Switching Lanes

by Porter, Renea

  “God, could he be any more obvious. The guy is in love with you whether you want to believe it or not. Even I know that look,” Alexis says sliding behind the wheel.

  “Really?” I ask sarcastically. What would she know?

  “I do watch movies and read books, so you know,” she says as if reading my thoughts. “I’m not completely dense,” she adds.

  “Seriously, I don’t want to think about it, not right now.”

  Shit, by that look he gave, it would make any woman drop her panties on the spot, right there in the restaurant. No shame.

  I try to shake Layne from being in my head and we pull into Home Goods. Inside, I grab a cart and we start piling in lamps, shelves, and kitchen stuff. I order a bed to have delivered in a few days along with a decent dresser I can actually store my clothes in without being overstuffed.

  We manage to make it out of the store with some good stuff and things that will hold us over for now. “I can’t believe we made it out there without buying the whole store. I love that place,” Alexis says as we fill her trunk.

  “I know, right.”

  We head to the apartment and we sort everything out. I place our dishes in the cupboard after I wash them. Alexis hangs some of the shelves and places a little table by the door. We spend most of the evening setting the apartment up.

  “I have a couch in storage it’s comfortable but I can’t load it in my SUV.”

  “I happen to know someone with a truck.” I smirk at the thought of Cole.

  “You’re not going to give up, are you?”

  I shake my head no with a smile plastered across my face. “You know you like him,” I torment her.

  “Whatever, he has a truck. See if he is available over the weekend,” she tells me with a hand on her hip.

  I grab my phone from my purse and Alexis stands beside me in anticipation. I find Cole’s number and send him a text.

  Hey, it’s Renee. Alexis and I found an apartment right off campus. Are you available to help us move next weekend?

  We wait all of thirty seconds before the phone buzzes. I’ll be available. Just text me when and where and I’ll be there. I’ll even bring coffee.

  Alexis and I both smile at Cole’s gesture. “See? He is a good guy,” I tell her. I text back our address and the time to be there.

  “I never said he wasn’t. I’ve never been with a guy, besides, you know.” Her eyes focus on the tile of the kitchen floor.

  “I’m not saying jump in bed with him. If he says something to you, just take things slow. See where it goes. What could it hurt?” I ask her.

  She shrugs her shoulders, and clams up. “You make it sound so easy.”

  “I never said it would be easy; trust me, I know from experience. I haven’t found a guy yet that makes me forget about the past when I’m with him. It’s hard living the lives we live and the torment that follows. But we have to try.” I don’t know if I’m trying to convince her or myself.

  Chapter Seventeen

  School is back in full swing, and it’s been several days since I last talked to or seen Layne. My heart feels like it is still broken in half and I’m not sure if it will get pieced back together or not. I think when he broke my heart he took the other half with him. He probably doesn’t even know he took it with him. How can someone survive with half a heart?

  As the days come and go, the thought of Layne out of my life for good, is not making any sense. He makes me happy, even if we are only friends. Maybe I’ll never fill that void that I feel when I’m with him. I just don’t know how we can go back to the way it was before.

  It’s finally Friday and I walk to my last class in a daze, as I have all week. I’ve come to the realization that I at least owe it to myself to hear Layne out. And if I’m not happy with how it goes, I can cut ties. But I do owe myself this one thing.

  My bed was delivered to the apartment and I’m finally going to be sleeping in it tonight. Cole is all set for helping get the couch to the apartment tonight.

  After class, I head over to the new apartment, ecstatic that I don’t have to live in a dorm any longer. This will be the first night in the new place. Since Alexis was too chicken to do it, I had to ask Cole if he could pick up the couch at the storage location Alexis had it stored at. And he said he would. I get to the apartment and find Alexis sitting on a stool in the kitchen.

  “Welcome home,” she says enthusiastically.

  “I’m so glad to have a place off campus. Isn’t Cole back yet?” I ask while looking around.

  “No, not yet. You need to be prepared for who might walk through that door,” Alexis says in a fast tone.

  “What do you mean? What are you talking about?”

