Bound Beneath His Pain: A Dirty Little Secrets Novel

by Stacey Kennedy

  I’m not sure when I return to the present. I only know his lips on mine, gently bringing me back from where he sent me. His mouth begins to travel to places no one had ever cared about before. He’s claiming every inch of my flesh; my shoulder, my breasts and nipples, my hip, my stomach; his openmouthed kisses blaze fire across me, and he doesn’t stop kissing me until I’m fully aware again.

  My fingers are aching to touch him when he picks me up in his arms. I want to draw his cock in between my lips. I want to taste him on my tongue like he tasted me. But his eye contact is firm as he lays me out on the bed, declaring that’s not my choice tonight.

  He wants me.

  And now he’ll take me.

  He looks away when he moves to the nightstand, taking a condom from the drawer. I can’t stop watching him, while he’s opening his belt and then the buttons of his slacks. When he shoves his pants down and they fall at his ankles, I shamelessly stare at his thick cock with veins protruding on the sides.

  God, he’s big.

  I lick my lips, watching him rip the condom wrapper open then sheathe his erection, teasing me with the way his hand strokes over his hardened flesh. I scan his body, which is sculpted enough to make me feel feminine and protected, yet not enough to overwhelm me. My mouth becomes moist, and I swallow the increased saliva as I lift my eyes to his. My breath quickens; Micah is a lot of man to absorb.

  He suddenly pauses at whatever he sees on my face. “Never be afraid of me.”

  “I’m not scared,” I admit, breathlessly, closing my hands, stopping the tremble. “I’m nervous. I haven’t done this in a while.” And I’ve never been with a man like you, I leave unsaid between us.

  His smile slowly builds. “Ah, love, the way I feel right now should make you a little nervous.” He returns to me, his stride is so Micah—confident, not in a hurry, determination oozing from him. A shift happens near my heart, a pang of sorts, when all that man crawls his way to me on the bed. The soft strands of his hair fall free of the gel, while he slides his warm, hard body over mine. “You’ve made me wait,” he adds, hovering above me, his voice a low rumble, “and that is never a good thing.” His lips seal with mine and he steals the kisses right out of my mouth. Heat is flooding my body as his hand is sliding over my hip bone, squeezing me there, before traveling down my thigh, where he drapes my leg across his hip.

  I’m moaning against his mouth when he grinds his condom-covered cock between my thighs, perfectly connecting with my clit, drawing pleasure from my swollen, aroused bud. He feels like a dream come true. His touch is like a fantasy. I part my mouth to moan against the pleasure of being pinned by his body and he plunges his tongue in deep.

  I can’t take anymore. I ache so much it hurts. I want him like a craving that’s soul deep. It’s all him. It’s not just the kiss, nor is it the feeling of his cock, it’s having him on top of me. It’s not enough. I need all of him. I’m wiggling against him and lifting my hips, begging him to enter me.

  His low groan flutters in my belly as he leans away, staring at me with eyes so hot and wicked they could melt ice. “Goddamn it,” he growls, flipping me over onto my stomach. The hairs raise on my arms and nape when he gathers my wrists, pinning both hands above my head with one of his. He straddles my thighs, pushing my legs together. He squeezes both my ass cheeks before giving one a hard slap. I’m squealing from the confusing likable heat on my bottom when his condom-covered cock is at my slit and I gasp loudly as he enters me from behind in one swift stroke.

  So big. So hard.

  My hands ball into fists, as he pushes against my back, pinning me to the bed and stretching me completely for his pleasure. He shifts his hips slowly, allowing my slick heat to accept him before he unleashes all that power onto me. That’s when I realize my body no longer belongs to me.

  It’s his to take what he wants.

  And I want to give him it all, because he’s given to me, too.

  I’m learning about a pleasure that’s foreign to me, screaming into the duvet. Every pound of his thrusts against me, each slide of his spectacular cock, has me arching up into him. I want to look at him—am desperate to, in fact—to see what he looks like when he takes me, but I can’t move. That’s when I know that pleasure isn’t mine to command, but mine to be given. I don’t take from Micah. He gives to me. My eyes roll back in my head, and I realize I like his aggressiveness.

