Vision of Secrets

by Entranced Publishing

  “Any idea what it’s waiting for?”

  I shrugged. I had a few ideas, but I didn’t want to say.

  “So the next day was your birthday?”

  “Yeah,” I said. “Big whoop.”

  “Bristol,” Mary said. “It’s not every day that you turn seventeen. Certainly you had a celebration.”

  “You want to hear about my birthday?” I said.

  Mary nodded. “Yes, I would.”

  * * * *

  I got up and looked around for my mom and dad, but I was alone in the apartment we shared. Jerry popped in while I was in the shower.

  “What are you doing?” I yelled.

  “Sorry,” he said, his hand over his eyes. “I saw you looking for your parents. They left a note. It’s tacked on the fridge.”

  “I’ll look when I’m dressed,” I said. “Could you get out?”

  “Yeah,” he said. “It’s just that I always sang in the shower and…”

  I threw a bar of soap that went right through his head.

  “Okay,” he said. “Alright. I’m going.”

  I watched as he disappeared but not before peeking through his fingers.

  Jerry was gone by the time I was dressed. I prayed that meant he had finally moved on, but somehow I knew better.

  When I was dressed, I went out to the kitchen. There was a pile of mail on the counter and a small package address to me. I opened it up and found a birthday card with a cute little dog on it. It made me smile. It was from Uncle Mark. There was a gift there too. It was a pair of earrings. Nothing fancy but pretty. They had butterflies on them.

  Next, I went to the fridge and found the note my parents had left.

  Bristol,

  Your father is going out of town tonight. I’ve got a late meeting and then I’m seeing some friends. We’ll probably won’t see you until after the weekend. Order pizza, I left money.

  Mom.

  I looked around to see if there was another note, or a card, or something else that would show either of them had even remembered today was my birthday, but there was no other sign.

  I wanted to grab the note and rip it to little pieces, but I didn’t know if I’d have time. If I did, I’d probably yell and maybe cry. I would be a mess and would have to go freshen up.

  Instead I pushed it to the back of my mind, grabbed my bag, and left for school. On the bus, I pulled off the earrings I had originally put on and replaced them with the butterfly ones my uncle had sent. At least someone on this planet knew it was my birthday today.

  Anyone who saw me on the bus would have seen your typical teenage girl. But inside, there was a little girl, crying.

  * * * *

  I didn’t see Jerry as I made my way to school, which was good since I was in no mood to deal with him. I looked for Brady, but I didn’t see him around. I made my way to class but was distracted by a girl named Holly. She was passing in and out of rooms, letting students pass right through her and waving at me.

  Holly was a ghost that has been here since I first arrived. She had been killed about two years before I started here, while I was still in middle school. She was a senior who had been texting and driving when she wrapped her car around a guardrail on the Belt Parkway. That hadn’t stopped Holly from gossiping. Especially once I was around and able to actually hear her.

  She came up to me as I was shoving things into my locker.

  “Ooh,” She said. “I’ve got so much to tell you. That girl Angela I was telling you about? Well, she didn’t break up with her boyfriend like I thought she would. Instead, she just screwed his best friend. She figured if he could do it with hers, why not? I mean, like LOL, how stupid is that? Oh and I heard that girl Jen, the girl with the reddish hair? She’s talking to some guy online named Jason. She was showing his picture before. OMG, he’s so adorable. I don’t know what he sees in her. And did you see Melissa Harkin today? What was she wearing? She’s such a slut.”

  I rolled my eyes as I listened to her prattle on and on. God help me, she was making me miss Jerry. I wanted to tell her to get lost, but this was all she had and it wasn’t like it was doing any harm. Nobody could hear the gossip she was spreading except me. She was like my personal TMZ.

  That’s when I got an idea. I went in to a nearby bathroom, hoping Holly would follow me. She did. She kept talking about what she saw in the boys’ locker room—who was big, bigger, biggest and who had a small one—while I fidgeted with my bag, waiting for the bathroom to empty. When the last girl ran to get to class, I turned to Holly and shushed her.

  “That’s all fascinating,” I said, keeping my tone friendly. “But let me ask you a question. There’s this kid in my history class. His name is Brady. He wears a hoodie. Any idea who he is?”

  Holly thought about it a moment. “Dark hair, looks like his own personal dark cloud hovering above his head? Yeah, I’ve seen him. Really, Bristol, you could do so much better than him.”

  “I’m not interested in him like that,” I said. “And I doubt he’s interested in me like that. I just want to know what his story is. Any chance you could find out?”

  Holly practically beamed. “I can’t make any promises. It’s hard to get info when nobody is talking about him, but I’ll see what I can do. Nice earrings, by the way.”

  She was gone before I had a chance to say thanks. I left and headed for class. Throughout the day, nobody wished me a happy birthday, which I suppose is my own fault. I can’t ever remember telling anyone when my birthday was.

  I thought about telling someone that not only was it my birthday, but that my parents would be out of town for the next few days. I could throw a party, and as long as it didn’t get to out of control, nobody would even know.

  But it wouldn’t be worth it just so I didn’t have to spend the weekend alone. I didn’t feel like spending the day with anyone from school.

