The Visiting Surgeon

by Lucy Clark

  His hands rubbed gently up and down her back. She knew it was supposed to relax her but she couldn’t stop her body from tensing. What had she done, letting Jackson kiss her? There were several reasons why it had been a bad idea and one of them was that she was due in Theatre.

  Reluctantly, he let her go and she took three giant steps backwards. She was having trouble meeting his gaze but eventually her eyes met his.

  Helplessness and confusion were running rampant through her mind and along with it came fatigue. She didn’t have the energy for a post-mortem on what had just happened and she hoped Jackson realised this. She tucked a stray curl behind her ear and shook her head.

  ‘We shouldn’t have done that.’ Her words were a whisper.

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘Well, for starters, someone could have walked in and caught us.’ She pointed to the door.

  ‘They didn’t.’ He shrugged nonchalantly.

  ‘I’m due in Theatre soon. I should be concentrating. Hand reconstruction isn’t the same as a knee arthroscopy, you know.’ She turned and walked over to the sink, bracing her hands on the edge.

  ‘I know the difference,’ he replied, and she heard him walk towards her. She was so instinctively aware of him, it frightened her. Jackson rubbed his hands up and down her arms, making her resent her outburst. ‘I apologise for the timing. You’re right. You should be concentrating.’

  He dropped his hands although he didn’t move back. Susie felt slightly bereft but drew warmth from the nearness of his body.

  ‘We do, however,’ he continued, ‘need to talk.’

  ‘No, we don’t.’ She turned to look at him, determination running through her body. ‘We don’t need to discuss or dissect what just happened, Jackson. It happened. Let’s just leave it at that. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get my thoughts in order regarding this operation.’ With that, she sidestepped him and walked to the table.

  She collected the X-rays and scans, conscious of his gaze upon her. When she reached the door, she congratulated herself on not giving in to the urge to throw herself back into his arms. Just before she opened the door, he spoke.

  ‘We do need to talk, Susie, and we will.’

  She glanced over her shoulder. Blue eyes which had not too long ago been filled with desire were now filled with determination. Not trusting herself to say anything, she continued out the door, returning to her office with the hope of controlling her trembling body in private.

  Jackson stood in the tearoom for a good ten minutes after she’d walked out. His thoughts were completely jumbled and he was having a difficult time making head or tail of them. He’d kissed Susie! He’d kissed another woman! Guilt swamped him and he closed his eyes.

  What had he been thinking? He had responsibilities. He had a job to do. His behaviour had been far from professional yet at the same time it was becoming increasingly difficult to control his desire where Susie was concerned.

  She was interfering with his work, his concentration, and it wouldn’t do. At this moment he was supposed to be working with his staff but he’d needed to see her, needed to touch her, needed to kiss her.

  He opened his eyes and paced the room, forcing his thoughts into order. He’d kissed another woman—a woman who wasn’t Alison. It had been years since he’d kissed anyone else and now that he had…He shook his head in disgust. What type of man was he? His wife had died only eighteen months ago and here he was yearning for someone else. He was sure if their positions had been reversed, Alison wouldn’t have forgotten him so quickly and the knowledge stabbed at his heart.

  Jackson grimaced, pushing his fingers roughly through his hair and clenching his jaw. Never before had he allowed any woman to come between him and his work. He’d always separated them into neat little sections. He’d always prided himself on being one hundred per cent focused where work was concerned but now he appeared to have no control whatsoever.

  He had responsibilities to the visiting professorship. He had responsibilities to his staff. He had lectures to write, operations to perform and schedule deadlines to meet. Even when the professorship finished in December, he was due back at his hospital in Melbourne. They were waiting for him. He had obligations there as well.

  Yet one look at Susie and everything had gone! Gone! He shoved his hands in his pockets, thoroughly disgusted with himself and his behaviour. How could a woman make him lose control—over everything? Everything he’d prided himself on being. Reliable, responsible, respectable.

