Ghostface Killer ~ M. Never

by Never, M.

  “I don’t think it’s always bad.” He reaches behind him, sliding his hand under the couch where I can’t see.

  My immediate response is suspicion.

  Apprehensively, I watch as he produces . . . a bottle of lubrication.

  I frown. “How long has that been stashed under there?”

  “Since I bought it.”

  I know exactly when he bought it. He placed it on the kitchen island a week ago when he went into town for groceries. I asked him what it was for, and he didn’t pull any punches. Baz told me point blank, “Anal sex.”

  I played off the stress the term induced. I didn’t want him knowing exactly how uncomfortable the thought of back door booty makes me. Not many things rattle me, but that definitely does.

  “If you want to worship in the forbidden temple, you have to prove yourself worthy.” It was a total bullshit line. I just wanted to avoid talking about the topic altogether, so I put the groceries away, grabbed the clothes he bought me, and vacated the kitchen.

  Baz never made his fandom of anal sex a secret, and he definitely has an interest in getting in me. And, I’m sure if my past was different, there would be no issue. We’d probably have done it already. But my steadfast reluctance has prevented it. Baz tests the waters every now and again, but I always shut him down. It’s just a wall I can’t scale. It brings back too many horrific memories.

  “Is this your subtle way of blindsiding me?”

  “Sort of. But this isn’t what I meant to grab.” He tosses the plastic bottle onto the rug. I arch an inquisitive brow.

  He reaches under the couch again and this time produces something entirely different. “Ah, there, that’s what I meant to get.” He holds his hand open, and in the middle of his palm is a little black box. I stall as I stare at it.

  “How did you confuse plastic with velvet?” It’s a stupid, knee-jerk response, because I am definitely blindsided now.

  “I didn’t. The lube was just a segue.”

  “Segue?” I never take my eyes off the pretty velvet box with a jeweled button on top.

  “To hopefully proving myself worthy.”

  Oh, my God, he took me seriously. “You’re giving me jewelry to worm your way into my ass?”

  “This isn’t just jewelry.” Baz scoots closer and takes my wrist. “This is . . .” The sentence lingers between us. “All my fears and all my pain given a purpose. You shot me through the heart the first night I met you. And you have been dragging me around helplessly by the arrow ever since.” He places the box in my hand. “I’m your kill, Stevie, and you are my quiet.”

  I gape at his choice words. My kill. My unintentional, figurative kill.

  “You don’t have to say anything now. I don’t need an answer. I know it’s fast, but I want to be worthy. I want you to know that I’m committed to you. To both of you.”

  My gaze jumps between Baz’s sincere green eyes and the intimidating black box. What did I say about not many things scaring me?

  My heart is hammering, and every word is echoing in my head like it’s as vast as the Grand Canyon. I’ve just been completely blindsided, and I have no idea what to do.

  “Wow. You really go all out for anal.” I spew random words because I think I’m in shock.

  “I think we both know this is about way more than anal.” Baz pouts his lips and unsnaps the button on the box. “But if it leads down that road, I wouldn’t be opposed.” Of course not. “Besides, you were the one who told me you liked it dirty. What’s more dirty than that?” He opens the tabs of the box and reveals the dazzling ring sitting inside. All the air in my lungs disappears as I admire the biggest diamond and the most ornate setting I have ever seen.

  “How many marriage proposals include anal sex, do you think?” I ask as my eyes glide over the curved pavé band. The tiny diamonds blazing orange from the reflection of the fire.

  “I’m thinking none but mine.” Baz laughs as he removes the ring from the box. “But we are definitely one of a kind.”

  “That’s true.” I shake as he slides the ring onto my third finger. I know you’re supposed to describe engagement rings as beautiful, elegant, or fancy, but this isn’t any of those things. It’s completely unique and completely bad-ass. The band hugs my finger like a serpent, it’s pointed tail reaching all the way to my knuckle. The diamond at the base is a huge, glittery circle. Wow. It’s so large I’m pretty sure I could knock someone out with it. And if I didn’t know any better, I’d think that was Baz’s intention.

