“Thomas,” Inola warned.
Gabriel shook, holding his heart in his arms tighter, longing sickly in that moment to see the life leave his friend’s eyes.
“Thomas,” Gabriel said carefully. “Shut up.”
“She will hate you. You know that, right?” Thomas said.
“I will gladly take her hatred over her being dead! I have lived with her hatred before. It won’t last forever.”
“Human hatred pales in comparison to vampire hatred. Have you learned nothing from your rivalry with Elias?”
“Thomas!” Inola said.
Thomas ignored her, staring angrily at Gabriel. “You should have left her alone. The minute you started caring for her, you should have wiped her memory and let her go!”
Although he wanted nothing more than to go to Thomas and resort to violence, Gabriel could not make himself let go of Kara. And Thomas’s words were beginning to cut through Gabriel’s anger, seeking their way down into the endless guilt inside his heart.
Inola looked furious, obviously speaking aloud for Gabriel’s sake. “Keep your thoughts to yourself! It is done now, and nothing can change that! How many times have I told you that Kara becoming a vampire was inevitable?”
“He needs to understand!” Thomas snapped. “You thought she had to be watched before? Protecting her as a human was a cakewalk compared to how we will have to watch her as a vampire. She’ll be stronger, faster. She’ll be fast enough to run away from us and strong enough to fight us. She may even try to kill herself!”
Inola froze, and Gabriel stared at the wall beside Thomas.
“She won’t be able to kill me. I am her sire. But . . . she will try to kill me,” Gabriel said quietly, finally allowing Thomas’s words to fully sink in. “She will not be thinking clearly. She will not want my blood. The blood frenzy . . . ,” he choked on the words.
Tears fell from Gabriel’s eyes, and he looked to Inola in agony. “I hurt her when she needed me the most. The blood frenzy overtook me, and I . . . I . . .” Gabriel buried his face in Kara’s hair and sobbed as if she were truly dead.
“I’m the one who killed her. I did this. I did this to her. . . .”
“It was not you,” Inola said. “It was Elias. It was the knife wound.”
“It was me. It was me. It was me. . . .”
It took a long time for Gabriel to possess the ability to think clearly.
Gabriel knew they wouldn’t be able to get her back to the coven house before she woke up, and he didn’t want to deal with Kara’s awakening inside a moving car.
There was no use in even leaving his home; Elias had accomplished exactly what he’d wanted. Even so, ten members of Violet Memory were on their way after Inola called the coven house.
Inola and Thomas found all of the cameras and smashed them to pieces. After that, the two of them busied themselves cleaning up Gabriel’s bedroom.
It was easier for them to coax the cats out of the closet, easier for them to bury the dogs and burn the bloody sheets than to do what Gabriel was doing.
Gabriel tended to Kara inside the guest room where Thomas and Inola had stayed after he cleaned himself up.
And he felt like he was dying the entire time.
He washed Kara’s body, the water turning red as it dripped off of her. Each drop was guilt, stained with anger and regret.
He took out her stiches, but the wound didn’t heal. All of her other injuries healed, but the ones caused by the silver knife wouldn’t heal until the transformation was complete.
Eventually, there was nothing left to do but wait, and when that time came, Inola and Thomas were there with him.
Gabriel lay on the bed with Kara, his head propped up on top of hers, registering the changes in her body.
She had a pulse again. It was slow and sounded strange to him, as he was so used to her tachycardia. She was breathing again, the breaths steady and deep, every intake of air in time with his own. Her skin lost its warmth and became paler. He couldn’t tell if she looked more beautiful or not because she had always been so beautiful to him.
Kara finally stirred in his arms hours later. Thomas and Inola shot up from their seats, going to stand beside the bed.
Gabriel’s body shook. She was alive. She was ok. He knew he wouldn’t feel better until he saw her looking at him. He knew her eyes would be filled with hatred, but she was alive, and that was all that mattered to him.
