INK: Vanishing Point (Book 2)

by Roccaforte, Bella

  The comb drags through the tangles left in my hair, and my head is sensitive where the stitches are, but the wound looks healed. That tells me that I must have been in that place for a week or more. I search through the bathroom drawers for some small scissors and hit pay dirt when I find a first aid kit under the counter. I’m a little squeamish, but I’m not going to the doctor. I can get these out myself. Carefully, I snip each stitch and pull them out. Well, my head didn’t open up and let my brain fall out, so it must be okay.

  Next, I need to look at the gashes on my arm and belly. I put some antibiotic cream on the cuts, then pull them together with butterfly bandages and dress them with gauze pads.

  “Haven’t you become very capable?” An oily voice invades my thoughts. I ignore it and continue to tend to my injuries. “Oh come now, won’t you play?”

  “Go away,” I answer without looking up from what I’m doing.

  When I finish dressing the last scrape, I pack up the first aid kit and place it back under the counter. What next? I ask myself standing in the doorway. The bed is neatly made and inviting.

  I climb under the heavy comforter and am surrounded by all things Aiden: the woodsy-clean smell of the bed that is unequivocally him. My grip on the covers tightens and the emotional dam bursts in me. Hopelessness fills me, and it feels like I’m back in that place. As if I’m weak and unable to take care of myself, but I’m not. I can take care of myself.

  Does sadness really make me weak? No. Grieving for the loss of someone who I love doesn’t make me weak. Hiding my tears would be weak. Apologizing for my sorrow would be even weaker. I completely let go, and my body shakes as the hot tears sting my face and soak the pillow. Images of Aiden play on a loop in my memory. I try to only conjure only the good memories, not the angry or disappointed ones. If nothing else, I did love him, faults and all.

  Our first kiss, the way his lips felt against mine, far too wet and too forceful. He was so awkward. The first time he told me he loved me. I made fun of him and told him he was a dork. A laugh pulls its way through me, dragging with it a piece of my soul. The first time we made love, it was so wonderful and pure. That moment. If I could freeze it and hold it in my hand…my kingdom to relive that memory. Each of the sweet things Aiden did. He would always wake up before me and greet me with a big smile. He never treated me as if I was some fragile long-stem rose. The grief slowly turns to adoration for what Aiden and I had. With that under control, I feel like I can confront my own demons. Realize that feeling all of that didn’t make me weak or fragile, that I am strong. Let’s see someone else survive what I just did.

  It’s time for me to make some serious changes and take charge of my life. Nobody else has to live this but me, and if I’m going to be dealing with hardship, I can do it on my own without any complications. I let that roll around in my thoughts. “No complications,” I say as I drift off to sleep, still inhaling Aiden’s scent from the comforter, wishing I could bottle it and take it with me. I know that things are about to get a hell of a lot better now that I’m back in control. But first I will rest.

  Chapter 30

  Not in this Bed

  Shay Dreaming

  “Hey.” Gabriel’s smooth voice penetrates my sleep. He’s rocking my hip. “Babe? You’ve been sleeping for a long time; are you okay?”

  The covers nestle around me, and I don’t want to move, because movement hurts. I grumble a reply, “I’m fine.”

  He shakes me again. “Come on, I’m worried about you.”

  In my head I just want to scream at him to shut the hell up and let me bask in the comfort of Aiden’s bed. I’m growing more irritated by the minute; has anyone ever heard the phrase “let a sleeping dog lie?” Wait. Aiden’s bed? My eyes spring open and I spin to see Gabriel in the bed with me.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” I’m furious. This feels like a heinous violation of some social code that can get me locked up in karma jail for years. There’s got to be something written somewhere about sleeping with another guy in your ex’s bed when he’s…dead. My head is spinning and Gabriel is staring at me bewildered.

  “Babe, calm down.” He puts his warm hands on my shoulders, pulling me into him. I notice he’s not wearing a shirt.

