My Sisters And Me

by Lisa Dickenson

  ‘Just a few. There’s a beer waiting for you at the end.’

  ‘Ahh, motivation!’

  ‘All right that’s it,’ she said, handing up the last of Rae’s containers. ‘I just have one box, but I need to go through it quickly and see if I really want to keep any of it. Do you want to come down and keep me company, and I’ll get you that beer?’

  Emmy and Jared sat in her room with a beer each and a big bag of Sensations crisps between them, and Emmy pulled her box of keepsakes over.

  ‘You just have one box?’ Jared asked. ‘Didn’t I just move the equivalent of the Amazon warehouse into the attic for your sisters?’

  ‘I might not even have one box, actually,’ she replied, and tipped the box on its side, spilling out the contents. Together with her crop top, Baby-Sitters Club book and maths revision guide, she’d also stowed away two teddy bears, a 5ive tour T-shirt, a snow globe from Disneyland Paris that her father gave her, and a handful of toys and jewellery. It was all stuff she really didn’t need to keep, if she was honest.

  Apart from the teddy bears, because you can’t chuck those, they have feelings.

  ‘Do you think a charity shop would want my 5ive T-shirt?’

  Jared took a gulp from his beer. ‘Doubt it. You used to wear that all the time, though; you can’t get rid of that. What if you ever meet Ritchie? He’s not going to love you if he finds out you chucked his merch.’

  ‘I need to get rid of it,’ she smiled.

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Because I don’t care about this stuff any more. It’s just stuff. And also, it’s not like it’s really me any more.’

  ‘Is this about the party?’

  ‘No,’ she lied.

  ‘Is it about the aftermath of the party?’

  ‘No,’ she lied again.

  Jared slid down off the edge of the bed and sat next to her on the floor. ‘You know this is all very familiar. Classic Emmy.’

  ‘What do you mean?’ she asked, distracted by the storyline on the back of her Baby-Sitters Club book.

  ‘Up you get.’ He pulled her to her feet. ‘You can take a break for a couple of hours, right?’

  ‘Sure,’ she answered, confused. ‘But why?’

  ‘Good, you haven’t touched your beer yet, then you’re driving.’

  ‘Not far now… Okay, pull in right here.’

  Emmy turned into the parking area, where there were just two other cars. They’d been driving for close to an hour, deep into wild Dartmoor, and as they came to a stop, two sheep glanced up at them and chewed reflectively.

  ‘Come on,’ Jared said, jumping out of Noelle’s borrowed car.

  By the time Emmy had climbed out, done her coat up, found a hairband and locked the car, he was already on the grass.

  They were slap bang in the middle of breath-taking British scenery. Green surrounded them on all sides, cobbled with granite tors rising up from the hills. The wind was blowing a hooley, not that these hungry sheep cared, but it whipped Emmy’s split ends around like nobody’s business. Her eyes watered immediately. She loved it all.

  ‘What are we doing out here?’ she yelled over the whistling wind, laughing.

  ‘We’re going for a walk – up there.’ He pointed to the top of a nearby tor.

  She scrambled closer to him and grabbed his hand, letting him lead her on and upwards.

  The ground was hard and uneven, and more than once they stumbled. A pair of Dartmoor ponies watched them, their long hair shimmering in the gusts. Eventually, they made it up to the rocks, where they huddled together away from the direction of the wind, and looked out at the spectacular vista.

  ‘You can’t beat this view,’ Emmy breathed, her cheeks pink and her hair all over the shop.

  ‘You can’t?’ asked Jared. ‘Not even in the wonderful Oxfordshire?’

  Emmy shook her head. ‘So, can you tell me now how we jumped from my 5ive tour T-shirt to climbing a tor on the moors?’

  ‘Because of this, for one.’ Jared pointed out at the view. ‘I thought you could do with being reminded that your birthplace isn’t just Maplewood. It’s Devon. And all this is just as much yours as anyone else’s.’

  ‘Devon is Heaven, that’s what you always said,’ she nodded. He was right as well. She’d stayed in, blinker-visioned, way too much since being back. ‘God, I wish I’d come out here earlier, now I only have a week before going back home.’ Then she asked, ‘Back at the house, what did you mean by “classic Emmy”?’

