Taken By Ezra (The Lanphear Men Book 1)

by Caroline Peterka

  I pull away, and he leaves me standing there. Deep down I don’t want to leave him. I want to stay here, but I don’t want to ruin this with him. I don’t want to be a burden to Ezra like I am to Claudia. I want to be normal. I wish I could explain my fears to Ezra, but I have to see where this is leading first.

  * * * *

  “Holy shit!” Claudia says when she sees the large hickey on my neck the next day. Her green eyes are like saucers as she lifts my hair to see the other one is just as bad. “Did Ezra do that? What the fuck? Is he a vampire?”

  I had forgotten to leave my hair down when I woke up, deciding instead to put it in a ponytail. I had stayed up all night to keep the same sleeping schedule I usually had when I worked, but my hair was down then. I didn’t have time to tell her about having sex with Ezra, but I did mention that I spent the evening with him.

  “I know it’s bad,” I say.

  “Oh, my God, did you have sex with him here?” Her voice is shrill.

  “Uh…yes to sex, but it wasn’t here.” I pour myself a cup of coffee.

  “What?”

  I let out a deep sigh. I love Claudia, but she is too over the top sometimes. I feel like I’m telling a parent and not my best friend. I tell her more about my evening leading up to what happened when we went to his place. I even tell her about his brother walking in on us in the shower, her eyes bugging out more when I explain about the argument they had downstairs, and finally ending with him begging me to stay the night.

  “Why didn’t you stay?”

  “What if I had a nightmare? How am I supposed to explain the way I freak out when I wake up?”

  Claudia taps her chin with her finger. “I can’t believe you did that after I told you he has a reputation.”

  “I wanted to, Claud. I feel different with him. I want to be normal.”

  “You are normal.”

  “No, I’m not! How is having horrible nightmares being normal? I have to take meds so I don’t have them when I’m overtired. That is not normal.” My fists are balled up as I raise my voice at her. “I don’t want to ruin him like I did you. I don’t want him to pity me when I wake up screaming for help because some asshole thought it would be fun to rape a seventeen-year-old girl who was under the influence. It’s my fault that I got drunk with my attacker in the first place. I’m the reason my parents fell apart. I don’t want Ezra to see the weak me!”

  Claudia has tears streaming down her cheeks when she rushes over to me, putting her arms around me, her voice softer as I begin to cry. “I’m sorry, Lanee. But it isn’t your fault. What happened was terrible and could have happened to anyone. I would have nightmares too, but I don’t think he will pity you. What happened with your parents isn’t your fault either. They didn’t know how to deal with the trauma you went through. And you didn’t ruin me with the truth. Best friends are forever. I’m glad you told me, but you are not a burden to me. I love you like a real-life sister. I don’t stay with you because I have to. I stay because I love you and you’re my family. I want to protect you like my own.”

  I sniffle, pulling back partway in her arms. “I don’t want to be broken, Claudia. I hurt inside.”

  Her chin wobbles, tears flowing. “I know. I’m here when it happens.”

  “I really like Ezra, but I’m scared I will make a mistake.” I blow out a breath. “He didn’t pressure me into it last night. I really wanted to do it. It was amazing, but I know you said he sleeps around. I’m not sure I can take that.”

  “I know we’ll figure it out together. We’re family, Lanee. We stick together.” She smiles at me through tears, and I hug her tightly.

  I didn’t mean to get all emotional on her, but I had to get my thoughts all out. I needed her to understand I didn’t want to hold her back with my flaws. I want her to live a full life. I may live vicariously through her at times, but I want to start living too. I want to put myself out there. I want to learn to live like a normal person.

  And…I want that with Ezra.

  But I fear making a mistake with him. I don’t want to be like those other girls he uses and tosses aside. I know I’ve just met him, but I want a relationship with him. I want to know everything about Ezra. I like what I’ve seen so far. I enjoyed having sex with him. I don’t want to be wrong about him.

  Could he like a person like me who carries heavy emotional baggage?

