I nodded. He was really that comfortable with my critique? How often had anyone taken my words in the helpful manner they were offered instead of taking offense or sulking? I just barely stopped myself from glancing at Rusk again. Instead, I allowed Kjexx a slight smile. He really was quite good looking.
He leaned in closer, so close that I became very aware of how I could feel his heat against the skin of my cheek. His voice was so quiet that I had to strain my senses to hear him. Why did I feel such a thrill of sensation at his whisper? Why did the flash of his ice-chip colored eyes set my breath in my throat? Was it just that I felt a resonance with him?
“That’s why today, when we break camp they will go one way and we will sneak off another way. If anyone is tailing us they will follow the main force and we will fly away free.”
“I’m starting to like the way you think, Kjexx.”
“When we’ve journeyed a little longer, I think you’ll like more about me than just that.” Kjexx pulled back long enough to wink before leaning in close again.
“The others will leave in an hour with Taren leading them. He’ll tell the Black Talon of our plans later. We will hide in the trees over by the ridge with Graxx and Helixx and set out after they are clear. If anyone is watching from afar they’ll think we left with the main force.”
“The Eaglekin are large. Won’t they notice us if we ride them?”
Kjexx shrugged. “We’ll be careful. Without them, this journey could take all month.”
Rusk shifted from side to side in the snow. I knew he was dying to ask a question, but he was still too angry. Let him stew. He could be as angry as he wanted for all I cared. We could have left last night on Graxx and been free and clear of Kjexx.
“So,” I said, leaning back casually. “It will just be the three of us, then?”
Kjexx smiled and nodded. I fought the smile that tried to leap on my face. We hadn’t lost our last chance of escape! It would be two against one if he tried anything. That meant no blood spilled on the snow — not mine, at least. I could leave any time I wanted. I felt like I’d eaten a hot meal in front of a fire.
“We should go hide.” Kjexx poured the remains of his ta into the snow, scrubbing the mug with clean snow and then stowing it in his pack. He handed Rusk and I our own packs, but various bundles had been tied to them. “I’ve put the necessities in here. It’s not much, but it will get us to the Empire.”
And fully equipped! I hadn’t taken Kjexx for a fool, but I certainly wouldn’t complain!
We followed him to the ridge, hunkering down with the Eaglekin in the rocks and scrubby trees as the larger camp finished packing and loading their mounts.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you how you convince the Eaglekin to serve as mounts,” Rusk said to Kjexx. “They could crush you and snap your bones in an instant.”
My own mind drifted as I looked out over the snowy hills. Should I feel sorry that the main force, and most of our military power would soon be marching over the horizon, or should I be pleased that we might be able to slip out from Kjexx’s grasp. Did I even want to slip away? There was something about him that drew me. Maybe it was how he faced life with a look of wonder on his face and seemed to shrug off trouble like it was a light rain.
“Tylira.” I barely held back a yelp as I was yanked suddenly into Ra’shara by An’alepp.
She was crouched behind a tree, looking wildly from side to side.
“You’re looking worse for wear,” I said.
“No time. Listen. This place is breaking down. Falling apart. It’s like a rotting corpse.”
“What is?”
“Ra’shara on Axum. Keep up.” She pulled me down into her huddle. “It died ages ago and it begins to eat at the souls of all the people who can touch it in this world.”
I shivered, hands creeping up to wrap around my torso protectively. How did you keep something from eating your soul?
“You have to get off this planet as quickly as you can.”
“Well, that was the plan.”
An’alepp shuddered, her whole frame shaking violently. “Whatever you are planning on doing — expedite! We need an answer and we need to be gone. We don’t have weeks. The man with the golden tattoos hunts me.”
“Catane. Is he powerful here?”
“More than you could possibly imagine. Hurry. And don’t unweave. We can’t afford to be caught by him again.”
She shoved me and I stumbled back into the real world. So, what did we do now? Could we afford to keep trying to work with Kjexx when Catane hunted us and knew where we were? Should I try to force Rusk to help me slip away? Maybe he would, if he knew how dire things had become. I rubbed my arms. It was far too cold in this world and much too inhospitable.
