Faye Meredith - Becoming Edward

by Faye Meredith

  ‘But why did you say you didn’t have Rachel’s number?’

  ‘Sorry about that,’ Clive lied again. He was getting good at it. ‘It’s just I don’t really know you so I was a bit reluctant about giving out Rachel’s number.’

  ‘Hey, don’t worry about it, I understand. I’d have probably done the same thing. Rachel’s on her way into town. I’m going to meet up with her for a coffee.’

  ‘Great.’ If Clive’s grip got any tighter on his mobile it would explode.

  ‘You can say hi to her,’ Lewis replied.

  ‘Yes. Yes I can.’ Clive’s lips went tighter than an elastic band about to snap. Who the hell did this guy think he was? Rachel was his friend. He had known her for years. He didn’t need some posh bloke giving him permission to say hi to her.

  ‘What are you two up to then?’ asked Clive.

  Lewis went quiet for a second.

  ‘We’ve just got some, er, important things to discuss.’

  ‘Really. I thought you only met each other last week.’

  ‘Yeah, we did but I think we’ve got a lot in common.’

  ‘Oh yeah? Like what?’

  ‘Er, well …’

  Clive had Lewis on the ropes and he knew it. Lewis had nothing in common with Rachel. He didn’t even know her. He was just another randy teenager who wanted to get off with her. At that point, Clive’s supervisor came out.

  ‘Clive, we need a little help in here please.’

  ‘Yeah coming,’ shouted Clive. ‘See you later,’ he said to Lewis and tried to give him a hard stare, as if to broadcast that he knew what he was up to. But Clive didn’t have a mean bone in his body and it looked more like constipation than aggression.

  When he got to the tills, Ginster was already there.

  ‘Hey, who was that guy you were talking to?’

  ‘No-one,’ replied Clive.

  ‘Is he a friend?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Do you think he would be my friend?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘He’s really cool. It’s like Brad Pitt and George Clooney had a baby or something. I’d like a friend like him. Maybe I’d get some girl action if I hung around with someone like that.’

  ‘Would you shut up!’ Clive raised his voice and several customers looked up from the books they were reading.

  ‘I’m just stating facts is all,’ said Ginster. ‘Hey, she’s doing it again.’

  ‘Who’s doing what?’

  Ginster nodded towards Lynn who was looking over in their direction and smiling. Clive looked back at her and several books slid off the top of the pile she was carrying.

  *

  Rachel shut her mobile and clutched it as the bus swayed her gently towards town. Everything had been so simple before Lewis had rung. She was coming to terms with the fact that he wasn’t the one. This wasn’t easy as she wanted it to be him so much, but after what she’d seen and heard on Saturday night, he was certainly no Edward Cullen. This was a decision of the head of course. It was a logical solution to a problem.

  But her heart felt otherwise.

  The fact that Lewis had called and asked to meet up had sent sparks of electricity around her body. It felt like pure magic being poured into her blood. Beneath all her common sense and reasoning, she still wanted him just as badly as before. Trouble was, her head was screaming at her not to fall for him. It was a terrible schizophrenia, especially as Rachel was now trying to work out what she should say to him.

  One thing was obvious; she knew he must like her. Why else would he go to the trouble of tracking down Clive and getting her number off him? That should have put her mind at some sort of rest. Instead it just threw up more complications. She now had to make a decision. Would she take a leap of faith and see him again or would she cut it short and move on? As the bus pulled into town she was still undecided.

  Rachel headed into Books ‘n’ Beans. She walked past the tills.

  ‘Hi, Rachel,’ said Clive.

  Rachel turned, gave him a little wave and carried on walking. She didn’t want to get into a conversation with anyone at the moment. There were too many conversations and discussions already going on inside her head.

  As she reached the coffee shop at the back of the store, she saw Lewis reclining on a large sofa. He looked like a Roman emperor, regal and majestic. As soon as he saw her, he jumped up and flashed her a perfect smile.

  Whatever happened, this was going to be difficult.

  ‘Hi Rachel, do you want a latte or a cappuccino or something?’ he asked.