  Chapter Eleven

  Stay

  It’s an hour after my meltdown and Ezra texts me. Hey beautiful. Are you awake?

  Yes I am.

  Can I see you?

  I’m at the beach with Claudia.

  Okay. See you in 10.

  “What is that shit-eating grin about?” Claudia asks me.

  “Ezra just texted,” I say, lying down again. I had gotten up to look in my beach bag when I heard my phone chime. “He’s going to meet us here.”

  “Hmm…lover boy must like what you gave him last night,” she says, waggling her brows over her sunglasses.

  “Oh my God, Claudia, stop, please,” I say, covering my face with my hands.

  She has been teasing me for the last hour, not bad teasing but making sexual comments since our little emotional breakdown an hour ago. “I’m glad he contacted you though. Otherwise I would have had to find him and kill him,” she says, deadpan.

  I laugh. “The scary part is I know you would do it too, without a second thought.”

  “I would.” She beams.

  I shake my head at her, laughing as I glance up to see all the kids running around playing in the sand or water. I’m glad we got up early to come to the beach. This summer has been really hot, and we’ve been spending most days out here when we don’t have to work. It’s great to go swimming when the heat gets too bad, and it looks like most of the people in Crestview are taking advantage of the hot summer day here.

  “Hello, beautiful ladies,” Ezra calls to us a few minutes later.

  I turn to see him smiling, my breath freezing in my lungs at him shirtless with his muscles and tattoos on display, orange shorts slung low on his hips to show the small amount of dark hair he has below his belly button. It looks like he just stepped off a model set. The only flaw on his perfect skin is the area where the stitches are from being stabbed. Otherwise, the man is extremely gorgeous.

  “Hi,” I say, breathy, while Claudia chimes in with her words of wisdom.

  “Hey, Dracula, try not to suck all her blood next time.”

  My face flames when he chuckles, sitting close to me on the towel, his hand moving the braid from my hair to see the ugly mark he gave me from last night. I swear I could die right here at Claudia’s Dracula remark.

  “I got carried away. Sorry about that,” he says, bringing his lips to my neck for a light kiss. I shiver, closing my eyes briefly at his touch, feeling his warm breath when he speaks in a low voice. “I didn’t hear you complaining last night when I was doing it.”

  “I liked it,” I reply softly, warmth rushing through me. It feels like my body is on fire when he kisses my neck gently again.

  “Okay, okay, don’t get all mushy now.” Claudia is laughing as I glance at her. My face is hot, and it isn’t from the sun. This is new to me, the touching, kissing, and attention I’m receiving from Ezra. I’ve never had this, not even in high school. I stuck to homework or hung out with Claudia, but this feels great.

  “I’ll try to behave.” Ezra winks at her, and she snorts.

  “We’ll see,” she mutters, but she isn’t angry. In fact, my friend is looking at me happily, and it makes my heart sing. Her smile is wider than I’ve seen before.

  “Do you work tonight?” Ezra asks me, his arm around my waist.

  “No, I have the next few days off.” I smile, trying to control the pounding of my heart when I look at him.

  “How about you stay with me tonight?” His icy-blue eyes plead with me as I bite my lip in hesitation. He doesn’t look tense, and I know Claudia is watching me carefully to gauge my response to
him. He cups my jaw gently, rubbing his thumb in slow circles on my cheek. “I promise Levi won’t interrupt us again. I already told him and Azriel you were coming over,” he tells me.

  “I…um…” Damn. This shouldn’t be hard. I know normal couples stay the night all the time, but I’m not normal. I could take a sleeping pill, but I don’t like the drowsy feeling I get at times. I don’t want to have a nightmare, and though I sleep decently with the pills, there is always a small chance it will happen. I can’t explain to him why if I wake up like that. I refuse to tell him about that part of my life yet.

  “Seriously. I can’t believe your brother interrupted you!” Claudia intervenes, sensing my nervousness when I haven’t answered yet.

  “Yes.”

  I answer at the same time he says, “She didn’t tell you yet?”

  “I didn’t fill her in, Ezra.”

