Harlequin Romantic Suspense March 2016 Box Set
Page 21
Anxiety built inside her as the evening hours waned and she still heard no word from him. It was eight thirty when she gave Cooper his bath and then tucked him into bed.
Once Cooper had fallen asleep, Trisha went back down the stairs. Dark thoughts began to play in her head. Had her kidnapping made Dusty’s feelings about her change? Had he decided that he didn’t want a future with her after all?
Surely she was jumping to crazy conclusions. There had to be another explanation for his absence. But what? He’d sported the shadows of a black eye when they’d parted in the early morning hours. Had he suffered other injuries that he hadn’t mentioned to anyone?
A new apprehension worried through her as she wondered about his well-being. She was pacing the great room when Cassie entered and sat on the sofa.
“Go talk to him,” Cassie said. “I just spoke to Adam and he told me that Dusty is in his room.”
“For some reason he doesn’t seem to want to talk to me,” Trisha replied. “I’ve called him several times and he isn’t answering.”
“Don’t you want to know what’s going on with him? I mean, it’s obvious that something is off, right?” Cassie held her gaze. “Maybe he just needs some kind of reassurance from you.”
“Reassurance about what? Nothing has changed as far as my feelings for him.”
“Maybe he figures now that the danger to you has passed, you don’t need him anymore.” Cassie shrugged and smiled ruefully. “Who knows how men think?”
Trisha rolled Cassie’s words around in her head. Was that it? Did he really believe that she’d only loved him because she’d needed him to protect her?
Was he so insecure in her love for him that he really believed she didn’t want him now, that she no longer believed in the dreams they’d shared for their future together?
“Go on, Trisha. There’s a flashlight under the kitchen sink. Use it and go down to the bunkhouse and talk to him,” Cassie said.
“Cooper...”
“Will be just fine here with me,” Cassie assured her.
Trisha flashed a grateful smile and then hurried into the kitchen. With the high-powered flashlight in hand, she went out the back door and headed for the bunkhouse in the distance.
She had no idea what might be going through Dusty’s mind, but if he really believed that she didn’t need him anymore then she was going to set him straight.
They’d just been to hell and back together. He was the man she wanted beside her for the rest of her life, the man she wanted to raise her son as his own. The nightmare was finally over and now was the time for them to celebrate and rejoice.
When she reached the bunkhouse, Tony was seated outside one of the rooms. “Hi, Trisha,” he greeted her. “I’m assuming you’re down here to talk to Dusty.” He pointed to the room next to his. “He’s in there.”
“Thanks, Tony,” she replied. She knocked on the door.
“It’s open.” Dusty’s voice drifted out.
She opened the door. Dusty was stretched out on the bed and sat up, his eyes wide with surprise at the sight of her. His right eye still bore the dark circle and a slight swelling of the blow Greg had delivered to him.
“Trisha, I wasn’t expecting you. I thought you were one of the other guys,” he said.
He raked a hand through his hair and his gaze didn’t quite meet hers. She closed the door and leaned against it. “Why haven’t you come up to the house to see me today?” she asked.
“I’ve been busy.” Still he didn’t look at her.
“Dusty, what’s going on?” Her heart thundered a slow beat of dread.
He finally met her gaze. His eyes were dark and unfathomable. “What’s going on is that I’ve enjoyed our time together, but after giving it all some deeper thought, I think it’s time we said goodbye.”
Her heart stopped. “Goodbye? What are you talking about?” She walked over and sat next to him on the bed.
“You’re safe now. We know the bad guy wasn’t Frank and hopefully you never have to worry about him. You and Cooper can move on with your lives. You need to find a good man, Trisha. Someplace out there is the man you really deserve.”
She stared at him blankly. “Dusty, I don’t want another man. I want you. I deserve you.” She reached out and placed her hand on his forearm. He shocked her by jerking away. “Dusty, please help me to understand.”
“There’s nothing to understand,” he said harshly. “You need to find somebody else to build a future with. I’m just not the man for you.”
She searched his features. “Then you don’t love me anymore? Everything you told me was nothing but lies?” Pain ripped through her. Had this been nothing more than his desire to get her into his bed? Had he just wanted to be the cowboy who finally got her to say yes to dating? No, she’d never believe that.
“Dusty, you look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t love me,” she demanded. Anger momentarily usurped the unbearable ache in her heart.
“I guess I’m not the man you thought I was. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m tired.” He stared at some point just over her head.
She got to her feet, waves of pain crashing through her. “I certainly don’t want to be here if you don’t want me here.” She walked over to the door and opened it. “I don’t know what’s happened, but I’ll never believe that you don’t love me. I love you, Dusty Crawford, and nothing you can do or say is going to change that fact.”
Tears burned hot, and before they could fall she left his room and slammed the door behind her. Thankfully, Tony had disappeared and there was nobody to hear the choking sob that escaped her.
Thoughts of Cooper and Dusty had been the only thing that had kept her strong during the agonizing hours she’d been with Greg. She’d clung to the belief that somehow they would all have a future together. It had given her hope when rationally she should have had none.
