by Lucia Franco
I rolled onto my back and held my ankle until I rolled onto my knees and tried to force myself to stand quickly to roll it off my back, like nothing happened. I held my breath. No tears fell. I wouldn't let them, because I knew if I did, I would lose everything, and I wouldn't be able to stop.
Kova came running onto the floor and I eyed him with disgust and disappointment. He tried to help me stand, but I brushed him away. He tried again.
"Ria," he said low, trying to help, gathering me into his arms.
"Get the hell away from me," I nearly cried and pushed his hands away. "I'm fine."
"Please," he begged, trying to lift me. "Let me help you."
"Help me?" I said, scoffing sarcastically. I stood up, unable to make eye contact with him. Pushing back the tears, I choked out, "You've done plenty."
I limped off the floor toward the exit, but the only way to leave was to pass Katja. I exhaled a sigh and put on a façade of happiness and made my way into the lobby.
I'd never been so terrified in my life to meet someone face-to-face. I knew, deep down in my gut, I knew Katja knew the truth. There was no denying it.
"Congrats, Katja," I bit out with a cheerful smile while balancing on one foot.
"Spasibo," she responded, her eyes twinkling.
Thank you. I deciphered that one. I smiled again and went to walk past her.
"You know, Konstantin wanted to keep it between us for the past couple of months, but I could not wait any longer," she said exuberantly. "I just wanted to shout it from the top of my lungs."
"The past couple of months?" I asked against my better judgment. I had to hear it from the horse's mouth.
"Yes, did you not know?" she said, one brow raised, eyes boring into mine. "Konstantin asked me to be his wife forever. When I said yes, he couldn't wait, and made me his wife the very next day."
I tilted my head to the side…waiting…dying…until it slammed into me. Kova was married the week he was supposedly sick.
Vodka cures what medication cannot, he had said. I figured he was one of those people, like my dad, who didn't believe in medicine and drank his sickness away.
But he wasn't sick. He was getting married and drinking his way through it. No wonder he was so dressed up in the pictures he texted me. I firmly believed that now.
"We married two months ago," she stated. I didn't like the way she looked at me. The gaze in her eyes was too vindictive, like she knew something I didn't know.
Two months.
Two. Months. Ago. Kova married Katja.
I closed my eyes. God, I could barely breathe. The pain slicing me wide open hurt so bad.
Kova and Katja were married two months ago. I couldn't get that number out of my head. Two months ago he slipped a ring on her finger and promised to be faithful to her for the rest of his life, then last night he made love to me and came inside me.
I balanced on one foot, the tips of my toes on the other. I was going to be sick. There were too many opportunities in the last couple months for him to tell me he was fucking married.
Swallowing back my emotions, I quickly glanced at Kova then back at Katja with a straight face. I had to act like it wasn't a big deal. So I put on a sunny smile while my heart was breaking. I had to pretend it wasn't killing me inside, when in reality it was destroying me.
"I had no idea, neither did my other teammates, but things have been hectic since meet season started."
"Ah, typical Konstantin. He is such an honorable man. He puts everyone before him. I told him when we go on our honeymoon that I plan to make sure he gets all the relaxation he needs," she purred.
Fuck.
"Yes," I bit out. "That he does. I'm sure he could use the break." I paused, giving a very empty yet fulfilled smile to throw her off. Despite my fake mom, I learned from the best. She wouldn't know the difference anyway. "If you'll excuse me, I have an appointment I have to be at," I lied through my teeth.
My appointment wasn't today. I didn't even have one. All I knew was that I had to get out of there because if I didn't, any minute now the dams were going to break, and I didn't want to fall apart inside World Cup when they did.
"Of course," she said.
I turned and made my way toward the locker area, where I opened my locker and tried to pull out my duffle bag. It got stuck between the metal walls, so I began pulling and yanking and shoving hard, grunting and on the verge of tears when someone leaned over me and helped me yank my bag out.
I glanced over my shoulder and found a remorseful Reagan.
Why the hell… Why was she being nice and helping me? I shook my head, not having the time to care to think. She handed me my bag and I rummaged for my keys and cellphone. When I couldn't find them, she dug them out and handed them to me.
I almost broke down from that.
"Just go," she said quietly.
So I did.