  I know he said I didn’t need to answer now. I know he understands this is all so fast, and we should really take our time. We’re still getting to know each other. Still growing accustomed to being in each other’s lives. Our current circumstance is rocky. There’s no solid ground. Every day is a risk. Another twenty-four hours of the unknown. But being with Baz makes the risk all worth it. I never dreamed about a happily ever after. The bad guy doesn’t get those. And I’m most definitely one of the bad guys. But as much as Baz tries to convince me he is too, it’s just not true. He’s one of the good ones. And if anyone deserves a happy ending, deserves to just simply be happy, it’s him. I stare into the eyes that speared my heart with just one look, and I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, what my answer is. I don’t need time. I just need Baz.

  “Yes.” I launch into his arms and tackle him to the floor.

  “Whoa.” He wraps me in a strong embrace.

  “I don’t need time. I just need you,” I vocalize my thoughts.

  Baz’s smile as he looks up at me is dazzling. It’s warm and genuine and full of love. Full of joy. Just like my heart.

  This ice queen’s emotions have finally thawed from their arctic prison. I feel human again. Not a ghost who’s invisible. Who’s untouchable. Who’s nonexistent.

  Baz makes me real.

  I smash my lips against his, expressing the outpour of emotions that are uncontainable. The feelings I can’t verbally express. He hugs me tighter, accepting everything I have to give. Moaning into my mouth, he clutches my head as our hips begin to grind of their own accord. The physical desire is never far. It’s forged within our foundation. And it undeniably rules.

  “You are worthy,” I declare between scorching hot kisses. “And you can have me any way you want me.” I’m unsure what propels me to make the spontaneous decision. Maybe it’s because I know Baz will never hurt me. It will be a completely different experience. And I want him to own me. Every single part of me. Especially that part. I want him to erase the past and sketch a new future. Embed new associations and feelings. I don’t want to have to say no to him, ever.

  “Stevie, that’s not what this whole thing is about,” he disputes.

  “Yes, it is. It’s exactly what it’s about. No walls. No fears. No regrets. Nothing standing between us. I want you to be able to have me however you want me.” He runs his knuckles along my cheek as he regards me thoughtfully. I know he’s questioning my decision. My sudden change of tune. He doesn’t want anything to happen for the wrong reasons. “I want to give this part of myself to you. Only you.”

  “How can I deny a heartfelt plea like that?”

  “You can’t.” I grin as I press my lips to his.

  “You’re right. I can’t.” He glides his hands south and palms my ass, squeezing my cheeks so hard I squeak as he presses his growing erection between my legs. “I wanted inside that hot hole the first night we were together, and not a damn thing has changed.” Baz locks his arm around my waist and anchors me to his body as he repositions us on the floor. I cling to him as he sets me on my back and rests on top of me. “I’m going to make you feel so good, Stevie. I’m going to make you love it.” He darts his tongue out, swiping it across my pouty bottom lip before running it over my jaw and down my neck. Just before he passes my collarbone, I catch his face in my hands.

  “Baz.” I suck in a shaky breath, and he looks up at me. “Just don’t ask me to scream.”

  Baz pushes up on his arms, hi
s green gaze beating down on my face. Concern, confusion, anger, and resistance swirl in his irises.

  “Stevie, maybe we shouldn’t—”

  “We definitely should.” I place my fingertips over his mouth. “I’ll tell you everything tomorrow. I don’t want to ruin anything tonight. I just want to be with you.” I inhale, cleansing my muddy lungs with oxygen. “Just you.”

  Securing a piece of long, stray hair behind his ear, I wait patiently as the questions cycle through Baz’s mind. I see them all. What happened? What aren’t you telling me? Who hurt you? Can I fucking kill him?

  He’s too late for the last one.

  “Baz,” I implore, my insides strumming from just his body heat alone. “Make me feel good.”

  His lids lower. I uttered the magic words. “You fight dirty, Stevie James.”

  “I know.” I gasp as he traps one of my nipples in his mouth. He can’t resist when I ask for something so pleasure-seeking. Something that will satisfy us both. Because Baz enjoys making me come just as much as I enjoy coming.

  “Tomorrow.” Baz bites my over-sensitized nipple, and I jolt. “You tell me everything.” I nod my head sluggishly, half-drunk with desire.