  ‘Ha!’ he snorted in self-disgust. She’d been studying and trying to focus on an extremely difficult procedure and he hadn’t cared. Hadn’t given her the same consideration he was sure she’d have given him.

  He stopped pacing, his jaw clenched tightly. He shouldn’t have kissed her. Shouldn’t have—but he had. At least he was man enough to accept his actions and take responsibility for them.

  Jackson dragged a deep breath into his lungs, the faint traces of her perfume lingering in the air around him. The awareness between them had been almost unbearable yet now both knew how incredible they were together. Kissing Susie hadn’t solved anything. It had only increased his desire, his yearning, his curiosity—and that made everything worse!

  The beeping of his pager was a welcome relief and he stalked across the room to the phone. ‘Richard?’ he said a moment later.

  ‘Everything is ready for your afternoon lecture,’ his aide told him.

  ‘Thanks.’

  ‘Did you manage to get your…business done?’

  Jackson heard the slight hint of resentment in Richard’s tone. When Jackson had refused to say where he was going or what he would be doing, Richard had started to sulk.

  ‘Yes. I’ll meet you in the lecture room.’ Jackson replaced the receiver and headed out of the tearoom. At least now he had something else to concentrate on.

  Susie was tired of concentrating. It had been a long afternoon in Theatre but at last the first stage of Hilda Kazinski’s hand reconstruction was completed. Now they needed to wait and see what happened before she could attempt the next stage.

  Wearily she degowned and shuffled to the tearoom to write up the notes. After that task was finished she sat down with a cup of coffee and put her feet up on the seat opposite. Closing her eyes, she sighed, glad the day was coming to an end.

  ‘Ah, they told me you were probably in here.’ Todd walked in and sat down. Susie opened one eye to look at him before closing it again. ‘You left your pager in Theatre,’ he informed her.

  Susie smothered a yawn and nodded. ‘I’ll get it later.’

  ‘How’d the surgery go?’

  ‘Good. We’ll see what happens over the next few days.’

  ‘Shall I include her in your research project?’

  ‘I haven’t spoken to her about it yet but I’d like her to be part of it.’ Susie shrugged. ‘There’s plenty of time. Right now, my friend, I am going to go home, soak in a tub and crawl into bed.’

  ‘Has the day been that bad?’

  Susie’s thoughts automatically turned to Jackson and the electrifying kiss they’d shared. Where was he now? What was he thinking? How was she ever going to face him again?

  ‘By the pained expression on your face,’ Todd said a moment later, ‘it looks as though it’s been horrible.’

  ‘No,’ she replied quickly. ‘No. Not horrible, just…long.’

  ‘Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but I’ve specifically come here to remind you.’

  ‘Of what?’

  ‘You see, I knew you’d forget.’

  Susie raised her eyebrows. ‘About what?’

  ‘The dinner.’

  Susie groaned and slumped forward onto the table, burying her head in her arms. ‘No. I’m too tired.’ As though to prove her point, she yawned.

  Todd only smiled. ‘You have to go, Susie.’

  ‘Why?’ She buried her head again.

  ‘Because you’re the acting head of department. It’s your dut
y to go.’ His tone was matter-of-fact. ‘Jackson’s going to be there,’ he said, as though he were dangling a carrot in front of her nose. Susie merely groaned in exasperation. ‘Come on,’ he said. ‘It’s almost six-thirty and the dinner starts in an hour.’

  ‘I don’t want to go,’ she stated stubbornly.

  ‘Drink your coffee, find some energy and put on your happy face.’

  ‘Or?’ Again, she looked at him.

  ‘Or I’ll quit.’

  Susie sat up straight, eyes wide open, body alert. ‘You’ll what?’

  ‘Ah…knew I could get your attention,’ he teased.

  ‘You’re mean,’ she grumbled, before finishing off her coffee. ‘All right. I’ll go but only so you don’t resign.’ She stood and walked to the sink with her empty cup. ‘And I want to leave after the main meal.’

  ‘Sure. That’s no problem. You don’t need to stay until the end but you do need to be there for the beginning.’

