Beautiful Broken Girl (Broken Girl series Book 1)

by Rachael Tonks

  “Hey Ken, I was shouting for you, did you not hear me? What's wrong? Why you running out of here like you’ve seen a ghost?”

  “Nothing, it’s fine honestly,” I lie. I’m shaking and my breathing is unsteady, I close my eyes tightly, trying to calm myself.

  He leans his face towards mine, hooking his finger under my chin. “It doesn’t look like nothing Ken, did someone say something? Was it Cait?”

  His arm is still around my waist and I lean into his chest, breathing in deeply. For some reason I feel so safe in his arms. As he holds me tighter, I can’t help but notice how perfectly I fit there; like I was made for them. His lips graze the top of my head.

  “Please tell me what happened Kennedy? I hate to see you upset like this.”

  I slowly look up into his eyes and feel completely and utterly lost. How can someone I have only known for a couple of weeks provoke such strong emotional feelings in me? I was just about to answer him when we are interrupted and Cole is ripped from me. I wince at the cold feeling he leaves behind. Of course I know instantly who has torn us apart, there would only be one culprit.

  “Cole baby,” Caitlin purrs at him like a cat. It makes me gag slightly. “I want to go home. I don’t have much time to get ready before my BIG night out with the girls,” she emphasizes big and looks at me with hate in her eyes.

  I slowly start to walk towards Cole’s truck, my head down. Just as I reach up to open the front door my hand is slapped away. I look up and Caitlin is in my face. She leans down so she’s looking me straight in the eyes. “Don’t even think about it bitch, my place is in the front and that is never going to change, so don’t get any ideas. You’ll always belong in the back,” she sneers.

  Looks like I’ve been downgraded to the back seat. Fine by me; the further away I was from Cole the better. At least I could breathe.

  The journey back to Caitlin’s was uneventful. I just stayed quiet while she droned on and on about cheerleading practice. Her voice really was annoying; how Cole put up with it was beyond me. I could feel him looking at me in the rear view mirror but avoided looking back. I knew it would be 20 questions as soon as Caitlin left the car anyway.

  As we pull up to her gigantic house, she turns and glares at me with venom in her eyes, smirking. She grabs Cole’s head and plants the most revolting looking kiss on his lips. I mean seriously girl; you don’t need to use that much tongue. Not that I’m an expert or anything. It’s literally like she is a dog pissing on a tree. I feel like shouting at the top of my lungs, “JESUS CAITLIN! I know he is yours, just stop with the freaking side show!”

  I bite my tongue though; I don’t want to sound jealous, or worse, for them to think that I am.

  Cole jumps back in the truck resting his arm on the back of the seat in front, turning and looking at me he shouts, “Jump in the front Kennedy.”

  I hesitate for a second before stepping over into the front beside him.

  “That’s better,” he smiles. “I didn’t want to keep looking through the rear view mirror to talk to you.”

  I can’t contain the grin as I buckle up, but shit I am nervous. I clamp my hands together tightly hoping he won’t notice my hands shaking.

  “How was your first day? I saw you with Abbey and Ash, I gotta say those two are real oddballs,” he laughs.

  “That’s probably why we get along then,” I spit back.

  He raises his eyebrow before resting his hand on my shoulder.

  “I wouldn’t describe you as an oddball Kennedy, a little mysterious, but definitely not an oddball.”

  “Mysterious?” I muse. “Well we all have our secrets Cole.”

  “We do,” he answers, and I can hear the smile in his voice. “Hey I have a thought,” he blurts out, an air of excitement to his voice.

  “Oh yeah, what’s that?” I ask cautiously, studying his face for a reaction.

  “Why don’t we hang out tonight, just you, me and a DVD?” he wiggles his eyebrows, and I let out a little laugh.

  “Oh I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” I answer honestly.

  “Why?” he pauses for a second before continuing. “Afraid you won’t be able to keep your hands to yourself, after all; have you seen me?” he laughs, totally mocking my earlier comment.

  “Are you mocking me Cole?” I pout at him and he just laughs louder.