  Baz spends a few more minutes plucking my nipples between his teeth before moving down my torso. He kisses an S shape over my ribs then a heart around my navel. My chest pinches from the overly sweet gesture. But that’s Baz. Thoughtful, sweet, protective, intense. He has so many layers. And I love every single one of them.

  Baz emits a half-groan, half-hum, all-male sound as his mouth reaches my lips. I’m damp from the foreplay, and he’s fully aware. He doesn’t even bother to tease me; he just buries his head between my thighs and unleashes his tongue.

  God! I bow up in pure bliss as he wrenches my legs farther apart and explores every exposed inch of me. The throb starts in my core and with every pulse works its way out further and further until I feel it in my fingertips, in my curling toes, and all my straining muscles.

  “Hands above your head, baby.” He sucks hard on my clit, snapping his head as he pulls the piece of pink flesh between his lips.

  “Fuck!” I arch as I throw my hands over my head, the bearskin rug soft against my knuckles.

  “I want you to come, Stevie. Just like this.” He slides one finger into my wet entrance as he continues to assail my tender bud. He pumps his hand, the dual sensation sending me soaring. I feel him spread the wetness all over my crease, coating the second opening with layers of arousal. The pounding of my heart is like a sledgehammer as I feel him brush against the tight, tense muscle. I talk myself off the ledge at the same time I’m about to swan dive off it. This is Baz. He won’t hurt me.

  The push and pull of my trust, of my willingness, has me walking a fiery high wire. I want this with him. I want everything with him.

  Baz inserts his finger into my pussy at the perfect angle just as my clit aches. It’s like thunder suddenly claps inside me, and I come. I propel a scream into the air, and I climax, Baz using my

  moment of weakness to breach the doorway of the forbidden temple. I wasn’t expecting it, and through the rush of the orgasm, it didn’t hurt like I was expecting it would. Like I was prepared for. But Baz is gentle. He takes his time. I’m completely soaked, so his finger glides easily through the taut hole.

  Disgusting memories of the past try to invade, but I push them away. I don’t want what happened then to affect what’s happening now.

  Baz continues his slow assault, licking and kissing my clit the entire time. I hiss when his entire finger makes its way inside. The muscle burning as it stretches little by little.

  “Just relax, baby,” he coos, continuously pumping his wrist. When my body finally becomes accustomed to one finger, he adds a second.

  “Baz,” I keen as he presses on, adding more pressure to my pussy with his mouth, while using both his tongue and the pad of his thumb to massage the throbbing bundle of nerves.

  “Come again. Just like this.”

  “I . . . I . . .” I huff, stiffening as he forces the pleasure on me, relentless with his fingers and tongue. “Baz.”

  “C’mon, baby, come. With my fingers inside all of you.” He slides his thumb down my crease and inserts it into my entrance. I shiver uncontrollably as my body is filled, wholly and completely.

  “Holy shit!” My voice is a crushed whisper as I writhe. I’m so full, so stimulated, I couldn’t stop the slaughter even if I tried.

  Baz sucks on my clit, fingers my pussy, and stretches my ass all at the same time, and I literally black out when I come. It’s a complete and total meltdown of body and mind. I don’t know how long the shudders last, but my limbs are limp and heavy by the time I’m able to flutter my eyes open. I’m so . . . so . . . I don’t even know how to explain it. Serene? No, placid. Relaxed. Putty. That’s what I am, I’m putty.

  I feel Baz smile against my hip. “I’m going to smell like you for a week.” He sounds overly pleased.

  I grunt, unable to form words at the moment.

  “Stevie, take a deep breath,” he warns. I do, barely, and as I inhale, he works a third finger into my ass.

  “Shit, that hurts.” The snap of pain kills my buzz. I’m so fucking full it feels like my muscles can’t elasticize another inch.

  “I’m sorry.” He drops kisses down my slit and lays his head on my thigh. “But I need you to be loose.” He stretches the three fingers buried inside me outward, and I moan in painful pleasure. “My cock barely fit’s in your pussy, and I want every inch of it in your ass.”

  The thought of Baz’s long, fat cock makes me stress.

  “Don’t tense. Stay relaxed.” He licks me leisurely. Long, slow, lazy strokes over my clit and through my folds.