He looked down at Kara just as her eyelids fluttered. He lifted up the corner of her shirt, eyeing the smooth skin, the silver wounds gone for good.
The first thing she said was his name.
Chapter 8 Betrayed
“Gabriel?”
I knew he was the one holding me; his scent was stronger than usual.
Actually, everything was stronger than usual. My sight, my hearing. My perception of touch.
Was I connected to Gabriel? Strange . . . It didn’t feel overwhelming. My body was processing the enhanced sensations better than it normally did.
“Thomas? Inola?” I said. My eyes searched the guest room and locked onto them.
Thomas grinned warily. “Hey, Red.”
Inola was crying. She reached out and took my hand. “Hello, sweet girl.”
Gabriel tensed against me, as if bracing himself. I turned to him, my movements too fast. Too fluid.
“Gabriel, the connection. Something’s not right. I’m like you too much. It’s never been like this before . . . ,” I said, my voice trailing off as I looked at his face.
He looked the same, and yet, he did not. Had he always been so handsome? His eyes were brighter than usual.
“Something’s not right . . . ,” I repeated uneasily.
The memories came crashing back. Elias. Gabriel. My dogs.
I got up off the bed, and immediately, Thomas went to stand in front of the door, and Inola went to the draped window. Gabriel rose as well.
“Kara, try to stay calm,” Gabriel said carefully.
The emotions—there was no word for how strong they were. I had felt Gabriel’s before, and the difference had been staggering, but unlike my senses, my body wasn’t processing the emotions well at all.
Something was not right. . . .
“My dogs?” I asked, even though I already knew the answer.
Gabriel’s face became racked with pain.
“I buried them, Red, in a really nice place. We can go see them when the sun goes down if you want,” Thomas said gently.
“No,” I gasped. “No, no, no, no . . .”
Tears fell from my eyes as my gaze scanned Gabriel’s body. “But you’re ok,” I said in relief, seeing so clearly in my mind how badly he had been hurt.
Then I remembered him coming toward me, his eyes a bottomless, soulless black.
“You drank my blood,” I said in disbelief. “You drank my blood when I was hurt. . . .”
I backed away from him, registering how loud my footsteps were. I whirled around, my hand going to my throat.
It burned. It was bearable, but it was very unpleasant and annoying.
“Are you thirsty?” I asked desperately.
“Kara, listen to me, please,” Gabriel said, his voice pleading.
And it was too late. I had whirled around again, glancing at the mirror on the wall. My eyes were glowing—a beautiful mixture of blue, green, and gold.
This was no blood connection making me feel this way. I felt this way because I was . . .
“You didn’t.” I looked at Gabriel. “You did not!”
“I had no choice.”
“No choice?” I seethed. “You promised me!”
“You were dying. You would be dead had I not saved you.”
I started to laugh and was unable to stop. The sound was hysterical, and tears fell from my eyes faster.
Inola and Thomas actually looked scared.
Minutes passed before I was able to breathe properly. The air I sucked in to fuel my words were tinged with iron and bleach.
“You, save me? When have you ever saved me, Gabriel?” Immediately, I was angry again. “You drank my blood!”
“It was the blood frenzy. Words cannot express how sorry I am. I know I have wronged you, but—”
“Wronged you,” I mimicked. “That’s how you word it? You lying coward! You betrayed me! You turned me!” I screamed.
“Kara—” Gabriel began.
“Shut up!” I said. “Oh, I hate you. I hate you!”
Gabriel reached for me, his face no longer wary, but determined.
I smacked his hand away, hard enough that I could hear and feel the snap of bone. He didn’t even flinch.
“Don’t you dare touch me!” I warned.
Gabriel flexed his hand, the bones snapping back into place. “What was I supposed to do? Let you die?” His voice was rising, matching mine in anger.
“Yes! Or, how about this?” I said, flinging my arms out. “Maybe you should have left me alone completely! You know, instead of kidnapping me like a homicidal maniac!”