  “Are you agreeing to hang out?” he pouts back and I think I melt a little. I can’t seem to erase the smile from my face and just nod. Inside, I can’t wait to spend time with Cole; on the outside I’m as nervous as hell. My hands shake frantically as I grab on to the back pack resting on my knees. We pull onto the drive and jump out of the truck, heading into the house together. I walk slightly behind him, taking in his physique. My eyes flit from his broad shoulders, over his well sculptured back, each muscle defined and flexing as he moves in front of me. My eyes finally stop, resting at his ass. I bite my lip as I force my eyes away, shaking my head trying to clear the thoughts racing through my mind.

  I head inside and race up the stairs to my room. My heart beats furiously against my chest as I lean against the closed door. My head is full of mixed emotions and I allow my eyes to flutter shut. Maybe hanging out will be fun, I tell myself. Dammit who am I kidding, after the day I’ve had I just want to hide away. My run in with Caitlin and that whole shitty situation with Dennis is playing over and over in my mind. I stumble over to the bed, crashing down on it. Trying to act normal, trying to fit in around here was never going to work. I let out a groan of frustration as I slam my fist against the bed. Shit! I’m never going to be that girl that fits in; I’m too fucked up, too damaged.

  Cole

  I knock on Kennedy’s door, patiently waiting for her to answer. Despite it only taking her a few seconds, it feels like forever. She slowly opens the door and I’m met by the brightest, sea blue eyes I have ever seen as she peers at me through the gap. I gulp down hard before asking, “Ready to hang out? I put some snacks together”

  She yawns widely before stepping out. “Sure am,” she answers with a half-smile.

  “Are you sure? You look pretty tired,” I add as we make our way downstairs.

  “I have trouble sleeping, I always look tired,” she shrugs. As we reach the living room I see her scanning the room I have set up.

  “Wow this looks great Cole, I didn’t realize you were going to so much trouble,” she gasps.

  “Oh this- it’s nothing,” I dismiss, leading her over to sit. The coffee table in front of us is set out with potato chips and dip, chocolate-chip cookies and two bowls of popcorn. She drops down on to the seat and I can’t help myself, I sit right beside her; our legs are touching I’m so close.

  “I’ve picked out a movie I think you will really love.”

  “Okay,” she answers simply, shooting me a smile. I point the remote at the screen and relax back into the seat, resting my arm across the back of the sofa.

  We sit in comfortable silence, watching the movie. Momentarily glancing to the side, I realize Kennedy isn’t looking at the screen at all. She is looking at me. I turn to her but she darts her eyes back to the TV. I can’t contain my grin as I remain fixated on her. She lets out the sweetest sounding giggle as she fidgets, tucking her hair behind her ears. Her eyes flit between me and the screen, her lips pulling into a smirk.

  She shifts uncomfortably under my gaze.

  “What?” she asks, scrunching her nose into a cute little button.

  “I’m just returning your admiration,” I joke and she glares at me with a wide smirk.

  “I don’t know what you could possibly be talking about,” her smile widens. She wiggles beside me, crossing then uncrossing her legs beside me. I lean down and pull her legs over mine. I can see that she is surprised, but doesn’t resist. Her head now rests on the back of the sofa, the top of her head just touching my arm. It feels so good having her beside me.

  We remain this way until the film finishes. I pull my head back and glance down at her
and realize she has fallen asleep. She thrashes out suddenly and it scares the shit out of me. I watch her intently as she mumbles, trying to work out what she is saying.

  “Kennedy,” I whisper while shaking her legs that are still across my lap, “wake up.” Her eyes fly open and she scrambles off the sofa, jumping to her feet. I can see she is physically shaking as she stands there, arms crossed over her chest, eyes bloodshot and full of impending tears.

  “Dammit Ken, are you okay?”

  “I err.. I have to go,” she mumbles and turns away from me, quickly running off and up the stairs. I shout after her but she doesn’t stop, she doesn’t even look back.

  Kennedy

  I hold my breath trying to stifle the sob I know is coming, forcing its way out.

  I start to shake, the emotion clawing its way to the surface. My effort to fight this is futile. I exhale and with it my cries escape. I collapse heavily on the bed and curl up, holding myself as tightly as I can. The tears sting my eyes, leaving a burning trail over my cheeks as they fall. The nightmares haunt me; the face of the man I have escaped plague me every time I close my eyes.