  ‘I’ll have a small cappuccino, please.’

  She took a seat and watched him queue up to order. He stood out a mile, like a movie star who’d just stepped out of a film and into the real world.

  Lewis returned with the two drinks and sat down. He had a huge latte in a bucket-sized cup. Rachel watched as he poured sachet after sachet of sugar into his drink.

  ‘Like coffee with your sugar?’ she asked.

  Lewis laughed nervously into his drink and then took a giant slurp. He winced and swallowed hard.

  ‘You okay?’ said Rachel. ‘You look like you’re in pain.’

  ‘Yeah, probably should have waited for it to cool down.’

  They both smiled and looked away from each other. The store was full of customers and Rachel pretended to people watch. An uncomfortable silence grew between them. It was like being back on the beach all over again. Rachel was reminded of what had happened last time. The memory of the two men and their little sister still hadn’t gone away.

  ‘So, er, how are you?’ Lewis asked.

  ‘I’m good. How are you?’ she replied.

  ‘I’m good too. Is your asthma okay?’

  ‘Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry, I get these little attacks every now and then.’

  ‘That’s good,’ said Lewis. ‘I mean it’s not good. But it’s good that, you know, that it’s only now and again. I think that came out a bit wrong.’

  ‘It’s okay I know what you meant.’

  ‘Look, I didn’t get a chance to thank you the other night.’

  ‘Thank me? What for?’

  ‘Suggesting the Twilight box set. My sister loves it. She’s already hooked on them.’

  ‘That’s brilliant.’

  ‘Yeah and it’s all thanks to you. I mean she got a brand new Beetle for her birthday but she seems more interested in reading than driving.’

  ‘Well they are addictive. Cassie thinks I’m obsessed with them.’

  ‘Really? Are they that good?’

  ‘Yeah, I absolutely adore them,’ Rachel said, leaning forward. Talk of Twilight always got her excited. ‘You should read them.’

  ‘I’m not much of a reader,’ said Lewis, mirroring her body language.

  ‘Don’t worry, they’re real page-turners. You’d love them.’

  ‘But isn’t it more of a girls book?’

  ‘Well it’s romantic, and I suppose every girl loves Edward.’

  ‘Does that include you?’

  ‘Guilty as charged,’ Rachel said holding her hands up as if admitting to a crime. ‘But there’s lots of action in it too.’

  ‘I think I’ll give them a go, if I can persuade Olivia to let them out of her sight.’

  Rachel could feel her guard slipping again. It hadn’t taken him long to find a breach in her defences. She needed to be more careful.

  ‘Listen, do you fancy grabbing something to eat one night?’ Lewis asked.

  After the easy conversation they were having, the question felt out of place. Like a juggernaut driving through a quiet village. He wasn’t asking her out formally, but going out for dinner usually led to that sort of thing. If she said yes, it was like saying she would consider going out with him further down the line.

  ‘Er, I’m okay at the moment, so no. But thank you anyway,’ Rachel said.

  She had no idea where those words had come from. She had wanted to say yes but her lips had moved independently of her
brain. Maybe it was a safety measure triggered by her subconscious to protect her from getting hurt. She wanted so much to have dinner with him and be his friend and eventually his girlfriend, but she just couldn’t do it. Not after Saturday night. This wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. He was not her Edward.

  ‘Oh. Alright,’ Lewis replied. ‘No worries.’ His voice trembled a little and he kept breaking into nervous smiles, the kind where your lips curve up but your eyes don’t join in.

  ‘Sorry. I’ve just got loads on at the moment,’ said Rachel.

  ‘That’s fine, I understand.’

  Rachel stood up and swallowed the rest of her coffee. She had to leave now. It was all getting rather uncomfortable.

  ‘Are you going already?’ Lewis asked.

  ‘Yeah, sorry. Like I said, I’ve got loads on at the moment. Thanks for the coffee though.’

  ‘Sure. Hey, no problem at all. It’s been really great to see you,’ said Lewis, standing up as well.

  Rachel threw her bag over her shoulder and rushed towards the exit.