Throwing my duffle bag over my shoulder, I swallowed back every emotion I was feeling and walked out of World Cup with my head up.
"Congrats, guys! I'll be back later! Off to tutoring," I said, then pushed open the door. I sucked in a huge breath of air and stalked toward my truck as my cell phone rang. I didn't recognize the number, so I didn't answer it.
Once I reached my truck, I glanced down at my phone and saw whoever had called had left a voice message.
Expelling heavy breath after heavy breath, I listened to the voicemail.
"Hello, Ms. Rossi, this is your physician's office. We've been trying to reach you regarding your test results. It is imperative that you contact us immediately to schedule an appointment to come in and go over them."
Tears coated my eyelashes. Clicking out of the message, I gripped the door handle and fell against the side of the truck. I squeezed my eyes shut, they could wait. I'd call the doctors tomorrow for sure. Just not today. There was no way I could do anything else today other than sulk in a dark corner and cry.
Sucking in a lungful of air, I scrolled through my contacts and called the only real friend I had left. My chest rose and fell so fast, tightening, I thought I was on the verge of a panic attack. I could hardly catch my breath.
"Hello?"
I gasped, my chin quivered. "Hayden?"
"Aid," he muttered under his breath. Hayden wasn't stupid, he knew Kova was involved by the sound of my voice. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"
"I'm not hurt, but…I…" I didn't bother to hide the breathless crackle in my voice.
Kova was married.
Kova was married.
Kova was married.
My chest caved in and my knees shook. I was dizzy, and close to fainting. God, the pain was so bad. I trusted him. I gave him everything and all he ever did was deceive me. Everything that came out of his beautiful mouth was a lie my heart held close.
Lies were equivalent to breathing air for Kova. It was amazingly terrifying how much destruction one person could cause with the slip of a tongue.
My head was a mess and I couldn’t think straight. Fat tears started falling so fast I couldn't stop them. I started crying, the hiccup in my voice couldn't be hidden. "I…I need you," I choked out.
"Where are you?" I could hear the urgency in his voice.
"World Cup…by my truck."
"On my way. Stay there. Don't move."
I hung up my phone and stared at my reflection in the dark tinted window, frozen in place. Whether Kova knew it or not, he had destroyed me. I grabbed onto the door handle tighter, but I couldn't move. The world was spinning around me as I spun in the opposite direction, the walls closing in with each spin. My breathing deepened until my ribs crushed my broken heart and I struggled for air.
I was a fool. A young, naive fool who ate lies for breakfast and spouted them just as fast as Kova did. We were the same, yet we were not, because I'd never, ever hurt someone the way he hurt me.
I blinked, and something dawned on me. Last night when Kova was deep inside me and I was trying to ease his pain, he spoke many things in Rus
sian, but there was one word he said over and over that I had meant to look up.
Prosti.
Pulling open my truck door, I dragged myself inside and googled what prosti meant.
It took two seconds to figure it out. Chills ran down my arms as I stared in absolute shock.
"I'm sorry," I whispered aloud.
Kova was sorry, because he knew, and he didn't tell me. He knew, and the worst part was that he took what I so freely gave…because I loved him.
I loved Konstantin Kournakova.
I fell for this beautiful, Russian man, who slowly destroyed me, and I had no one to blame but myself.
It was startling. My hand flew to my chest as I struggled to breathe. My eyes scanned around my car, over the rich black dashboard, the leather seats, the wood grain. I inhaled the fresh new car scent and wanted to throw up. The car was getting smaller, the seats were shifting closer. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to block it out. I needed to get out.
"Prosti."
Oh God. The reality that I loved him and what love caused me to do, shattered me completely. I believed everything he had said, I’d misread his touch, his kiss. While I thought he was expressing his love, he was actually breaking my heart. I lost myself to him and he took it. He didn't care about me. There was no way Kova cared about me, or he would've done something, anything, to prevent the agony tearing through me. He didn't want me, just like my mom didn't want me. I would never be enough for anyone.
I wasn't sure how I would come back from the damage he’d caused. I was strong, but I could only handle so much.
My heart was reaching out for help. I needed Hayden. He was my only friend. The only one who didn't cause me pain and exhaustion and devastation. The one constant who I could lean on when things got rough.
