DARE SERIES COLLECTION
Page 22
“I might not understand why you did it, but I know what it’s like to have a secret. You told me that you knew what it was like to be powerless. To have no control. We are the same, Cole. You blame yourself for losing your friends, and I blamed myself for a man wanting me. It took me years to realize he was the one in the wrong. And I had to figure that out on my own. I didn’t have anyone to explain it to me. To help me.” He releases a long breath, looking away from me. “So I’m gonna tell you what someone should have told me.” His eyes come back to mine, and I walk over to him. I reach out to cup his face, and the sheet falls to the floor at my feet. Another tear runs down my face, and he gently wipes it away. “It wasn’t your fault, Cole.”
He lowers his forehead down to mine and closes his eyes. “We’re not the same, Austin. Because unlike you, I wasn’t innocent.” He pulls away and stares down at me. “I knew what we were doing. We went to a party like we always did. Got drunk like we always did. And then left. I took the blame because I should have been the one driving. In a matter of minutes, they were … just gone.” His voice is rough as if he had been holding those words in for a long time. My tears start to fall faster.
“I’m sorry, Cole. I’m so sorry.”
He wraps his arms around me and pulls me to him. “I’m sorry too, sweetheart.” He kisses my hair.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
COLE
I REACH OUT and push a piece of hair behind her ear. Her eyes stare into mine, and I can see the fresh tears she hasn’t allowed to fall yet. This is when she’s the most gorgeous, when they make her green eyes look like they’re swimming in a pool of water. A tear finally escapes, and I wipe it away.
But I hate why they’re there. I hate that someone else can make her cry. I want to do that. I want to take from her.
I’m a fucking bastard.
Her mother and her fucking boyfriend will pay for what they have done to her. I’ll make sure of it. Just as I did with Jeff.
Her hands go to my jeans, and she undoes them. I grab her wrists. “Austin.”
“I need you, Cole,” she whispers, pushing her hips into mine.
And warmth spreads through me at those words.
She needs me.
Releasing her wrists, I slide my hands into her hair and kiss her. Desperately. Because I need her too. We’ve both been ripped open and are bleeding. Something needs to cover the pain.
She kisses me back just as aggressively. My pants hit my ankles, and I step out of them. Then we’re walking backward. I fall onto the couch, my lips breaking from hers. She straddles me, her hand going between our bodies, and she grabs my hard dick. My head falls back to rest on the cushion, and I moan as she strokes me. Slow but firm. Teasing. I close my eyes and feel her lips on my neck. Sucking, licking, and biting.
“Fuck, Austin …” I trail off when she slides onto my hard cock. My breath instantly taken away.
My hands go to her narrow hips, and she begins to move. My fingers dig into her skin as our bodies slap. She sucks on my neck, and all I can do is sit here and pant as she rides me. Has her way with me.
She’s incredible.
And all fucking mine.
My hands let go of her hips, and I slide them in her hair. Yanking her lips from my neck, I lift my head and slam them to mine. I kiss her with need. She pants in my mouth while her hips continue to work with mine.
Her pussy tightens around me, and she pulls her lips away, sucking in a long breath. I lean forward, pulling her hard nipple between my teeth. She cries out when I bite down on it, before sucking it gently.
“Cole.” She whimpers my name, and I yank her head back, exposing her neck to me, and I do the same thing to her. I kiss, lick, bite, and suck every inch of her like it belongs to me. Because she does.
She needs me.
I need her.
We’re like the devil is to sin. Without one, we wouldn’t have the other.
_______________
I stand in the middle of the loft, listening to the shower turn on when my cell rings. I pick up my phone to see Deke flash across my screen.
“Hello?” I ask, looking over at the bathroom door, hoping he doesn’t have much to say. She said she needed a shower after she was done with me, and I want to join her.
“Hey, man.” He sighs. “Becky made me call you.” I frown. “She won’t stop bugging me. But she wants to know if you guys wanna go to lunch.”
“I’m craving Italian,” I hear her yell in the background.
“I tried to tell her you would say no. That it’s not like that—”
“We can go,” I interrupt him.
He’s silent for a long second. “Come again?”
“We’ll go. What time?” It’s just another way for me to show her off. To prove to the world that she’s mine.
Nothing else.
“Uh, an hour?” he asks slowly.
“Okay. See you then.” I hang up.
Walking into the bathroom, I see her inside the shower. I open it up and enter. “We’re going to lunch with Becky and Deke in an hour.”
She stops shampooing her hair and looks at me. Her brows pull together. “Why?”
“Because Deke called and asked.” I place my hands on her hips and press her back into the wall.
“Again, why would he call and ask?”
I smirk. “Because Becky made him.”
She laughs. “He’s so whipped.”
“You are correct. But he’s been in love with her since sophomore year. So it’s not like I didn’t see that coming.”
Her eyes widen. “What?”
I nod. “He never tried to get with her, though. Knew that she was the type of girl who deserved more than what he was willing to give.”
She frowns. “But you just said he loved her. Why wouldn’t he want to be with her? Doesn’t make sense.”