  The next week passes by and I do all I can to avoid Dennis. Cole still hasn’t let up on the inquisition, he knows something is wrong and he has tried his damnedest to get me to spill. I see no benefit to him knowing what happened and how much of a jerk his friend really is. I catch Dennis winking at me sometimes, which causes bile to rise in the back of my throat. I don’t really know what that dick’s problem is, but avoidance is all I’ve got right now. This second week has been a major struggle; I have been surviving on virtually no sleep whatsoever. My throat is sore and no amount of concealer can hide the dark circles under my eyes.

  I’m scared to sleep. Almost every night I wake up screaming, covered in sweat, breathing like my life depends on it while my heart beats through my chest. I know it’s the memories of my past, haunting me while I sleep. I think what happened with Dennis has been a catalyst to unearthing all of the pain and fear I’d tried to push away and keep hidden deep inside. School is already exhausting, but with very little sleep it is damn near impossible.

  I have barely seen Cole, other than in our one shared class and a few fleeting moments after school. He’s either been at Caitlin's or practice. He invited me to a party at his friend Jake’s house this weekend, but I declined. No one wanted the outcast there after all, and with what happened with Dennis, I’m not sure that I’m ready to be social.

  My recluse tendencies keep me at the Petersons virtually all of the time. When I’m not studying, I help out with cleaning this huge, beautiful home. Jocelyn has caught on to the fact that I’ve been keeping myself busy with housework and in turn has offered to pay me for the cleaning I’m doing. I did mention the possibility of getting a part time job while at school so I can save as much as possible, but Jocelyn didn’t feel comfortable with me doing that; well not just yet anyway. That’s when she offered to pay me. I tried to refuse and explained it was my way of showing my gratitude for them putting me up, but she was absolutely adamant she would pay me for my cleaning services.

  Cole

  Thank fuck the weekend’s here. This last week has been shit; I’ve been totally off my game. I can’t concentrate on jack and I think it’s all this shit with Kennedy. It’s messing my fucking head up. The girl just will not tell me what happened last week at school, or what her little outburst on the sofa was all about. Nothing, nada. No matter how many times I ask, all I get is “it was nothing”. Blatant lie! Nobody reacts like that over nothing.

  I’ve tried to give her some space, so I’ve barely been at home this past week. I’ve spent a few nights with Cait, and boy did I need it. Our relationship is one of convenience more than anything else. Can’t complain though, after all, the sex is good and right about now that’s all I’m in this for. There’s no doubt that Caitlin feels the same; we’re no fucking Romeo and Juliet.

  This weekend is going to be epic. Jake’s parents are out of town on some anniversary getaway bullshit and he’s having a party while they’re gone. All the boys together, music playing, alcohol flowing; shit I need to let off some steam. I still haven’t been able to convince Kennedy to come. She keeps declining but I think getting her out the house would do her good. She seems to be stuck in a rut. I think she just needs to let go and have some fun. Although I haven’t been around much lately, I can tell she isn’t sleeping. The bags under her eyes are getting darker and I know it has something to do with what happened at school. She was sleeping fine before.

  I make it my mission to get her to come with me tonight, so I go on the hunt to find her. I know she’s tucked away somewhere in this house; she doesn’t seem to leave it often, only to go to school. I’ve noticed she has been hanging out with that weird kid Ash and the babbler Abbey, maybe if I tell her to invite them she will come.

  As I walk in to the kitchen, I see Kennedy on her hands and knees scrubbing the floor like some sexy kind of Cinderella, singing along to some cheesy song playing through the radio. Boy, this girl is a wet dream and she doesn’t even know it.

  I take a deep breath and let out a little cough. Kennedy jumps out of her skin, knocking over the water bucket. “Jesus Ken! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you jump.”

  “Oh my god Cole, I didn’t think there was anyone else here,” she sweetly replies, looking at me all doe eyed. I hold out my hand to help her get up. She is so light and tiny she falls straight into my arms. I hold her tight and look at her intently as she slowly lifts her eyes to meet mine. “I’m sorry; I can help you clean up the water. Why on earth are you so jumpy?”