  “I was too busy teasing her about the hickeys you left all over her.” Claudia laughs.

  Ezra groans, pulling me closer into his body, and I melt into him. “It was embarrassing,” he says.

  “I’ll bet.” Claudia is laughing harder with him while the whole time my face feels like it is on fire as I remember the Levi incident. She cackles a moment longer, and then her gaze finds mine. “We were planning on going to your club tonight. Do you think we could get some complimentary drinks for knowing the boss?”

  “Claudia,” I say.

  Ezra laughs and I elbow him. “I could do that,” he replies, kissing the top of my head.

  “You don’t have to. My cheapskate friend can buy drinks for herself,” I say, narrowing my eyes at her. I know she is just trying to keep the subject off me staying the night, but she has a wicked way of doing it.

  “I don’t mind. I would love to have you two there, especially you, babe,” he says, his warm breath tickling my earlobe.

  “I love your club, but why is it called Number Six?” Claudia continues on, her eyes zeroing on the way Ezra is holding my hand, his fingers interlaced with mine.

  “Well, there are six of us boys, and I always thought six was lucky, so I called it Number Six,” he tells us.

  The three of us fall into healthy chat for the rest of the afternoon until Ezra’s phone beeps and he has to leave. He doesn’t say much after the message, but the sad look on his face says whoever texted upset him. He gives me a brief kiss on the lips and leaves quickly as though it is an emergency he needed to take care of. Claudia and I go home shortly afterwards, preparing dinner and taking showers to remove the excess sunscreen we used. It is strange but wonderful how the day turned out after we woke up. The way Ezra and Claudia interacted was fun, both making jokes about something, but overall it was great to be with the two of them.

  * * * *

  Ezra kept true to his word about giving us free drinks. They kept coming any time our glasses would get low, but I began to worry we were taking advantage of him. He met us at the entrance of the club and introduced us to some of his staff, telling them we were his honorary guests tonight and that we were not to be charged. He was with us for ten minutes before he was pulled away for some business thing, but that was hours ago.

  Claudia and I drank and danced. Well, she drank and danced, and I just watched. She was having a blast, and that was all I cared about at first, but then she started to get drunker. Her body swayed with the music. Finally I had to pull her off to the bar to drink water. Ezra was busy, and I was getting worried I was not going to see him at all tonight now that he was at work.

  “I love you, Lanee,” Claudia slurs, her arm coming around my shoulder heavily. She can barely hold herself up, and with her being so tall, I’m struggling to help her.

  “Need some help.”

  A hand reaches out, and I prepare to snap at the owner, but the familiar tattooed sleeves are a huge relief.

  “Yes, Azriel, it seems my lush friend has had too much,” I say when he takes most of her weight off of me.

  Claudia giggles like a loon when she sees him. “Hey, sexy tattoo man,” she purrs.

  Azriel laughs. “Hey yourself, woman.”

  “What are you doing here?” I ask as he helps me with my friend to the front of the club.

  “Just visiting my delinquent brother,” he tells me with a shrug.

  Ah, yes, the man that I am still waiting to show back up, who has been MIA for hours now. I know he is here to work, but I kind of miss him. I’ve had to keep an eye on Claudia for some time, so I didn’t have a lot of time to wonder where he is, but it would be nice to see him before we left.

  “Is he in the office?” I ask, pushing my way through a small crowd with Azriel.

  “I didn’t see him in there, but Carter said he would be back. I guess there was some kind of commotion, and Ezra had to take care of an employee.” My heart drops that he isn’t even in the building. I check my phone, but there are no messages from him. “Levi told me you were at the house the other day.”

  “Uh, yeah.” I point out Claudia’s little car to Azriel, and the two of us carry her to the passenger’s side. I open the door and he carefully places her in the seat, buckling her in as she smiles at him through drunken eyes. I could almost laugh at the way she is ogling him. I know she is attracted to the man, but Azriel isn’t her usual type. She usually goes for pretty boys with high-paying jobs, men who dress like they walked out of a fashion store and who are complete assholes. It would be nice to see her with someone like Azriel for a change. From what I’ve heard he is a decent guy who started his tattoo business after college, majoring in art and business, choosing to do what he loved and inking skin for people.

