Armoires and Arsenic: A Darling Valley Cozy Mystery with Women Sleuths Olivia M. Granville and Tuesday (A Darling Valley Mystery)
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Olivia did an I don’t get it eye rolling head shake. “Who even knows how to do that? Anyway, Richards told him that they could trace the DNA from the fish to the DNA in Blackman’s tissues. Richards pulled that one out of a hat, but it worked. Caldwell bought it and caved and gave up Greta in the process. They’d been getting it on since Blackman cheated everyone out of the biotech deal. He was really just into Greta so he could figure out a way to get back at Blackman. She killed her husband for the diamonds. She wouldn’t share them with him but was willing to give half to Caldwell because, get this: She believe he loved her.”
Now Tuesday did the eyerolling thing. “When will they learn?”
Olivia explained that Caldwell moved to DV and set up a practice for the rich and richer to be closer to Blackman, keep an eye on him. Then the others showed up. The shirtmakers and Harmon. They weren’t just after Blackman. The doctor’s hands weren’t any too clean in the deal either and those three were after both Blackman and Caldwell.
Olivia stretched out on the floor and threw her feet behind her head, then moved into a shoulder stand. She huffed and puffed as she spoke. “So he did his first experimenting with puffer fish, he really is an expert, on Harmon. ME said heart attack and he knew finally had a magic formula. He then slipped it to the shirt couple, apparently it’s not hard to smear it on something and it seeps into the skin. He really isn’t sure how they got into the lake. They should have just collapsed on the ground.” Which is what she did, rolling herself down and touching her heels to the rug again.
“Then when Greta told him she’d heard through the grapevine about the drugs and confronted her husband, I don’t know what grapevine she hangs on, but he admitted it, Caldwell had his solution for Blackman. But hell hath no fury. If Greta had left well enough alone, they would have gotten away with it. Blackman told her about the drugs, the safe deposit box, the works. She probably was on him for losing so much money in the Silicon Valley deal. So she decided to have the diamonds to herself and then Caldwell swept her off her feet with his bedside manner and they thought they had it made. But Roger got high and was complicit in unknowingly help her send the body to an amateur sleuth.”
Olivia sat up and shrugged innocently. “That’s where I come in. Who knew?”
Tuesday sat on a case to zip it shut.
“How much do you have to pay for all that luggage?”
“What’s money for? So everybody’s happy, now, right? Richards has the killers, Cody has Jessica. How did he figure out Mrs. Harmon was BFFs with the wrong Blackman sister?”
“He asked her. Funny how communication works. The daughter I heard about was adopted. Once Jessica was born, she took center stage. Apparently, Brenda, the adopted one, wanted their father to make a business loan to her husband and he refused. The husband took a powder and she blamed it all on her father. She found a willing listener in Mrs. Harmon. They knew each other fro when they all lived in Silicon Valley. So that’s it. Last thing. Richards and Mrs. Harmon are tight because she and her husband lived in Mumbai for a while and she befriended Tasmania. Mrs. Harmon is like everybody’s favorite mother. Could have fooled me.”
The two friends said goodnight and hugged goodbye, promised there would be no tears, hugged some more and raced each other for the box of tissues.
“Tuesday, I’d beg you to move up here with me but I know you would hate it.”
“And I’d beg you to come back to LA but I’ve looked deeply into Detective Richards’ eyes. It would be cruel and unusual punishment to tear you away from those brown beauties.”
Olivia pooh-poohed that idea. “Seriously, he’s not my type and I have a business to get off the ground and a car museum commission to snag.”
“Did you finally hear from George Clooney, er Mr. Bacon?”
“Yeah, he came to the sale. Figured it was the only way he could talk to me. I looked for you to introduce you but you must have been in the house. We have an appointment next week.”
“Now there’s an interesting proposition,” Tuesday said seductively.
“No, it’s not like that. He’s a widower still grieving for his wife.”
“And I know just the chickadee to cheer him up.”
