Cross

by Heather Young-Nichols

  It didn’t add up, but I wasn’t going to dwell on it. We had lunch with the guys from Kissing Cinder before soundcheck. Something I was told they did every tour.

  “I wouldn’t give Indie such a hard time,” Dean said as he appeared beside me.

  I hadn’t even seen him around, which meant he’d gotten to witness my shitty-ass mood. Dean’d been with Vince Cinderstone for years, so he’d dealt with more security issues than anyone.

  “Who?” I started walking and he followed.

  “Indie. The girl you were just fucking with.”

  “And who the fuck is Indie?”

  Dean burst out into a louder than necessary laugh. I didn’t seem much humor in the situation. Of course, Dixon and Ransom decided to join us just then, meaning they’d get to hear about my shitty mood, too.

  “What’s so funny?” Ransom asked.

  Dean continued to laugh, which I just found annoying and Ransom then Dixon laughed at him laughing. What a clusterfuck start to the day. Finally, Dean got himself together enough to speak.

  “Who the fuck is Indie?” Dean repeated my question. “That’s the girl you were just giving a hard time.”

  Ransom and Dixon both cocked their heads to the side while looking at me. At least they hadn’t seen that part of my day.

  “That same girl taking pictures in the venue?” Ransom asked.

  “Yeah.” Dean chucked again. “Indie Cinderstone. Vince’s daughter. She’ll be at lunch today with her dad.”

  My bandmates broke out into a round of laughter that put Dean’s to massive shame. Assholes.

  “Fuck,” I muttered.

  Indie Cinderstone could possibly put an end to Courting Chaos being on this tour if she wanted to. And I didn’t even know Vince had a kid. Or maybe I did, but I sure as hell didn’t remember. Either way, we were working hard to keep Drink from fucking this whole thing up for us, so I sure as hell wasn’t going to do it by not watching my manners.

  “Vince Cinderstone’s daughter, asshole?” Dixon pushed me from behind as we made our way down the hall toward the dressing rooms. “You had to go be a dick to her?”

  Thank fuck I shared a room or a bus with Ransom on the road. He wouldn’t ride me about this as long as Dixon and if Drink never found out, that’d be perfect.

  “How was I supposed to know she’s his daughter?” I shot back. “Drink has me in a terrible mood and she keeps taking pictures.”

  “Did you break her camera with your ugly face?” Ransom asked.

  I flipped him off and kept walking.

  Courting Chaos had picked up steam. We were on the radio and had some decent sales, but we needed this tour as a band. Landing the opening act gig with Kissing Cinder was supposed to solidify our spot. This was our time.

  We had to focus on the music, not letting Drink mess this up for us with something he did or forcing the rest of us be his fucking babysitters.

  But that meant I couldn’t fuck it up either.

  Chapter Three

  Indie

  I hadn’t been lying when I’d told that jerk in the arena that I had somewhere to be. Dad was expecting me and if I didn’t show up soon, he’d send Dean to track me down. I found the door that would open out into the bus area so that I could slip through without the mounting crowd outside noticing.

  Nine huge buses were easy to hide behind. The members of Kissing Cinder each had their own, so that was four. Two for the crew, one that their manager and makeup or wardrobe people used, which meant the opener was on the last two buses. Those things could hold a lot of people, but I didn’t think Courting Chaos had a lot of members. Yet two buses.

  I’d meant to look the band up before I’d left Michigan, but with finals and studying, I’d run out of time. I’d heard some of their music, though. They were good. Better than some that had opened for Dad in the past.

  “Dad,” I called once I shut his bus door behind me and pulled my camera from around my neck to set it on the counter. I never minded the weight of the camera, yet it still felt good once I removed it. “I’m here,” I called out, wanting to make sure he had plenty of warning that I’d arrived. I’d walked in on more than one awkward situation before and was determined to never do that again. Dad promised it wouldn’t happen again, but I could never be too careful.

  “Indie,” Dad called out from the bedroom at the back of the bus.