“…it’s about mutual respect, really, and doing what you must to maintain the partnership.” Kjexx rummaged through his bag as he finished his answer to Rusk. Along the horizon behind him his men set out, their mounts forming a long line as the dawn faded into morning, outlining their departing silhouettes against the horizon.
Kjexx pulled a strange object out of his bag. It gleamed like it was made of glass, though it was about the size and shape of one of my fingers with a slender metal pin sticking out one end.
“Did you ancestors leave you any gifts, Tylira?”
“Some I could do without.” I couldn’t help that my heart sped up when he looked at me with so much focus. Was Rusk seeing this?
“This is a gift of my ancestors saved in a special place until now. Come close and you can see for yourself.” His blue eyes shone like the bright morning sky. Had I noticed how blue they were before? What would it be like to look in those eyes and see respect? To know that he could see my intelligence and competence? I’d like that. I felt a little buzz at the edges of my awareness as he drew closer, holding the artifact out where I could see it. “It will need contact with your skin to work. Roll up your sleeve.”
“What was it called?” I asked, as I exposed my arm. Would it make my skin tingle as much as his gaze already did?
“A syringe,” he said, as he flipped it deftly around in his fingers and then plunged the sharp needle point into my arm. He gripped my arm with his other hand, forcing me to hold still. My arm felt hot and prickly.
“Let her go!” Rusk yelled, but he was too late. My eyes blurred and my tongue felt thick.
“Pick her up and carry her to Helixx. The two of you can ride him today.” Kjexx shoved me to Rusk who caught me in his arms. I couldn’t move, not even to lift my lolling head.
“What have you done to her?” Rusk’s arms around me were the only safety I had left. Why had I wanted anything else? And how had Kjexx taken advantage of me this way? I hadn’t suspected a thing. I should have read something in his gaze or his words.
“It’s my guarantee of good behaviour now that my arms men are gone. She’s not a fool. She saw that you outnumber me now, and I doubt you’ll be able to talk her out of running like you did last night.”
“Draw your blade, pale man.” Rusk pushed me so I was held by just one of his arms while the other fumbled for his blade. My head lolled, out of my control, and I couldn’t focus my eyes.
“Don’t be a fool. If you fight me, you’ll never get the cure for what I’ve given her.”
“You’d poison your Windbearer?”
“It’s not poison if she gets the cure. She’ll be talking again in a few hours and walking by the end of the day. It won’t kill her for two more weeks. And not even then, if she gets the antidote.”
“You have this antidote?” Rusk’s muscles were tight against his skin. Was he planning to fight for the antidote right now, with me, a deadweight, on the end of the tether?
“Ha! Not with me. I, at least, came prepared for this journey. But if she complies, she’ll get it. We have a dozen vials of it in a secure location. And do you know what’s great about the drugs our ancestors made? They don’t go rancid or change with time. They’re still just as potent a
s ever. Don’t fear. Now mount up! We have miles to put between us and those who might follow.”
Chapter Fourteen: Standards
I BLINKED TWICE, AS my eyes came into focus. For the past two hours, they’d been drifting uncontrollably, as had my mind, but now everything was starting to sharpen again. I could almost feel control trickling back to my mind. A pox on Kjexx for treating me this way! I should teach him what it meant to cross Tylira Nyota. I should unweave his heart while it beat in his chest. I should… I should get a hold of myself.
I blinked again and swallowed. Were my muscles beginning to respond again? Where was I? White feathers under me and hints of black speckles on them. I was riding Helixx. Something was digging into my waist and both thighs. They must have tied me in. Trees flashed past. I swallowed again. How long had my mouth been dry.