  “I mean, you might be facing Layne sooner than you thought. You two need to work this out before it’s too late,” she says.

  “I can’t even be mad at you.”

  I walk out of the room, and go brush my hair and my teeth real quick and I freshen up my makeup. Once I’m satisfied with the look, I make my way back out into the kitchen and join Alexis by sitting on the stool next to her.

  My phone buzzes. We’re here. What floor you on?

  My stomach drops.

  Come up to the second floor, apartment four. We’ll have the door open, so you can come on in.

  My heart begins to pound forcefully against my ribcage. I try to calm myself by taking a deep breath, but I don’t think it’s working. I hear the commotion outside in the hall as they come up the stairs.

  “I’ll order some pizza. Got to give them some sort of payment,” Alexis says, grabbing her phone.

  I shake my head, because I know neither Cole nor Layne would expect any sort of payment. They come in with each end of the couch in their hands. Layne nods at me and I point to where the couch should be and move out of the way. They sit the couch down, and Cole walks out. Layne comes over to me. “Can we talk in a bit?” he asks. I can see the hope in his eyes that I’ll finally listen to him.

  “Sure,” I give him a weak smile as he walks out to join Cole to grab some boxes Alexis had in storage.

  “Pizza is on the way. It’s my treat, so don’t worry about it. What did Layne say?” she whispers.

  “He asked if we could talk in a bit. I can’t say I’m not nervous because my stomach is in knots right now.” I hold my stomach to try and calm my nerves. Of course I would hear him out, I owe us both that. The pizza guy appears at the door in a flash and Alexis pays for it and brings it to the kitchen setting it on the island. I grab some paper plates and napkins. The boys come in and set the boxes down when they see we got pizza.

  “Smells good,” Cole says.

  “Help yourself,” Alexis tells them.

  I grab a slice and watch as Layne does the same. We don’t speak, but I feel his gaze on me, making me feel uneasy, and I’m hoping my cheeks aren’t flushed. Once Cole and Layne finish their slice of pizza, they move a few of the boxes into Alexis’s room. I notice Cole comes back out to the kitchen, but Layne still hasn’t come out.

  LAYNE

  I walk into Renee’s room to check it out. She has a picture of us from one the parties I had this year on her nightstand. I pick it up and look at us; we look like two best friends having a good time. It’s been a struggle not having her in my life these last few weeks. Actually, it’s been hell and I missed her smiling face, and it damn near killed me trying my best to give the space she wanted. But now I’ve had enough, and she is lucky she agreed to finally talk to me or else I would have made her listen to me.

  Renee appears in the doorway and she leans against the door frame and crosses her arms over her chest. “What are you doing in here?”

  “Waiting for you. Come sit.” I pat the empty space on the bed next to me. She sits next to me and doesn’t say anything. Instead, she turns to face me and crosses her legs into a pretzel and I do the same. As her eyes bore into mine, I want to grab her and kiss the hell out of her, but I know I can’t.

  I grab her hand a
nd pull it into my lap, holding onto it, partly so she can’t escape and partly because I need to touch her, even if it isn’t sexual. I just need to feel her, to make sure she is real and that I didn’t dream her up all those years ago. “I just wanted to tell you that I am deeply sorry. Honestly, I don’t know if what Dylan said was true or if he just wanted a rise out of you. What I do know, is that at that time I was in a messed up place, grieving Amber’s death. I was mostly in a daze and I don’t even know how I survived it myself. If I would have known I would have killed him with my bare hands and then told you about it. I would never intentionally keep that from you. Honestly, though, I think he just wanted a rise out of you. Do you think you can forgive me and move past this?”

  I watch as her body relaxes. “I’m sorry I slapped you. I let my emotions get the best of me and I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you. I miss my best friend and I’d love nothing more than to move past this.” She smiles.

  I throw my arms around her and kiss her cheek multiple times, causing her to giggle.

  “Okay let’s not get carried away here.” She giggles as she pushes me away. We should head back out there before they think we are in here doing something else.” She flashes me a wink.

  Her comment makes me chuckle, because I don’t see how that could be a bad thing. I throw my arm around her shoulder, kiss the side of her head, and then we meet Cole and Alexis in the kitchen as they are laughing over pizza.

