His, Unexpectedly

by Susan Fox

  I turned to my oldest sister. “And you, Theresa. After Jeffrey you were so cynical.” For the first time, I realized how much we had in common. “You loved him, and he betrayed you.” His betrayal had cost her something important, too—it had set her career back, and career had been all-important to her. “How could you open yourself up to trusting and loving again? I thought you’d figured you didn’t need a man?”

  “I don’t,” she said immediately. “With Damien, it’s not about need, it’s about love. And he’s trustworthy, he isn’t like Jeffrey. He respects me.”

  “Respect is good,” I said softly. Mark respected me; he told me I was a good person.

  “Says the woman who’s all about disrespect,” Kat joked.

  What did she mean? “Am I?”

  “Sure. You disrespect authority, rules, convention, tradition.”

  “You got that right. I hate being stifled. Life’s supposed to be fun.”

  “Everyone hates being stifled,” Tree said. “But I disagree about the rest. Life’s supposed to have meaning. Pleasure, yes, and love if you’re lucky. But meaning, too. That’s the thing you’ve never understood.”

  I should have known all this sisterly warmth was too good to last. Of course the criticisms had to start.

  I was about to snap back at Tree when Kat spoke firmly. “Theresa, not tonight. It’s the first time we’ve been together in ages.”

  “You’re all strong-willed,” Merilee said. “Of course you butt heads.”

  “Don’t put it all on us,” I said. “You squabble just as much as the rest of us.”

  “If I didn’t, I’d be left out completely,” she said bitterly. “You’re the three-pack and I’m the mistake.”

  “You’re the nicest of all of us, M,” Kat said.

  “That’s for sure,” I said. “And you’re not a mistake. Just because you weren’t planned, that doesn’t mean you’re a mistake. I’m the mistake. They wanted a boy and got me.”

  “Same with me,” Kat said. “One girl, one boy. Oh, oops, another girl. I messed up their perfect plan.”

  “No, that was me,” Tree said. “When Mom got pregnant, I screwed up their whole life plan.”

  A laugh spluttered out of me. “Oh Jeez, girls, listen to us. I mean, I know we’re competitive, but honestly. We’re playing ‘who’s the biggest mistake’? How pathetic is that?”

  Kat let out a snort and began to laugh, and Tree and M joined in.

  When we finally calmed down, the air seemed cleansed and free of tension. Kat poured more wine and I took M’s hand, where it rested on her blanket-draped lap, and laced my fingers through hers. “The big day’s just around the corner. My baby sister’s getting married. I’ve heard all the details, but how are you doing? Are you crazy excited?”

  She squeezed my hand. “Sometimes, like when we were picking out dresses on Friday. But sometimes … I don’t know. Being sick, then the surgery, recuperating, so much schoolwork to make up …” The wistful tone in her voice wasn’t at all like Merilee.

  “When you’re on that honeymoon cruise, you’ll get plenty of R&R. Ocean air, delicious food, great sex. You’ll get your energy back.”

  “I’m sure.” Her face was pale in the dim light, with shadowed hollows around her eyes. “This just isn’t how I imagined it.”

  “You built up such huge dreams,” Kat said softly, affectionately, “it’s hard for reality to live up to them. Especially when we’re pulling this together on such short notice.”

  “Merilee.” Tree leaned forward, elbows on the table, to peer at her. “You know you don’t have to do this. You can always go back to the original plan and get married next year. Then you’d have time to get healthy, and months and months to do everything exactly the way you want. I know we’re really inexperienced makeshift wedding planners and—”

  “No, no,” M said quickly, shaking her head so vigorously that the loose scrunchie holding her ponytail slid free and her blonde curls tumbled around her face. “You’re wonderful. Everything you’re planning is wonderful.” She turned to me. “Having the wedding at VanDusen is exactly right, Jenna.” Next she gazed across at Kat. “Having Nav take the photos is so much better than having some impersonal stranger. And those cute e-vites you made are perfect, Kat.”

  She switched her gaze to Tree. “The flowers, the cake, having the reception here in the garden, that incredible dress that fit like it was designed for me, it’s all wonderful.” She swallowed. “And besides, so much work has gone into it, and the cruise is booked, it’s not like we could call it off now.”