We picked our way down a rocky hillside, Helixx leaning madly from one side to the next. A bead of sweat formed at my hairline and slowly slid down my face. A huge face loomed in front of my eyes. Pale. Glassy eyed. I gasped, the air catching in my throat, but still no sound came out. It took three more blinks to realize it was a huge statue in front of me, so lifelike that it appeared to be one of the pale habitants of this planet. Was that white marble they had carved it from? And what was this now? An Eaglekin carved perfectly from the same white stone. Were they carved directly into the mountainside? I’d never admit it to Kjexx, but it was possible that his world was as wondrous as my own. Who carved people into mountains?
How long had my throat been this dry and scratchy? My neck was gaining enough strength that I could keep my head from rolling side to side. Would I be able to speak soon? Even with the extra control of my neck I couldn’t make out the sun. Too many clouds.
“Rusk?” My voice was barely a whisper.
A warm weight shifted against my midsection. Was that his hand holding me in place? Was the warmth I felt against my back his body?
My mind drifted to happier times, sitting on my mother’s knee, chasing my sisters in the gardens, eating treats on feast day. I blinked twice. Swallowed. Oh, yes. I was still here.
“Rusk?”
“Wild Girl?” I felt warmth on my cheek and his breath gusted on my ear when he spoke. He must have his head lowered almost to my shoulder.
“Where—” I coughed.
“We’re headed towards Veen by an old route Kjexx knew. Are you in your right mind again?”
“Water.”
“Not yet. I don’t have a way to give it to you without drowning you until you get control of your muscles again.”
I drifted again. Perhaps I slept. I woke as we descended the hills onto a wide plain. Kjexx wavered blurrily before my eyes.
“I’ll scout ahead. Keep to the edge of the lake near the trees, but cross quickly and then follow the river that runs south. I want to watch our back trail after I scout. I don’t like thinking we are being followed.”
“Of course.”
“Don’t forget —”
“You don’t need to remind me.” Rusk’s voice sounded harsh. “I’ll do as you said so that she gets the antidote.”
Kjexx drifted away and my eyes lost focus and then focussed again. My hand twitched and I tightened it into a fist. It felt like I’d lifted an elephant with that tiny effort.
“Easy, girl. Don’t push too hard. Whatever he gave you was strong.”
“Is he gone?”
“For now.”
“He poisoned me!” It was hard to get enough passion into my words when I could barely get them out.
Rusk sighed. “I told you that when you gave your word to them you should take it seriously. Do you have a plan now that you know you can’t just slip away and sully your honor?”
“Are you really going to bring up honor again?” My head was killing me. At least I could speak, but my mouth felt terrible. What had that magical stick done to me?
“Tylira.” His words were gentle but sad. “I am all honor. I am honor from spine to skin. I gave my home up to fight for my people, my freedom up to fight for my family, and my future up to fight for you. There isn’t a shred of me left that hasn’t been dedicated to someone or something that I love more than myself. If you have no honor, you have nothing.”
“Are you saying that I’m nothing?” I wasn’t even sure he’d hear my words, they were so faint.
“You’ll be nothing if you don’t find something more than yourself to love.”
“I love you.”
“Do you, though?” He sounded weary. “I saw how you were looking at Kjexx. He’s like you. The two of you think the same way. That’s why he knew you’d try to overpower him. It’s why you don’t really want to hurt him, even though you want to better him. If I wasn’t chained to you, then you’d be falling for him…maybe you are already.”
“That’s silly.”
“Whatever it is you feel for me, you need something more than that to set your life by.”
“I’m trying to save our world — the world where everyone you’re honor-bound to lives.” My voice was growing stronger, but I fell into a coughing fit before I could finally spit the rest out. “Isn’t that enough for you?”
He handed me a water skin, gently taking my hand and helping it get a strong hold.
“Can you drink this? Do you have the strength to lift it yet?”
It was mostly empty. With shaky hands, I raised it and sipped the water, relishing the cool sensation as it eased the pain and dryness of my throat.
“I’m stronger than you think I am.”
“I don’t think that’s possible.” I could hear the smile in his voice. “It’s not your strength I doubt. But you use it only for your own ends — to find that freedom you are so desperate for. When will you learn that you were made for more than running away?”