  Besides, I didn’t want to have to listen to Mrs. Reid from down the hall lecture me about what was wrong with teenagers these days. Not again. She could go on and on. Not that she would tell my parents. She couldn’t, since she had died seven years ago, but that hadn’t stopped her from popping in on me whenever she thought I was up to no good.

  After lunch, I went to the ladies room, where once again, I heard the vocal styling’s of Jerry. I considered flushing myself down the toilet. Unfortunately, I wasn’t alone in there.

  Michelle Molloy came in to fluff, or whatever it is you call what she does. Michelle was a junior like me. She was dating the high school football quarterback and had him wrapped around her finger.

  I had heard stories, mostly from Holly, that Michelle liked to play pranks on anyone that she didn’t deem cool enough. And if anyone stood up to her, she’d sic he big boyfriend on them. I didn’t know if it was true or not. While we knew each other, she and I never spent any real time together.

  “Hey, Bristol,” she said as we stood by the sink. “Ooh.” She looked over at me. “Those are pretty.” She looked at my ears. “And new—I haven’t seen them on you before. New boyfriend?”

  I shook my head. “My uncle gave them to me.”

  She nodded and reached out to examine them. As she did, her finger grazed my ear.

  My world shifted and I saw her laughing with friends on the school steps as she watched some video on her phone.

  “I never get tired of watching her wait there,” Michelle said. “Then get that text telling her that he didn’t want to meet her because she’s such a slut. It’s priceless.”

  Someone came running up to them. A short blonde girl I knew as Kara. “Oh my God, you have to get rid of that now.”

  Michelle looked at her like she had ten heads. “Why should I? It’s hilarious. Do you see the look on Jen’s face when she got my text and—”

  “Get rid of it,” Kara repeated. “And erase the texts. I heard the teachers are on the warpath about it.”

  “Why?” Michelle said. “What do they care?”

  “Jen’s dead,” Kara repli
ed. “She went home that night and hung herself. I’m telling you, get rid of the evidence now.”

  Before Michelle could respond, I felt myself pulled back to the here and now.

  “You ok?” Michelle asked. She was staring at me.

  “Um, yeah,” I said. “Listen Michelle, I heard something to other day that you were planning on pulling some sort of prank on a girl named Jen.”

  “Really?” Michelle said. “Who’s been talking behind my back?”

  “I don’t know,” I said. “I overheard something earlier. Listen, if it’s the Jen I’m thinking of, maybe you shouldn’t. I’ve also heard she’s depressed and I wouldn’t want her to get embarrassed and do something like hurt herself.”

  Michelle gasped. “Oh no, you don’t think she’d really…. Oh no, you’re right. What was I thinking? Thanks.” Michelle quickly left, passing right though Jerry on her way out.

  “She just rolled her eyes as she left,” Jerry said. “So I don’t think that she’s going to listen.”

  “Neither do I,” I said.

  * * * *

  “You could have gone to the school,” Mary said.

  I shrugged. “I know. I thought about it, but they would have asked the same questions. Who I heard it from. Besides, something was telling me not to.”

  “Something?”

  “Yeah,” I said. “You know. I’m a freak, remember?”

  “Bristol,” Mary said. “I wish you wouldn’t think of yourself that way. I know being so different can’t be easy, but there’s nothing wrong with you. I’ll bet if you told your parents, they’d understand.”

  I rolled my eyes. “That would be a bet you’d lose.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  I shook my head. I didn’t really want to go there, but Mary wouldn’t let this go.

  “When I was little,” I explained, “I had this dream that my teacher was going to die. He’d grab his chest in the middle of a spelling lesson and keel over right in front of the class. I had just turned six. I told my parents that I didn’t want to go to school that day that something bad was going to happen.”

  “But they made you go anyway,” Mary finished as if she understood. “Bristol, you were six. Kids have bad dreams. They had no way of knowing.”

  “They didn’t make me go to school that day,” I said, surprising Mary. To be honest, I surprised myself by telling her. “In fact, both my parents took the day off from work. We made a day of it. We went to the park, saw a movie, went to the zoo. Lots of fun things. It was a great day. In fact, it was the last time I can ever remember having fun with Mom and Dad.”

  “It sounds like a lot of fun,” Mary said.

  “It was,” I said. “I even forgot about my teacher. But I was getting tired and I actually begged my parents to go home. We did.”

  The silence hung in the air for a moment. I almost told her I didn’t want to finish. Then I gave in.

  “When we got home,” I said, “the answering machine was full of messages. One parent after another talking about what happened and how horrible it was. Dad looked like he was in a panic, pacing back and forth. Mom just listened to each message, but I could tell she was pissed. One woman left a message that said, ‘Thank God Bristol wasn’t in today to see what happened.’ I rolled my eyes,” I continued. “And I said, ‘I did too see what happened. I just saw it last night in a dream like usual.’”

  Mary waited a moment, but I was silent. “What happened?”

