by Anne Key
“You don’t make weather, do you? Weather is like… God or wind patterns or something.” If they could make weather, why waste it on snow when people needed water so bad?
Eli laughed and leaned close, touching his nose to hers. “The ski areas make snow all the time, Sparkles. They have snowblowers.” He kissed her quickly and leaned back again. “They’re not making weather, just snow. You are from Texas and not, like, Mars, right?”
“I think maybe it might as well have been Mars.” It had been almost four months, and it still felt like she was so far behind.
“Hey.” Eli slowly pulled her into a hug. She felt him sigh. “I was only kidding. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t mind me. I’m a silly. I just think too much. And just wait. One day, we’ll go to Texas together, and I’ll be the one that’s a local.”
“I would love that. I’d be such a weird Yankee, I’d probably pass easy,” he snorted. “Or I’d get my ass kicked. Wouldn’t be the first time.”
“We’ll go to Austin. It’s not great, but it’s our best option.”
“You don’t think I could fool your cowboy ex-boyfriends, huh?”
“Momma wouldn’t let me date cowboys. She said they were trashy.” Football players? Sure. And they’d hand Eli his teeth, she’d bet.
“Yeah? So, what do you think your mom would say about me?”
“She would say, ‘Samantha, have you thought about this? Really considered it?’ And I would say, ‘Yes, ma’am.’” It was the truth, and she just wouldn’t mention that Momma would be… disappointed. Daddy wasn’t.
“Practical. Okay.” Eli smiled at her. “Well, I know you’ve really considered it. But I get her. I still can’t believe it sometimes.” He was playing with her hair, looping his fingers through her curls.
“Me either, but I love you….” She almost said no matter what, but that wasn’t right. Not exactly. “… just like you are.”
There.
Except that he stared at her so long without saying anything, she thought maybe she’d said the wrong thing.
When he finally did say something, it was just one word, just her name. “Sammy.” And it seemed like he could barely get it out. Then he kissed her so hard, she had to take a step backward, and her back hit the concrete wall of the theater.
She grabbed hold of him, her eyes wide as she sucked in a deep breath. So, not the wrong thing. Not the wrong thing at all.
He pulled away just a bit, and he was more than a little breathless. “Thank you.” His cheeks were kind of damp, but he was smiling, and the grin just kept getting wider. “Thank you so much.”
She beeped his nose with a shaky finger. “I’m starting to like these dates of ours, Mr. Eli.”
God, she felt…. She wasn’t sure what all she felt. Shivery. Powerful. Totally out of her league and weirdly like she was totally in control.
“Uh-huh. Me too.” He took her face in his chilly fingers and kissed her again. “Let’s have more. Maybe somewhere warmer. And without the bottomless pit?” He laughed. “God, I am so… freakin’ happy. I love you, Sammy. You’re incredible.”
“You want to get together tomorrow afternoon? Finish the project and work on our costumes?” Share more of those heady kisses.
“Yes.” He jumped on that one quick. “Uh. We have lots of work to do.” He looked like he knew he wasn’t fooling anyone.
They were interrupted by the sound of a car horn, and Eli jumped.
“Your dad?” She didn’t want it to be, but she knew better. No one else was out here.
“Yeah.” He put slightly more distance between them but kept hold of her hand. “Get ready.”
“For—”
“Hey, you guys, it’s freezing out here. Hop on in.”
“I got it, Dad.” Eli cut his daddy off and opened the door for her.
“Did you have a good time?”
“So good. Thank you for the ride, sir.”
“You’re welcome, Sammy. Did you enjoy the movie?”
“It was a… chick flick.” Eli shrugged.
“Oh, I remember taking your mom to those on dates.”
“Dad.”
“What?”
“Really?”
“Just making conversation, Eli.”
Eli huffed out a sigh.
“He laughed a few times. He didn’t hate it.” She touched his knee, just so carefully.
Eli looked at her and smiled.
“What did you guys have for dinner?”
“Uh—a cheeseburger. It was pretty good.”
“I have tryouts Monday, so I had a salad. Hopefully, I’ll have a celebration burger Tuesday night.”
