids.”

  “Uh, that’s Mrs. Cybrarian to us, right?” Egg (a.k.a. Walter Diaz) said aloud, his voice warbling.

  Mrs. Wing smiled. “Yes, Mr. Diaz! Now, last week we talked about how a digital portfolio is made.” Mrs. Wing stood up at a lectern in front of the class. She always stood there, sometimes leaning on her elbows. The beads around her neck would jangle and clink as they hit the smaller podium. “I know everyone can text with one finger and play Monkeyvilla with another one. But I also want you to know how computers really work—how hardware is assembled and how code tells a computer what to do. Mr. Diaz has been kind enough to explain some of these things to us.”

  She glanced over to Egg’s desk and he grinned a real Grinchy grin.

  “Anything for you, Mrs. Wing,” he said.

  Madison flared her nostrils. The only thing she hated more than Egg’s constant crushing on teachers was when he was being extra cocky. Today he was doing both!

  Ever since Madison and Egg were kids, he had crushed on pretty female teachers. First it was kindergarten’s Miss Jeremiah; now it was the seventh-grade cybrarian.

  Mrs. Wing fit into Egg’s crush category perfectly. She was prettier than pretty, Madison thought. Her long hair was swept up into a French twist and she wore a long plum-colored skirt, a neat white blouse, and a red
bead necklace. She moved around the room as if she were walking on cotton balls, floating from computer station to station, beads plink-plink-plinking together.

  “Now, what I’d like to review with the class are some basic computer skills,” Mrs. Wing continued. “And then I think we will be all ready to move ahead and test-drive some of the many terrific applications available to us online.”

  Lance, a quiet kid who always sat at the back of the classroom, raised his hand and shook his head, dejected. He didn’t get computers and felt way left out. He was not ready. Not by a long jump. Or was it a shot put?

  Madison shot Egg a glance, but, thankfully, Mrs. Wing said she’d explain it again later.

  “There are so many ways to manipulate information digitally,” Mrs. Wing went on. “You can build a whole universe on a web page. Just think about using technology to express yourself. Think about what that could do for all of you. Go way beyond your games and instant pics … become a technological pioneer!”

  The classroom let out a cheer.

  Madison chuckled at the “go beyond your games and instant pics” comment. Madison and her Mom took plenty of posed “selfies” when they were in Brazil that summer.

  “Looking around, I can see already that I have a classroom filled with technological wizards,” Mrs. Wing commented. “And yes, even you, Lance.”

  He smirked and someone on the other side of the room snorted. Madison realized it was Egg’s best friend, Drew Maxwell. He always laughed at the wrong moments. And as soon as he’d snorted, Egg snorted too. And then this kid P.J. Rigby snorted. And then Jason Szelewski, Beth Dunfey, Suresh Dhir—everyone snorted.

  It sounded like a pig farm!

  Mrs. Wing didn’t get mad, though. She just sort of snorted right back.

  “Well, I can see we’ll be having a lot of fun in here, class. Just let’s make sure it’s not at someone else’s expense, okay?”

  Madison saw Egg making puppy-dog eyes at the back of Mrs. Wing’s head when she said that. Turning away, Madison plugged in her personal flash drive and booted up her files.

  Class Notes

  Nothing at Far Hills Junior High is what I expected. I thought it would be way different than middle school. NOT. I figured there was no way the same people from Far Hills Elementary would be geeks or popular but that is just the way it is, like the same thing as last year but in a different building. Dad says I always overthink this kind of stuff but it’s just so hard to hold back a thought sometimes.

  Mrs. Wing is sooo smart, so she probably will catch me right now writing personal stuff, and not school stuff but oh well. She’s all the way on the other side of the room.

  I like the way her beads look like red jelly beans. I wear a ring on almost every single finger, but I don’t go for necklaces so much. Maybe I should?

  Something about seventh grade was inspiring Madison. With a new laptop and the e-reader Dad got for her birthday, maybe she could become a techno-queen.

  “Mrs. Wing’s so cool, right?” Egg nudged Madison and stared as Mrs. Wing flew around to the other side of the classroom.

  Madison looked down at her desk. Egg was just embarrassing.

  “Egg,” Madison whispered back. “Aren’t you bored? We know this stuff already.”

  “Bored? Nope!” Egg replied, pie-eyed. “What do you want? More work?”

  Madison sneered. “Don’t you want to learn something new?”

  “Learn? Geesh, you sound like a mom,” Egg’s pal Drew butted in.

  “Yeah,” Egg said, copying him. “You sound like my mom!”

  Madison growled.

  The two boys pretended to be really scared; then they laughed and high-fived each other.

  “Well at least I don’t have a crush on someone who acts like my mom,” Madison blurted—a little too loudly.

  “Shhhh!” Drew suddenly warned, yanking Egg’s fleece. “Incoming.”

  Mrs. Wing had heard the ruckus. She was headed back toward their computer stations.

  “Mr. Diaz. Miss Finn. Mr. Maxwell … Problem here?” Mrs. Wing asked.