  This man and his mouth are a lethal combination.

  Baz continues to stretch me until his fingers move freely against the muscle. It hurts and it doesn’t. The bouts of pleasure chase away the waves of pain.

  The gravelly, gruff sounds starting to vibrate from Baz alert me he’s ready for more. Ready for the next level.

  “I can’t stand it anymore, Stevie. I need to be inside you.” He rises to his knees with a possessed look in his eye. It’s similar to the look he first had when I woke up in this cabin. But it’s nowhere near as dangerous or worrisome. It’s driven by heroin-pure lust, voracious need, and unbridled want.

  He doesn’t withdraw his hand as he grabs for the lube bottle. He handles it awkwardly as he’s not a lefty, but manages to pop the top and slather the clear, slick substance all over his cock. It’s like a steel rod protruding from between his legs. Unbendable and unforgiving.

  We both breathe raggedly but for different reasons.

  Baz finally withdraws his fingers, and I feel the muscles of my ass immediately contract. Shit.

  “Stevie, stay with me.” He must see the apprehension on my face. “We’ll go slow, baby.” He places his hands on my knees as our eyes connect. I nod. I trust him.

  He pushes my legs up and out, drawing my butt slightly off the floor. “Hold yourself like this.”

  I wrap my hands around my shins and stay in place, intoxicated butterflies in my stomach and a flock of drunk birds in my chest.

  Baz grips his slippery length and guides the head to my stretched entrance. “Breathe baby, I want you to breathe with me.” He covers my body with his, supporting himself on one arm. I feel the tip nudge against my rosebud, and I hold my breath. “Look at me, Stevie. Don’t take your eyes off me.” He pushes in, and the breach takes me by surprise. The head slides in easily. Way easier than I expected.

  I release the air I’m holding hostage as Baz works his way inside. It’s a slow, drawn-out process.

  Baz is shaking, fighting the urge to plow right into me. His cock hurts way more than his fingers, but it isn’t unbearable. Not like before. Not like when I was forced. I shake the thought out of my mind and stay with Baz.

  “Shit, you’re so fucking tight.” He drops his head once he’s
halfway inside.

  “And you’re so big.”

  “You’re good for my ego, baby.” His entire body is strung tight, like he’s petrified in a plank position.

  I don’t know when or how the tables suddenly turn, but once he’s almost completely buried, my unease turns into impatience.

  “Baz.” I fidget beneath him, running my hands crazily over his shoulders and down his back. Scratching my nails into skin as I gyrate my hips.

  “Am I hurting you?” Baz pauses.

  “No,” I force out. “I want you. More of you. Now.” I clasp his neck rigidly.

  He lowers his chest to kiss me, claiming my mouth while he grabs under my right knee. Pushing forward, lifting my ass into the air more than it already is, he gives in, thrusting his cock the rest of the way.

  I scream into his mouth, and we both freeze. It didn’t exactly hurt, but it wasn’t pleasant either. We pant in tandem, nose to nose, chest to chest, linked in the most biblical way.

  “You’re fucking killing me. You feel so goddamn good.”

  His cock twitches, and the sensation resonates through my entire body.

  “Move,” I urge.

  “I’m not going to last. I’m going to blow a load more catastrophic than the Hindenburg.”

  “I can withstand it. Move, Baz, please just move.”

  He complies, lifting his hips, easing in and out of me.

  “Holy fuck.” It’s so raw. So visceral. Of all the ways we’ve fucked, this is the most primal. The most primitive. The most intrinsic.

  Baz grunts barbarically as he moves, vicious, ferocious. It’s brutal, but a beautiful brutal. I rip out the elastic that is barely securing his hair and knot my fingers in the long, chestnut brown strands.

  I hold on tight as we hit a stride, undulating against each other, using the sweat and friction of our skin as we seek out our release like bloodthirsty beasts.

  Everything below my waist constricts as Baz’s pelvis persistently scrapes against my clit. A storm is coming.

  “Shit, so tight.” Baz feels my muscles lock down. “Stevie, come. You have to fucking come while I’m inside you. I want to feel it. I need to feel it,” he chokes out, pumping harder. The all-consuming urge has finally taken control.