  Just outside the door were two sleepers on either side, which was where Dad insisted on sleeping when we were traveling overnight. He said he could sleep anywhere and a lot of the time he spent the night on another bus. When they were… entertaining or doing rock star stuff that I didn’t want to think about. Though most of the time, I fell asleep on the couch up front.

  “You made it.” Dad pulled me to him tightly and held for a good thirty seconds before releasing.

  “Yup. Dean took a few bullets and had to outrun the Russian mafia, but we made it.”

  Dad snorted. “Don’t make fun because I care about your safety.

  He and I didn’t look much alike. I took after Mom with medium blonde hair and blue eyes. Dad’s hair was too long and dark brown, just the slightest of grey popping up now that he was in his mid-forties. His eyes were dark, too. I also didn’t get any of his height. He’d been a mountain when I’d been a kid and he was a mountain now that I was an adult.

  “How long have you been here?” he asked, pulling me to the table.

  I sat down while he went to the fridge to grab each of us a bottle of water before joining me.

  “Not long,” I said. “I roamed around the venue for a while in case you were still sleeping.”

  “Taking pictures?”

  I nodded while drinking from my bottle.

  “No trouble getting your passes?”

  “Dean takes care of everything, Dad. You know that.” I took another drink. Dad and I talked all the time, so this whole ‘catching up’ thing was weird. We didn’t need it, but at the same time, talking a few times a week wasn’t the same as being in the same room. “So what’s the situation with everyone this time around? Any new wives?”

  Dad chuckled. “Not that I know of. Hilary isn’t joining Cody for another few months.”

  Cody Gilbert. Drummer for Kissing Cinder and Dad’s best friend. Cody was like a second dad to me or at least an uncle. Since I’d known the whole band all my life, Manny their bass player, and lead singer, Brent, acted like uncles, too. Dad had known those three most of his life. They were his brothers.

  “Manny and Brent… ” He trailed off. “I don’t know. They’re Manny and Brent. They’ve been working hard on some new music. I gave them a fuck ton of lyrics before we left on tour. Figure it’ll keep them out of trouble. What’s going on with you?”

  Dad got up and began moving around the bus, pulling clothes out. Obviously, he wanted to start getting ready for the day.

  “I think I did pretty well on my finals.”

  “As usual.” Dad looked over at me with a big, proud smile. College had never been on the radar for him, even if the band hadn’t taken off. Which just made him ecstatic that I was on the track.

  “Next semester looks pretty interesting. I have a couple of photography classes that I’ll love.”

  “And how’s your mom?”

  “Good. Busy as always. She and Mark expanded their marketing firm, so she basically lives there. They hired a bunch of new people.” Some of my friends’ parents were divorced and didn’t have nearly the relationship my parents had and I couldn’t imagine living that way. The arguing. The resentment. The constant pull from one to another. I rather liked that my parents were still friends.

  “It’s going well?” He pulled off one shirt and put on a new T-shirt. I really hoped he’d leave the room to change his pants, though.

  Since I’d turned eighteen, Mom and Dad didn’t talk as much as they used to. Obviously, they saw one another when Dad came to see me and everything was very friendly, but once Mom had gotten married, Dad had pulled back
from her. Said he didn’t want to interfere with her marriage. I could see his point. Some men might’ve felt… less than knowing that their wife’s former boyfriend was one of the most recognizable people in the world.

  “Seems to be,” I said with a shrug. “Honestly, I don’t really stay all that informed, but they seem happy with the increase in business. I hear words like profit margin, conversion, and optimization. I don’t know what any of that is.”

  Dad chuckled and said, “Me, either. I’m going to hop in back for a minute, get changed, and we can head to lunch.”

  I gave him a thumbs-up, mostly to show my approval of him changing somewhere that wasn’t in front of me.

  While I waited, I leaned over and grabbed my camera to begin flipping through the pictures I’d taken so far. I made decisions quickly when it came to my photos. At least in the first round. Anything blurry that wasn’t supposed to be, hit the delete button. Any weird poses, delete.

  “Indie,” Cody said from behind me.