Eli nodded. “Count me in.”
“Well, good luck to you.”
She was starting to learn her way around because she recognized when they turned down her street.
“Thank you for tonight, Eli. It was amazing. Tomorrow, if your folks say yes?”
“It’s a school project; they’ll say yes. I’ll text you.”
They pulled into her driveway, and Eli hopped out of the car with her. “Thank you, Sammy. I don’t know how to… just, thank you.”
“Silly boy. Love you. See you tomorrow.” She hugged him real quick, then kissed his cheek. “Gotta go. Night!”
The lights were all on in the house, and Jian and Daddy were watching TV when she came in.
“Hey, right on time.”
“Yes, sir. Is there any fruit, Daddy?” She was starving, and she doubted Daddy would be all over giving her diet pills.
“Two on the couch, honey.”
“Jian!” Daddy slapped Jian’s knee. “Yes, Sammy. There are some apples on the counter in the kitchen. Did Eli dump you over dinner or something? I’ll kill him.” She was pretty sure he was joking.
“Nope. He told me he loved me.” She dropped that like a diamond into a glass of champagne and headed for the kitchen.
It took about three seconds for Daddy to appear in the doorway. “Well. I guess it was a good date, then?”
“It was a good date. Can he come over tomorrow to finish our project?” She grabbed the apple slicer. “You want a piece?”
Daddy waved off the offer. “The science thing? Sure, he can. I’m happy for you, sweetheart.”
“I am too. There’s some body complications we’ll have to work on, but I’m not there yet.” She wasn’t sure Eli was even close to there yet, and they were going to have to have a few uncomfortable discussions, but not tonight.
“Speaking as someone whose plumbing is the same as his partner’s, it’s really not that complicated.” He leaned in the doorway, crossed his arms, and smiled at her. “Uh-huh. You thought you were going to shock me with that one, didn’t you? I’m… evolving.”
“No. I was figuring the ‘love’ part was enough shock for one night. You are an old dude, after all.”
She’d grown up with a lawyer. Daddy had no chance.
“Ha. It was. Sex is way easier than love. Just keep it safe. And talk to me. If you want. Franny made it pretty clear to me that’s my job.”
“I’m not sure how any of that’s supposed to really work. What you find online is….” She shrugged, hearing her momma telling her, If you can’t talk about it…. “… intense. Like whoa.”
“Uh. Yeah. Research is… okay. Especially if you’re learning about safety, right? But most of what you’re going to find online is fantasy, Sammy. Sex is about what feels good, what’s fun. It just… it’s an extension of how you feel about each other. That’s it. If you’re at that point with Eli, if you’ve talked about it with him and that’s what both of you want, then do yourself a favor and just… stay off the internet. Figure out what you and Eli… like. And talk about that with him. If you need advice after that, I’m here.”
Daddy looked a little worried, but he was taking it seriously, at least, and not stammering at her for once.
“Thanks, Daddy. I’m not ready yet. I think… I think I need him to want to talk about
it to me first, you know?” Guys never seemed to be all that shy about telling what they needed. She couldn’t imagine two guys being all… boys together. It had to be exhausting.
“You’re pretty… thoughtful about him, Sammy. About the two of you.” He stepped over and kissed her on the forehead. “He’s lucky to have you as a girlfriend.”
“He’s nice. You don’t know how rare that is, and I’m….” She shrugged and hugged Daddy real quick. She didn’t think he’d get it—how sometimes she felt like her soul was made of tissue paper since Momma died. Daddy wasn’t a girl, and he hadn’t been in love with Momma. Aunt Franny probably understood, but she didn’t want to tell anyone about it. Sammy wasn’t crazy, and she wasn’t losing her shit, but she wasn’t as strong as she used to be. She needed nice. She wanted Eli. “I’m fixin’ to head to bed. I love you, huh?”
“Oh, sweetheart I love you too. I’m glad you had a good night. I really am. Sleep well, okay?”
