“So this is my fault?” Chase asked, in disbelief.
Lila didn’t answer, so furious she was afraid of what she might say.
They made it to his truck in a flash. The curious eyes of students hit them from every angle. The volleyball game had come to a complete halt, just so the players could watch the two of them. He placed a hand on the small of her back, disarming the truck and opening the passenger door.
“People are looking. Get in before you draw attention to yourself.”
“I don’t give a damn.” Lila glared towards the house. She wanted to go back in and demand to know why Julie had done it. To talk some sense into her, make her understand what a terrible thing she’d done. Julie’s blank face and empty eyes back in that kitchen would infuriate Lila for years to come, she was sure of it.
“You don’t want a million eyes on you while you’re climbing into my truck,” he said, slicing through her anger with sound logic. “People will know we’re together.”
“It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“Of course it matters, baby.”
Any chance she had of making The Safe Space official was as good as dead. Once word got out that Julie had been lying all along, it would give the university all the justification they needed to continue giving Lila the cold shoulder.
She hadn’t realized the truth until that moment. Those girls were all she cared about. She didn’t care about the promotion. She didn’t care about climbing the ladder. She didn’t care if she stayed or went. In fact, at that moment, went was looking pretty damn good.
Her eyes met his. No, she didn’t care about Harvard.
She only cared about those girls.
She only cared about Chase.
“Get in,” he whispered, sighing when she finally allowed him to help her into his truck.
He circled around and climbed into the driver’s seat, starting the car and tearing out of sight.
--
After a long night of ranting and raving, Lila had finally allowed Chase to lay her down and make love to her, washing away the hurt and the anger, even if only for a few hours.
The following morning, she leaned against the door of her office, pushing her body to his, accepting his gentle kisses, and letting his whispered words tickle her lowered eyelashes.
“I love you more than life,” he said, placing his lips against every inch of her face before moving down to her neck, speaking between each kiss he dropped. “I love your passion, your bravery, your fire. I refuse to watch anyone take it away.” He lapped at her neck, pulling her waist to his as his lips trailed down the valley between her breasts. He came down to his knees as he moved lower and lower. “Don’t ever stop fighting, baby.”
Lila breathed deep when he wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his nose into the zipper of her slacks and breathing deep.
“Promise me,” he said, his words muffled.
Lila rolled her eyes with a laugh. “I promise, Chase. Just like I promised last night. I’m not going to give up just because some girl lied to get your attention. Not ever.” Julie had blown up Chase’s phone all night, weeping out her admission when Lila finally forced him to answer it. She said she’d read through the files, all of them, and had been nearly choking on her tears as she apologized profusely for her lies. She’d begged for forgiveness.
There was nothing to forgive. Chase wasn’t angry with Julie, and now, neither was Lila. They just felt sorry for her.
He kissed a trail back up her body until he was standing again, covering her lips with his, and letting them linger. When he pulled back, he placed one hand on the wall over her head and searched her face.
“I’m sorry, baby,” he said, letting his eyes fall. “If I had never brought Julie to you…”
She cupped his cheeks. “Stop.”
“None of this would have ever happened.”
“I said stop. You’re right. This is all your fault. If you hadn’t brought Julie to me, none of this would have happened. I would have never looked into outlets available for her at school, and discovered they didn’t exist. I would have never been driven to start a group where students could come and talk. I would have never discovered that there are dozens of them, and god knows how many more once fall semester starts. I would have never been forced to look inside myself, and find my own truths. The same truths that led me to you.”
His eyes hit hers, filled with emotion.
“Don’t ever be sorry for helping a young woman you thought was in pain. And you damn sure better not ever be sorry for getting the wheels rolling on anything that led me to you. Yes, Julie lied, but maybe it was a blessing in disguise. Maybe it helped me stop…”
His eyebrows jumped. “Pretending?” he offered.
“Hate that word.”
“Love it.”
“Yeah, I know you love it.”
“Not as much as I love you.” He pushed in closer, bending his arm so just his elbow was pressed to the wall. “So you promise you won’t stop? Going to the provost every morning? To the dean every afternoon? To The Safe Space every week?”
“I promise, Chase. I won’t stop.”
“I’m proud of you.”
“Be proud of you. You’re my biggest inspiration, after all.”
His eyes fell to her lips, and he took her waist in his other hand, shaking her. “Call that woman and take the interview with The Post.”
Lila suddenly straightened, groaning softly. She’d decided she wasn’t going to take the interview, and Chase had been fighting tooth and nail ever since she’d let that fact slip from her lips.
This morning, he was still fighting. “You say you don’t care about the promotion anymore, that you don’t even want to work for a school that would turn their back on The Safe Space, that you want to be a champion for this cause. So be the champion you say you want to be. If they’re going to fire you anyway, make damn sure to get the ball rolling somewhere else before they do.”
“Do you know how hard it will be to get another job at another school if I publicly go against the most important institution in the world?”
“Lila, do what you want. Do whatever the hell you want. I’m going to take care of you.” He spoke to her slowly. “How many times do I have to say it?”