“Honestly, Tuesday, if that came out of anybody else’s mouth I’d never speak to them again. Have you no respect? And you know how he got his money? He won the country’s two biggest Powerball lotteries, three years apart. Three hundred million and change in the first one and four hundred million and change in the second one. Before that he was a dispatcher on the Hoboken public transit. His wife died just before he won the first one. He can’t get over her.”
Tuesday shook her head. “What I have is a deep and abiding wish for my best friend’s happiness. Now give me one more hug and let me get some sleep. Promise me we’ll get together again before Christmas.”
Olivia crossed her heart. “Promise.”
Tuesday said, “Preferably so I can catch your bouquet.”
Olivia threw a pillow at her and then blew kisses all the way out of the room. “Travel well, Tuesday.”
“Stay out of trouble, princess.”
“Which one of us will fulfill those wishes?”
“You better.”
“No, you better.”
“Love you.”
“Love you more.”
“I give up. Let me sleep.”
The End
About the Author
Cassie Page is a prolific writer of tasteful and humorous mysteries set in Northern California and other exotic locations. She resides in a small town near Darling Valley where she raises rare orchids and perfectly behaved children. Her soufflés rise effortlessly, her skirts are always the correct length and she only tweets with the best people. She fraternizes with gruesome murderers and backstabbing lowlifes and reads quantum mechanics for relaxation. Her editor says she has a breathtaking mastery of the semicolon—the colon not so much. If you pass her on the street, she begs that you do not ask for an autograph. Please respect her privacy; the paparazzi have worn her to a frazzle.
Cassie Page Books
The upcoming books in the Darling Valley Mystery series features designer/clothes horse/sleuth extraordinaire Olivia M. Granville; the winsome if bizarrely dressed Tuesday, the tiresomely righteous Mrs. Harmon and the deliciously distant Detective Richards.
Future titles include:
Groundbreaking Bodies
Death is in the Details
A Second Coat of Murder
Tea For Two Murders
Designed for Death
Look for tea leaves reader Tuesday in her own breakout series: Tuesday’s Child is Full of Mischief
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While Ms. Page has worked tirelessly to execute the perfect murder mystery, mistakes happen. Should you find one or wish to communicate on a higher plane, she would be thrilled to hear from you. You can reach her at cassiepagebooks@gmail.com
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Fiction Disclaimer
This book is a work of fiction and solely the product of the author’s warped imagination and twisted sense of humor. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead would be a huge surprise to the author and wholly unintentional. If you feel you resemble any of the characters, honestly, I’d keep it to yourself. You know how rumors start.
Table of Contents
Table of Contents
Chapter One: The Big Move
Chapter Two:
Special Delivery
Chapter Three: Just The Facts, Ma’am
Chapter Four: The Crime Scene
Chapter Five: Tuesday’s Child
Chapter Six: George Clooney Arrives
Chapter Seven: The Doctor Is In
Chapter Eight: Gimme Jimmy Choos
Chapter Nine: Paymoors
Chapter Ten: A Vision of Tuesday
Chapter Eleven: Speak of the Devil
Chapter Twelve: The Darling Valley Bills
Chapter Thirteen: Downtown DV
Chapter Fourteen: The Widow and The Doctor
Chapter Fifteen: She Did It
Chapter Sixteen: Reading Tea Leaves
Chapter Seventeen: The Auction
Chapter Eighteen: Dinner at Hugos
Chapter Nineteen: Sons of Anarchy
Chapter Twenty: Banking Day
Chapter Twenty-One: A Change of Heart
Chapter Twenty-Two: Another Theft
Chapter Twenty-Three: Tummy Trouble
Chapter Twenty-Four: The Memorial
Chapter Twenty-Five: The Leaves Don’t Lie
Chapter Twenty-Six: Free At Last
Chapter Twenty -Seven: Hands Behind Your Back
Chapter Twenty-Eight: The Heist
Chapter Twenty-Nine: Going Fishing
Chapter Thirty: The Catch
Chapter Thirty-One: Sold
Chapter Thirty-Two: BFF’s
About The Author
Contact The Author
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