And now that hope had been ripped away and she didn’t know why. She stumbled through the dark toward the house, tears blurring her vision.
What had happened between the time she’d been kidnapped and now? What could have possibly changed his mind? It didn’t matter. The fact was that he’d told her he wasn’t the man for her. He wanted her to find somebody else.
By the time she reached the house, she’d swiped away her tears, not wanting Cassie to see her a blubbering mess. But the need to cry still pressed tight in her chest.
“I take it things didn’t go so well,” Cassie said softly.
“He told me to go out and find a good man.” She bit her bottom lip.
“Dusty is a good man,” Cassie replied.
“You know that and I know that, but apparently he thinks I deserve better than him. I don’t understand any of this. How could he just turn off his feelings for me?”
“Are you sure that he has?” Cassie asked.
Trisha raised a hand and rubbed the center of her forehead, where a headache was attempting to take hold. Still, the ache in her head couldn’t begin to compete with the pain in her heart. “I don’t know. I’m going to bed. I can’t think anymore tonight.”
“Good night, Trisha. Hopefully things will be better tomorrow.”
Trisha nodded, but she didn’t believe anything would ever be better again. She climbed the stairs slowly, her brain still working to try to make sense of what had happened.
He’d been so closed off, so utterly shut down. She grabbed her nightshirt in the bedroom and then went into the bathroom to change.
It was over. The promise that had shone from his eyes whenever he’d looked at her would never come true. The danger was gone and apparently so was Dusty’s love.
She stared at her reflection in the mirror and lost the battle to contain her tears. She’d been so happy. She’d been so sure when Dusty had rescued her the night before th
at she was really going to get the happily-ever-after she’d yearned for.
She’d lost so much in her life. She’d truly hoped that the losses were finally behind her. She sluiced the tears away with handfuls of cold water.
Minutes later she got into the bed next to the one where Cooper slept soundly. It was time to leave this ranch. There was nothing to stop her from leaving now. She and Cooper could at least go back to the motel until she could find a more permanent place for them.
Should she just pack up and leave Bitterroot? How difficult was it going to be to remain here, where Dusty would come into the café to eat, where she could run into him around town?
She squeezed her eyes tightly closed, wondering how everything had gone so terribly wrong. She fought against a new wave of tears and opened her eyes and stared up at the darkened ceiling.
A few minutes later she heard Cassie come up the stairs and the sound of her bedroom door closing. Trisha desperately wanted the oblivion of sleep, but she didn’t get the luxury as her brain continued to race.
Maybe there was something wrong with her. In her short life two men had developed a sick obsession with her. Didn’t that speak of something amiss with her?
No, she couldn’t think that way. She’d take some responsibility for encouraging Frank, for staying with him far longer than she should have, but there was no way she’d blame herself for Greg. She wasn’t responsible for his actions or feelings for her. Then, what had changed Dusty’s mind?
He didn’t say he doesn’t love you. He didn’t look you in the eyes and tell you he no longer cares. She drew in a deep breath and released it slowly on a shuddery sigh.
Is this the way you fight for what you want? Do you just give up so easily? Dusty’s voice thundered in her head. He’d teased her about giving up without a fight. Was that what she had just done tonight?
She’d walked out of his room without any real answers. She was as confused now as she’d been when she’d gone down to the bunkhouse to talk to him.
She sat up. This was too important to give up on. They were too important to give up on. He’d teased her about fighting for what she wanted, and darn it, that was just what she intended to do right now.
Without hesitation she got out of bed and went down the hallway and softly knocked on Cassie’s door. Cassie was in bed with her nightstand lamp on and a book in her hand.
“Would you mind listening for Cooper? I’m going back to the bunkhouse.”
Cassie sat up. “You know I don’t mind.”
“I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I need some real answers from him and I’m not going to sleep until I get them.”
“You go, girl,” Cassie replied with a smile of encouragement.
Trisha nodded and then turned and headed down the stairs. She didn’t bother to change out of her nightshirt. She didn’t want to take any time that might make her hesitate or change her mind.
She grabbed the flashlight from under the sink and then went out of the back door. If Dusty thought she was just going to go away quietly, then he was sadly mistaken.
After all they had been through, after everything they had shared, she deserved something more from him than the vagueness she’d gotten earlier.
With each step, a rich anger began to build. He’d blindsided her. He’d rushed to her rescue and throughout the long night of questioning his eyes had shone with love and he’d held her hand in support. There had been no indication from him that his feelings had changed toward her.
If for some reason he’d decided he didn’t love her anymore, if he’d reached the conclusion that he didn’t want a life with her and Cooper, then she couldn’t do anything about it. She’d have to go on and she would, but not before she understood what had happened to change his mind, what had made him act the way he had.
No lights filtered out from any of the windows in the bunkhouse. Her heart beat rapidly as she realized this was a moment that would define her future. She turned off her flashlight and set it on the ground and then knocked softly on Dusty’s door. There was no reply.
“Dusty, it’s me.” She knocked a little harder.