  “M?” I said, seriously beginning to worry something was wrong.

  “Of course you could,” Tree said, leaning forward to better see M’s face. “Merilee, if you have any doubts, if you don’t feel well enough or you’d rather wait until next year, of course you can call it off.”

  “No!” M shook her head, curls tossing. “No, I don’t have any doubts. I love Matt. We belong together.” She grabbed her wine glass and took a long swallow, draining it. “Give me a break, every bride’s entitled to a few jitters. Now, let’s talk about something else.” She turned to me. “Jenna, tell us more about this latest guy of yours.”

  Jitters. Yeah, that had to be it. No girl had ever been more confidently in love than Merilee with Matt.

  After a moment’s silence, Kat said, “Yeah, Jenna, let’s hear about him.”

  “What does he do?” Tree asked.

  That was one of the first questions she, as well as Mom and Dad, always asked.

  I knew she—they all—expected me to say something like, “he’s a surfer” or “he plays in a band” or “he’s a rodeo rider.” I delighted in saying, “Dr. Mark Chambers is a marine biologist.”

  “A scientist?” Tree said disbelievingly, as Kat said, “You have to be kidding.”

  Yeah, there they went. Like no scientist could possibly be interested in their dumb sister. “He’s in Vancouver to attend a symposium on global changes in marine social-ecological systems. He’s presenting a paper on rehabilitation of the marine environment after the tsunami in Thailand.” After rattling off all those long words, I took a welcome breath.

  “Do you even know what all that means?” Tree asked, reaching for the wine bottle.

  I stuck out my tongue. I did, more or less. “Mark loves the ocean, and he’ll spend his life trying to save it. It, and the creatures that live in and around it. He’s very committed.”

  As Tree topped up our glasses, Kat said, “Very cool. But more to the point, what’s he like? Cute, sexy, nice?”

  “More handsome than cute. Lean muscles, angular features, sky blue eyes. Definitely sexy. And nice. Doesn’t have much sense of humor but he’s totally honest.” I grinned. “Sometimes things he says in dead seriousness come out really funny.”

  In the dim light, I saw my sisters exchange glances.

  “What?” I demanded.

  “You sound, uh, affectionate,” Kat said.

  Oops. Playing dumb, I said, “Huh? Because I said he’s unintentionally funny?”

  “Tell us more,” M said.

  I shouldn’t, or they’d pick up on how I felt. But the compulsion to talk about Mark was irresistible. “He likes schedules and plans, but he’s not obsessive. He’s brave.” I shivered, remembering the accident, and snuggled into my blanket. “He actually saved a man’s life.”

  “He did? And he told you about it?” Kat sounded skeptical. “Sounds like the egotistical kind of guy I used to date.”

  “No, he’s definitely not. And he didn’t tell me, I was there.”

  “You were there?” Her voice rose.

  “What do you mean?” Merilee demanded, and Tree said, “Jenna, what happened?”

  I told them about the car accident, and Mark saving Mr. Watkins.

  “Wow,” Merilee said solemnly when I finished.

  “Yeah. I was scared shitless.”

  “He sounds like quite the guy,” Kat said.

  I nodd
ed. He was definitely quite a guy, and he really, really liked me. My sisters were no doubt thinking he was too good for me, but he’d asked me to go to Indonesia. Not just as a lover, but because he thought I could be useful.

  Tentatively, I said, “He’s going to Indonesia for his next project. His team will work with local people to repair and rebuild coral reefs and get new methods in place to protect them, plus get some sustainable economies going.”

  “Working with the native people, not imposing Western ideas on them?” Tree asked. My sociologist sister hated it when Westerners disrespected aboriginal people.

  “That’s right,” I assured her.

  “Sounds worthwhile,” she said.

  I took a breath. Should I or shouldn’t I? I let the breath out slowly then said, in a rush, “He asked me to come work on the project.”

  “He did?” Tree said. “What on earth for? You don’t know anything about marine biology.”