It was only a handful of minutes and a lot of tears and gasping for breath until he was there opening my truck door and pulling me into his embrace. I sagged into Hayden's chest, feeling his warmth, even though I was so cold inside. I shivered, goose bumps ran down my arms and my knees buckled. I fisted his shirt and cried silent tears while his hand rubbed slow circles against my back, holding me tight as I lost myself.
"It will be okay, Aid, I promise," Hayden said softly, then he kissed the top of my head. "I promise to take your pain away. Let me take you away from here."
I nodded and exhaled.
We were a team, he had said. I exhale, and you inhale.
A lot of time passed when my eyes couldn't produce any more tears. I felt myself completely shut down inside. Exhaustion taking over, I was void of any emotion.
Everyone had a breaking point, and I'd just reached mine.
I was so tired. Tired of thinking. Of feeling. Of hurting. Of giving.
I just wanted to release it all, and so I did…with Hayden.
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To be continued…
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Preorder Release, the next book in the Off Balance series, on iBooks now.
Acknowledgments
To my husband, Tony, who became both parents to our boys and took over everything in our home so I could finish this book. Actions speak louder than words, and you showed how much you support my writing endeavors without saying a word and picking up my slack. Your support means the most to me, after all, I wouldn't be able to write without it. Thank you for never complaining and actually bugging me to get on my laptop to write.
Nadine Winningham, you're my best friend, and my editor. I love that we can keep both aspects separate and remain so close. I thought Balance was a lot of work, but I think Execution was even more. Thing is, you get me. You took this monster of a story that I was panicking about and styled it into what I envisioned. I can never thank you enough for the time and effort you put into editing.
Dessure Hutchins, Thank you just isn’t enough to show my gratitude. You stepped in and became my second hand and took over all my responsibilities so I could write this book. You brainstormed with me and dealt with the crazy ideas that came to me for this series, listened to me vent, and read everything I wrote on the fly. I’m forever grateful for all the help you so selflessly gave to me. More importantly, you became my lifelong friend, and that means the most to me.
Jill Mac, I'm not sure how, but you heard my cry for help and swooped in like an angel with horns on your broomstick and saved me at the eleventh hour. I can't thank you enough for all the help you offered, for settling my nerves, for putting all my promo stuff together, and for dealing with my antics.
Amber Hodge, I hope you know you're stuck with me for life. Thank you for listening to me—and brainstorming with me—over the wild storyline that sometimes made your jaw drop. I won't ever forget your text messages…lol. Your knowledge of the written word is priceless, but more importantly, so is our friendship. THANK YOU!
Alyssa, you're my favorite lunatic. You've been by my side since the beginning, reading every word I write and giving me honest and blunt feedback that we laugh over. Thank you for everything. I can't wait until this summer to sit on a beach with you and do nothing but take in the waves and bake in the sun!
Lori Scaman, once again, thank you so much for answering every question I had about gymnastics and double checking what I wrote. There's no way I could've made the continuation of this series possible the way I wanted without you. Down to where every meet is, to the fine details of each skill, to the inside secret look you have of the sport we love so much. I owe you so much!
Lucy Taylor for helping me translate my words into Russian. You were always willing to help any time of the day to make sure I got it just right. Thank you so much! You helped make Kova authentic and real.
Lisa Kitko and Carolina Leon, thank you both for reading Execution in its early, extremely embarrassing first stage. You both gave me priceless feedback and put up with random chapters you pieced together to get a general idea.
To the readers, thank you so much for being patient with me while I finished this book. I never expected anyone to actually like Balance—I know it's not everyone's cup of tea—so seeing you want more is so humbling. The messages, the emails, the comments, the fanmade teasers, they all have a special place in my heart. Thank you for showing me it was okay to write this story, and for loving it so hard. You guys rock!
Other Novels by Lucia Franco
All novels can be found on Amazon, iBooks, Kobo, Nook, and Google Play
All or Nothing series
You'll Think of Me
Hold On to Me
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Off Balance series
Balance
A competitive athlete for over ten years, Lucia Franco currently resides in sunny South Florida with her husband and two boys. Paranormal romance was her first love, but she has a soft spot in her heart for small-town and reunion romance stories.
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When Lucia is not hard at work on her next novel, you can find her relaxing with her toes in the sand at a nearby beach.
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