Lilja's Library

by Hans-Ake Lilja

  Lilja’s final words about LT’s Theory of Pets (audio)

  This is a story that is best enjoyed listened to and not read, if you ask me. I heard it out in the sun with my earphones on and let me tell you, it was great!

  If you were to buy this audiobook, I would recommend you try to get the version called Stephen King Live! instead. The story is the same; it’s recorded at the same time and place. The difference is that you also get an interview with King on Stephen King Live!

  “A broken spoon may become a fork.” (LT’s Theory of Pets)

  ****

  Black House

  Posted: October 27, 2001

  Black House is supposed to be a continuation of The Talisman. Isn’t it? I’m not so sure. I feel that Black House is more of a Dark Tower book than a Talisman book, which I think is a bit sad. I love The Talisman and was really psyched when I heard that there was going to be a sequel. Later, when I heard that the sequel, Black House, would contain a lot of Dark Tower stuff, I got really skeptical.

  Personally, I never thought that The Talisman was connected to The Dark Tower. I always felt that it was a book that stood on its own. Please don’t misunderstand me now. I love everything that is connected to The Dark Tower and I look forward to every new installment with joy and enormous excitement. I do not, however, feel that The Dark Tower has the right to take over The Talisman world, which I feel it does in Black House.

  If you would change Jack’s name to something else and make some other minor changes to the story, this would be a Dark Tower book instead of a sequel to The Talisman, right? That was not what I wanted and expected when I started the book…I was expecting to meet more of the things, places and characters that I know from The Talisman.

  OK, let’s put The Dark Tower aspect of the book aside for a while and focus on the rest of the story. Personally, I really like the plot with the Fisherman and his gruesome crimes. I also like the fact that Black House has some extremely good characters. I’m, of course, thinking of the motorcycle gang, The Thunderous Five, and the reporter, Wendell Green. They are all great characters. The best of them all, though, is Henry Leyden—man, what a character! He is perfectly portrayed in the book! Too bad he probably won’t appear in another one…

  The only thing I don’t like about the book’s plot is how Jack and his gang rescue Ty from Mr. Munshun. As the story builds towards the climax, I get the feeling that Mr. Munshun is a strong creature that will give Jack one hell of a fight about Ty. One that might even claim some victims along the way. Then, when the battle happens, it goes so fast you really can’t believe that it actually did happen. Jack is beating Mr. Munshun (in his own backyard) like he was a ninety-year-old fart who couldn’t hurt a fly even if his life depended on it. I feel this is the weakest moment in the book.

  Other than that I don’t have anything to complain about when it comes to the book’s story. I love the narrative way King and Straub tell the story. It’s a really interesting and unusual way to tell a story. Great work!

  The book’s ending gives a really good indication that there will be a third book released eventually. My fear, though, is that one will be even more like a Dark Tower book than a sequel to Black House, which would be unfort-unate.

  Lilja’s final words about Black House

  If you read Black House thinking that you will read a sequel to The Talisman and are expecting to join Jack on new adventures in the Territories, then you will be disappointed.

  If you read Black House thinking that you will read just a new King book, expecting all the great things that come with a new King book, then you will love this book.

  If you read Black House thinking that you will learn more about The Dark Tower, then you too will love this book.

  ****

  Everything’s Eventual

  Posted: March 16, 2002

  In Everything’s Eventual, King’s fourth collection, there are only stories that are previously published. How do I feel about that? Well, I would have loved to have an unpublished one among them, no doubt about that, but on the other hand most of the stories here are so good that they deserve their place in this collection.

  The best one by far (and probably the best short story King has written to date) is “Autopsy Room Four.” “Autopsy Room Four” tells the story of Howard Cottrell, who wakes up on an autopsy table after a round of golf, unable to move as the doctors around him prepare to do an, you guessed it, autopsy. This short story is the best King has written, as well as the most chilling and frightening one in the collection.

  “Autopsy Room Four” was first published in the very limited edition of King’s Six Stories back in 1997. Everything’s Eventual also contains four of the other five stories from that collection (“Blind Willie” was published, in a slightly altered form, in Hearts in Atlantis): “The Man in the Black Suit,” “L.T.’s Theory of Pets,” “Lunch at the Gotham Café” and “Luckey Quarter.”

  You could almost say that Everything’s Eventual is a gathering of King’s smaller and stranger collections that have been released in the last few years. You have the already mentioned Six Stories, but you also have the stories from the audio collection Blood and Smoke: “Lunch at the Gotham Café” (which was also in Six Stories), “In the Deathroom” and “1408.”

  Besides getting these smaller collections together, Everything’s Eventual also gathers up most of the stories that King has published in magazines (primarily The New Yorker) and other places. You have the recently published “The Death of Jack Hamilton” which tells the story of how gangster Jack Hamilton died. No one knows exactly how he died, but it’s certainly possible that it happened the way King tells it…

  You also find The Dark Tower story “The Little Sisters of Eluria” collected here. This is a story that you can read without having read the other Dark Tower books. It doesn’t hurt if you have, though, and I’m sure it will play a big role in the big picture later on as the story of Roland unfolds.

