Jeremy (Broken Angel #4)

by L. G. Castillo

  Gently, he settled her down on her feet and waited for her soul to awaken.

  “It’s time to wake up, Mrs. Duran.”

  Brown eyes fluttered open. “Mijita? Lash?”

  “Welita!” Naomi spun around and threw herself into her grandmother’s arms. “Oh, Welita.”

  “Why are you crying?” Welita rubbed her back.

  “You died.”

  Welita looked at the glowing light and then at Lash’s angel wings. “I had a feeling this was the night. I sensed it. I sensed”—her eyes flicked to Jeremy—“you. You were the one watching me?”

  “Yes, Mrs. Duran. That was me.”

  “This is my brother, Jeremy. He’s going to help you cross over,” Lash said.

  “No, he won’t,” Naomi snapped. Taking Welita’s hand, she pulled her across the room far from the light. “Don’t listen to Jeremy, Welita. Just wait here.”

  “Why? I’m ready to go. I’m ready to see your father again, too. It’s been so long.”

  “If you go, I’ll never see you again.”

  “I don’t understand.” Welita’s eyes darted from Jeremy to Lash. “Won’t I be with you now?”

  “Humans go to a different place from where the angels live,” Lash said.

  Welita’s face fell. “Oh, I see.”

  “But you’ll be with Javier,” Lash added quickly.

  “No one’s going anywhere,” Naomi said. “Please, Welita, just do what I say and don’t move. I’m going to fix this.”

  Welita looked over at Lash, hopeful. When he shook his head, she closed her eyes briefly, pain flashing over her face. When she opened them, she gazed up at Naomi, resolute.

  “Please, Welita.” Naomi knew her grandmother well. Welita held on to her faith until the very end.

  Brown hands reached up and cupped Naomi’s sweet face. She stared into her eyes, taking one last long look at her granddaughter.

  “I wasn’t meant to be with the angels, mijita.”

  “Don’t say goodbye, Welita. Please. There has to be a way. There has to—”

  “Shh.” Welita wiped her thumbs against Naomi’s cheeks, brushing away the fresh tears. “This is life. I’m ready to move to the next part of it with your father and mother. I won’t be alone. And one day, may it be a long way off, Chuy and the others will join us. I’ll have family with me.”

  “But I’m your family too,” she sobbed.

  “And you’ll always be. But you have your other family, too. Your heart is with Lash. He is your family. You were meant to do important work for Him. I couldn’t be prouder. Te amo, mijita.” Welita kissed her cheek and turned to Lash. “Take care of her.”

  “I will, Welita,” he said as Welita placed Naomi’s hand into his.

  She paused, keeping her hand over theirs for a moment. Then taking a deep breath, she turned to Jeremy. “I’m ready.”

  “Jeremy?”

  Jeremy jumped at Lash’s voice. He was lost in the defeated expression on Naomi’s face. He was doing this to her. He knew Welita’s life had to end, as all human life did. That fact didn’t take away the pain he felt knowing that it was his hand that was literally taking Welita away from her.

  “Give me your hand, Mrs. Duran,” Jeremy said.

  “Call me, Welita. You’re Lash’s brother. You’re family too.”

  He swallowed thickly as he gazed into kind brown eyes.

  “Welita.” He held out his open hand.

  Placing her hand in his, they walked to the blue-white light.

  “All you need to do is walk through. You’ll feel a warm energy rushing through your body. Don’t be frightened. Just keep walking, and you’ll be fine.”

  Nodding, Welita took a couple of steps into the shining orb. The light brightened as it encompassed her. It was so blinding, they could barely make out her silhouette. Her voice drifted back into the room, becoming more and more faint as Welita’s silhouette faded into the light as she walked closer to her new home.

  “I’ll carry you in my heart forever, mijita. Carry me in yours.”

  “Forever,” Naomi croaked.

  Then she was gone.

  25

  Jeremy watched Naomi as she stumbled forward, clutching her stomach, gasping. He wanted to be by her side. He wanted to brush the tears from her face. He wanted to hold her in his arms and feel her heart beating against his aching chest. Instead, it was Lash who was holding her, his haunted hazel eyes gazing at the empty light.