  ‘I don’t see why,’ she mumbled. ‘I’m not introducing anyone, I’m not the MC. Hey…’ She looked at him and pointed her finger. ‘You’re going, aren’t you?’

  ‘It’s part of my job. Now, go and get changed.’ He walked to the door. ‘I’ll see you there and don’t forget to pick up your pager.’

  ‘Yes, boss,’ she said, snapping to attention. Todd merely laughed and continued on his way.

  Susie did as she was told. She was used to doing as she was told. It probably came from being raised in a houseful of ten children. Someone was always giving her instructions or asking her to do something. Nothing had changed.

  ‘You’re thirty-six years old and nothing has changed,’ she said out loud as she unlocked the back door of her house. Instead of the relaxing bubble bath, she stepped beneath a hot shower before dressing. Tonight she wore a white embroidered bustier top and a straight, black silk skirt which came to her ankles. As with her other black outfit, there was a split at the back so she could walk without shuffling along like a geisha girl.

  She secured her hair up in a high ponytail, letting her curls do their thing. She kept telling herself that she wasn’t dressing for Jackson Myers. Oh, sure, he found her attractive—the kiss they’d shared was testimony to it—but she couldn’t help thinking that he’d like her hair up like this. Her masses of unruly curls were now out of the way, revealing her long, smooth neck that he’d made much of that afternoon.

  The lipstick she chose was one that was guaranteed not to ‘kiss off’, not that she was planning on doing any kissing tonight. She changed her earrings and decided on impulse not to wear anything around her neck. Just in case.

  Oh, who was she kidding? she thought as she slipped her stockinged feet into black shoes and picked up her clutch bag. Of course she was dressing for Jackson. She was eager to see his reaction to her outfit. To glimpse that smouldering desire in the blue depths of his eyes. To feel her heartbeat increase when he looked at her. To hope for another forbidden kiss.

  She drove with care to the function centre and walked through the door at precisely seven-thirty. She casually walked over to the corner of the room and, holding her breath, searched for Jackson. Todd saw her first and waved. He gave her a quick thumbs-up before returning his attention to the person he’d been talking to.

  ‘From the back, you look ravishing,’ a deep voice said from directly behind her. His breath fanned down her bare neck and Susie couldn’t help the shiver of delight that raced through her. ‘I don’t know if I’m game enough for you to turn around,’ he whispered. ‘You have the sexiest legs I’ve ever seen.’

  Susie was thankful the room was now swarming with people as waiters brought out trays of pre-dinner drinks. She had no idea what to say to Jackson. Her mind had gone blank the instant he’d spoken and all she’d been aware of had been the richness of his voice and the emotions he’d stirred in her.

  ‘Are you purposely trying to drive me insane?’ he asked as she slowly turned to face him.

  ‘And if I am?’ she challenged.

  Jackson merely smiled at her. ‘Are you flirting with me, Dr Monahan?’ he asked, mimicking her question from yesterday. Had it only been yesterday? So much had happened since his arrival in Brisbane. When he was lecturing or away from her, he found himself becoming impatient for time to pass, yet when he was with her he wanted time to slow down so he could savour every second.

  Susie laughed, amazed at how a few seconds in his company had increased her excitement. ‘Feels a lot like it, from what I can recall.’

  ‘You are…’ He paused, his gaze filled with desire as he looked down into her eyes. ‘Irresistible.’

  ‘I think I’m moving up in the world,’ Susie replied, and at Jackson’s frown she continued, ‘Well, last night, you said I was captivating. The night before you said I was breath-taking. Tonight, it’s irresistible.’

  He nodded, a slight smile playing on his lips. ‘That’s because I remember how good you felt in my arms. I’d give anything right now to take you out of here so we can be—Yes, well, hello again, Mr Petunia.’ Jackson quickly changed his tone as he reached over and shook hands with Susie’s colleague.

  ‘How did you get on with Hilda Kazinski this afternoon, Susie?’ Mr Petunia asked.