“Yep.” Like she was going to do that. She was going to get on Skype with Eli and tell Lace about her date. She headed up with her Diet Coke and her apple, dropped them off in her room, grabbed her shorts and sweatshirt, and then went to take most of her makeup off, just leaving the waterproof mascara.
She heard the text come in before she’d made it back to her room and hurried over to pick up her phone. She laughed at Lacey.
Well? Call me. I’m DYING.
She called, putting the phone on speaker so she could get settled in the bed with her snack and her laptop. She messaged Eli with a “3” as she sat. “How’s it going, girlfriend?”
“Jackson busted up his stupid car. Your night had to be better.”
“Oh my God. Were you in it? Are you okay?” She blinked at the phone like she was facetiming.
“I’m fine. He did it today sometime after the game. I was with Momma. She took me and Hailey for hair and all. But I did nothing tonight.”
Eli texted her back. Parents said tomorrow is cool. When?
1?
“Oh man, that totally sucks. No one here drives. It’s all buses and such.”
“That sounds horrible. So, you had a nice bus ride tonight, then?” Lacey laughed.
“There. Eli’s daddy picked us up after the movie.” And Eli had told her he loved her.
1! <3
“Lord. Picked up by his daddy.” Sammy just knew she was shaking her head. “So, things with him are good? Like actually good?”
“Like actually good. He said he loved me. Like for real out loud.”
She hated this part of texting. When was it time to stop? When did you keep going?
“No. For real? And what did you say?”
“That I loved him too.”
They both squealed together, and she rocked herself for a second, so totally tickled that Lacey got it, got her, still.
“So, are you going to hook up? Whoa. How do you hook up if he doesn’t have a car? You have to send me a picture of this boy.”
“I—we’re not there yet. Eli’s different and… we’ll have to talk it over.” Because she didn’t know. Did he want her? Was that even a thing? She’d seen Bing. Trans people had sex.
“Well, he can’t be that different. He’s a boy. If he hasn’t asked yet, he will. Do you want to? I mean, if you really love him….”
“I—” Oh God. Oh God, okay. She’d promised not to tell, but Lacey was her best friend and they told each other everything, all the things. God. “I’ll let him ask.”
That was fair, right? God.
“Well, then at least you’ll know what he wants, I guess. I can’t keep Jackson’s hands off me.” She laughed. “Boys.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I know.” And she did, except now, she didn’t. Well, she still knew, but she wasn’t sure what to expect.
Good night Sparkles. Sleep well. CU tomorrow
“So, are you still doing tryouts on Monday? You’re going to kick those Yankee girls’ butts, you know.”
Love you Eli. Night!
“I am. We’ll see. I don’t know. What if I’m just a hick? I mean, it’s not like we’re from Houston.” Georgetown was close to Austin, kinda, but it was still a million miles away, somehow.
“Just a hick. Just a hick that can out-flip most of the squad. Just a hick that’ll show ’em how it’s done in Texas. Please.”
“Yeah. Yeah, I guess you’re right.” She hoped so. Truth was she was scared—of making it, of not making it.
“You got this, girlfriend.”
“I miss you, Lace. Seriously. You think you can come? Maybe for spring break?”
She couldn’t look Christmas in the face, not yet. Hell, she hadn’t even told Lacey that Eli was Jewish.
“Oh, totally! Let me ask Momma. I’d love it. I miss you too. Lots. Text me when your break is.”
“Okay, will do. Totally. I’m going to crash. I have to practice like a mad thing tomorrow.”
“I’m not worried about you. Night, Sammy!”
“Night.”
Okay. Well, Sammy was a little less worried about herself than she had been a month ago too, so she’d take it.
Chapter 20
THEY WERE only getting together to work on their science project, but Eli was feeling a little—well, he wanted to make an impression. They were serious now; they weren’t just dating anymore; they were actually together, right? Like, “all the time” together, not just dances and movies. He was with Sammy now. Sammy was his girl.
He dug his most comfortable binder and favorite pair of jeans out of his drawer. They weren’t going out, and he didn’t feel like he needed to layer up, so he pulled out his black-and-gray Twenty One Pilots T-shirt, and that was it.