  Madison and Egg looked at their monitors and grunted at the same time in the same monotone. “No, Mrs. Wing. No problem.”

  Then she looked over at Drew.

  He tried not to react. But it’s hard to hold back a snort.

  “Do I need to separate you three?” Mrs. Wing said, tapping her foot. Madison thought she would stay like that forever, huffing and puffing and looking disappointed, but in less than a minute she gave up. Mrs. Wing had to help Lance, who was lost in Basic again.

  Madison glared at Drew and Egg. “Don’t get me in trouble, guys!”

  “Maddie, you are a stress puppy,” Egg said. Drew nodded in agreement.

  Madison gave them both another nasty look and they all went back to their computer screens.

  Of course Madison was overly sensitive these days to begin with. She missed her parents. Both of them were gone for work this week.

  Dad was out of town on business, all the way across the country. He was meeting with the design firm that had helped set up his Web site. He was launching a new business again. Madison couldn’t remember what exactly it was going to be.

  Mom had left yesterday. She’d headed overseas on a business trip for Budge Films, a movie production company that made small nature documentaries. During the summer, Madison had been able to travel along with her mom on another journey—to South America—to film rare tree frogs. But there was no more traveling allowed together now, not during school days.

  Mom always said, “You have more important things to take care of during the school year, Maddie. Like getting your junior high diploma.”

  So while Mom was meeting with lots of French people and eating plates of pommes frites, Madison stayed put in Far Hills. She and her dog, Phin, were camped out for the duration at Aimee’s house.

  Staying at Aimee’s was a treat. Aimee Anne Gillespie wasn’t just Madison Francesca Finn’s best friend. Madison liked to think of her as a sister. They had known each other since birth.

  “Um, Mrs. Wing? Could you help me out with this?” Egg was mooning in the teacher’s direction again. Madison wanted to gag. He may have acted all tough and smart, but in computer class Egg was definitely soft-boiled.

  While the rest of the class continued working on their assignment, Madison tried to sneak online. The system connected, but she couldn’t get on to her favorite site, TweenBlurt.com.

  No Access! See your Cybrarian!

  On these classroom computers, there were built-in blocks preventing students from online access except at designated times. Madison knew Mrs. Wing had put up all the blocks. She knew how to keep everyone focused on the assignment and only the assignment—didn’t she?

  This was going to be a long week.

  Madison could feel the low dull ache that burns inside when you really, really miss someone.

  And it wasn’t just Mom or Dad.

  Madison missed her purple blow-up chair, her file cabinet, her miles of files, and all her other stuff. Madison missed the way her bare feet felt on Mom’s wood floors and the way the kitchen table rocked on one side when you leaned on it. She missed the way her pug Phinnie liked to curl up in front of the dishwasher during the dry cycle.

  Right now, thinking about it too much, Madison missed everything about home. Or at least about the way home had used to be, when Mom and Dad were still together.

  “Psssst!” Drew suddenly whispered over to Madison. “Are you having trouble getting online?”

  Madison nodded. She was having all kinds of trouble. But she was glad to know she wasn’t the only one bored with the assignment.

  “I know a secret back entrance,” he said, still whispering so Mrs. Wing couldn’t hear. “I can tell you the secret password that only the teachers are supposed to know.”

  “Oh really? Then how do you—?”

  Madison dropped her head down a lit
tle because Mrs. Wing was slowly making her way over to their desks.

  Brrrrrrrrring.

  The cybrarian code would have to be cracked later.

  “And we are outta here!” Madison’s brain whirred as she zipped up her orange backpack.

  “Uh, Madison Finn, could you hold on a moment?” Mrs. Wing held up her hand for Madison to wait around. Everyone else who was still in the room stopped and stared.

  “Oooo, you’re in trouble now!” Egg whispered.

  “Oh, shut up,” Madison grunted under her breath. She scratched her cheek. It was so hot. Everything was happening in slo-mo.

  “Later for you, Maddie.” Egg was ready to walk out.

  “Want us to hang outside?” Drew said to Madison. “I mean, we can wait here in the hall.”

  Egg was getting impatient. “Come on, Drew-fus. Let’s make like a tree—”

  “Don’t leave!” Madison buzzed. “What do you guys think she wants? Do you think she knows I was trying to get online? I mean, I know I shouldn’t have been working on my own disk in class, but do you guys think—”

  Madison had never ever been asked to stay after class. And she had never ever ever been asked to do it in front of a whole bunch of kids either, let alone ones who didn’t know her. It was the worst moment of seventh grade so far. Madison was panicked.

  Drew shrugged. “Maddie, it’s probably nothing.”

  Egg looked over at Mrs. Wing. “I wish she was keeping me after class.”

  Oh boy.

  Chapter 2

  MADISON SLUMPED INTO A blue chair near Mrs. Wing’s desk.

  She felt blue, too.

  “Madison, I noticed you seemed a little distracted in class,” Mrs. Wing began.

  “Distracted?” Madison repeated with concern. She gazed over Mrs. Wing’s head so she wouldn’t have to look her in the eye. As usual, she expected the worst kind of news.