  “Are you two going to be okay?” Azriel asks me, his eyes full of concern as he stares at my now sound-asleep roommate.

  “I think so. I didn’t drink as much as her.” I open the car door, glancing at the club, and I’m sad that I won’t get to see Ezra.

  “Are you still coming over to the house tonight? Ez mentioned we were to be scarce,” Azriel hesitates, his hands shoved into his pockets.

  “No, Azriel. If you see Ezra tell him I needed to take care of Claudia.” I sigh heavily because a small part of me does want to go and see his brother, but my friend needs me. I don’t want anything to happen to her in this state. She is the only person I have left in this world who truly cares for me, and it would kill me if something happened to her. “Thanks for your help, but I gotta get her home.”

  “Drive safe, Lanee,” Azriel calls out, backing away from the car.

  I wave at him once we are on our way, noticing that he watches us until we are far enough away, and then I see him take out his phone. I glance at my sleeping friend and smile, thinking about the ways I will tease her tomorrow about this. The two of us drink together often, but I’ve never seen her so drunk. At one point she was slamming down the shots like they were going out of style. I’ll ask her what that was all about tomorrow when she is sober and hungover.

  The drive home doesn’t take long, and thankfully she is more helpful when it is time to go into the apartment. She is slurring more, but just as jovial as before. I help her strip down and get into bed. I move a trash can next to the top of the bed and retrieve water and aspirin for her when she wakes up later. She is sound asleep within minutes, so I go to my room and change out of my club clothes.

  I throw on a thin white cami with powder-blue short-shorts. It feels good to be home away from the noise and relaxing for a change. I pull my hair up and wash the makeup from my face and then I hear my phone chirp with an incoming message. I know it has to be Ezra. Other than Claudia, who is inebriated and passed out in bed, he’s the only person who would be texting me at two in the morning. I finish in the bathroom and go to check out the phone, wondering if I should even look to see what it says or just go to bed. I think part of me is a little disappointed I didn’t get to see him this evening when we were in the club, but the other part knows that is his job. I decide I need to see what his message says, so I pick up the phone and read it. My he
art leaps.

  I wish you would have stayed.

  Claudia was really, really drunk. I had to go.

  Can you come over?

  No. I need to keep an eye on her.

  I wait for almost twenty minutes for him to respond to me. The whole time my heart is pounding like a jackhammer, and I’m wondering what is taking him so long to respond. I get my answer when there is a light knock on the glass doors of the patio. My face breaks out into a wide grin, and I drop the phone on the counter so I can open the doors for him. I yank it open and find him casually leaning against the door, his sexy smile beautifully placed on his plump lips, and his arms outstretched on the frame.

  “Hey, beautiful girl,” he practically purrs at me.

  I don’t know what has come over me lately, but I rush into his arms quickly. I sigh happily when he holds me tightly to his body, and the two of us stand there in the night just holding each other in silence. I did miss him tonight, but I just want to be in his big arms.

  “Did you miss me as much as I missed you?” he whispers, lowering his mouth to my ear. I nod slowly. “I’m sorry about leaving you two alone all night. I had a rough night with one of my employees who showed up after opening.”

  “I don’t care. You’re here now,” I say, pulling back, taking his hand and leading him into the apartment. I feel so happy I could scream. I was sure that I wouldn’t see him again tonight, but here he is. I lock the door once we’re both inside, and lead him through the small apartment, shutting off the lights as we go.

  Now that he is here I don’t want him to go. I want him to stay with me tonight. I am feeling brave since I met him, and I want to try this overnight thing with him. I feel safe. I want to believe in taking chances the way Claudia urges me to do. I’m going to do exactly that tonight.

  I am going to prove to myself I’m not too broken to be in a normal relationship. There is too much I like about Ezra to let my fears stop me completely from living. He makes me feel fixed when I am with him. I have to believe that the nightmares won’t be here with how safe he makes me feel.