  We also get the title story, “Everything’s Eventual.” Personally, I think one of the stronger stories (like “Autopsy Room Four”) should have gotten the honor of naming the collection, but I guess that’s really not that important. This story was supposed to get its first publication on the Stephen King software F13. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on what you think about F13) the otherwise pretty lame software was delayed and Fantasy & Science Fiction got to be the first to publish it, which I personally felt was a blessing. This story is also said to possibly be connected to The Dark Tower.

  Another story is “That Feeling, You Can Only Say What It Is in French,” which takes the concept of déjà vu to a new height and tells the tale of a traveling couple where the wife gets to relive things over and over again. It really gets you to think one extra time the next time you get that feeling. I have been here before…

  These are the strong stories of Everything’s Eventual, even if “L.T.’s Theory of Pets” is better when you hear King read it than it is if you read it yourself. Unfortunately, there are also some not-as-good stories in Everything’s Eventual. “All That You Love Will Be Carried Away” was recently published in The New Yorker, and when I read it the first time I really hated the fact that I didn’t get to know what happened to Alfie. I felt that King had taken the easy way out of this one. When I read it this time I appreciated it more though. I felt that I could better understand what King was after and that I missed a bit of it the first time I read the story. I’m not entirely as unhappy with the ending as I was, so maybe it’s unfair of me to say that it’s one of the weaker stories in Everything’s Eventual, but I’m gonna stick with my first feeling here. I guess that the more you read this story, the more you’re going to appreciate it.

  The last two stories both suffer somewhat from the same problem as “All That You Love Will Be Carried Away”: they both have weak endings. With “The Road Virus Heads North” it feels like King was in a hurry to get the ending done. He starts the build-up of the story in his usual
careful way and takes his time. When it gets to the end, though, it feels rushed. “The Road Virus Heads North” is the story that suffers most from this, I think. The encounter at the end of the story almost fades away to nothing.

  The last story is “Riding the Bullet.” Personally, I hope, and think, that the story gets a better chance here, though, than it got when it was first published. “Riding the Bullet” was first published on the Internet and, unfortunately, people were more interested in how many had downloaded it, how much money King had made on it and most importantly, was this the end of the paper book? Not many cared for the story itself, and even though I think it’s a bit weak at the end (I was expecting a more exciting finale), I feel it deserves a second chance, which it gets here.

  None of these three are in any way bad stories. They are just a little bit weaker than the others

  Besides the stories Everything’s Eventual offers, it also contains a short note by King in which he tells us how the stories got their order in the book, which is quite fascinating. Personally, I wish he had told us all the stories he chooses from and why “The Old Dude’s Ticker” didn’t make it into the book.

  The book also contains an introduction called “Practicing the (Almost) Lost Art,” in which King tells us how he feels about the short story and how he thinks it might be a dying art form.

  Before or after every story (depending on if it spoils the story or not) you’ll find short commentaries by King. These are always nice to read—especially the one for “The Little Sisters of Eluria,” where he says that The Dark Tower V is done!

  Lilja’s final words about Everything’s Eventual

  Even if you have already read most or all of the stories in Everything’s Eventual, I think you should get this collection. The stories in it are some of the best King has written, especially “Autopsy Room Four.” All the others are really good stories, and the ones that aren’t are great stories!

  If you haven’t read the stories in Everything’s Eventual, then there isn’t much to talk about—go get the book today! You won’t regret it. I personally think that this is King’s most even collection to date.

  ****

  Everything’s Eventual (audio)

  Posted: April 6, 2002

  When I got Everything’s Eventual on audio, the story I looked forward to most was “Autopsy Room Four” since that one is my favorite King short story. Now that I have listened to all five, I still like “Autopsy Room Four” the most, but found myself enjoying the other four tremendously. Far more than I imagined before listening to them.

  All of the stories in this audio collection (except one) are really strong, and that helped this audio in being as enjoyable as it is. The best of the five is “Autopsy Room Four,” read by Oliver Platt. He is perfect for this story and really makes you think about how it would be to end up in the situation that Howard Cottrell finds himself in: flung up on an autopsy table, feeling the cutters at your belly and not being able to move…not a very pleasant feeling. I also really like when he sings like The Rolling Stones, which is worth the money this audio costs alone. It’s really hilarious.

  The first story on the audio is the title story, “Everything’s Eventual,” read by Justin Long. This story is written/read in first-person and Justin really is Dinky, no question about it. I’m not aware of how old Justin is in real life, but here he is perfect as the young computer-killer with a conscience. You really get the feeling that he is telling you something he’s experienced and not just reading from a paper.

  Story number three is “The Little Sisters of Eluria”—the longest story in the collection. “The Little Sisters of Eluria” is narrated by Boyd Gaines, whose performance does not satisfy me one hundred percent. I don’t have much to complain about though. I’m happy with his voice as he reads the story, but he doesn’t sound like I imagine Roland sounds. This isn’t a big problem though (and may only affect me), and after a while you get rather used to his version of Roland, even though it’s not one hundred percent accurate. He does portray the little sisters tremendously well though.

