by Paul Kelly
With that, Robert got up and walked out of the cafe leaving Freya standing alone with a serviette in her hand. She watched him go as he closed the door behind him, but a tear fell down her cheek and she used the serviette to dry her face,
“Why?” ... “Why?” she screamed and a cup fell to the floor as she slammed the table hard with her fist. “I love you Robert Peterson and I don’t give a damn what you think,” she shouted into the air.
As she left the café that evening after her duties and locked the door, Freya wondered what was going to happen to her. It was obvious that this man Peterson wasn’t just going to walk out of her life, regardless of what he thought. Freya could feel such a strong love for him that she knew with her female instinct that it would never end as he supposed it would. She could see nothing further down the road of love, but she would never give up and she decided to keep her cool and let nature take its course, knowing that sooner or later, Robert would accept that she was more to him that just a part time waitress. With luck and a few little prayers, it might be sooner, but as she got into bed that night, she cried herself to sleep, thinking of Robert; of how sweet and kind he was and cursing the day she ever met Sammy Boyle.
Chapter Seven
Two weeks later and with no sign of Robert, Freya decided that she would take the bull by the horns and telephone him at his home address. It was on a Saturday afternoon and she was just about to hand the keys over to Jenny who was doing the late shift when she spotted an unsightly guest in the corner of the cafe, sitting smugly, cross legged and looking at her as if she was the only woman around.
“What are you doing here?” she asked and Sammy Boyle uncrossed his legs and smiled at her.
“Looking for what one looks for in a cafe,” he said, “Any objections?”
“I’m due to be off duty shortly, so if there is anything you legitimately want, tell me now and then I’ll go,” she snapped but Sammy continued to smile.
“I was in earlier but you weren’t here, so I decided to come back again later. I’m sure you don’t mind,” said Sammy, but Freya moved away from where he was standing, “Now, now then, that’s no way to treat your husband,” he gloated, but Freya wasn’t amused.
“Ex,” she snapped back, “And don’t you ever forget it.”
“Come, come now, don’t be so uppity. That’s not the sweet little Freya I know, is it?”
Freya ignored his remarks and waited for his order.
“This is a cafe; not a knocking shop, in case you haven’t noticed,” she said, emphasising her sarcasm with a firm nod of her head, but Sammy Boyle dismissed her attitude as he continued to drink his coffee.
“I was in here the day before yesterday as well ... just to see if all was well with you” . . . ..Sammy stared at her over his cup
“And is he as handsome as me?” he asked with a sneer and Freya froze where she stood. Did Sammy know about Robert and if he did, how did he get that information. Jenny couldn’t have told him as she hadn’t recognized Robert when Jenny had spoken to her.
“Oh! now that would be asking for a miracle, wouldn’t it?” she replied, and decided to play at Sammy’s game, but Sammy became annoyed when she said what she did as he clashed his cup into the saucer and his face became hard.
“No need for that. I just hope he’s treating you right, that’s all.” he said and
Freya laughed aloud.
“Well that wouldn’t be hard to do after what I went through with you, would it?” she demanded and Sammy narrowed his eyes as his lips tightened.
“Still as bloody cheeky, I see,” he said, “No respect as usual.”
Freya sighed and raised her shoulders.
“Just get out,” she barked, “I’ve no time for wasters here.”
But as Sammy rose to leave the cafe, he looked back at Freya as she cleared his table.
“Be kind to him and he won’t treat you like another whore,” he said as he closed the door, but not before leaving Freya his business card.
Freya went to the wash room and threw some cold water over her face, but as she looked in the mirror, she could see that her ex-husband had got under her skin again, as indeed he always did. She grabbed her coat and was about to leave when she noticed the card and stuffed it hurriedly into her pocket just when Jenny came in.
“Did you see him?” she asked, “That handsome guy who just left the joint,”
but Freya ignored her comments.
“I’ve left the keys in the safe,” she said as she walked towards the cafe door.
There was no way she would consider Sammy Boyle to be in any way handsome ... not after the way he had treated her, even if she had considered that he might have been good looking at one time, regardless of what he thought of himself and then she stopped for a moment and watched the traffic go by. It was as if her memory sped past her with the cars that raced along the road. Yes, she had to admit, although it pained her to do so ...there was a time when she thought Sammy was handsome. Yes, indeed there was and yet when she looked at him that few moments ago in the cafe where she worked, she could see nothing of the man she had married those few long years ago. He was like a total stranger to her now. She saw a face that repulsed her; a face that sneered and derided her as he had always done in the two years they had been married. It was the face of a waster; a man, if you could call him that, who lived for himself in everything he did and thought. It was Sammy Boyle first and last in everything and she knew now that he had never loved her as she did love him after a fashion in the beginning when she was so naive. She had been his ‘plaything’ as so many others had been and who had come after her ... or before ... She could never quite fathom it out. Sammy was only good for time keeping when the meals were on the table and when he wanted her in bed. Three times a night was nothing to him and he boasted of that to all his so-called friends in the pubs at night.
