by Toni Blake
“You…wanna come in?” she asked, still teary-eyed. “I need to take care of Emmy, but…I could put something on your scratches, too.”
Derek took a deep breath. She’d invited him in. And it wasn’t the first time for that, of course. Yet he somehow had the feeling that if he accepted, everything would change. It was like standing on the edge of a precipice. Everything inside him was telling him to just close his eyes and jump. But at the same time, a strange, futile fear invaded him—a fear he couldn’t fight down.
Holly watched his face, his eyes. It was as if some kind of panic had grown inside them—like she’d watched it take shape, forming visibly before her.
“Thanks,” he said, sounding rushed, “but, um, no.”
“No?” she asked softly.
“I’m gonna…go home and…call that idiot across the street and give him a piece of my mind, tell him to keep his stupid dog tied up.”
Then she watched him turn and go, quick as that.
She knew he was running away, from the situation, from his fear, from her, from Emily.
Still, even now, that was all he could seem to do—run.
And she broke into tears all over again, not just from what had just happened, but also because she knew now that Derek loved Emily—she’d seen it in his eyes and heard it in his voice—yet he’d made it clear that he would never stop running away from them.
Once inside, Holly lay Emily on the couch and took off her sunsuit to examine her for cuts or scrapes. Amazingly, and thankfully, she found no evidence of the accident. The she put Emily’s outfit back on her and sat on the couch, just hugging her. She thought she might sit there and hug her for the rest of the night.
But as she sat embracing her daughter, her thoughts returned to Derek. To the way he’d saved her child.
She herself had frozen in fright, but Derek had lunged to keep Emmy from crashing to the ground. It had all happened so fast, and yet he’d been there for Emmy—he’d responded by instinct. A father’s instinct.
This just went to prove what Holly had feared all along, that sometimes a mother wasn’t enough. Like she’d told Derek, and as he had just repeated to her, no one could be perfect all the time. And if Derek hadn’t been there…well, she couldn’t bear to even contemplate that. All she could think was—sometimes it took two people, two loving parents. That way if one of them messed up, the other was there.
It was all so clear to her now that it simply broke her heart. Derek loved her. And he loved her daughter. And they should be a family, damn it—a real family! They should be together, raising Emmy, and loving each other.
But somehow he couldn’t see that. Or he chose not to.
What she’d had with Bill had been…nice. Pleasant, even. But what she felt for Derek transcended any emotions she’d known before. And it was all there just waiting for them, just waiting for them to reach out and grab it. If only…
She released a heavy sigh. If only had not gotten her very far with Derek. She should know that by now. No matter what happened, no matter what kind of love she saw in his eyes for her or her baby, it didn’t change what he wanted, or what he didn’t want, out of life. She was going to have to come to grips with that once and for all. But it was just so hard to kiss that dream goodbye. “Oh Derek,” she sighed.
“Da,” Emily said from her lap.
And Holly peered down at her. “Da?” she repeated, her eyes widening. “Did you just say Da?”
Holly fought the tears forming in her eyes as another heartbreaking sigh escaped her. “Oh Em, I think he should be your daddy, too,” she told her little girl. “But he doesn’t. And I can’t have a man who doesn’t want to be your father just because I love him. And apparently, it doesn’t matter how much either of us love him, or even how much he might love us. It just isn’t going to work out.”
Holly sat battling a sense of loss and confusion, reminding herself that as much as the heart wants what the heart wants, the heart didn’t want what it didn’t want just as much. And that maybe it didn’t matter why Derek didn’t want to accept his feelings for her daughter—she simply had to respect it and move on.
After all, he’d done nothing wrong. And if he couldn’t be in this the way she wanted from him, maybe he was doing them a favor by not pretending.
She was startled from her thoughts when the doorbell rang—and she looked up to find Derek standing on the other side of the screen door.
When he saw that she was still crying a little, he let himself in. And he’d brought Claws, who he lowered to the floor. He felt nervous. He didn’t know why.
But wait—yes he did.
He had come back. And he’d come back for a reason.
“I called Mr. Nutter and let him have it,” he told her quietly. But that wasn’t the reason.
She nodded and he moved farther into the room, taking a seat next to her and Emily on the couch.
“Are you all right?” he asked. He didn’t like seeing her cry, especially if he was the cause of it.
She nodded again and said, “Just…you know…still a little upset.”
“Is Emmy okay?” Without planning, he reached instinctively to take her from Holly’s arms into his lap.
Holly sniffed and wiped her eyes. “Yes, she’s okay.” Then she reached up and touched his arm. “But you’re not,” she said. “You’re all scratched up.”
He shrugged—the scratches were no big deal. “I’ve weathered worse,” he said. “Claws, for instance.”
“Meow,” Claws said, leaping up next to them on the couch.
“I thought it might cheer Emmy up to see him,” Derek offered, thinking how silly it sounded, but how natural it had seemed, for some reason, to bring the cat over.