  ‘Let me take you back.’ Jared snuggled in a little closer, putting his arm around Emmy. She wasn’t sure what he was about to say, or if she was going to like it, but she felt comfortable with whatever was coming with her best friend so close.

  Jared continued, ‘There was a time in our lives, we must have been sixteen? Maybe fifteen. And I remember you being so very similar to how you are now.’

  That surprised her. ‘I’m nothing like I was at sixteen.’

  ‘You don’t think? In some ways you aren’t, but believe me that in others you are.’ He leaned over and kissed her forehead suddenly, sweetly. ‘You were having a rough time at school. Not with the work but with the people. The bullying was pretty relentless – in their stupid eyes you were always wearing the wrong thing, doing the wrong thing, saying the wrong thing. Tell me if any of this is too hard to hear.’

  Without realising, Emmy’s watering eyes had turned to tears. Not sobs, just tears of resignation and recognition of her past. She let him rest his head on hers, and he spoke softly, his breath gentle and warm against her hair.

  ‘You ignored it for so long – you wouldn’t tell your mum and dad, Rae was gone by this point, and you began to shut me out. You said we couldn’t be friends any more.’

  ‘They were making comments about you to me. About how I fancied you but you’d never be more than my friend because I was too flat-chested and too stuck-up and too poor.’

  ‘None of which was true, as demonstrated by my unwavering love for you.’

  Emmy had always loved Jared; he was the kindest person she’d ever known. She didn’t quite understand in what way she loved him, she just knew she did.

  ‘So,’ he said. ‘I came over one day to see what the heck was going on. And you were doing much like you were doing today – packing up all the things that meant something to you, ready to throw it all away. Including me, and including your GCSEs. You didn’t want to be clever any more; you just wanted to be cool.’

  This was indeed sounding familiar, Emmy remembered the day well. She was giving up. She wanted to give all of it up and just fit in, and she was willing to lose everything just for the peace that comes with being part of the crowd.

  Jared met her eye, forcing her to look away from the view and at him. ‘But then, and now, you were never the problem that needed fixing. Not a single thing about you needed to change. Teenage Emmy was perfect, and she and her amazing mind and her kind disposition made her go on to be the person you are today. So, I need you to not throw her away. And I need you to stay strong around the bullies one more time, and don’t let them decide what happens to you and your memories.’

  Emmy inhaled the cold Devon air, deep into her lungs. Maybe she wasn’t on edge, or stressed out or upset. Maybe she was on the edge, on the edge of something life-changing. Was she going to take flight – or fight?

  Chapter 25

  The following day, Gabbi came downstairs from Rae’s room at a leisurely ten o’clock in the morning. Emmy and Noelle were already up, working together to hang some natural-finish floating wood shelves in the kitchen. Noelle had found the shelves in Jenny’s shop, and they fitted perfectly with their Devon woodland theme. She’d bought dozens of them, to put in every room.

  ‘I’ve cancelled tonight,’ Gabbi announced, helping herself to a bowl of Coco Pops.

  ‘You’ve cancelled Bonfire Night?’ Noelle asked, a screw hanging out of the corner of her mouth.

  ‘Not the whole thing, but I’m not going to be the on
e lighting the bonfire any more. I’ve asked Sid to do it on my behalf.’

  ‘But why? Your make-up kit thing will surely come today, and the words have faded a bit now anyway. With a good Sharpie I might actually be able to turn that into “Maplewood is full of dudes”.’ Noelle tightened the screw in place and then turned around to peer at Gabbi’s cheek.

  ‘I don’t want to risk it. And anyway, my nose still hurts. Just one more day and then I’ll hopefully be back to normal.’

  Emmy stood back to admire their handiwork. One more day, one more day, one more day… Considering Gabbi was an elected mayor, she seemed very reluctant to utilise any problem-solving skills for herself.

  Her phone bleeped – a text message from Bonnie. ‘Ummmmmmmmm, you might wanna check the FB page…’

  ‘Noelle,’ she said, bringing the laptop to the breakfast bar. ‘Bonnie just said we should look at the house page on Facebook.’ She navigated to the page and scrolled down. There was a photo from the party – quite a few in fact, and Emmy cringed at one of her dancing in the background with ten million chins – but the photo at the top was of the mayor. Not at the party, an official one, of Gabbi, arms folded, smiling at the camera.