  Kat nudged her arm. “He wants her to keep him warm on those long, cold winter nights. No, wait,” she grinned, “it’s the tropics, and summer. But you get my drift.”

  “Jenna,” M said, “how could you afford the flight? You couldn’t even fly home from California.”

  “The flight would be paid for.” I’d told Mark that there was no point trying to win my family’s respect. But now I found I didn’t want to play the same old role of the wild child. I put my wine glass down and stiffened my spine. “No, Kat, I wouldn’t be a sex toy, I’d be working. Hard, knowing Mark. And no, Tree, I don’t have any specific training but I’m interested, I learn quickly, and I’m good with people.”

  There was a long silence, then my oldest sister said slowly, “Okay, those things are all true.”

  Wow. That was almost a real compliment. Before I got too excited, I waited. And sure enough …

  “But,” she went on, “how long is this project?”

  “Six months.”

  “Right.” She exchanged glances with Kat.

  Kat said, “Jenna, have you ever stuck with one thing for six months? You get bored, or some other fun opportunity comes along, or you meet some guy who wants you to go somewhere with him.”

  “Besides,” Tree said, “being involved with your boss is a bad idea in so many ways. Something I learned from sad experience.”

  “He’s not a schmuck like Jeffrey,” I said. “And we’ve talked about this. He’s more of a team leader than a boss, and he says people on his projects do get involved with each other and it’s okay so long as it doesn’t get in the way of the work.” I added more wine to my glass, and everyone else’s as well. We’d almost finished the new bottle.

  Merilee said, “Mark sounds great, and the idea of Indonesia is so much fun. But think it through. Putting work first? For six months?”

  “Why would you stick with this one,” Tree said bluntly, “when you’ve never stuck with any other job?”

  “Because …” In the past, I’d have tossed out some flip comment and blown off the conversation. Or I could speak partial truth and say the environment was important to me.

  Tonight, maybe because of the emotions of the past days, the hugs and sense of bonding earlier, or simply too much wine, I wanted to be honest. What was the worst that would happen? They’d tell me I was crazy. Like I hadn’t heard that before.

  “Because of Mark,” I said quietly, steadily. “I feel differently about him than any other man I’ve met.”

  They all started to talk at once and I spoke over them. “Wait, let me finish. He feels it too. There’s something special between us. Other guys have liked me because I’m pretty and fun to be with, but Mark takes me seriously. He accepts who I am, likes who I am, and thinks I’m …” I smiled, remembering what he’d said, and slipped my hand under the blanket to touch my tattoos. “He said I’m a butterfly, and when I alight I do good, useful things. I make the world a better place.”

  The three of them were silent for a moment and I waited, heart racing with the hope that, for once, they wouldn’t put me down. That they’d see me the way Mark did.

  Merilee spoke first. “I like this guy.”

  I reached over to give her a clumsy blanket-wrapped hug. “So do I, M.”

  “He’s right,” Kat said slowly. “I don’t know all the things you’ve worked on, but that horses thing was therapy for kids, right? And the counting falcons … they’re an endangered species?”

  “And you worked with autistic children,” Merilee said. “I remember when I was in junior high, you talked about that and it helped me decide I wanted to be a teacher.”

  “Seriously?” I’d actually had a positive influence on my little sister? That made me feel incredibly good.

  “Those are worthwhile things,” Tree said.

  Warmth coursed through me, but I knew this was too good to be true.

  “But don’t you think—” she started.

  Kat, her gaze on my face, cut her off. “No, Theresa. Leave it there.”

  Across the table from them, I could barely see their faces but I knew some silent message was being exchanged.

  After a moment, Tree said, “Yes, Jenna, they’re worthwhile things. Good for you.”

  I swallowed. “Thank you. All of you.” I’d trusted them with the truth and they’d come through for me. I let the warm glow touch my heart, and hugged the feelings to me.

  Kat smiled at me. “Jenna, it’s great that you’ve found a man who values you for who you are.” Then she shoved her chair back and rose. “And on that note, I think it’s time for bed, or my own man’s going to think I’ve deserted him.”

  We all stood, blanket-draped, and began to clear the table.