He spent some time in the bathroom, shaving away that stupid girly peach fuzz on his cheeks, brushing his teeth, and maneuvering a rolled-up sock into his briefs just so. It was a silly thing to do maybe, but he liked the illusion, and it looked good under his jeans.
He was ready way early, so he headed to the kitchen for a snack.
“Hey. Getting ready to go?”
“Yep.” Oh God. Dad.
“Sammy’s dad is going to be home?”
“Uh-huh.” Eli slipped past his dad and grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl.
“How long are you staying?”
“Um. I don’t know. Do I have to tell you now?”
“Nope, stay as long as you like. Just text us if you won’t be home for dinner.”
“Okay.” He took a bite of his apple and felt his dad staring at him. “Wha?” he asked, mouth full.
Dad shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m just… you look so comfortable. I thought this thing with Sammy would be harder for you.”
“Sammy makes it easy. She’s just… cool. She’s so real.”
“I’m glad.”
Eli nodded. “Gotta hop, Dad.”
“Have fun.”
Eli gave his dad a fast hug and hurried out the door with his board and his backpack. It was a quick trip over, made even quicker by a distracting daydream about Sammy. He was at her house, walking up the front walk, but he didn’t remember the trip. Weird. He left his board on the porch and knocked.
Mr. Moore’s boyfriend answered the door in paint-covered jeans and T-shirt. “Hey, Eli. Sammy’s upstairs hiding from the paint fumes. Go on up. Second door on the left.”
“Hey. Thanks, Jian.” Go on up? Okay, he hadn’t expected that, at all. He played it cool, took his time crossing the living room, and headed up the stairs. He hadn’t been upstairs in the old Victorian yet, so that was cool too. The treads creaked under his feet, and the banister was a little crooked, which just made him smile. He was so going to fix up a place like this one day.
He stopped outside the second door on the left and took a deep breath before knocking. “Hey, Sparkles,” he called through the door. “It’s me.”
“Hey, Me, come on in. It’s supercrazy stinky down there, huh?” She looked so pretty with her hair up in pigtails, wearing a tiny pair of shorts a
nd a huge, heavy sweatshirt.
“It is pretty stinky, yeah.” Although truthfully, he didn’t mind the smell of paint at all. He hesitated and looked at the door. Don’t make it weird. That was like, his new motto. Sammy had it closed for a reason, so he reached back and leaned on it carefully until it clicked.
He dumped his backpack on the floor, his jacket on top of it, and tugged his T-shirt straight. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in pigtails. They’re cute.” And her shorts were short. He pretended not to notice.
She stuck her tongue out at him. “You want to sit on the desk chair? That way we can spread out.”
“Sure.” He reached for the chair. So, cute was bad? He’d meant that as a compliment. Don’t call her cute. Okay. He pulled the chair over and hauled his backpack up on it to dig out his notebook. “I finished the illustration Friday night, so it’s just putting the pages together, I think. And maybe adding some notes to the end. Oh, and I guess the bibliography. You were working on that?” He’d chosen, before he knew she’d be his partner for sure, the Magnus effect, and they were using the curveball to illustrate the principle. He showed her the drawing he’d done of the spin on the ball as it left the pitcher’s hand and the way the air around it reacted.
“Oh, that’s great! You did that? I can’t draw my way out of a paper bag.” She beamed at him and bounced a little bit. “I have the bibliography all done.” She leaned over, bracing herself on his shoulder to reach for the printer.
“I draw a little.” Maybe more than a little. He really liked the artwork on his skateboard. “This isn’t that great. I think the proportion of the pitcher’s arm is all wrong, but it’s the best I could do.” One of her pigtails swung into his face and he caught it in one hand and gave it a light tug. “But the big stuff is all done. We are awesome.”
“We are.” She turned her head and just kissed him like it was no big deal, surprising the hell out of him once again. Then she sat down, bouncing on the bed. “A great team.”
He licked his lips and smiled at her. “Well, yeah.” He tugged the bibliography out of Sammy’s fingers to look at it, but also to cover for his hot cheeks and the way she’d just made his heart race. “This looks good.”