  Jeremy wasn’t done yet. He had to close the passage, and with it any hope of Naomi ever seeing her grandmother again.

  Shaking, he lifted his hand. The blue and white light swirled like a whirlwind crackling with electricity. Around it went, growing smaller until the sphere was the size of a marble.

  He paused, his hand trembling harder. He had to do it. He had to finish his job. He squeezed his eyes, fighting against the torment he felt as he listened to Naomi’s sobs.

  “Naomi, I’m sorry,” he said. Then with a final flick of his wrist, the sphere vanished.

  A cold rushed through him as Naomi took a step toward him. She was silent. No crying. No pleas. Nothing.

  She stopped in front of the window. Moonlight poured over her grief-stricken face. Slowly, her face twisted and blue ice glared at him. The words that came out of her lips were not from his beautiful, kind Naomi. They were from a stranger. Terse. Harsh. Cold.

  “Don’t you ever talk to me again. Ever!”

  “Naomi!” Lash cried.

  Naomi whirled around, snapping at him.

  “No, Lash. He’s your brother. I’m his sister. Families are supposed to help each other.”

  “But—”

  “I don’t want to hear it, Lash. I begged him to help. Begged him.”

  “Let me explain,” Jeremy said.

  She whirled around toward Jeremy, eyes still blazing. “There is nothing you can say that could ever explain what you did. Nothing!”

  With a sharp crack, she flapped her wings and disappeared from the room.

  Wide-eyed, Lash turned to him. “She’s talking crazy. She doesn’t mean it. I know you did what you could. I’ll talk to her.”

  “Wait.” Jeremy grabbed his arm before he could leave. “Let me. I . . . I need to.”

  Lash nodded with understanding. “Just know, no matter what happens, you’ll always be my brother.”

  * * *

  The cold air bit Jeremy’s face as he rocketed through the sky. He saw Naomi in the distance, her wings flapping listlessly, shoulders shaking as she made her way back home. Each sob was like a knife plunging into his chest.

  He’d done this to her. He’d broken her heart. He had to fix it somehow.

  With powerful wings, he propelled himself forward.

  When he was just about to reach her, her head snapped up.

  “Leave me alone!” She flapped her wings harder, widening the distance between them.

  “Let me explain,” he said as they soared through the sky. She flew faster. The wind rushed over his ears as he called out to her. Although his wings were larger and more powerful, he could barely keep up with her. Each time he was just about to reach her, she gritted her teeth, letting out a growl, and flew out of his reach.

  “I was doing my job! Can’t you understand?”

  Naomi stopped. Her wings slowly moved as she floated in the air. It was so sudden, he came to a buffeting halt, almost crashing into the back of her.

  Curling her wings, with a squealing arch, she spun around to face him.

  “Your job? YOUR JOB?” she screamed. “Is that all my grandmother was to you? A job?”

  “I didn’t mean it that way.” He swallowed thickly, praying for the right words to help her see he’d had no choice in the matter. “We’re angels. We each have a job to do. I was doing mine.”

  “Really? You’re going to stick with that excuse? You know we have free will. You didn’t even try!”

  “You’re a seraph now, Naomi. You need to understand how
it works for us.”

  “Oh, I understand.” Her voice shook as she approached him, coming within inches of his face. “I understand that you’re so used to having everything, you have no clue what it means to truly give yourself to another person. I understand that all you care about is your precious archangel status and being worshipped by everyone who sees you. Centuries later and you still think of yourself as a god among men—and even angels! You have all these angelic powers, and not once did you sacrifice for someone other than yourself.”

  He jerked back as if he’d been slapped. “That’s not true. I went after Lash. I went into the Lake of Fire for him. I died for him.”

  “See? The thought of sacrifice is so beyond you, you don’t even know what I’m talking about. Giving your life up for someone is easy. But can you give up your powers, the gifts that make you great? Can you give up your control of others?”

  “I don’t control anyone.”