Holly smiled at him through her tear-reddened eyes and it warmed his heart. It was the first time he’d seen her smile in a while and it reassured him. And gave him courage. The courage he needed more in this moment than ever before.
“You doing okay, Emmy?” he asked, shifting his gaze to look into the baby’s eyes. And then he discovered that he’d missed those, too. A lot.
“I’ve been doing some thinking, Emmy,” he said. He glanced up at Holly, but then lowered his eyes back to Emily and took a deep breath. He had made a decision. He wasn’t gonna run anymore. And he was gonna quit fighting what he really wanted. He’d thought about Holly’s words out in the driveway before and he’d realized—he wanted to be leaned on. By them both. “I’ve been thinking…that me and you and your mom and Claws would make a pretty nice family.”
He heard Holly’s gasp next to him, but he went on, his eyes locked on the little girl’s. “I was thinking of asking your mommy to marry me,” he said, “but she’s been pretty mad at me lately, so I’m not sure she’d believe my heart’s in the right place. I’m not sure she’d believe me if I told her how much I’ve missed you both and how much it scared me to see you in danger. So what I’m thinking is—I just try to talk her into believing in me, into giving me a chance to prove I can be the man she needs me to be. We give it a little time so I can show her—and you, too—that I’m in this for the hard times, too. What do you think?”
“Daaaaaa,” Emily replied.
“Huh?”
“DaaaaDaaaa,” she said.
Derek couldn’t believe his ears. Or the warmth in his chest. He looked at Holly, amazed. “Did she say what I think she just said?”
Holly bit her lip and nodded. “Yes.”
Then they both looked back at the baby in Derek’s lap. He still couldn’t fathom it.
“DaDa,” Emily said again.
And suddenly, it all felt so right, so obvious. There were no more questions and no more fears. He was Emily’s DaDa, and she needed him, and he needed her. Not to mention that her mother was the woman he’d been waiting for all his life. Aunt Marie’s imagined advice had been true. He’d found the courage to follow his heart and trust his feelings and the world suddenly seemed perfect. If you’re gonna jump into the fire, do
it with both feet.
He turned to Holly, desperate to make sure he wasn’t the only one feeling this way. “What do you think?” he asked her. “About me and you, and Emily, and Claws?”
Tears had filled her eyes again and she tried to sniff them back. “I think we’d make a wonderful family,” she said. “But…Derek, are you sure?”
“Holly,” he began, sighing, “my life’s been empty without you. I want you and Emily. I want you to be able to lean on me. And I want to be able to lean on you, too. I want us to take care of each other, and to take care of Emmy, together. And like I said, I know I need to prove it—I need to show you. So that’s all I’m asking—that you let me show you this is what I really want.”
She sniffed again as her tears dissipated to be replaced with a beautiful smile. He returned the grin, and then he looked back to Emily. “And honey, I want you to be able to spend all the time with Emily that you want—so once I do show you, once you know you can be sure of me, you won’t need to work anymore if you don’t want to.”
Her eyes went wide as she lifted her hand to her chest. Had she heard him correctly? “I…I won’t?”
“I make plenty of money and nothing would make me happier than being able to provide for you and Em.”
“Really, Derek?” she asked, her heart filling with a whole new kind of joy.
“Really,” he replied with a smile.
Holly’s chest flooded with a deep warmth. It seemed too good to be true. But it was true. She could stay home with Emmy, watch her every move, see her every smile, just as she’d always longed to. And then at the end of the day, the man she loved would come home to them both and their world would be beyond perfect!
“I love you, Derek,” Holly breathed. Then she leaned over and nuzzled against him, content in knowing that she and Emily had found the man they were supposed to be with for the rest of their lives.
“Meow,” Claws said, easing his way in between them.
And the right cat, too.
Look for more classic Toni Blake reissues, including:
The Cinderella Scheme
The Bewitching Hour
And don’t miss any of these contemporary romance titles from Toni Blake:
The Coral Cove Series:
All I Want Is You
Love Me If You Dare
Take Me All The Way
The Destiny Series:
One Reckless Summer
Sugar Creek
Whisper Falls
Holly Lane
Willow Springs
Half Moon Hill
Other Titles:
Wildest Dreams
The Red Diary
Letters to a Secret Lover
Tempt Me Tonight
Swept Away
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Toni Blake's love of writing began when she won an essay contest in the fifth grade. Soon after, she penned her first novel, nineteen notebook pages long. Since then, Toni has become a RITA™-nominated author of more than twenty contemporary romance novels, her books have received the National Readers Choice Award and Bookseller's Best Award, and her work has been excerpted in Cosmo. Toni lives in the Midwest and enjoys traveling, crafts, and spending time outdoors. Learn more about Toni and her books at http://www.toniblake.com, or sign up for her newsletter and follow her on Facebook to get all the latest news and have a chance to win signed books and other prizes.