  Completely torn between ogling his chiseled form and being disgusted by this situation, I close my eyes as I pull away from him. “Gabriel, you can’t be here.”

  “Why not?” He tugs me in close to his warmth. “You need me.”

  That phrase. I’ve been hearing it for months, weeks, years, hell, maybe even decades. Fuck that. I don’t need anyone, and I’m damn tired of being told I do. “I don’t need you.” I spit it out, hateful.

  He reaches toward me. “Honey, listen; you’re tired and probably starved. I just want to be here for you. Make sure you have everything you need.”

  “Look, Gabriel.” Grudgingly, I get out of the bed. “I don’t want you here, not right now. I want you to go.”

  He peels the covers back; to my relief he’s wearing pajama bottoms. He meets me on my side of the bed and puts a finger under my chin to lift my gaze to his. I fight the urge to fall into his gray eyes, and McNab’s words rattle through my mind again. Is the whole world in heat?

  “I know you are rattled right now. What you just went through is something no one should ever have to endure.” He pushes a stray hair behind my ear. “I just want to be here if you need me.”

  “Gabriel, until I know exactly what all of this is, exactly who you are and what part of my twisted psyche created you, I’m going to go it on my own.” Taking two steps back, I continue. “I ended up here for a reason, in this room.” I motion to the room around us.

  “Yes, my room.” His eyes are trying to pierce through my crazy. “Of course you came here, so I could help you.”

  “This isn’t your room.” I belt it out, insulted.

  “It is, though.” He believes what he’s saying.

  “No.” I look around, and the room changes into a small room with cracks in the walls and bizarre art pieces hanging, touching corner to corner. The lighting of the room changes from warm honey hues to blue desperation. The temperature drops several degrees, sending a biting chill through me. “How?”

  “Get back under the covers. Let me get you some tea.” He points me toward the bed, rubbing my arms to chase away the cold.

  In my confusion I become compliant, until I’m about to climb into the bed. I stop and whisper, “Gabriel, what are you?”

  “I’m everything you need when you need it.” He smiles and lands his lips on my cheek. “I’m all you’ll ever need.”

  A smile tugs at the corner of my mouth. “Oh yeah.”

  Aiden’s memory wafts through the forefront of my thoughts. I look at Gabriel; there’s something off. “Wait.” I stop him from covering me.

  “What is it, babe?” He tenderly holds my hand.

  “I want to go home.”

  “Home? You are home.” He tries to tuck me in again.

  “No, I want to wake up now.” A wry smile rises to my lips. “I know what this is, and I’m pretty damn sure I know how to control it now.” I lift my hand above the covers and wave at him.

  Sitting straight up, I’m satisfied that I’m once again back in Aiden’s bed, surrounded by his essence. I need that right now. “Huh, kinda cool. I’m starting to get this.”

  The covers poof out as I fall back into the feather-soft bed for deeper slumber. I’m satisfied that I’m once again on the road to self-reliance and okay with the fact that I’m flawed and I’m going to have to muddle through it all.

  Chapter 31

  Conflict of Interest

  Harry

  “This is my little girl that we are talking about, not just any ‘subject’ that you have me pursuing.” Trying to remain as devoid of emotion as I can is rough.

  “Yes, we understand. However, if she is indeed ‘the subject,’ then we have a fundamental problem. It would seem as though you have a confli
ct of interest,” Charles answers in a confident yet slippery voice. I’ve never noticed that before now.

  “I can do my job here, but there are some fundamental truths.” I stand from my chair at the conference table, and then pace to the projection board. “Not only is my daughter not responsible for this, but I think it’s entirely possible that we, yes we, as a group have not been taking the necessary precautions in protecting those closest to us when we are doing ‘the work.’”

  “So you are to blame?” Sara says, perking up in her chair.

  “This isn’t about blame, this is about accountability,” Derrick counters. “I’m with Harry; Watching what has happened has me convinced we need to work a little harder to shield ourselves and our families from ‘the work.’”