  “You guys cool?” Cole asks.

  “We’re cool,” Renee says before I can answer.

  “Thank god,” Alexis says with a roll of her eyes.

  “Okay let’s pop this champagne open to celebrate your apartment,” I say, grabbing hold of the bottle. I open it and the cork flies across the room, causing the liquid to pour over. I rush to fill everyone’s glass. We clink our glasses and sip on the fruity champagne.

  RENEE

  I’m happy Layne and I were able to move past this. I missed him so much, that even my heart hurt, physically and emotionally. And the last few weeks have been hell without him in my life. Sometimes, especially with us being so close this year, I feel like I need to live and breathe him. If only I were brave enough to tell him.

  “You guys coming to the race tomorrow?” Layne asks.

  “I’ll be there,” I say to him as I look over to Alexis and Cole.

  “The three of us will be there,” Alexis says, causing Cole to raise his eyebrow at her, and she smiles. The girl is radiating a glow that I’ve only seen when Cole is around.

  We all sit in the kitchen, laughing and enjoying each other’s company. I can’t believe Layne and I are back to being best friends and it’s like no time passed. He gave the space I needed and then it was time to confront the issue. I’m thankful he came and asked to talk. Seeing him in my bedroom and on my bed raised the hotness factor, and I couldn’t help but wonder.

  Being away from Layne any longer would have only depressed me and I probably would have started starving myself again. But by doing that, I only hurt myself. Luckily, I have Alexis for support as well as me supporting her if the need arises. I watch as the three laugh at something Cole said and I feel lucky to have these people in my life. I have a feeling Cole will be sticking around for a while, especially where Alexis is concerned. Layne catches me looking around.

  “Everything okay?” he asks while rubbing his hand on my back.

  “Yes. I just happy, and I feel content. It’s hard to explain.”

  “I know what you mean. I’m glad you are giving our friendship another chance. I missed you,” he whispers.

  “I missed you, too,” I bump his shoulder with mine, throwing him off balance.

  “Well, I better go; I have a race to prepare for tomorrow. You ready, Cole?” Layne asks.

  “Yep. Thanks for the pizza,” he says to Alexis.

  “Thank you guys for moving that stuff in here.” Alexis motions, pointing to the couch and boxes scattered across the floor.

  Layne hugs me tight, “See you tomorrow,” and he plants a kiss on my cheek.

  Alexis and I bid them goodbye and we start to unpack some of the boxes she had stored. “Did Cole ask you out yet?” I say, pouring some of the champagne into my glass.

  “No, he didn’t. We are friends. That is all,” she says.

  “Okay. I just thought I’d ask. He seems to be smitten with you.” I giggle.

  “How about we just focus on unpacking these boxes?” Alexis says.

  “Fine.”

  I grab a box with kitchen utensils and I wash them before putting them in the drawer. Once we get the kitchen done, then we tackle a few more small boxes with knick knacks and throw pillows and such. “This couch is pretty comfy,” I say after bouncing on it.

  “I know; I love it,” Alexis says.

  I step back and admire the work we put into the apartment. The dark blue oversized couch and ottoman are the stars of the living room. There is a small TV on a stand against the wall. And we have a full view into the small kitchen and the little red appliances decorating the counters. Around the corner from the living room is the hallway that leads to the full bath and then our bedrooms at the end. My bedroom has a nice picture window with a seat and storage underneath; it will be my reading spot for sure. My bed has the sleigh bed headboard and footboard and cost me a small fortune on my credit card. But I love it and it was worth every penny.

  Once Alexis and I finish what needs to be done, I settle into my comfortable bed with a book until I fall asleep.

  Chapter Eighteen

  SPRING

  I wake to the smell of coffee wafting into my room. Once I squint my eyes open, I see that Alexis must have set a steaming mug on my nightstand. I sit up in my bed, sipping on the hot liquid until I can fully awaken.

  Once I drink my mug, I head for the shower and I hear Alexis moving around in the kitchen. Instead of heading to the shower, I go to the kitchen and find her.