  It’s dominating.

  It’s powerful.

  It’s everything.

  The scent of our sex rushes through my nostrils, slaps of skin against skin echo in my ears. His rough hands taking me how he wants without apologies, and the way he owns my body without any regret, gives me everything I hadn’t known I’d been missing. His thick cock is filling me deeply, pumping in and out, and the sheer force of his pelvis smacking against my ass is silencing my mind and awakening nerve endings never before awakened.

  My moans are now one long sound and sweat is coating my skin. I cannot move. I can’t think. I don’t know how to free myself from the pressure building inside of me. It’s all overwhelming me and I’m spiraling out of control…

  I suddenly feel the weight of his body on mine; his low voice right by my ear, tickling my neck. “Do you want to come, Allie?”

  “Yes!” I pant. “Please!”

  “Give it to me,” he murmurs in a voice I’m sure could make me orgasm alone. It’s low. It’s slow. It’s his.

  Then the weight of his body is gone and he squeezes my ass so tight and then slaps my cheeks twice, bringing heat to my lower body. The burn on my flesh as his fingers grip my skin, matched with his cock driving unforgivingly into me delivers me into euphoria without any sort of warning and I’m squeezing him tight, rolling through wave after wave of pleasure.

  His thrusts become frantic, hard, fast pounds against me. His low, gravelly moans keep me riding the high I hope to never return from, when I feel the sting on my shoulder, the teeth scraping against my flesh.

  “Fuck!” I scream, my toes pointing, as he sends me soaring higher while he’s bucking and jerking against me.

  Sometime later, I come to realize he’s lying on my back; his sweaty skin plastered to mine; his chest heaving up and down against me. He releases my wrists and flips me over, settling between my legs. I make no move to help him. I can’t. I’m boneless.

  He swipes the hair off my face. Dark, sexy, smoky eyes meet mine. “Did that make you forget?”

  I manage to force my mind back into coherent thinking. “Forget?”

  He drops both hands beside my head, hovering over me, and his brow curves arrogantly. “Forget any remaining objections you had about me?”

  I laugh softly, breathless. “Hell yes.”

  “Good.” He lowers his head into my neck.

  We’re both catching our breaths, while he reaches up to my wrists and begins rubbing them. I realize in those quiet seconds after an orgasm that Micah offers unimaginable pleasure.

  Addictive pleasure.

  And I want more.

  Chapter 9

  Allie

  The following morning, loud beeping pierces the silence. My hand moves to the end table, where the noise is coming from, and smacks against the snooze button on the clock to make it go away. I pull the duvet up over my shoulder, wanting to ignore the sun beaming on my face.

  Frustratingly, a minute later, the beeping begins again, reminding me that I hadn’t set the clock, which also reminds me that I’m not alone in the bed, and Micah likely set the clock before falling asleep. Considering we had sex more times last night than I’ve had in the last year, I forgive myself for not recalling him setting the alarm. But I’m sure glad he thought to, or I would be late this morning.

  Real estate agents work Saturdays, and that’s nonnegotiable.

  Wide awake now and thinking of all the crap I have to do, including finding the Lowes as many possibilities as I can by Monday, I blink away the sleepy haze, feeling the strains of my body from the most amazing se
xual experience of my life. Every muscle aches, including parts of my body that feel a little bruised from Micah’s roughness, as well as the junction between my thighs, but I enjoy these particular aches. Which now reminds me that I’m very naked and maybe being late for work to get more of Micah wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

  I flip over to face him, finding an empty bed next to me. Coldness sweeps across me so fast, stealing my breath, I jerk up to sitting. I pull the cream-colored duvet with me, knowing that he’d been there. I remember falling asleep in his arms, and the sheets beside me are messy and the pillow looks slept on. “Micah,” I call out.