  I hadn’t heard the bus door open or close, yet there he was behind me when I looked over my shoulder. Damn getting engrossed in those pictures. At least it was just Cody, second father, and not some random woman or creepy dude.

  I stood up and turned around as he dropped my suitcase and duffle bag on the ground. It only took him two big steps before he hit me with full force and wrapped me in his strong arms. Cody was home for me, just like Dad.

  “Jesus Christ, you get more beautiful every damn day,” he said, squeezing me even tighter.

  “I’d say every minute,” I shot back as I pulled away. His body shook with his laughter.

  “Was there ever any doubt she’d be beautiful?” Dad asked as he came out of the bedroom. “I mean, look at her parents.”

  “Yeah,” Cody agreed. “It’s a good thing she looks like her mother.”

  Dad lifted his middle finger and they both laughed.

  “You’ve been roaming around here, I’m sure,” Cody said to me because he knew me too well. “Find anything interesting to document?”

  “The usual,” I said with a shrug. “Fans outside, which I got some great shots of.”

  “I’m sure.”

  “This is a great venue, too. You should let me get some band pics before we leave.” They let me do that sometimes. Get the band together and practice my artistry. I called that a kid perk.

  “That can be arranged,” Dad said with a smile.

  I loved how much they supported my hobby-slash-hopeful future profession. I could make a lot of money with the photos I’d taken of Kissing Cinder over the years. Of course, I’d never sell them. Certainly not without the band’s explicit permission. Though they did use one of mine for some merchandise, which meant I’d received a fee for the copyright. Probably more than I should’ve.

  “Oh, and I ran into a couple of super dickholes,” I said. “I really hope they were venue guys because if I had to deal with him all tour, it might get ugly.”

  “Super dickholes?” Cody chuckled and looked at Dad, who shrugged. “What’d he do?”

  “First one of them tried to kick me out. Then when I saw him again a little while later, he got on my ass for taking his picture when in reality he stepped into the shot I really wanted.”

  “What’d he look like?” Dad asked as he grabbed his wallet and keys.

  “The one was tall; kind of darker blonde, short hair; scruffy face—but he had a sleeve of tattoos on his right arm. A super nice sleeve of tattoos.”

  “Jesus, Indie,” Cody said as he laughed. “Want to sketch us a picture?”

  “Bite me,” I said back. Maybe I had taken too close of an inventory of hot guy in the arena, but I couldn’t ignore his hotness.

  “You know who that sounds like?” Dad asked Cody as if I wasn’t even there.

  “Cross,” Cody said back.

  “Yeah, Cross.”

  “Who’s Cross?” I butted in.

  Dad chuckled and ran a hand over his beard. “Cross Rhodes is the drummer for Courting Chaos.”

  “Our opening band,” Cody explained as if I wouldn’t understand.

  “What? He was such a dick.” So the guys I’d run into inside, who I thought were regular roadies, were actually the members of Courting Chaos. I would’ve thought they’d have been more personable but shit they were assholes. Especially the big one.

  Both of them were laughing a little too hard. I didn’t find any of this funny. Ugh, no wonder they’d thought I was a groupie who’d skirted security to track down the band. But he’d thought I was there to hook up with someone from Kissing Cinder. So gross.

  “So I don’t have to go to this thing, right?” I asked.

  “You’re going,” Cody said. “You always go. We do this a few weeks into tour every time. It’s tradition.”

  “Listen.” Dad took my hands in his as he squatted down to my eye level. “They’re on tour with us all summer. Try to be nice.”

  “Me?” I asked with wide eyes. “I’m not the one that called me a medic.”

  “A medic?” Dad’s smirk slowly slid off his face.

  “Something about bringing sexual healing.”

  “Fuckers,” Cody snapped. “We’re gonna have to kill the opening act, Vince.”

  “Technically,” I said with no idea why I wanted to defend any of them, including Cross, “Cross wasn’t the one who said it. It was one of the others. Huge guy. Black hair. Aggressive.”

  “Drinkswine,” Dad said. “Things will be made clear with them, Indie. I’ll make sure they know you aren’t to be fucked with, but try to play nice. Make this easy on your old man.”