  The fourth story, “The Road Virus Heads North,” is read by Jay O. Sanders. Jay does a good job reading the story, but as I stated in my review of the book, this isn’t one of my favorites. That’s not Jay’s fault though. He does, as I said, do a good job with it and, the fact is, I found myself enjoying it better here than when I read it myself. I’m not sure why, but it’s still the case.

  The last of the stories in this audio edition is “Luckey Quarter,” read by Judith Ivey (last seen in King’s miniseries Rose Red). She is the only female reader in this collection, and since the story is told by a female character, I’m really happy that they didn’t choose a man to read this one. Judith, like the others, does a really great job with this story. She really sounds like an old, tired and frustrated hotel maid.

  Lilja’s final words about Everything’s Eventual (audio)

  Go out and get the audio edition of Everything’s Eventual, put on your headphones and enjoy!

  ****

  Riding the Bullet (audio)

  Posted: May 30, 2002

  Those of you who have read my review of Everything’s Eventual know that “Riding the Bullet” isn’t my favorite short story by King and that I feel it’s a bit weak at the end. Personally, I was expecting a more exciting finale than we get.

  In audio format the ending is still a bit weak, but Josh Hamilton does a great job reading it. His voice is perfect for reading books and he reveals various nuances of the different characters—there isn’t anything worse than when a reader uses the same voice for all of the characters. My favorite voice is his version of George Staub. He really gets that creepy tone in his voice that you would expect from a fellow like Staub when he reads his lines.

  “Riding the Bullet” is the story of Alan Parker, who is hitchhiking from the University of Maine to Lewiston, Maine, where his mother lies in the hospital (the same one that King was in after his accident back in 1999) with a stroke.

  On the way, he gets a ride with a man named George Staub. Fairly quickly, both Alan and we understand that there is something really wrong with Staub—he seems to know a lot about Alan, and as they speed towards Lewiston he forces Alan to make the hardest choice of his life…maybe the last one of his life…depending on his answer.

  The story includes a moral theme: sometimes you have hard choices to make without always knowing which is right. Then, when you have made your choice, you always spend a lot of time wondering if you made the right one…

  Lilja’s final words about Riding the Bullet (audio)

  “Riding the Bullet” gets better and better each time I hear/read it. I don’t know if it’s me who is a bit slow to get to the point, but the more I hear/read it the more I appreciate what King is trying to say at the end. I still think it should have a creepier ending, but I’m starting to appreciate the dramatic ending more and more. So, my advice to you is: don’t miss this one!

  ****

  The Wavedancer Benefit (audio)

  Posted: July 15, 2002

  The Wavedancer Benefit was an event put together by Stephen King to help his friend, and audiobook reader, Frank Muller after he had an accident on his motorcycle. The accident left Muller in a really bad state and his medical bills were going to be high.

  So, to help him out, King got together with John Grisham, Peter Straub and Pat Conroy and performed at a benefit that was held on February 2, 2002, at Town Hall in New York. All four authors appeared for free and they each read or talked for about twenty to thirty minutes. First out was John Grisham.

  Grisham first held a rather funny introduction in which he talked about King. He talks about when King stayed at the Grishams and how he felt when King was injured in the accident a few years back. He then read from his book The Summons.

  After Grisham it was Straub’s turn. He read from the book Black House that he wrote with King. Unfortunately, he read a pretty grim part of the book and even though t
he part itself is good, it didn’t feel right in the spirit of the event. Personally, I would have chosen a different part of the book; there are better suited parts.

  Then it was King’s turn. King was supposed to read from Black House as well, but changed his mind. Instead he read “The Revenge of Lardass Hogan,” which is part of the short story “The Body,” which can be found in the collection Different Seasons. The reason he did this was because Muller had enjoyed recording the story. For those of you who haven’t heard or read this one, I can tell you that it’s hilarious. Personally, I think that King is a great reader and he certainly proves it here. At one point he improvises while reading and you can hear that the audience likes it as much as I do.

  Pat Conroy was last out. He is the only one who doesn’t read from one of his books. Instead, he tells the story of how he got his first book published. I haven’t read anything by Conroy and I have never heard him before, but I must say that he steals the show completely! His performance is the one that is the most fun, even if King and Grisham talk about King’s close followers. The way he talks about the first time he hears how much he’s getting for the book made me howl with laughter.

  Erica Muller talks, and her and Frank’s daughter keeps interrupting and asking what she is doing. Even though it’s rather funny, it really gives the situation a touching feeling. You really feel that this is a real person and you really feel how Erica is suffering…

  Lilja’s final words about The Wavedancer Benefit (audio)

  This is a chance for you to hear four great authors speak and to help Frank Muller, a man who has given us many hours of enjoyment by recording books on tape—don’t miss it! Then, when you have listened in and enjoyed all the performances, you might feel that you want more and start reading works from one or more of the authors you’ve just heard. I know I will. So, you see, buying this audiobook is a win-win situation for everyone: you will get two hours of great entertainment, and Frank Muller will get the help he deserves! Buy it today!