  As she passed the tills, she saw Clive. He smiled at her enthusiastically.

  ‘Hi Rachel,’ he said.

  But Rachel didn’t stop. She strode past him and managed a little smile of some sort, to acknowledge his presence. She couldn’t stay in this place. She needed to be alone with her thoughts.

  The streets were busy and noisy. Shoppers with too many bags jostled for space on the pavement. As people passed her, she caught little snippets of their conversations about what they were going to buy next. It kept interrupting her train of thought. Didn’t these people have anything better to talk about? She needed some peace and quiet.

  Rachel knew just where to go. She walked towards St Peter’s, a large steepled church set in wooded grounds - a little island of calm in amongst the bustle of town. Rachel loved it because the author of Frankenstein, Mary Shelley, was buried here. Halfway up one of the small green hills of the churchyard sat a modest stone tomb about the height of a coffee table. It was peppered with lichen and had a gentle slope on its top, like the roof of a house. It was where Mary Shelley had been finally laid to rest in 1851.

  Frankenstein was one of Rachel’s favourite books and she would often sit on the bench next to the tomb when she needed a place to think or be inspired. Now, she sat down on the scarred wood and looked out over the deserted churchyard. Her mind was a mess and she couldn’t believe what she’d just done. It felt wrong - like finding a suitcase of money and leaving it where you’d found it. Had she made a mistake?

  Rachel thought about the alternative. Supposing she had said yes and had started going out with him. Well that would have been just as wrong. It was a no-win situation. She wanted him but she couldn’t have him because of what he was like. It all sounded a bit familiar, like Bella Swan and Edward. They couldn’t be together because Edward was a vampire, which was romantic in a beautifully tragic sort of way. However, Rachel’s situation was far less glamorous. She couldn’t be with Lewis because he was an unfaithful slapper. It didn’t have the same ring to it as lusting after a gorgeous vampire.

  Rachel thought about this for a while, and the more she thought about it the more she realised she’d made the right decision. Even though it had been a difficult one to make.

  She sat for a while and let the sun warm her pale cheeks. Hungry, she reached into her bag to pull out an apple and as she did so a plastic sleeve full of paper fell out on to the ground. She picked it up and saw it was the story Clive had written. She had been so obsessed with Lewis and last weekend’s events that she’d completely forgotten about it. Rachel took a bite of her apple and began to read.

  *

  Clive stood at the tills squinting to see what was going on at the back of the store. It was a pointless exercise. Unless he had lip-read skills or the hearing of a superhero, there was no way he’d be able to make out what was being said between Lewis and Rachel.

  They both seemed to be smiling a lot. Lewis was sucking down gallons of coffee from a ridiculously large mug. Definitely trying to compensate for something.

  Try as hard as he might to make himself feel better, part of him had already resigned himself to the fact that he’d already lost Rachel. What had he been thinking? He had never had her in the first place. She was always going to choose Lewis, or someone like him.

  Clive had previously thought that because Rachel was intelligent, smart, passionate and sensitive, someone like him might have a chance with her. But in the end, girls were all the same. They either went for blokes who were good-looking or blokes who were rich. Rachel had hit the jackpot and found someone who was both. He couldn’t really blame her. I mean, what did Clive have to offer her? Unpredictable hair, a Saturday job and his trashy vampire story. He wasn’t exactly a catch.

  Judging by Rachel’s non-reaction to him this morning, Clive was already being pushed out of the picture, even as a friend. This made him feel sad. He loved being friends with Rachel. He loved talking to her and being around her. Admittedly, a lot of that was because she was beautiful. But even if she wasn’t, they would have still been best friends.

  Now Lewis was going to take that away from him. Why were rich people always so greedy? They had to have everything. There was no way Rachel would want to hang around with dull old Clive now she had posh friends to impress.

  Suddenly Clive saw some movement. Rachel got up from the table and left abruptly. A little flame of optimism flared into life. It looked like Rachel had had enough of talking to Mr Cheekbones. This could be a good sign for Clive; maybe all wasn’t lost.