  “You should invite Mark for dinner tomorrow,” Tree said.

  Tonight had been surprisingly good, but I wasn’t ready to subject Mark—and our tentative new relationship—to the family dinner test. “He’s tied up at the symposium.” And after that, he and I needed privacy to talk.

  We trailed inside and tidied up quickly, then headed upstairs. In the hallway of the second floor, we had a group hug.

  “Don’t tell Dad about Indonesia, okay?” I said. “Mark and I are still talking about it. I don’t want to say anything more until we decide.”

  They all agreed, then we wished each other good night and headed off to our rooms.

  I went into my old bedroom and glanced around at the things that had been there so long I rarely ever noticed them: the crystal hummingbird mobile in the window, a couple of not awful oil paintings of flowers that I’d done, and posters of tropical beaches with families playing.

  As a teen, I’d dreamed of going to California, and beyond to places like Indonesia. I’d dreamed of meeting a wonderful man, falling in love, and having babies.

  After Travis, I’d stopped dreaming. I’d lived day to day, trusting the universe rather than any man.

  The universe had brought me Mark. And Mark had, tantalizingly, painted images of all those old dreams brought to life. If he’d left it at inviting me on a six-month project, that would have been scary enough, but then he’d talked about the future. Long-term.

  I didn’t do long-term. Was I capable of doing long-term? Did I want to?

  Did I dare believe him, trust him, give in to the amazing feelings that so confused me? Did I dare let myself dream again?

  Before, when I’d loved, it had made me stupid. I’d let myself get hurt; I’d let my dreams be destroyed. How could I take that risk again?

  Sighing, unsettled, I slipped into bed and turned out the light. Was there any hope I’d sleep?

  A thought occurred to me, and I leaped out of bed again to plug in my cell phone so I wouldn’t miss Mark’s call.

  Chapter 13

  Monday morning, before leaving for the symposium, Mark called Jenna from the privacy of his room. Nerves quickened his breath as he listened to her cell ring.

  Had she told her family about Indonesia? How would they have reacted? If they’d tried to talk her out of it, they migh
t well have pushed her into deciding to go out of sheer perverseness. But he wanted her to made her decision for the right reasons.

  Yesterday, he’d figured it was good for both of them to spend time apart, to step back and think carefully. For him, that time had only made him miss her, and feel more determined that she should come to Indonesia. What effect had it had on Jenna?

  Finally, her voice sounded in his ear, breathless. “Mark?”

  “Good morning, Jenna. Did I wake you?”

  “No, I was in the shower when the phone rang.”

  He imagined her naked in a steam-filled bathroom and had the predictable reaction. “Now that’s just mean.”

  She laughed softly. “I’m only telling the truth, the way you always do.”

  He smiled, liking how well she knew him and relieved that her affectionate, teasing tone suggested she wasn’t pulling back. “I miss you. Does tonight still work?”

  “I miss you too. I’ll make it work. What time?”

  “Nine? Can you suggest a coffee shop or bar?”

  “Nope. It has to be the beach. How about Spanish Banks?”

  “That would be great.” She wouldn’t break up with him on a beach, he was almost sure of that. “Want me to pick you up?”

  “No, I’ll meet you there.”

  Did that mean she hadn’t told her family about him? Or that she had and still didn’t want to introduce him?

  Was he being too analytical? It was so much easier to analyze nature than human beings.

  They agreed on which parking lot to meet in, and she said, “Can’t wait to see you.”

  “Me either.” He’d have chatted more, asked her about her reunion with her family, but the symposium would be starting soon. “I have to go.”

  “Good luck with your paper, not that you’ll need it.”

  Things were going to be okay. He could feel it.

  Whistling, he hurried downstairs to say a quick goodbye to his grandparents, then climbed into the Westfalia.

  Last night and over an early breakfast, he’d been struck by how huge the difference was between his grandparents and Jenna. Here they were, well into their eighties, and all they did was work. Admittedly, they were devoted to their careers and doing valuable work, but he wondered if they’d tasted the free trade coffee he’d brewed or if they’d ever even walked on a beach, much less made love on one. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d heard either of them laugh.