  “Oh my God! You still don’t see it, do you? You say you love someone, and you expect the love to come back to you. You tried to control me!”

  “I didn’t.”

  “Yes, you did. You used your powers to draw me to you.”

  “That was a long time ago, and it wasn’t intentional. I didn’t even know I had them.”

  She shook her head. “You still can’t see it. You tell me you love me. You tell me you want me more than a sister. Why would you tell me that when you know Lash is the love of my life? What purpose would it serve?”

  “I . . . I . . .” He didn’t have an answer.

  “That’s what I thought. I’m done with you.”

  Before she could turn to leave, he grabbed her arm.

  “Don’t do this, Naomi. You’re upset and grieving. You’ll feel better, it just takes time.”

  “Stop patronizing me!” She scowled, jerking her arm out of his grasp. “Look, let me make this simple for you. You keep to your job and I’ll keep to mine. We don’t have to work together. So stay away from me. Got that, almighty archangel?”

  “I’m just trying to help.”

  “You can help by leaving me alone.”

  “I don’t know if I can,” he murmured.

  “Then maybe you should leave.”

  He sucked in a breath, the wind knocked out of him. Sapphire eyes gazed at her in disbelief. Whatever love she’d had to give him was lost now, and there was no hope of getting it back.

  “Goodbye, Jeremy.”

  26

  He didn’t know how much time had passed. The dark sky lightened, and the rising sun warmed his back.

  Naomi had said goodbye. She wanted him to leave.

  He shook his head. No. It was not goodbye, not like this, not with her hating him.

  He flew back home and headed straight to Lash and Naomi’s mountain cottage.

  “Naomi.” He rushed through the rooms, searching for her. It seemed like a lifetime had passed since he’d last been here. Had it really only been yesterday? Yesterday, when he’d been holding on to her pillow, inhaling her scent. Yesterday, when she’d called him brother and begged him not to leave.

  Leaving the empty cottage, he flew over the angel living quarters. As he passed the courtyard, he spotted Rachel and Uri. Rachel jumped up and down waving for him to join them.

  “You’re back,” she said when he landed in front of her.

  “Have you seen, Naomi?”

  “She’s with Lash and Rebecca. Over there.” She pointed to the benches under the cherry trees. “I know what happened.”

  “Lash told you.”

  She nodded. Her tiny, heart-shaped face filled with sadness.

  “Naomi still loves you, you know.”

  “Not anymore.”

  “Yes, she does. Give her some time.”

  “My Rachel knows what she’s talking about,” Uri said, slapping his back. “I’m sorry, my friend. I tried to take over for you.”

  “Thank you, Uri.” Jeremy sighed. Even if Uri had taken over, he doubted it would’ve helped anything. He would still be back where he’d been before—loving a woman who didn’t love him the way he hoped to be loved. He didn’t know which was worse—being loved as a brother or hated.

  Naomi sat on one of the benches with Rebecca. Lash and Raphael stood behind them, quietly talking to each other. Naomi had her head on his mother’s shoulder. Rebecca’s normally gentle smile was gone. The grief on Naomi’s face was reflected in her eyes. She’d watched over Welita for many years. It didn’t surprise him that she’d grieve too.

  As Jeremy walked toward them, he saw Gabrielle in the distance, standing on the bridge. Emerald eyes watched the angelic family with longing, a yearning to be with a family she didn’t belong to.

  Then it hit him.

  He was on the outside looking in too.

  “My son,” Raphael said when he spotted him. “Come with us.”

  “No, I don’t want him here,” Naomi said, glaring at him.

  “My love, this wasn’t Jeremy’s fault,” Lash said.

  “He didn’t have to do what he did. You wouldn’t have done it, even if it meant being cast out,” she said.

  “Naomi,” Rebecca’s soft voice spoke as she placed a delicate hand over hers. “This is our way of life. We each have our purpose.”

  “But we have free will, too. Raphael, you told me we do.”

  “That is correct. But—”

  “I knew it.” Naomi interrupted before Raphael could finish. Her slender neck arched as she turned to look up at Lash. “You would’ve saved Welita if you could, wouldn’t you? For me?”