Her eyes rose to his. “I’ll think about it--” A knock on the door startled her, and she jumped away from it.
“Good study session, Professor,” Chase said as she opened the door.
Brittney stood on the other side, looking back and forth between them with smiling eyes.
“It was a great session, Mr. Almeida.” Lila’s playful gaze followed him as he moved past Brittany and down the hall, unable to hide her smile, even when she moved her eyes from him.
Brittany stepped into the office with an eyebrow raised high.
Lila closed the door behind her.
“You know that everyone knows, right?” Brittany asked, dropping her book bag on the desk.
Lila moved to her desk chair, plopping down. “Everyone knows what?”
“Everyone knows you two are smashing. It’s all over The Row. The fraternity guys are taking bets on who can land you next.”
Lila sighed. “Fantastic.”
“You really don’t give a fuck, do you? Like, you’re not scared at all. It’s getting to gangster status at this point.”
“Gangster status? Really?”
Brittany began counting off on her fingers. “Um, you went up against the football team… You’re nailing a student… You invaded a sorority house yesterday afternoon…” Brittany had to laugh as she sat on the edge of the desk. “A sorority that houses a student by the name, Julie Barnes?”
“I saw red. I was out of my body.”
“I’m glad you did it. She deserved it. And if Harvard doesn’t grant you tenure, they’re fools. You’ll fit in perfectly with all the batshit professors that roam the halls of this place.”
Lila balled up a piece of paper and threw it at Brittany, smi
ling when she caught it with an adorable giggle. “After what you showed me yesterday, of course I went down there. She’s lucky I didn’t slap the teeth out of her mouth.”
“How have they not fired you, yet?”
“I have no idea.”
Brittany thought on it. “I’m really glad they haven’t.”
“I wish I could agree. Honestly, I’m not even sure if I want this job, or this promotion anymore.” Some part of her thought getting fired would be a relief. It would be a relief to wake up every morning and not have her first thought be of a university of this caliber turning its back on their students. Those thoughts eventually led her to question society as a whole, and how many other people in the world were being blamed instead of listened to. If she didn’t have the feeling of Chase curling in behind her every morning, wrapping her up in his strength, she was sure the dark thoughts would have already swallowed her whole.
She curled her arms around her body, sighing as she imagined they were his.
When the phone rang, Brittany snatched it up.
Lila sputtered, shocked, holding her hands out.
“Professor James’ office,” Brittany answered, giggling at Lila’s stunned face. “One second,” she said, holding the phone out to Lila. “It’s for you.”
“You don’t say,” Lila muttered, snatching the phone. Even as she pretended to be angry, the smile pushing her lips was impossible to fight. “Lila James,” she answered, throwing another balled up piece of paper at Brittany. She suddenly straightened up. “Yes. Alice. Yes, I have been thinking about the article, and I’m still at odds. I know. I know you have a deadline. Yes, I know you flew all the way out here…” Lila sighed, letting the person on the other line speak.
Brittany watched curiously. The conversation went on for a few moments longer, and she raised her eyebrows when Lila hung up.
“Article?” Brittany asked.
Lila threw her hands out, still exasperated from the short exchange with Alice Carmichael, the reporter who’d shown up to her classroom asking to do a piece on her and The Safe Space.
“The Washington Post got wind of The Safe Space, and they want to do a story. Apparently I’m not the first person to make this kind of noise at Harvard.”
“That’s fantastic!”
“I don’t think I’m going to do it.”
Brittany curled her lip. It reminded Lila of Chase. “Why?”
“I’ll be fired in an instant. I can kiss that promotion goodbye.”
“Five minutes ago, you were talking about not giving a shit about the promotion. About how you don’t want anything to do with a school that could turn their back on us the way Harvard has for years.”
“Do I hate this place? Yes. Do I need to keep my electricity running? Yes. I need this job, at least until I can find something else that will pay the bills. I just bought a new house, quitting is not an option, and neither is getting fired.”
“Take the interview.”
“Brittany, I can’t.”
“Trust me. I’m a Mass Media major.”
“Well, if you’re a Mass Media major…” Lila teased.
“There is no outlet more powerful to have on your side than the news media. You can take the interview, postpone it until it comes time for your promotion, and then use it to scare the school into giving you what you want.”
Lila blinked. It was so brilliant that her mind fought for a way to make it less so. She couldn’t think of one. As her stunned eyes rose to Brittany’s, she was reminded this was Harvard. A normal thought to Brittany was a brilliant one to the average person.
Lila didn’t know why these brilliant students kept surprising her with their brilliance, but they always did.
“That’s blackmail,” she said, even as a little man in her head did a happy dance.
“And?” Brittany curled that lip, again. “A university doesn’t get this big without a little corruption going down in the backdrop. By blackmailing them, you’ll officially be speaking their fucked up language.” Brittany rolled her eyes. “It might even get you a real response to the one thing you’ve been asking for since the start of the semester.”
Lila’s eyes bore into Brittany’s, fighting a smile. “You Harvard brood are a bunch of entitled little assholes, but damn if you’re not the most crafty assholes on the planet.”