  “You can take it,” I said as I patted his shoulder.

  We stepped off the bus to head to the car, but damn if my mind couldn’t get off the fact that I was on tour with those jerks from earlier for the entire summer. Not exactly who I’d choose. But there had been others through the years that I hadn’t liked and I’d made it a point to never make Dad’s job harder. I’d made it work then and I’d make it work now. Dad would put me first, no question. But I made it a point to never ask him to.

  Four months of touring with Courting Chaos and Cross Rhodes.

  Damn.

  Chapter Four

  Cross

  I really wished Dean hadn’t told me Indie was going to be at lunch with her dad. Vince Cinderstone—well, all of Kissing Cinder really—was intimidating enough without me being a dick to his daughter. And if he knew some of the thoughts that had run through my head since seeing her that last time… yeah, I’d be dead for sure.

  Obviously, I’d been irritated during both my run-ins with her, but even that irritation couldn’t dim how beautiful she was. The fact that she hadn’t backed down to me or Drink took her beauty to a scorching level. And Drink could be scary. He was too big and too dumb to know when to back down.

  “You ready?” Ransom asked, cutting through all the shit in my head.

  “Yeah,” I said, giving my hair one last ruffle.

  “Nervous?”

  “Why the fuck would I be nervous?”

  “Oh, I don’t know,” he said, opening the door to our bus. “A certain blonde hottie who Drink may have indicated was a groupie?”

  Fuuuuck. He had done that. “That asshole is gonna get us all in trouble.”

  We stepped out into the sun. I slid on a pair of sunglasses as we went to join Drink and Dixon in the van that would take us over to the restaurant Vince had arranged.

  “Yeah,” Ransom finally agreed. “We might want to start low-key looking for a bass player.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Do you honestly think it’ll be long before he fucks up so bad, we can’t keep it quiet?”

  My stomach clenched. That was what we all feared and if we started looking now, we wouldn’t be left in the lurch.

  “You’re not wrong,” I said. “Maybe we could talk to Lawson. He’d keep it quiet.”

  Ransom nodded as we approached the van and the door opened, almost s
lamming into him as he leaned into to grab the handle.

  “Get your bitch asses in here already. I’m starving,” Drink called out to us.

  “We’ll do it later today,” I said before we climbed in.

  Lawson got in the front passenger side and turned to look at us as the driver pulled out. He loved to use travel time, when we were all together in one vehicle, to cover band notes or lecture us. Which meant lecture Drink. The rest of us had a hell of a lot of fun, but we were also professionals when it came to the band.

  “Best behavior guys, yeah?” Lawson said, but he looked hard at Drink in particular.

  “Yes, Mother,” Drink said back.

  “I’m serious. Cinderstone’s daughter joins us today and I want manners and everything.”

  “Oh, we’ve met his daughter,” Dixon said with a chuckle. Lawson’s eyes narrowed and his jaw clenched. He absolutely did not like Dixon’s tone.

  “When?”

  “Cross tried to kick her out of the venue,” Dixon said with a laugh.

  “What?”

  I rolled my eyes and slapped the back of Dixon’s head. “It was a misunderstanding,” I said. “Don’t worry about it.”

  Lawson raised an eyebrow at me. I wasn’t usually the one he had to worry about. I didn’t often sleep with girls at the venue. Maybe once or twice. It just wasn’t my thing. I had a few beers once in a while but wouldn’t touch a drug no matter how much someone paid me.

  That might not be rock and roll, but that was me. My mom insisted I wouldn’t be like her brother, who’d died of a heroin overdose at twenty. From her no-means-no talks and the dangers of overindulging, I found I’d rather be in a relationship than hookup. Though the one-nighter sometimes still happened.

  “Stay away from Indie,” Lawson demanded. “She doesn’t need you assholes fucking with her for the next four months, got it?” Lawson’s tone was that of a father lecturing his sons on prom night.

  “Got it,” three out of four of us said together.

  Then Dixon gave Drink a hard nudge, but still, he said nothing. His smile much too satisfied for any of our liking.