  “I told you, it’s because I didn’t think there was anyone here,” she mutters and moves away from my hold. “Don’t worry, I can get it,” she says while gesturing to the large puddle.

  “Shit, I didn’t mean to make more work for you, in fact I just wanted to try and talk you into going to this party tonight. I thought it might be nice for you and your little blabber mouth friend to come along. It’s going to be a blast and I really think you could use a night out of this house. You must be going stir crazy looking at these same four walls. I spoke to Mom and she thinks it’s a good idea...”

  “She does?”

  “She does. Get out, socialize and let your hair down Ken, come on it will be great!”

  “Well... err...Who’s going to be there?”

  “A few people from school and the football team, minus Dennis. He has some sort of family commitment, thank god. Fuck, that guy is a douche.”

  “Wait... What? I thought you and Dennis were friends, he’s always with you. Like he’s stuck to your side or something.”

  “Yeah, I can’t seem to shake the guy, he’s a tag along. Thinks he’s some big hot shot. Jake, whose party it is, and Pete are good guys; I will introduce you to them if you come along?”

  “Well, I’ll ask Abbey I guess, I’m not sure if she will be up for it though, so no promises. What about Caitlin, will she be there?” she asks sheepishly. “I’m not sure she would be too happy to see me.”

  “Nah, Caitlin isn’t coming tonight, some shit about girls’ night. I think they have some new dance routine to work on or something; to be honest, I don’t really care as long as the night’s drama free.”

  Kennedy

  So I think Cole just talked me into going to a party. Although I was reluctant at first, after hearing that neither Dennis nor Caitlin will be there, the idea of seeing Cole outside of school and home thrills me. I swiftly look through my school planner to find where Abbey had written her cell number. I find it on the back page and call her using the house phone. Jocelyn had said I was welcome to use it whenever, but this was the first time I actually had someone to call.

  The line rings until I hear a squeaky voice answer, “Hello?”

  “Hi Abbey, it’s Kennedy. Kennedy Harrison from school?”

  “Oh Kennedy, I’m so excited you called, I never thought you would call!” she says excitedly. “
So what’s happening? You’re awfully quiet.”

  I laugh a little. “That’s because you haven’t really given me a chance to speak yet Ab’s.” I take a deep breath trying to calm myself. “So here’s the thing. Cole asked me to go to this party at Jake’s house and he invited you too. I don’t know if I’m totally up for this, but I felt like I couldn’t say no.” There was a moment of dead silence.

  “WHAT?! Of course you can’t say no!” Abbey shrieks. “I’ll be over at 6; do you have anything to wear? I’ll bring you some things. I’ll drive to your house and we can just take a cab to Jake’s, I’m pretty sure I know where he lives. He’s a dream! Yes, a total dreamy dreamboat. OMG Kennedy I’m so excited,” she squeals. “I got to go, I got to get ready! Oh my god I can’t believe I am going to a party at Jake Matthew’s house! The parties there are legendary. Looks like Jake is finally taking the reins from his older brother Bennett.”

  “Jake has an older brother?” I quiz.

  “Yeah he’s enlisted now though. Looks as though Jake has finally stepped up to take his party master title,” she giggles. “Anyway… enough with the questions already.” And with that, she hung up.

  So, looks like we are going to a party tonight. Shit!

  I turn to see Cole leaning on the doorframe, arms across his chest and a smug grin on his face.

  “So Cinderella will go to the ball.”

  After about an hour and a half of preening and trying clothes on, Abbey and I are finally ready to go. I don’t recognize my reflection in the mirror. Abbey has me wearing a figure hugging dress that accentuates my breasts. I keep trying to adjust the damn thing to cover them better since they are spilling out of the top. I have insisted on changing several times, but Abbey is adamant I keep this one on. She tells me I look really pretty and that the coral color compliments my eyes. I have no idea what she’s talking about. I don’t ever really wear makeup but Abbey has gone to town, and I feel pretty for the first time in my life. Abbey is wearing a gorgeous black number and has curled her hair. Tonight she is wearing contacts and looks stunning without her glasses on. I almost don’t recognize her.