  Charles clears his throat to speak when my phone rings. I check the caller ID. “Excuse me, I have to take this.”

  After clearing the door to the conference room, I answer. “Hello?”

  “Mr. Baynes?” Her voice is shaky and unsure.

  “Yes?”

  “This is Angela, at the Roth’s.” Her thick accent is sometimes hard to understand, but I’ve known her for years.

  “Oh yes, Angela. I’m in the middle of a meeting; can I call you back?” What the hell is this about?

  “Yes sir, but I just called to tell you Shay is here. She’s sleeping in Aiden’s room, and she no looks so good.” She’s speaking in a whisper.

  “What? Shayleigh is there?” I’m so relieved, I want be there instantly. “What’s wrong with her?”

  “She pretty banged up, and she been sleeping long time.”

  “Okay, I’m going to send someone over. Don’t wake her. But watch her. You hear me, Angela?” I’m emphatic. I need to get Eli over there ASAP.

  “And if she wakes up, give her whatever she wants. Don’t leave her alone.” I hang up the phone and go back into the conference room.

  “Sorry about that.” I slide the phone in my pocket. “I need to know that you are going to devote some resources to this.”

  “You’ve got our full backing for now. But we don’t want you flying solo on this. You need a partner so we know that your decisions aren’t…clouded.” Derrick raises his eyebrows in anticipation of my resistance.

  “I couldn’t agree with you more.” I push my chair in. “Please send someone down, pronto. I have phone calls to make.”

  Before I get the door closed, I’ve already dialed Eli’s number.

  Chapter 32

  Lost & Found

  Eli

  “McNab, is there anything?” I ask, standing in the doorway to the guest room.

  “Pitch? Anything?” McNab is sitting in a folding chair with his feet propped up on the dresser and doesn’t look up from his tablet.

  “No, just like ten minutes ago, and twenty minutes ago…seriously, dude, do you think I wouldn’t tell you if something changed?” Pitch’s tone is tired and irritable.

  “Pitch,” McNab reprimands.

  Pitch gets up from the makeshift workstation he’s sitting at and crosses the room toward the door. “Yeah, well, you’d be irritated if every two minutes you had a different asshole asking you if there’s a change.” He exchanges a hard stare with McNab.

  McNab takes his feet down and slowly rises to meet Pitch. “Problem?”

  “Yeah, actually, there is.” Pitch is a little spitfire, but he can’t possibly think this is a good time. One thing McNab hasn’t been able to hide is that he is emotionally invested in this. I’ve watched him hit ignore on his phone for three days straight, and his concern is rising. Neither of us has slept more than five or ten minutes at a clip.

  “Maybe you should take it outside and get some air, come back with a clear mind.” McNab demands it.

  “Yeah.” Pitch pushes past me out the door.

  McNab sits back in the folding chair, and I sit in Pitch’s seat, which is uncomfortably close to where the portal was. It closed right after I came back through. The room is normal again with the exception of what still needs cleaned up, but there’s no longer never-ending ooze, fog or spectral readings in the room. It’s just a room that’s a hell of a mess. I know that McNab and Carl must blame me for not bringing her back. But they don’t know what I saw in there. I’m not even sure it was her.

  “McNab.” I call to him quietly.

  “Yes, Eli.” McNab looks up begrudgingly.

  “What happened? Where did she go?” I ask, afraid of the answer.

  “That’s what I’m trying to figure out. I’ve never lost one before.” He stares at me with disdain.

  “Easy McNab, this isn’t his fault.” Carl stands in the doorway.

  “Really, Carl? Because I would have brought her back.”

  “You don’t know that, I doubt you could have. She doesn’t have an emotional attachment to you like she does to Eli.” Carl’s tone is just shy of scolding. “The kind of love she feels for Eli is pretty rare. Your friendship doesn’t compare.”

  My heart fills with hope that Carl can see that. I would love to believe it to be true, but don’t we all want to believe that about the people we love, that their love for us is “rare?”

  “I guess we will never know now, will we?” McNab goes back to being cool and unaffected.