“Well, what do you want for me, then?” My heart felt like it had been slapped. First, he throws Kjexx and my honor in my face. Now he wants me to give up on being free? “You want me to be a slave just like you?”
“You’re already a slave, Tylira. You’re a slave to your own desires. I want more for you than that.”
“What do you want me to do; save our world, or make everyone happy?”
“Why does it have to be either-or with you?”
“Because life is decisions, Rusk. You pick one and the other dies. Every single time. If I choose ‘honor’ and caring about everyone else, then it will be me who dies, little by little. I can care about you and me and that’s it. Or I can try to save one world — our world — and that’s it. Don’t ask me to be more than I am.”
We rode silently for a long time after that. Tears stung my eyes. It felt like he’d stabbed me right in the heart. He thought I was nothing. He thought I wasn’t worthy. I was just doing the best I could. What did he expect from me?
His hand stayed on my middle, supporting me as we rode. What sense did it make that he stuck by me when he thought I was so pathetic? And why did I care what he thought of me when he made it so clear that he’d never be pleased with who I was unless I changed? I wasn’t going to change.
Kjexx returned eventually, his Eaglekin stomping in the snow to keep warm. He lifted one of his eyebrows in a rapid lift-lift gesture towards me that would have seemed flirtatious if he hadn’t just injected me with poison several hours ago.
“I think we’ve shaken them off our trail. The ruse worked. I know another shortcut. If we hurry, we might see warm beds tonight. I’ll go scout ahead. Follow my tracks through the snow.”
Graxx must have been tired with all the constant coming and going, but he galloped off without protest. My muscles worked well enough now that I could almost keep my own balance. Physically, at least. Mentally, I felt completely off kilter.
I chewed my lip and tried to plan as Rusk squinted in the late afternoon light, trying to follow a trail in the snow. What could I do to fulfill my promises to An’alepp, to Rusk, to the Landers, to my own people? Could there possibly be a way to do all those
things? No matter which way I looked at the problem someone always lost out. Was it so bad that I didn’t want that someone to be me?
The hours wore on and daylight faded into dusk. Kjexx emerged from the shadows as dark approached, leading us to a tiny crevice in a seemingly impregnable line of cliffs. He took out a lantern, lit it, and led the Eaglekin slowly through the tiny cavern that served as a pass. It was narrow and dark, but the ceiling — if there was one — was too high for me to see. Rusk dismounted to help Helixx, but he left me tied in the saddles. There was no point protesting. My legs couldn’t hold me. With his body gone, the frigid air left me breathless, and soon the ends of my fingers and toes were fiery with pain and then completely numb.
The closeness of the walls made my skin creep. If one of the Eaglekin got stuck here would we be able to get out? What if it were Helixx and I was jammed in place on his back? I tried not to think about it. Spears of anxiety shot through my belly any time that I did.
“Tylira?” Rusk whispered to me. His voice was quiet enough that I didn’t think Kjexx could hear. “Don’t worry. The Eaglekin have been here before. It’s not long now.”
I breathed out through my mouth, allowing his words to calm me. Did he take this extra care for me merely out of duty? Because of his honor? The thought made my heart feel heavy. If he was only satisfying his honor, then he didn’t care for me any more than he cared for Kjexx.
When the Eaglekin finally stepped out on the other side, the sky was clear, a dome of bright stars so light that they looked like a smear of milk across the sky. We were in a bowl-like valley. Was that water I could hear trickling?
“Come on you laggers,” Kjexx said. “I almost think you like being out in the cold.”
What alternative was there? I was about to curse Kjexx for his teasing, when he held his lantern up and before us a large winter house stood in the dark. Great timbers held up the roof and walls, impressive in scale and designed low and wide, so that it hugged the valley floor mushroom-like as if it had grown there. Kjexx led us to the side where the Eaglekin could bed down in a shelter designed for them. He was busy using their braziers to light a fire in a pit at the center of the stables while Rusk untied me from my saddle and helped me down.
Lightning Strikes Twice (Unweaving Chronicles Book 2) Page 9