Gabriel had the audacity to smile. “So we are back to square one, are we? I remember you telling me that you no longer resent me for what transpired that night.”
I screamed, the sound almost hurting my new ears. I lunged at him, shoving him into the wall. He fell against the mirror. The glass cracked.
“Kara, stop it!” Inola shouted.
I whirled on her. “And you two! Were you in on this?” I asked, my voice dripping with venom.
Inola appeared shocked. “Of course not! How could you ask that?”
I turned my accusing glare to Thomas. He stayed where he was, leaning against the door almost casually. Only the drumming of his fingers against his side indicated he was upset about the situation. He shook his head at me.
I could smell that Gabriel was close to me again. His scent cascaded over me, filling me with a hatred so potent it made me sick.
“Get. Away. From. Me,” I said, enunciating each word through clenched teeth.
Thomas raised an eyebrow. “Perhaps you should listen to her, friend,” he said dryly.
“Heart,” Gabriel said softly.
His voice cut through the hatred, and just as soon as I hated him, I loved him again.
And it was my love for him—the annoying, blinding, obsessive love I felt for him that had proved to be my ruin time and time again—that made me do what I did next.
I was barely aware of my movements, too unhinged to even understand my new speed and strength as I threw the desk chair against the floor. As it exploded into splintery shards, I caught one of the wooden legs in midair and threw the sharp point straight at Gabriel.
It was over in a matter of seconds, but I saw it all in painful clarity. I had tried to throw it at his heart, but some invisible force inside my body hadn’t allowed me to throw it at that vulnerable spot. Instead, it went for his collarbone.
Gabriel tried to move out of the way, but the sharp wood still embedded itself into his upper left arm.
Inola’s cry grated against my eardrums. Thomas moved away from the door, his calm mask slipping.
Gabriel’s blood glittered like rubies as it flew through the air, but his gaze remained steady on me, almost smug, as if he had expected no less.
Horror washed through me as he tore the wood from his arm. My hand covered my mouth, but a strange sound still escaped.
What had I just done? Had I seriously just tried to kill Gabriel?
The burning in my throat paled in comparison to the pain ripping its way through my heart. I couldn’t compete with the storm of emotions.
I turned and ran.
I felt a cool gush of air behind me, as if someone had made a grab for me, but a few strands of my hair were all they were able to catch. I felt them rip from my skull as I ran from the room faster than I thought possible.
I threw myself against the front door and turned the doorknob.
“NO!” Gabriel shouted.
Gabriel collided into me and tore my hand away from the doorknob. He backed me up against the wall between the door and the window, pinning me there with his body.
“Leave me alone!” I screamed. “Let me go!”
I tried to shove him off of me, but he was still stronger than me.
Just like that, I hated him again. I tried pushing him off of me once more, but to no avail.
And then it finally hit me. His blood.
His wound was closed, but the sweet liquid still stained his arm. It was like a siren call, and it promised release from the pain of not only my thirst, but from the pain of losing my dogs and from the pain of Gabriel’s betrayal.
Release from hurting him and loving him.
Frustrated, I raked my fingers against the draped window. My only longing was to escape from the blood on his arm.
“Kara, stop! The sun—”
His words were too late. My hand yanked the drapes away from the window like they were as fragile as butterfly wings. Sunlight poured through the glass.
Pain. Fire.
My hand and forearm burned, and I screamed as the sunlight blistered my arm.
Gabriel whirled me away, pinned me to the ground, and concealed me with his body.
The sunlight was like poison. Even out of its range, I felt weak and sick. My arm burned like my throat. I whimpered and moaned underneath Gabriel.
“It’s ok, heart. Ssh, it’s healing. Look, it is healing,” Gabriel said.
My eyes found my arm. The angry, burned skin was black in some places. It healed in a matter of seconds.
I began to shake. I wondered if my entire body would have caught fire had Gabriel not moved me away.