“He knew he’d break her heart. Too many options out there to stay with just one.”
Her eyes narrow on mine. We haven’t had the talk if I’m sleeping with other girls even though I think she suspects it. I don’t know if she’s afraid I’ll say yes if she asks, or if she just doesn’t care.
She slides out from between me and the wall, moving back under the spray to rinse out her shampoo. “So why now? Thought he would play with her since senior year is almost over?”
She uses the same word Bryan said I’m doing with her. “No. When he was ready to settle down with her last year, she was already in a serious relationship.”
“David,” she says. I nod. “She told me that Deke asked her if what he had heard was true about their breakup that night you guys showed up at the party.” Leaning her head back, she runs her hands over her hair, making sure all the suds are gone. I watch the way her back arches and her tits push out, and lick my lips. “So now what? He’s changed his old ways?” She looks at me skeptically. “Because I watched him swallow a girl’s tongue that night you threw a party at your house. That was just five days before they hooked up.”
“What did you expect? Him to live his life pining for her?” I shake my head. “That’s not how Deke works. Not how any guy with a set of balls works.”
She rolls her eyes. “God forbid a man show a woman he actually has a heart.”
I ignore that statement. “What about you?”
“What about me?” She pours some conditioner in her hand and runs it through her long dark hair.
“You and Martin.”
Her hands freeze midway, and her eyes narrow on me. But she doesn’t answer.
I take a step toward her. “I want you to delete any picture that you have of him off your social media page.”
She tries to shove me away, but her hands are covered in conditioner, so they slide right off. “And I told you when you get a social media page, I’ll do that.” She gives me a big fuck you smile. Like she just asked me to give her the fucking moon. As if it’s impossible.
“I do have one.”
She throws her head back, laughing.
“You’re so full of shit.”
I arch a brow. “Wanna bet.”
Her laughter dies down, and her eyes search mine, looking for any indication that I’m pulling her chain. I’m not.
She shakes her head in acceptance. “You’re such a dick.”
“Did you love him?” The words are out of my mouth before I can even stop them. I try not to flinch at the question.
Her eyes narrow on me. “Why do you care, Cole?” she snaps, her patience with this conversation running short. I don’t blame her. I’m not one to talk about pointless shit. But this is important.
Since I first laid eyes on Austin Lowes, I’ve wanted to control her. Own her. Hurt her. What more can a guy take from a woman than their love? Their soul?
She won’t turn on someone she loves, was what Shane had said when we were all standing in the middle of the clubhouse the night I had Deke take her home after I stole her father’s car. I didn’t understand what he meant until now.
Now it makes perfect fucking sense!
I want Austin Lowes to fall in love with me.
AUSTIN
He’s up to something.
Of course, he is. If Cole Reynolds is breathing, then he is up to no good. He doesn’t understand how well I can read him. Or that I’ve been fed bullshit lines all my life. I’m not the girl who believes in fairy tales and happily ever afters.
“Yes,” I say, playing along with his game.
His eyes narrow on me, but I ignore it. Instead, I go back to running conditioner through my hair. At this rate, the water is going to be cold soon.
“How long were you guys together?” he asks.
“Almost four years.” Not a total lie.
“You’re seventeen,” he argues as if I can’t do the math.
“Yes. Thanks for the reminder,” I say and turn around, giving him my back. I run the water over my face and tilt my head down to rinse out the conditioner. I could have stayed facing him but didn’t feel like it.
Once done, I turn back around, and he stands there staring at me. His impatience evident in his narrowed eyes and sharp jaw. “We got together my freshman year. He was a senior.”
“And?”
“And what?” I ask, not knowing what all he wants to know.
“What else?” he demands.
I place my hands on my hips and tilt my head. If he wants to know, then I’ll tell him. Because it’s just going to piss him off anyway. And I love to piss this guy off. “At the time, I was fourteen, and he was seventeen. He asked me out, and I said yes. We dated for a few weeks, then I gave it up.” His jaw sharpens. “After that, we were together. His uncle owned a tattoo and body piercing shop. After Martin graduated high school, he went to work with him.”
His eyes go to my side, and he demands, “He gave you that tattoo?”
“Yep.”
His eyes snap back up to mine, and I can see the rage behind them. He hates that another man marked me. Too bad. It’s not like I let Martin write his name across my ass. “And then I had to move here. End of story.”
“Do you still talk to him?” he asks, pressing.
I hate that the truth is no. That what I thought meant something was really nothing to Martin. He was there for me in a lot of ways. He never asked what went on in my house, but he knew. He kept me busy. Always wanted to hang out. He was a major pot head, and we spent most of our time high or drunk, but he still always made sure to come and get me to do things. He even taught me how to drive. He did the things that my mother and father should have shown me.
“Yes,” I lie, looking down at the drain. Because I’m not going to tell a man who wants to break me that a guy I thought I loved no longer speaks to me.
He grabs my chin and lifts my head to where I have to look up at him. “Delete the pictures, Austin. You’re mine now. Not his.” Then he lets go of me and steps out of the shower.