  Jackson instantly felt like a heel. He’d been so busy ogling Susie that he’d completely forgotten she’d spent the better part of the afternoon performing a difficult piece of surgery. He listened to her reply, glad to hear the patient was doing well.

  Moments later they were called in to dinner and Mr Petunia stayed with them as they walked towards their table.

  ‘My wife was going to join me this evening,’ he said as he sat down. ‘But at the last minute my daughter called up to say two of her children were sick and her husband was on night shift. Well, you come from a large family, Susie, so you know what it’s like.’

  ‘Yes, I do.’ She smiled.

  Their table filled up quickly and conversations began to flow. The MC for the evening stood and welcomed everyone. Shortly afterwards, Jackson made yet another short speech, impressing Susie once more with his diversity. For the past three days, he must have seen the same people several times, at lectures, luncheons and dinners. Still, what he was saying was fresh and enjoyable. She admired him and his professionalism. She also noted that when he sat down again, he moved his chair slightly closer to hers.

  Susie tried hard to focus on what Mr Petunia was saying, nodding and smiling politely, all the while unbearably conscious of Jackson. She could feel the pin-pricks of excitement course down her spine, could feel her body crying out for his touch. Her reaction was becoming too intrusive and she sternly told herself to stop it.

  ‘Don’t you agree?’ Mr Petunia was saying, and Susie hadn’t the faintest idea of what he’d been talking about. Once more she’d been so caught up in her awareness of Jackson that her mind seemed unable to function.

  She frowned thoughtfully and said, ‘Hmm.’ And nodded slightly.

  ‘Excuse me,’ Jackson said, and Susie quickly turned to give him her attention. He saw an unmistakable hint of passion reflected in her blue eyes and for a moment he lost his train of thought. His gut twisted with delight and despair. Things were starting to get way out of hand. ‘Ah…’ He frowned and nearly groaned in frustration as her lips parted, her breathing marginally audible as it escaped. He swallowed, watching as her gaze flicked down to his mouth before returning to his eyes.

  His sluggish brain registered that she was waiting for him to speak. Although the looks they’d exchanged seemed to have happened in slow motion, Jackson knew it had only been a few seconds. At least, he hoped it had. Susie had the ability to make him forget all rational thought and in some ways he resented it. No other woman had affected him that way before—not even Alison.

  He cleared his throat. ‘You said there were several videos in the hospital library of other hand reconstruction operations you’ve performed, correct?’

  ‘Yes.’ She nodded her head.

 
‘How long ago did you do them?’

  She thought for a moment, realising that the person on the other side of Jackson was also listening to their conversation. She hoped and prayed that no one could read the emotions in her eyes when she looked at the visiting professor! ‘One was in February this year and the other was July. In both cases, though, we’ve also videoed the follow-up visits, thereby keeping a complete record of any of the after-effects the surgery has had.’

  ‘And you’re planning to use this for a new research project?’

  Susie was surprised. How had Jackson learned about her research plans?

  ‘That’s right. I’m currently putting together a proposal for a new research project and hope to start on that next year.’

  ‘But haven’t the National Health and Medical Research Foundation grants closed for this year?’ the person on the other side of Jackson asked.

  ‘Yes, they have, but as this research directly follows on from my last grant—’

  ‘They view it more as a continuation,’ Jackson finished for her. ‘Well done. So I guess you’ll be wanting to add Hilda Kazinski to the study.’

  ‘Hopefully. I’ll discuss it with her in a few days’ time.’

  ‘Good. Actually, as I have tomorrow evening off, I thought I’d watch them. Do you think the hospital library will let me borrow them?’

  Susie felt the beginning of a smile twitching at her lips. ‘Oh, I’m sure they would.’

  Jackson watched her lips, noticing she was trying to suppress a smile. He glanced over his shoulder to see that the person next to him was now talking to someone else. He returned his attention to Susie. ‘What?’ Even as he asked the question, he could feel the tug of his own lips turning upwards. Her eyes were alive with amusement and his gut twisted again at the sight.