  When I hear footsteps coming from the living room, I sigh in relief, glad to know he hadn’t left me. I reach up, flattening out my hair and wiping under my eyes, removing any leftover makeup, when a feminine Spanish voice says, “I’m sorry…” The maid, wearing the hotel’s uniform of all black with a Phoenix’s logo on the right arm, enters the bedroom. “Mr. Holt had an early morning meeting and asked me to make sure you got these.”

  She can’t even look at me when she places a pin-striped pantsuit on the bed. I refuse to look at her either, wishing to be anywhere but here. “Please take your time,” she eventually adds, staring at her shoes. “I brought some makeup and everything else you need to start your day.” She turns on her heels, moving toward the door. “Mr. Holt ordered breakfast for you, it’s on the balcony when you’re ready.”

  I part my lips to say something to defend myself, but only a bitter taste fills my mouth. Because the worst thing about all this is that I can’t even say waking up to the maid instead of Micah surprises me. This is what happens when you date a billionaire. Work always comes first. I will always come second. And I guess maybe a part of me believed—hoped—this would not happen, especially this morning.

  But it did…

  He left me.

  The bedroom door clicks shut and I glance up, seeing the maid’s gone. I shove off the duvet, my skin crawling. I can only imagine some women would love this treatment; new clothes, pampered by the maid, room service. But it’s not what I want. It’s so far from what I want.

  I want him.

  And he’s gone.

  I ignore the pantsuit on the bed and gather my clothes from last night off the floor. My stomach is rolling while I hastily dress. I find my clutch and shawl on the dresser and my shoes by the end of the bed, and I put them on, awkwardly walking toward the door as I do, not looking around to see if any other hotel employees are in the suite.

  Every step through the living room, and then down the hallway, and even when I enter the elevator, becomes harder to take. I’m repeating my mother’s mistakes, and that’s something I said I would never do. Dammit, I knew not to let this happen. But Micah had me believing he was someone different.

  I can only imagine this is how it all begins. First, an empty bed in the morning. Next, personal presents bought by Neil, instead of Micah. My skin slicks with a cold sweat, knowing this isn’t the life I want.

  I want a man to be there when I wake up in the morning, to hold me, hug me, kiss me. I want him to roll over and make me his, ensuring I think about him all day. I want it to be us first, before everyone steals his attention from me.

  Anger at myself is making me queasy. How could I let this happen? Stupid, Allie, stupid! Hypersensitive to the loud chatter and people in the lobby, I exit the elevator. The door to the outside seems so far away, while I wrap my arms around myself, hurrying to get there. The bellboy holds the door open for me and then I’m finally outside, gulping the air.

  “Allie, are you okay?”

  I glance sideways, finding Levi standing by the Bentley. Unable to fill my lungs completely, I nod.

  His mouth downturns. “Micah asked me to make sure you got to Holt this morning.” He opens the passenger door. “Please let me drive you home to—” His gaze rakes over me, and I can only imagine my hair is messy and my makeup is running. “Let me take you home first before I deliver you to Holt.”

  Coldness is not only touching my skin now; it’s flushing through my entire shaking body and my stomach is churning. “I think I’ll grab a cab. Thank you anyway, Levi.” I want absolutely nothing to do with Micah right now is what I leave unsaid between us.

  Before Levi can stop me, I spin on my heels and jog in the opposite direction, stopping at the curb and hailing a cab.

  When one squeals to a stop for me, I don’t look back when I get inside. Nor do I look out the window at Levi when the driver speeds off. Instead, I let the tears fall, not caring one bit that the taxi driver watchs me in the rearview mirror.

  Micah

  Allie refused the drive this morning and took a cab instead. A word of warning: she seemed upset.

  I frown at Levi’s text, shutting my eyes at the warning, drawing myself away from my office and into the silence of my mind. There’s this heavy feeling in my chest that I don’t like. A feeling that I don’t understand. I leave women in the morning. It’s what I do. That’s me. I don’t do sweet relationships. I don’t do love. I give what I can, and what I gave to Allie last night is all that I can offer her. My lungs tighten, strangling the air I’m breathing, when someone clearing their throat draws my attention.