Freya hoped he was happy with his lot now and didn’t want him near her, but why was he so interested in her love life all of a sudden? Could he possibly be jealous? or was it rather than he didn’t want to lose any of his conquests? ... and it was then that she remembered the card he had left at the cafe. She smiled as she looked at it. So Sammy was still living at the same address ... what a dump that was, she thought ...
That same afternoon at her flat she made the telephone call.
“Is that Mr. Peterson?” she enquired and a sweet little voice, said ‘yes’
I mean is that Mr. Robert Peterson?” she asked again and the same sweet little voice answered, ‘No. You want my dad.”
“Oh is that Cameron I am speaking to?” Freya asked politely and the little voice came back with a positive answer, asking how she knew his name.
“Well, I am a good friend of your daddy. Is he at home please?”
“No. He’s gone to do some shopping, but I couldn’t go with him as I have a bad cold.”
“Oh! I’m sorry to hear that. I thought you might have had a cold from your voice Cameron. You sound a little hoarse.”
“Yes, daddy’s gone to get me some cough syrup or something. He says that should make me feel better.”
“That’s good Cameron. Isn’t your daddy really kind to do that for you?”
There was a long pause on the phone and Freya became anxious.
“Cameron, are you still there?”
“Yes, I’m here but I had to get a handkerchief to blow my nose. Sorry.”
“Oh! That’s alright. I do hope your cold gets better when you have the stuff that daddy’s bringing home.”
“Yes, thank you. Daddy always knows what to do when you’re not feeling very well. He is very kind.”
“I can tell from what you say that you love daddy very much, yes?”
“Oh! yes, he’s wonderful and he loves me very much too.”
“That’s a
good boy Cameron. Now perhaps I’ll ring again when daddy gets home, eh?”
“Yes. Can I tell him who called?”
Freya hesitated before she spoke again.
“Well, I want to give him a surprise Cameron, so maybe I’ll just phone him again later on today. I hope your cold gets better soon.”
“Yes thank you. I hope you are well yourself.”
Freya held the phone in her hand as she listened to the dialing tone again and she had a proud smile on her face. “If they say ‘Like father, like son,’ I would have no worries there, if only daddy would listen to me,” she said into the phone before she put it back into its cradle and later that day, she phoned again.
“Is that . . . ?”
“Yes, it is and Cameron told me you had telephoned. He said it was a nice lady with a lovely voice and so I guessed it must have been you.”
“Cameron is a real gentleman ... or gentle boy, if I should call him that, but he sounds so intelligent and you tell me he is only a little boy?”
“Eight and a half now ... and he’s growing fast. Takes a size seven in shoes, he does.”
Freya laughed into the phone. She was delighted to hear Robert’s voice again, but she wasn’t sure how he felt about her and she was reluctant to ask.
‘Play it by ear,’ she told herself, but she still wanted to know.
“How have you been keeping?” she asked sounding very formal indeed and wishing she could have said more and in a very different vein.
“I’m always fine when Cameron is with me, but there is no other change in the circumstances. Are you well?”
“As well as can be expected. I bumped into my ex this morning. I didn’t think he would want to enquire about me. . . or even look me up again.” There was long drawn out silence on the phone when Freya said that. “Are you still there?” she asked and Robert came back with an apology.
“Sorry, Cameron just sneezed and I thought he looked strange for a moment. He’s alright now. What was that you said?”
“Oh! Nothing of importance.”
“You said something about your ex. Is that right?”
“Yes, he was in the cafe this morning when I was on duty. Nothing of importance to tell you. He was concerned about me for some strange reason or another and I don’t know why.”
“Perhaps he still loves you.”
“That’s a big ‘perhaps,’ I can assure you. Sammy never loved me. He loved what he thought I was but he soon tired of being the faithful husband.”
“You could have retaliated,” said Robert with a cheeky smile on his face, as he chuckled into the phone “You could have taken a lover. Lots of people who are married do that. It’s quite common nowadays.”
Freya looked down before she spoke again.
“For better, for worse; for richer or poorer; in sickness and in health,” she said, “I think that covers it all, don’t you?” she enquired and Robert looked at his telephone very solemnly.
“Some man’s gonna get a wonderful wife in you, Freya,” he said and Freya hoped he might add more, but he didn’t.
“I believe in the sacrament of marriage,” she added, “I don’t think you should bother getting married if you don’t think it is something sacred. You might as well just live together,” she said as she added Robert’s own interpretation and said, “It’s quite common nowadays ...”
“You WERE brought up very strictly, I will agree with you there. Not many people think as you do today Freya. People have sex after having known each other for an hour or so. It’s called ‘friendship’ ... Did you know that?”
“And the number of divorces are increasing, I believe with this so called ‘friendship’,” she said and they both laughed together.
“I don’t really care what people do,” she went on. It’s none of my business and I would never moralize, but I feel sorry for the children who are born of such a fickle relationship.”