  “Thanks for the mug of coffee.” I set the mug down on the counter. “I’m going to shower.” I’m glad I can have my own space and not worry about it. We have our own drawers and a cabinet in the bathroom.

  After my shower, I throw on a pair of skinny jeans and a midnight blue one shoulder top and a pair of wedges since the weather is turning out to be nice now. I throw a headband in my hair and let it air dry then I meet Alexis in the kitchen as I carry my phone with me checking my messages.

  “Here is a refill.” Alexis passes my newly filled mug over to me as I sit on a stool along the island. I watch as she fills a mug up for herself and joins me. “I’m so glad this winter weather is over with. So I feel the hot sun on my face now. I bet you can’t wait until the race in a few hours, huh?” She brings the cup up to her lips to hide her smile, but her eyes give it away.

  “What about you? You get to see Cole, too. Are you coming to the after party this time?”

  “I’m glad to see him again and I doubt I’ll be coming to the after party. I just don’t think it is a good idea at this point. I mean, if Cole and I were seeing each other then maybe I’d consider it. You know?”

  “I get it. And I don’t blame you. I mean, it’s always best to have a guy on your side so everyone knows not to mess with you. Even though Layne does not put up with that. But I get it.” I shake my head.

  “I just think baby steps right now are the best thing. I don’t want to rush into anything and I definitely don’t want to find myself in a predicament I can’t get out of. I think I’ll go shower now.” She hops off the stool and carries her mug out of the room.

  I open my phone. No messages. I tap my fingers on the island counter, not knowing what to do with myself. But then I remember I need to eat breakfast. I take out a skillet and make two egg white omelets and by the time Alexis comes back out I have a plate ready for her. She comes out in a pair of skinny jeans as well with a pink tee shirt and her hair blown out straight, as her hair is normally wavy.

  “Here, I made breakfast. And I like your hair. You lo
ok nice,” I tell her while scooping up a piece of my own omelet.

  “Thanks.” She shoves a bite in her mouth.

  We pass the time by washing and drying the dishes and watching a mini marathon of Friends. Finally after about four hours of sitting around, I get to see Layne race again. Just knowing I’ll see him gives me goose bumps and the butterflies start to flutter in my stomach. I don’t know what has gotten into me.

  “I can drive and you can drive my car back if you like? I’m sure I can get a ride back from Layne. Unless you want to ride with Cole.” I wink.

  “Ugh, you are terrible; you know that.”

  “But you know you love it.” I stick my tongue out at her as I go grab my bag, phone and keys.

  “How about I just drive myself? It seems more logical to me and I can follow you there,” she responds.

  “Fine. I’ll see you there then.” I get in my car and roll the windows down letting the cool wind whip my hair around. I pull off the highway and notice a few lookouts for the drag race. I wave and go through and park. I wait for Alexis as she parks next to me in a field. We make our way to the strip of road that the race is at.

  I spot Layne across the way and we make our way over to him. When he sees me, he doesn’t say anything. He reaches out hugging me tightly, and I feel him nodding to Alexis. “I’m so glad you came,” he says, pulling away.

  “Good luck out there. I know you won’t need it, though. You will be at the top in no time now.” I smile at him.

  He pulls me back toward him and whispers in my ear. “I heard there is someone here, checking out the talent. Maybe for a pro position in legal drag racing, on a track in the pro circuits. I don’t know.”

  His whisper, even though it was the simplest thing, sends shivers down my spine. Either I’m in a dry spell and need some, or Layne is really starting to affect me, in a big way. “You’ll be fine,” I whisper back.

  I pull back and pat him on the back as he starts to walk to his car. I know this profession is quite dangerous and I always wish for his safety, because the last wreck he was in was quite scary and he was quite lucky to make it out alive. I can’t stand the thought of losing him; it causes me to swallow a hard lump that’s formed in my throat. I decide that he should know how I feel, eventually. I was so caught up in Layne that I didn’t even notice Cole approaching and he and Alexis are having a conversation. I back up to the side of the road and wait as Layne gets ready to take off. His opponent, Jeff, is a tough one, but I know Layne can do it.