  “Sorry I’m late,” fellow DC member Darius says, entering my office, a harsh scowl on his unshaven face. “My plane was delayed and I touched down only an hour ago.”

  “It’s all right. Thank you for coming to see me on the weekend.” I push all emotion aside and move around my glass desk. Richardson still needs to be dealt with, and while my team wants nothing to do with the project, I need to start moving ahead. I greet Darius with a strong handshake and then tap the back of the leather wingback chair. “Please take a seat.” I return behind my desk, taking a quick look at the glass wall on the left side of my office.

  In the meeting room adjacent to my office, Allie sits with her back to me, alongside Isabella, and more than a dozen employees, for what I assume is their weekly town hall meeting. Allie shifts in her seat while taking notes, hinting that she knows I’m watching her now. I notice her slumped shoulders with disapproval before I glance away, dropping down into my chair. “I called you here—”

  “What’s this?” The surprise in Darius’s voice has me looking up at him; he’s staring into the meeting room. He finally swings his head toward me, eyes wide. “When did my sister start working for you?”

  “Your sister?”

  “Allison Parker. She’s the brunette there.” Darius points to my Allie, who’s now angled in her seat, showing off the side of her face while she’s addressing the group.

  Ice cuts through my veins, lowering my voice. “Allie is your sister?”

  “Well, to be more specific, she’s my half-sister,” Darius says with a small smile. “We share the same mother.”

  I slowly lower to my seat. “She never told me that.” And she should have, then I wouldn’t be in the middle of the most epic fuckup ever.

  Darius snorts a laugh, taking a seat in front of me. “I’m not surprised that Allison kept that bit of information to herself. She always preferred to stand on her own two feet. The last thing she wants is a handout from me.” He glances at her again through the glass, his eyes softening. “If she didn’t mention it to you, keep this between us. She doesn’t like me interfering in her career. If anything good happens to her here, I don’t want her to feel that I had any part in it.”

  “Of course,” I reply, shell-shocked.

  A minute ago, Allie had my head spinning.

  Now my mind shatters.

  I reach for the glass of water next to my keyboard and my heart is thundering in my chest. With two gulps of water, I hastily squash the emotion threatening to break through my poker face, and contemplate quickly how to deal with this.

  On one hand, I should tell Darius what happened between Allie and me. We’re close friends and we’ve taken an oath of loyalty to each other as members of the Dominants’ Council all those years ago. But thi
nking of the DC also reminds me that we keep our personal lives out of our obligations, and that’s why I never knew Darius had a half-sister. He never once spoke of her.

  On the other hand, I owe loyalty to the woman I slept with last night not to tell her half-brother personal details about her life.

  So, then, who do I betray?

  Darius interjects before I can decide, “How long has she been working for you?”

  “Not long.” I place the glass by my keyboard, shutting down personal thoughts until I can figure them out later. “This is actually the reason I called you here today. I bought Richardson last week. I thought you might be interested in giving the company a deeper look before we move ahead to see what we can do to grow it.”

  “Sounds like a challenge, and you know how I love those finicky projects.” Darius settles into his seat, narrowing his eyes into focus. “I’ll get my team on it. We’ll see if there’s an untapped piece of the market that Richardson could fit into to make it stand out. Perhaps we can find a way to bring something fresh to them.” He waits for my nod of agreement and then asks, “When do you want us to start?”

  “Right away, if possible.”

  “I’ll send a team over there on Monday.”

  “Excellent,” I reply, forcing myself to keep looking at him, and not allow my attention to drift to the other room to where it wants to go. “I have some ideas myself, but I’ll let you do your thing before I add my thoughts.”

  “I’ll tell the team.” Darius rises from his seat, as do I. “Anything else?”

  “No.” I follow him, moving around my desk. “I want the bigger picture before making any final decisions on the direction of the company.”

  Darius nods. “Makes sense.”

  We don’t need to say much more on the matter. We’ve grown several businesses together, and I know new ideas will be put forth, and we’ll have a solid budget by the time Bennett Inc. leaves Richardson. And right now that’s what I need.