  “Besides, what she was feeling…” Carl shakes his head.

  “Tell me more about that, Carl. You’ve been hedging the question every time I ask.” McNab leans forward, putting his tablet on the bed.

  My phone rings before Carl is able to answer. “Harry?”

  “Eli, you need to get over to the Roth estate. Shay’s there.” He’s winded like he’s running a marathon.

  “You’re kidding me.” I jump from my chair.

  “No, get over there now. She’s asleep.”

  “On my way.”

  “Hey, Eli.” He stops me from hanging up the phone.

  “Yeah?”

  “Be easy with her. She’s in rough shape.”

  “I will. I’ll call you when I get her home.” I hang up and contemplate whether to tell them where I’m going, but I see the smile on Carl’s face.

  “Tell him on the way,” I say to Carl as I head out the door.

  Chapter 33

  Biscuits & Gravy

  Shay

  Finally feeling rested, I have no idea how long I’ve been asleep. I pick up the clock on the nightstand. “Eight forty-five.” I gauge the light in the room. Okay, AM.

  My muscles and body ache, and I’m reminded of the beating I took with every move I make. I wince and look down at my patch job. A little blood is coming through the bandages. Nothing I can’t handle; well, maybe. Gingerly, I put my feet on the floor, and the door creaks open. It startles me at first, until the smell of fresh baked biscuits and scrambled eggs fills my senses.

  “Knock knock, Miss Shay.” Angela has her back to me as she pushes through the door.

  “It’s okay, Angela.” I sit back down, and she brings the tray to me on the bed.

  “You should eat,” she says, unfolding a napkin.

  “No worries there. Thank you.” I’m so hungry I could’ve eaten the bed. But I know I need to take it easy. Gravy, scrambled eggs with cheese, and yes, fresh biscuits. “How did you know I was here?”

  “I came in to dust and saw you in the bed. I’ve taken your clothes. I was going to wash them, but they really were not able to be saved.” She is looking at me curiously. “When did you get here?”

  “I don’t really know; most of the last few days have been a mystery to me.” I’ve always felt pretty close to Angela, she’s been around ever since Aiden’s mom took off. I dip a biscuit in the gravy and immediately am in heaven. “Oh God, Angela this is so good.”

  “I’m glad you like it, Miss Shay.” She smiles. “If you need anything, please let me know.”

  “Actually, yes I do need something. Is Rodney here?” Rodney is my ticket home.

  “Yes, would you like him to prepare a car for you?” she asks.
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  “If he can just give me a ride to my dad’s, then I can get my spare key and my car.”

  “You know we still have the car that Mr. Oliver wanted you to have. Mr. Bryce has left instructions that it is yours whenever you want it.” She raises her eyebrows.

  Oliver wanted me to have it. I was always so proud, never accepting any help from him when offered. Never was anyone going to ever say I wanted to be with Aiden for his money, I wouldn’t allow it. Angela told me after the funeral how it broke his heart that I would never take his help. But now that Aiden is gone, Oliver is gone and I’m still here. It is technically my car, gifted to me after I graduated high school. In this instant, I make up my mind. “Please have Rodney pull it out of the garage. Oh, and please tell Uncle Bryce thank you.” I’ll have to remember to send him a note.

  “I will, Miss Shay.” She smiles. “Will you be staying with us?”

  The thought hadn’t occurred to me. “You mean stay here?”

  “Yes. You don’t think we keep this house open just for Mr. Bryce. He’s here less than Aiden is. We have instructions that if you or Eli ever have need of a place to stay, you may stay here indefinitely.”

  “Thanks Angela, but I could get used to this, and that’s not a good idea.”

  “The offer always stands; remember, Oliver always thought of you as a daughter.” She smiles as she backs out of the room.

  Breakfast has given me a new lease on life. What to do next? I need to get some clothes, I can’t very well run around in Aiden’s forever, and I need to go into the office and figure out where I’m going to stay. I could stay here.