  ‘That’s me!’ said Gabbi. ‘Why am I on there? Do people know I was at your party?’

  Emmy clicked on the picture and looked at the caption. ‘It says, “Where is our mayor? She is being held captive in this house!!!!!!! She’s not coming to the annual Bonfire Night!!!!!! We must save her!!!!!!!” That’s a stupid amount of exclamation marks, and you’re hardly being held captive,’ she added, thinking, We’re trying anything to make you leave.

  ‘Why do they think I’m being held hostage? I thought it was only the police that thought that.’

  ‘I thought you’d set that right by now?’ Emmy answered.

  ‘Well, there’s no telling some people… What do those comments say – I haven’t got my contacts in yet?’

  Emmy read on. ‘The first comment is by the same person that posted the photo. It says, “Hardly anyone’s seen Mayor Reynold since her house was trashed on Halloween – the same night these sisters threw a huge party that got completely out of hand. They’ve got her at their house and they’re refusing to let her out!!!!!!!!!”’

  Noelle was leaning over as well, and read another comment out loud. ‘“Agree with above – I heard she was seen out yesterday with bandages all over her face and the sisters wouldn’t let her be on her own. Do you reckon they beat her up?”’ Noelle laughed. ‘Why would we beat you up?’

  ‘According to this one, because we’re “completely jealous of her making something of her life. These sisters need to get a bloody life of their own”.’ Emmy sighed. Yet again, judgements based on no facts whatsoever. She read on, picking out bits and pieces from various comments. ‘This one says, “Blah blah blah, I heard they were blackmailing her to pay for the house, how else would they afford it”, then “My taxes aren’t going on that dump”, “Mayor Reynold needs to be rescued, she’s such a lovely girl”, and wait, this one says “Shall we all go over there?”’

  ‘“Shall we all go over there?”’ Noelle echoed. ‘Over here? What would they all do if they came over here?’

  ‘I don’t know, the comments end there. That was about twenty minutes ago. So it could be nothing, or it could be that they’ve moved on to Messenger or something.’

  ‘I don’t want them to come over here,’ said Noelle.

  ‘They won’t – this is a bunch of wannabe paranormal investigators sat behind computer screens. It’s all talk,’ she soothed her little sister. ‘But Gabbi, you need to get out there and make some kind of statement. As soon as that make-up kit arrives today.’

  At that moment, the door swung open and in walked Rae, looking refreshed, her hair still in soft curls from a posh up-do the night before. ‘Good morning everyone!’

  ‘Hi!’ Noelle zoomed over and hugged Rae, followed by Emmy. ‘How was last night?’

  ‘It went so well. I was worried my voice would have got a bit lazy but it was great! I was so buzzing I barely slept, so I got up early and came straight back down. Wouldn’t want to miss the last week of renovations,’ she said, raising her eyebrows at Emmy and walking into the kitchen. ‘Oh,’ she said, seeing Gabbi. ‘You’re still here. Still calling everyone the c-word.’

  ‘That’s just what we were talking about, actually,’ Emmy said, sitting back in front of the computer.

  ‘I’m just going to go for a wee,’ Gabbi said, legging it.

  ‘What?’ said Rae, looking from one sister to another.

  ‘She’s got to go,’ Emmy said bluntly. ‘We can’t keep looking after her, it’s making people talk and she’s just getting in the way.’

  ‘For god’s sake,’ Rae sighed, wandering over to pour herself a coffee. ‘It’s just helping out a friend for a few days. Aren’t you used to people talking by now?’

  ‘But she’s your friend, and you left. We’re telling you we’ve had enough.’

  ‘You’re still angry at me for leaving? I had a job to do!’

  ‘We have jobs too,’ Emmy retorted. ‘And we took sabbaticals, like we agreed, for the whole time.’

  ‘It was three nights! You do know we’re going back to our real lives in a week anyway, you two are going to have to go back to surviving without the mother here.’ She pointed at herself. She was loath to admit it – not to herself, and definitely not to her sisters – but she’d actually felt pretty rubbish running away and leaving them this time. It didn’t feel as refreshing as it had when she was younger. It felt like quitting, on family.