“Trisha, go back to the house. It’s late.” His voice drifted through the door.
“I’m not leaving until we talk,” she said and then knocked even louder. At this point she didn’t care if she woke up every person on the property. She was not going away. She used her fist to bang on the door.
A light blinked on and then the door opened. “Jeez, woman, what are you doing?”
He stood in the doorway clad only in a pair of black boxers. His hair was tousled, but he didn’t appear sleepy. She pushed past him and entered the small room.
She turned back to face him. “You’ve accused me in the past of not really fighting for what I want. Well, I want you, Dusty, and I’m here to fight for you.”
He closed the door, ran a hand through his hair and stared at her with shuttered eyes. “We already talked. There’s nothing more to say.”
“I’m so mad at you right now I could spit,” she replied.
He raised a brow and released a sigh. “Trisha, I’d much rather we part as friends.”
“And tell me again why we are parting.”
He leaned with his back against the door and looked past her as if something on the bare wall had caught his interest. “I already told you. You deserve a better man.”
“I already have the best with you. Why would I want anyone else?” She studied him, wishing she could read the thoughts inside his brain. “Dusty...please, make me understand what you’re doing.”
His gaze locked with hers once again. His eyes were dark and filled with torment. “I didn’t hear you.” The words sounded as if they’d been squeezed out of the very depths of his soul.
She frowned and sank down on the bed. “What are you talking about?”
His muscles tensed. “You were in danger and you called to me and I didn’t hear you, because I’m damaged goods. I’m not strong enough—I’m not good enough for anyone. Even my own parents knew I wasn’t worth a damn.”
“They were the ones who were damaged goods,” Trisha exclaimed. “They were obviously broken and not fit to be parents.”
He closed his eyes for a long moment and when he gazed at her again they radiated a wealth of anguish. “I’m deaf, Trisha. I’m deaf in one ear and if I wasn’t then I would have heard you when you called out to me and Greg never would have been able to kidnap you and take you to that cabin.”
Deaf in one ear? Her mind whirled and she remembered the times when she’d noticed he watched her mouth, when she spoke too softly and he’d asked her to repeat herself.
She got up from the bed and moved to stand mere inches in front of him. “Dusty, I don’t care if you’re deaf in both ears and can’t see out of one eye. You’re brave and strong, but more important than anything is that I’ve seen the pure goodness of your heart, and more than anything I want that heart to be mine forever.”
His eyes misted, but still he didn’t reach for her. He didn’t make any move, except she sensed his tension. She reached out and placed a hand on his lower cheek, where she could feel the faint stubble of whiskers and a tic in his knotted jaw.
“Dusty, it was a dark and stormy night and I had an arm around my throat when I yelled to you. A man with a thousand ears probably wouldn’t have heard me. Let it go. What’s important is that you were there when I needed you most.”
He reached up and covered her hand with his, his gaze locked with hers intently. He seemed to gaze into her very soul and slowly the tension left his body.
“And here we are,” he finally said softly.
She nodded and they dropped their hands to their sides. “Dusty, if you let me go, then your parents win. If you push me out of your life, then Greg wins. If you don’t take me
into your arms right now and tell me that we’re going to have the future together that we both deserve, then I’m going to scream, and trust me, you won’t have any problems hearing me.”
The shimmer in his eyes transformed into something different than impending tears. It became something hot...something utterly wonderful and momentarily took her breath away.
“I love you, Trisha. I want my future to be with you and Cooper. I want to be the man you both want and need in your lives.” His voice was thick with emotion.
“You’re already that man.” Her heart swelled to fill her chest. “Now, for goodness’ sake, kiss me, you crazy cowboy.”
He grabbed her around the waist and pulled her to him. His lips captured hers in a kiss that held all of the promise of the future, all the love she could ever dream of for herself and her son.
Her heart filled with a joy she’d thought she’d never have. Dusty was her forever man, and they were going to live happily ever after with a little cowboy who believed he hung the moon.
EPILOGUE
“Is this going to be Cooper’s room?” Cooper asked as he galloped on a pretend horse around the empty bedroom. He stopped riding in front of Dusty. “Dusty, is this gonna be our forever house?”
Dusty exchanged a glance with Trisha and then crouched down in front of Cooper. “It’s got a great backyard for playing cowboys and a bedroom for you, one for your mommy and me, and another one if someday you get a little brother or sister. I think it looks pretty good, but the final decision is up to your mom.”
He straightened up as Cooper ran to his mother standing in the doorway. “I think this house is good. When can we get a brother? Mommy, your final ’cision should be yes.” He grabbed her hand and danced up and down.
Trisha laughed. “I’ll tell you what, let’s go look at the kitchen again and then we’ll make a final decision.”
“You two go ahead. I’ll be there in just a minute,” Dusty said.
As Trisha and Cooper left the room, Dusty moved to stand in front of the window. It had been a week since Trisha had come to his room and fought for what she wanted. The past seven days had been the happiest of Dusty’s life, and he knew that this was only the beginning.