Robert shrugged his shoulders and bent his head to one side, as he changed the telephone from one hand to the other.
“What a pity your husband ... or rather your ex-husband didn’t share your thoughts on marriage. You would have made a perfect couple and would probably have had about twelve children, yes?”
It was Freya’s turn to smile when Robert said that.
“I don’t know about twelve,” she said, “But I do love children and no matter how many we would have had, I would have been happy, but my ex. wasn’t even into ‘friendship’. He wanted sex and only that and any woman would have satisfied him.
He could never stay with one woman, but he seems to be happier that way and if the women who go with him want the same, then good luck to them, I say, but they shouldn’t ever wreck a marriage.”
Robert was listening with his mouth wide open. He had never heard such philosophy before and particularly not from a woman ... or was it theology he was hearing. He shook his head and raised his eyebrows.
“Well, professor and what will your next lecture be,” he asked and Freya apologized for seeming to be so precise and correct in her thoughts.
“I don’t suppose I ever should have got married.” she said, but Robert shook his head.
“Yours is the ideal and perfect world, Freya,” he said, “but there are very, very few Freyas around these days.”
Freya looked sorrowful and hoped she hadn’t put Robert off marriage. She regarded him as the ‘perfect’ type for marriage and the last thing she wanted was for him to imagine that he was a failure in that regard ... not after two trial runs anyway.”
“I am sorry to have gone on,” she said, “I should have been a nun perhaps, eh?”she added and Robert bowed.
“Yes, Sister, or should I say, Reverend Mother?”
They laughed together again, but as Robert left Freya on the telephone that day, she was even more convinced that she might as well have become a nun for all the notice Robert Peterson was going to pay to her and any ideas of a relationship or ‘friendship’ went out the window.
She went back to her flat with her tail between her legs and promised herself she would never ever lecture anyone on the subject of sex or relationships ever again, but the conversation she had with Robert told her much of what she wanted to know and in particular what his relationship was with both his wives.
Chapter Eight
Two weeks after their last meeting, Freya had a telephone call from Robert and she was relieved to know that she was at home in the flat and not at the cafe, where she possibly could have missed the call. As he spoke into the phone she was delighted, thinking she had made a conquest at last, be it ever so late in coming, but his tone was distant and worried.
“Freya ... I have bad news,” he said and Freya strained to hear what he had to say next. “It’s about Cameron. He is in hospital with pneumonia. Rita and I have been there at the hospital with him all morning.”
“Rita? ... oh! yes of course, I had forgotten the name. How is the little boy? Is there anything I can do?” she asked knowing the inadequacy of her suggestion when his mother was with the little boy.
“No. Thanks all the same. I just wanted to talk to someone about Cameron’s condition and Rita is in shock. I can’t talk to her. She blames me for Cameron’s illness and it’s no use me trying to explain. Rita just won’t listen. I hope I’m not disturbing you.”
“No, no of course not, but I can’t really interfere with Rita there at Cameron’s bedside, can I? I mean if there is anything I can do without appearing on the scene, please let me know. I do so hope everything will be alright with Cameron. Is your second wife involved at all?”
There was a long silence when Freya asked Robert that question.
“No, never her. Sarah hates the sight of Cameron. She never wanted children and always maintained that I spent more time with Cameron than I did with her
. She was very clever when she tried to poison me against my son, saying that Cameron only wanted to see me when he wanted something ... money or that sort of thing. I almost believed her at one point as I was in love with her and as they say, love is blind, but that’s something I have bitterly regretted since we obtained our divorce. Rita was no mother to Cameron either. She was far too busy with her artistic work to be bothered with him, but now that he is ill, it is all my fault that he is in hospital. I don’t know where I’m at, at the moment”
Freya hugged the telephone close to her lips.
“Try to be calm, Robert and let me know as soon as you can, if I can do anything to help. Anything at all.”
“That’s very kind Freya, but I think Rita feels she has everything under control, although she is a bag of nerves and I know it’s no use arguing with her. You see, Cameron is my life and nothing else matters to me and as I have already told you, when I came round from the operation in the hospital, I wanted to die. It was the thought of Cameron being left alone that made me wish otherwise.”
It was when Robert said that and Freya thought on the serious condition of his mind, that she began to think there was no way she could ever figure in Robert’s life. She might have been able to fight against another woman, but what chance did she have against a child.
“I’ll do anything I can, you know that,” she said in conclusion and put the telephone down, but what she couldn’t understand was why Rita should suddenly be so interested in her son when she didn’t show much regard for the little boy before. Perhaps it took illness to make people really consider their values and then what about Sarah? How would she feel when she heard, if she hadn’t done already, that Cameron was so ill? She remembered that Robert had told her how Sarah hated children, but he only discovered that after he had married her. Apparently they had discussed having a child soon after they got married, but the marriage only lasted eighteen months and although Robert was in love with Sarah at that time, it seemed things were different for her when she told people at the school where she was teaching music, that Robert had been cruel to her and had even beaten and raped her on occasions.