  There was a beat of silence as Lash looked at Jeremy apologetically.

  “Yes, I would,” his voice cracked.

  Naomi turned back to Jeremy, her lips pressed into a thin line for a moment before she spoke.

  “See, Jeremy? Lash would’ve done it in a heartbeat. You didn’t even try. How can you call yourself my brother?”

  Jeremy gazed into cold blue eyes. This was goodbye after all.

  “You’re right. I have no right to call myself brother.” With those words, he turned and marched toward the bridge.

  Lash and Raphael rushed over to him, speaking to him at the same time.

  “Give her time, my son.”

  “She’ll come around, bro, really, she will.”

  He gazed into their eyes. He loved them so much. He didn’t want to leave them. But he couldn’t be here, either. He couldn’t tell them his plan. If they knew, they would never let him leave.

  Plastering his signature grin on his face, he said, “I know. Don’t sweat it. I just need to check in with Gabrielle about something.”

  Guilt gnawed in the back of his mind when relief washed over their faces. They slapped him on the back and headed back to Naomi. As much as he longed to be with them a little longer, he knew what he had to do. And he had to do it now, before he changed his mind.

  As he headed to Gabrielle, he admonished himself for not sticking to his plan and doing it yesterday. If he’d done it yesterday, he would’ve been leaving with the memory of Naomi’s face loving a brother. Now all he had was the hate in her eyes. There was no way he could live like that. It was too much to take.

  “Gabrielle, I’ve made up my mind. I’ve decided to take the leave you’ve offered. But I want more than that. I want permanent status on Earth.”

  She looked at him with shock. “That’s not possible.”

  “Of course it is. I could ask Michael myself, if you’re uncomfortable asking.”

  “I’ve just met with Michael. I told him about Saleos. He’s commanded that all assignments must be done in pairs. He doesn’t want anyone leaving to Earth alone.”

  “I can handle myself against Saleos and his brothers. No problem.” He pushed the thought of how he could barely move when Jether and Joab had latched on to him. There was no way he was staying here. He had to get out.

  “Can you?”

  “Of course. You doubt my strength?”

  “
Yes.”

  He blinked, stunned. His strength had never been challenged.

  “If you’re referring to what happened with Joab and Jether, I won’t let that happen again. I was caught off guard. I’ll keep an eye out for them.”

  “It’s not your physical strength I’m worried about. It’s the temptation.”

  At that moment, he thought of how Saleos, with a mere whisper in his ear, had taken away the crushing pain in his chest, bringing him blissful peace.

  “The temptation to give in to what he has to offer is too strong.” Her eyes flicked to Naomi and the others huddled around her. “Especially now.”

  “You’re wrong.”

  “I don’t think I am. Don’t forget, I’ve been in your place.”

  He thought of the longing he’d seen on her face. She’d felt the temptation too. He sensed it.

  “I can control myself,” he said.

  “If that’s true, then you’ll stay. Those are Michael’s orders. Saleos is taking over Lucifer’s place, and he’s using different tactics. He’s taking the fallen over to his side by promising them their heart’s desires. He’s shown you yours, hasn’t he?”

  A vision of Naomi wearing a sheer gown flashed through his mind.

  “I won’t fall for his tactics. You don’t have to worry about that.”

  “The answer is still no. We can pair you with Rachel or Uri when you go on assignments, if you want. That’ll make things easier for you.”

  He frowned. He was an archangel. All his life, he’d listened to what others had told him to do. He’d done his duty. Now he was being treated like a newly trained seraph.

  “No.”

  Gabrielle’s eyes widened with disbelief. Even he couldn’t believe he’d told her no.

  “Excuse me?”

  “I’m leaving . . . and I don’t know when I’ll be returning.” He drew out his wings to their full length, showing her their strength and power. “I’m the archangel of death. I’m a highly ranked angel. I’m one of the most powerful angels in Heaven. I’m leaving.”

  Taking one last look at her astonished face, he leapt up, propelling himself into the sky. He fought the urge to look down at his family. If he did, he knew he wouldn’t be able to leave.