  ‘It’s not about us not surviving without you; it’s about you leaving us alone to deal with your mess!’ This time, Emmy was fighting, not flighting.

  ‘I’m sorry about that, but come on, is that big a deal? This is not our real lives.’

  Gabbi came back into the room and rolled her eyes at Rae. ‘They have been on my back,’ she laughed. ‘Glad I don’t have any little sisters.’

  ‘Hey.’ Rae turned to her, good mood vanished. Oh hell no, you don’t bash my sisters. ‘This isn’t about you, Gabbi. My sisters aren’t here to look after you and help you cover up your mistakes, they’re here – we’re here – to do up our family home. But they’re helping you anyway.’

  Gabbi looked a bit embarrassed.

  Rae downed the coffee and poured another one, then continued, ‘In fact, it’s never been about the family home; it’s about we sisters being back together and spending time together, and doing something meaningful for us and for our mum. So don’t make it about you or say they aren’t doing everything you need well enough.’

  ‘Fine – sorry, and thank you,’ Gabbi huffed, holding up her hands. ‘I’m going to go and get dressed.’

  When she’d left the room, Emmy walked over to Rae and wrapped her arms around her, causing her coffee to slosh. Noelle joined them.

  Rae smiled at her family. ‘All right, no need to be a twat about it.’

  ‘I think it’s nothing,’ Rae said a little while later, after being filled in on the activity on the Facebook page. ‘It’s all talk.’

  The sisters were taking a walk around the outside of the house and the woods, clearing some debris as they went.

  ‘You’re probably right,’ said Noelle, swinging a rake at her side. ‘How did Mum and Dad deal with it, though, all this constant talk?’

  ‘I don’t think they did have to deal with it – it was like Jenny said when she was over, somehow the attitude towards them changed long ago. We got the brunt of it instead, I guess.’

  ‘All right then,’ Emmy said. ‘So how did they turn the town around? How did they change people’s minds when they were so intent on a witch hunt?’

  ‘Maybe they did send around that naked photo, with their middle fingers up and the witch’s hat, and maybe it so made a mockery of what they were being accused of that people felt silly and just gave up?’ Noelle suggested.

  Rae kicked a branch o
ut of her way. ‘I think we should just ignore them.’

  ‘I don’t think we should any more,’ Emmy replied. ‘We’ve tried ignoring them, we’ve tried being nice to them, and still they grab hold of any possible rumour and next thing we know they’re threatening to who knows what. Storm the house and rescue Gabbi? They can have her!’

  ‘So what do you suggest?’

  ‘Well, I don’t know, actually. I’d like to be more like Mum, but I don’t know how.’

  ‘You can’t please everyone,’ Noelle said all of a sudden. ‘Haters gonna hate, and all that. I don’t think we need to change at all, actually, or be more like Mum; I think it comes down to just being ourselves, and people can take us or leave us. Let’s not wave a white flag, let’s go down with the ship. Stick our middle fingers up and laugh it off.’

  Chapter 26

  ‘We’re not even having a Guy Fawkes?’ Rae clarified, displeasure on her face.

  ‘Nope.’ Emmy shook her head. ‘We can’t; if we’re going to have a mini Bonfire Night around the campfire by the den it has to be just that – mini. We don’t want the whole woods going up in flames. I got us sparklers, though.’

  ‘Jenny’s going to pick up some apples on the way over so we can make toffee apples,’ Noelle said, wandering into the kitchen. ‘And I also just spoke with Bonnie, who said there’s been no further activity on the Facebook page. People have got bored of themselves, evidently. She’s going to remove the post as soon as she’s home from work. We do need to meet up with her before we leave, though, because she wants a couple more quotes for her article, and a photo of the finished house.’

  ‘Is Jared coming?’ Rae asked.

  ‘Yep,’ Emmy answered. ‘Is Gabbi?’

  Rae looked towards the stairs. ‘I might make her. She can’t hide in my room for ever; I need to finish it off. Even if that make-up thing doesn’t show up, I think it’s time she just showed Jared.’

  And when Jared showed up late that afternoon, Gabbi’s make-up still hadn’t. But she’d succumbed to sticking the plasters back over her face and graced them all with her presence as they trundled back and forth between the house and the den, taking snack foods, drinks, blankets, gloves and more food out with them.