  ‘Hi, Rachel,’ Clive said as she hurried past him.

  Rachel virtually ignored him. And with that, the little flame of optimism inside Clive was snuffed out.

  Rachel had at least spent some time talking with Lewis, but she hadn’t even stopped to say hello to Clive. It was pretty obvious. She had given Clive a cold shoulder that was positively arctic. That idiotic stunt with the story must have done it. She probably saw through his ulterior motive for writing it and was avoiding him on purpose so he wouldn’t get the wrong idea. He realised that nearly ignoring him was Rachel’s way of dropping a massive hint. Like saying, nice try but you’re not in the running.

  Several emotions battled for supremacy in Clive’s head: There was sadness, because he had just come to the conclusion that the two of them weren’t going to be together, regardless of whether Lewis was in the picture or not. Why had he not seen this earlier? He now realised that he had been absurdly optimistic. He’d have had more luck asking Angelina Jolie out. And this made him feel his second powerful emotion - stupidity. To be fair, this one wasn’t affecting him as badly as the others because Clive was quite used to feeling stupid all the time. In fact, he always had a background feeling of ridiculousness buzzing away in his head like a Geiger counter. It was just that, at this precise moment, the volume had been turned up to maximum. Anger was a close third, almost neck and neck with stupidity. In typical Clive style, he was angry with himself for actually believing he’d had a chance with her. Every time he thought like this it would swiftly bring him back to feeling stupid again, which was why these two emotions were vying so closely for second position.

  Clive looked at his watch. It was only ten o’clock and he had another eight hours of standing trapped behind a till with all this rubbish in his head. It was going to be a long day.

  Chapter 9

  *

  As Lewis drove home after his meeting with Rachel, he was praying that someone would cut him up. He wanted to have a fight. Road rage would give him all the excuse he needed to take out his frustration on someone else. But the roads flowed smoothly and every time he came to a junction, all the drivers he encountered were polite and considerate.

  Lewis was normally mellow and easy going. He had nothing to be angry about in his life. But today was different. A furious whirlpool spun around inside him. He had been rejected for a second time by Rachel. The first time was diffe
rent. At the party he hadn’t been sure if it was rejection or whether she had merely slipped off and he’d missed saying goodbye. It had been more confusing than upsetting. This time it was definite and face to face, there was no doubt whatsoever. Rachel did not want him. End of story. Lewis didn’t know whether to cry or kill something.

  If a hedgehog had crossed the road in front of him it wouldn’t have got to the other side.

  Why didn’t she like him? Every girl liked him. What had he done? Was it his personality? His looks? He just didn’t know. One thing was for sure. It wasn’t going to end here. He would do everything he could to get Rachel. If he needed to change, he would. If he needed to get a job, then he would. Whatever it takes, he thought, whatever it takes.

  As he pulled into the driveway, he saw Seth’s van loaded up with surfboards. Seth was leaning against it. Lewis parked alongside him and got out.

  ‘Mate, where the hell have you been?’ said Seth.

  ‘Out,’ Lewis snapped.

  ‘I’ve been trying to get hold of you. Kimmeridge is going off. The waves are mental overhead. We need to get over there now otherwise we’ll miss it.’

  ‘I’m not going.’

  ‘What? Are you crazy?’

  ‘I said I’m not going.’

  ‘Why the hell not?’

  ‘I’m not in the mood.’

  ‘You’re going to miss classic Kimmeridge.’

  ‘I don’t care.’

  ‘Oh, I get it. It’s that stupid girl at the party, isn’t it?’

  The second the words were out of his mouth, Lewis flung himself at Seth. But Seth had been in too many fights to be caught off guard. He grabbed Lewis in a bear hug and wouldn’t let go.

  ‘Get off me,’ shouted Lewis.

  ‘Take it easy. Look I’m sorry. I didn’t know you felt like that about her.’

  ‘Okay, Okay just let go of me.’

  Seth slowly released Lewis from his grip.

  ‘Are you cool?’ asked Seth.

  ‘Not really, I’m a mess.’

  ‘Yeah, I can see that. What happened?’