_______________
After the shower, I walk out to find Cole on his cell, already dressed in a fresh pair of jeans and a clean black t-shirt. I’m not sure where they came from because I never saw him with a bag last night. I dig through my overnight bag and put on a new pair of jean shorts and t-shirt that says CALI across it in red letters. After I throw on my tennis shoes, I dry my hair.
I didn’t bring any makeup or a straightener, so I throw my hair up in a messy bun once dry and call it good. This’ll have to do for lunch.
I’m coming down the stairs when I spot him sitting on the couch. He’s got his legs crossed at the ankles and his head down staring at his phone as he types away.
He looks up at me and stands. We haven’t spoken since he told me to delete those pictures and that I belonged to him now.
I really didn’t have much to say on that matter. He thinks he’s got me where he wants me. I’m not going to say otherwise.
He takes my bag from my hand and opens the door for me. I mumble a thank you and fall into the passenger seat while he places my bag in the trunk. I look around for Deke’s Range Rover but don’t see where Cole parked it last night. He must have already come and got it.
“Where is your phone?” he asks.
“Why?”
He blows out a long breath, hating when I don’t just answer his questions. “Because Celeste called me saying she’s been trying to get a hold of you. But it goes straight to voicemail.”
“It died last night while at the beach, and I forgot my charger.”
“I’ll plug it in,” he says, opening his center console to grab his charger. I see his gun and knife in there before he shuts it.
I remove it from my back pocket and hand it to him. “What did she want?” I ask after he plugs it in.
“She wanted to know if you were going to be home tonight.”
I nod my head. “Of course—”
“I told her no,” he interrupts me.
“What?” I demand.
“You’ll be with me.”
I laugh like he’s lost his mind. “And where will we be?”
He doesn’t answer, just like always, and I fall back into my seat, crossing my arms over my chest.
I hate that he brings out every emotion in me. I hate how I told him secrets about me to get him to open up, but it didn’t work. He didn’t tell me anything that I hadn’t already figured out about his friends dying. I stood there and told him things that no one else knows. And although he looked pissed, like he cared about what Phillip had done, he didn’t give me what I really wanted. His story. His hate. His secrets. It’s not fair.
Life isn’t fair, my mother always says. But it’s seemed pretty fucking fair to her if you ask me.
She fucked a man once and got knocked up. I was here nine months later. The only reason she had me was because she met a wealthy, good-looking man who only wanted a one-night stand. She saw me as her meal ticket. Even now that I’m living with him, my father still sends her monthly checks. But those will stop soon. I’ll be eighteen and graduated. I don’t know the law exactly, but I had a friend whose father stopped paying for her after she graduated high school last year.
Then what will my mother do? Will she beg me for money? Have me ask him? It won’t happen. I won’t get her a dime.
“Take it out on Me” by Thousand Foot Krutch starts to play through the speakers. I reach over and turn it up to try to drown out my own thoughts.
It doesn’t.
I look over at him, and his left hand is on the steering wheel while his right is on the shifter. He wears his normal mask that hides his true thoughts and feelings from the world, but I see it. I thought it was anger, but after our talk earlier, I realize it’s pain. He’s hurting. He just refuses to let anyone see it. To see the real him.
He reaches out and turns off the radio. We sit in silence, and I wonder what he’s thinking. If his mind is screaming as loud as mine is.
I look down at my hands knotted in my lap. “You know I would never tell anyone about what happened.” He has to know by now that, no matter what, he ca
n trust me. He’s blackmailed me to keep my mouth shut, but I would never tell a soul that he wasn’t the one driving. He took that blame on his own for a reason, and I would never out him. No matter how much I disagree with it.
“Why did you take Jerrold’s laptop?” he asks, ignoring my statement.
My brows rise, surprised by that question. “You know why,” I say, not going back down that road. He doesn’t want to share, then I won’t either.
“I know why you are on our side when it comes to him. But I want to know why that dare? Why not something else?”
“It was the only dare I could think of,” I answer honestly. “I tried to think of things that you had told me about, and I wanted to help Eli’s sister. I thought maybe there was some info on there that you could use. You could get him arrested …”
His soft laugh interrupts me. “His ass isn’t going to jail, sweetheart.”
“Then what …?” My words trail off as I understand. “You’re gonna kill him too?” I ask wide-eyed.
“Of course.” He snorts.
Death too must be earned. He had said that to me that day in his car as we watched Jerrold in his office. “You’re gonna get caught,” I say, fisting my hands.
“No, we won’t.”
“You didn’t even do a good job with Jeff.” I roll my eyes at his confidence.
He looks over at me for a quick second. “What are you talking about?”
“It took me twenty minutes to dig him up. It would take a full-grown man half that. You didn’t bury him very deep. And you weren’t very smart.” He opens his mouth, but I continue. “You left him dressed in the clothes that had your blood on them. You should be thanking me that I burned his body.” He shuts his mouth. “Plus, you buried him right next to where Eli’s sister is. Very poetic. But anyone who would consider someone close to her as a suspect, would go there first.”