  I dried a tear that was rolling down my cheek. I felt like such an idiot here. “Mom slapped my face,” I said. “She’d never hit me before. And she hasn’t since. Just that one time. And she said, ‘Don’t ever talk like that again, or people will think you’re a freak!’ I looked to Dad, but he was too upset to defend me. I ran to my room. The next day, Mom and Dad pretended that nothing unusual had happened, but they were distant. Dad didn’t smile and make silly little jokes. Mom didn’t smile and hug me. It was like living with strangers.”

  “How long has that lasted?” Mary asked.

  “Going on eleven years now,” I said. “Can I talk about something else? Please?”

  Mary nodded. “You said you had a feeling that going to the school wasn’t the best thing to do. What did you do?”

  “I waited,” I said. “I listened to Jerry belt out that song over and over again until Holly came and found me.”

  * * * *

  “I think I know who you’re talking about,” Holly said. “His name is Brady Lowell. I heard one of his teachers talking about it. He wasn’t in last year on this day, but he didn’t bring a note. They were going to ride him, but that someone told that teacher that today is the day his mom died in a car accident and he always went to see her. I’ll bet he’s there now.”

  I nodded. “Makes sense,” I said under my breath. “I have another problem.”

  I told Holly about what happened with Michelle.

  “She’s is such a bitch,” Holly said with relish. “Poor Jen. She’s always been too shy to even talk to a boy. I heard Michelle telling Jen this morning that she should offer to meet the boy at the food court and bring their relationship to ‘the next level.’ Of course, Jen didn’t like the sound of that, but Michelle convinced her that if she didn’t say that, the boy would think it’s just to be friends. And the next level for them was just meeting face to face.”

  “Great,” I said. “I guess I’m going to the mall.”

  Holly pouted. “I miss the mall so much.”

  However, Holly didn’t follow me. I never saw her anywhere but school. Some ghosts are tied to a location. I wish I could say the same for Jerry, but he tagged along. Now, not only was he singing, he was dancing as well. If you can call it that. I never realized that even ghosts could have two left feet.

  I took the bus to the mall, but halfway there I noticed a woman. She was in her early forties, wearing a pretty flower dress and smiling at me. I nearly asked her if she knew me when some guy walked right through her.

  She got off at a stop around the corner from where I needed to go, so I followed her. We were right by a cemetery. Believe it or not, ghosts don’t go to those very often, but this one did. She never said anything, so I just followed. About two minutes later, I realized where we were going.

  Brady was standing by the foot of a grave, crying. I approached him just as it started to rain lightly.

  “I’m so sorry,” he said. “I wish you could forgive me.”

  “Brady?” I said. “Are you ok?”

  Brady jumped at the sound of his name.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

  He quickly wiped his tears away. “It’s ok. What are you doing here, Bristol?”

  “I need to get to the mall,” I said. “I got off at the wrong stop.”

  “Not by much,” he said. “You can cut through the cemetery and get there.”

  I nodded and looked at the grave. “Your mom?”

  He nodded just as there was a load clap of thunder.

  “Listen,” I said. “Could you show me the way? I don’t want to get lost. It’s important. Besides, it’s raining. You’re not going to stay out here.”

  Brady looked like that’s exactly what he planned, but he decided against it. “Sure,” he said. “C’mon.”

  I followed Brady through the grounds of the cemetery until we came out on the other side. The mall was down one more block and across the street.

  “Come with me,” I said. “Stay out of the rain. I’ll buy you dinner to say thanks.”

  Reluctantly, Brady agreed. We headed in and went to the food court. We both just decided on a slice of pizza and sat down with each other.

  “Did I know your mom?” I asked.

  Brady shrugged. “Maybe. She worked at the school.”

  I looked over and saw his mom watching us.

  “So look,” I said. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I heard you say something at your mom’s grave. What did you mean?”
>
  Brady didn’t answer. He just stared at his pizza.

  “It can help to talk you know,” I said.

  That earned me a very sad smile. “You sound like my mom,” Brady said. “She was a counselor for the high school.”

  “Well then,” I said. “She’d want you to talk.”

  Brady laughed. “You really are like her. She could usually tell when someone was upset just by looking at them.” He hesitated a little more, but he finally started to talk. “It’s stupid,” Brady said. “My mom was killed in a car accident a couple of years ago. We were in the car together. On our way here, in fact.”

  “Oh I’m sorry,” I said.

  “It’s okay,” Brady said. “The thing is, I was complaining about the fact that she had taken away my video games because my grades had dropped. I was really upset and riding her. If I hadn’t….” He stopped talking.

  “What happened?”

  Brady sighed. “A car came out of nowhere and hit us. I was in the back, on the opposite side. Mom was killed instantly. It was the other guy’s fault. He was drunk, but if Mom hadn’t been listening to me bug her about some stupid video game—”

  “Brady,” I said. I put my hand on his and got a flash that put everything together for me. “You can’t think like that. It wasn’t your fault. Your mom wouldn’t want you to blame yourself.”

  “I know,” Brady said. “You want to hear something really screwed up? I’m always showing up here to ask for her forgiveness. I don’t even play those stupid video games. I don’t hang out with friends. I don’t ask girls out on dates. I just wait for some sign that she’s forgiven me. I keep going to that grave hoping she’ll find some way of giving me a sign. Funny, huh. Like she can hear me or find a way to let me know.”