Brittany raised her chin high. “Thank you, Professor. We are, we really are.”
21
Lila took Brittany’s advice. In what felt like the blink of an eye, her summer class was over, the final manuscript of her book had been submitted, and she found herself sitting in a single chair facing a three-tiered counsel bench. At the bench sat the five stern faces of the ad hoc committee handling her promotion.
On the far end of the stacked podium was Kelly, hands clasped in front of her, blue eyes blazing with nothing but hatred as she directed them at Lila. If anyone on that committee was going to do everything in their power to keep her from getting that promotion, it was Kelly Hannigan.
Four more faculty members, all men, filled the rest of the seats. From grim, to judgmental, to downright bored, their faces told Lila that she was going to have a hell of an hour with these people.
Clearing her throat, she silently thought an hour was way too long. How the hell was she going to survive this? She’d much rather be at home, rolling around in bed with the very man who would seal a ‘no’ vote from this committee today. At least with Chase, her happiness was non-negotiable.
She suddenly felt cold, pulling her blazer around her shoulders.
The committee members had already introduced themselves. The Vice President of the University, who held the highest seat on the podium, had just asked Lila why she thought she deserved the promotion.
“Why do I deserve this promotion?” She breathed in deeply, and thought back to the speech she’d spent all night perfecting with Chase.
She blinked.
Chase.
He’d stayed up with her all night, going over the speech she’d prepared on hundreds of notecards. The guy was pre-med at Harvard. He’d just started his second summer course. He was knee deep in his own work, his own problems, but he’d chosen to work with her all night, until neither of them could keep their eyes open for another moment.
Later that night, after making passionate love, he’d whispered to her that he hoped she got the promotion today. That being her dirty little secret was a small price to pay to see her get what she deserved. That if Harvard let her slip through their fingers, they were the biggest idiots in the world.
She could still hear the sweet deepness of his voice. Still feel the tips of his fingers running along her naked body before they’d both drifted off to sleep.
Something clicked in Lila.
“Why do I deserve this promotion?” she asked. “Before I answer that question, you should know a few things about me.” Her eyes went from one member to the next, holding eye contact with each one. She zeroed in on the Vice President, holding up her pointer finger. “One, I’m sleeping with a student. His name is Chase Almeida. Before you check your files, allow me to save you some time. Sleeping with a student is not against university policy, but it is frowned upon. I’ve been encouraged to keep the fact that I’m sleeping with this student quiet. To sweep it under the proverbial Harvard rug. Unfortunately, that rug is already overflowing, and frankly, I’ve never been one to go along with the grain.”
She saw the Vice President’s mouth drop open just before her eyes moved to the man next to him, Dean of The Harvard School of Arts and Sciences, Dr. Allan M. Brandt.
He was middle-aged with gray hair and kind brown eyes. He was the man that had given her this job in the first place. Her interview with him a year ago had ended with her in hysterical tears, so he didn’t appear nearly as shocked by her admission as the Vice President. In fact, he seemed highly amused.
Lila had a sneaking suspicion that her tendency to come completely undone at a moment’s notice was the f
acet of her personality that Dr. Brandt enjoyed most.
“Two,” she continued. “I’ve gone against this university, on more than one occasion, to advocate for victims of sexual assault on campus. I was told to ignore these victims. Three, The Washington Post recently knocked on my classroom door asking for an interview about the lack of resources for abuse victims on campus. I haven’t taken that interview, but I haven’t turned it down either.”
The moment those words left her mouth, Dr. Brandt gave her the tiniest nod, noticeable only to her, and winked.
Lila sat taller and moved her eyes to Kelly. “And, finally, four.” She held up four fingers. “I’m pretty much the most screwed up human being you will ever meet in your life. That I will never refute. But I know my work. Even more than that, I know my passion. I have a passion for helping students who are lost, and this university is severely lacking in that regard. As long as I’m employed here, I will never stand idly by and allow that to continue. I will make as much noise as humanly possible, and I will never, ever apologize for it. Never. So those are a few things about me. Anything else you need to know, well, it’s right there in my file. I’m sure you all have a copy of it.” She breathed deep. “Oh, and I was also arrested before the start of the semester. Drunk and disorderly misconduct. So… Not sure if that’s in my files…” She motioned to the files, letting her voice fade off.
A silence passed, but Lila noticed that all five committee members had straightened up. They no longer looked grim, or judgmental, or even remotely bored. They’d been waiting for her to spout some bullet-point list of all her wonderful attributes and accomplishments. What they’d gotten instead had struck them speechless.
Not surprisingly, Kelly was the first to find words to speak. “And why in the world would we grant you this promotion, knowing you’ve got an interview pending with The Washington Post? An interview that is sure to paint the university in a terrible light?”
Lila smirked. “I’m sorry, I should have made myself clearer.” Her eyes traveled the table. “Unless the ball starts rolling on the one thing I’ve ever asked for from this university--a real, tangible resource for students to come and talk about their hurt, and their pain, without being put on a three-week waiting list, I don’t give a damn about this promotion.”
Thunder Rolls (The Almeida Brothers Trilogy Book 2) Page 30