The line between love and hatred blurred.
Thomas and Inola were now in the room. They watched us carefully before moving to put the drapes back into place, dodging the sunlight expertly.
“Is she ok?” Inola asked.
I wanted to shout that I wasn’t, but I refrained. Gabriel got off of me, pulling me off the floor to gently cradle me in his lap. I allowed him to hold me, stunned by my rash actions.
“She’s fine,” Gabriel said.
Thomas snorted in response.
I quivered in Gabriel’s arms. “I tried to kill you,” I said in disbelief. My fingers dug into my curls, clutching at my skull.
He ran his hand along my back in soothing patterns. “It wouldn’t have hit my heart. You cannot kill me; I am your sire.”
I understood that, but Gabriel being my sire had not crossed my mind in my anger. Had his blood not changed me, he would be dead.
The blood on his arm beckoned to me. “Let me go,” I said.
“No,” he answered quickly.
I squirmed. “Let me go now!”
“You nearly just roasted yourself alive.”
I turned my face away from him in desperation, and that desperation leaked into my voice. “I don’t want to be around you!”
He sighed, his arms releasing me. “You need blood.”
I stood up. “I will roast alive before I take any part of you inside of me.”
Finally, my words pierced him. Pain lanced across his face before smoothing into the apathetic mask he used to wear.
“I will get you a blood bag,” Gabriel said.
“I can do that myself. Now leave me alone,” I said.
I went into the kitchen and sat down at the table. My entire body quaked with unstable emotion. Tears pooled and fell from my eyes in torrents. Painful memories raced across my mind.
My dogs. My sweet, poor babies I loved so much.
Elias’s cold, bloody hands on my body.
The knife slicing across my abdomen. I shuddered, still feeling the blade against my skin.
Gabriel pinned to the wall, dripping with so much blood he was unrecognizable. His black, demonic eyes fixated on the blood pouring from me.
Inola took my shaking hands and held them, snapping me out of my dark thoughts.
I looked down, confused. I had been digging my nails into
my skin unknowingly, and red half-moons covered my wrists. The small wounds healed quickly.
Tears never stopped falling from my eyes. I looked to her. “Help me,” I begged, my voice an aching whisper.
“Child, I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Please forgive him. None of you deserved this. . . .”
“Make it stop. Make the pain go away. Please make it go away.”
Her breath hitched. “I can’t, child.”
“Kill me.”
Her eyes widened, alive with a memory from another time, a different place, where I had begged the same request.
In the other room, I heard Gabriel stumble and curse.
Thomas shut the refrigerator door loudly and placed a blood bag in front of me. He sat down across from me. “I don’t ever want to hear that come out of your mouth again, Red.”
“This pain—”
“You are in shock and have been through horrendous trauma. You are a new vampire, not even an hour old. It takes years to get used to the stronger emotions. You may feel this way right now, but trust me—you do not truly want to die.”
I actually smiled. The sensation felt cold. It must have been a sight because Inola pulled her hands away, and even Thomas looked uncertain.
“And how would you know?” I asked, my voice filled with deadly calm. “Because you, Thomas, chose this life? Because I might get used to it? Because one day I might want to live happily ever after with my darling sire?”
My tears hit the table, splashing loudly. I stared down at the pools. They were mesmerizing, almost beautiful. My smile went wider, quivering at the edges. “Because since I’m a vampire, I won’t be afraid of the dark?” I said.
Inola slid the blood bag closer to me. “Drink this. It will help you feel better. Although, if you had Gabriel’s, the pain would go away completely for a while.”
My smile faded. “Not a single drop of his blood will ever pass my lips.”
I heard Gabriel inhale sharply from the other room.
“Then drink that blood instead,” Thomas said.
“No.”
They stared at me, disbelief on their faces.
I couldn’t deny I wanted the blood. I could smell it through the bag, its iron tang promising temporary paradise.
Forever Stained Red (Violet Memory Book 2) Page 9