The Ways of Khrem

by D. Nathan Hilliard

  After an affirmation from above, I watched the guide rope go taut. Now for the next part. I started reeling up Holik’s rope until I could reach the lantern on the end of it. I quickly blew out the flame, then lowered it back down a few feet and started swinging it just like I did the blanket before.

  “Okay, Hollee, I’m going to throw you another rope. This is the one we’re going to pull you out of here with, so I want you to hang on to it real tight, okay? No, don’t worry. I’m going to come down there and tie you to it, but first I need you to catch and hold it. Okay?”

  “Y-yes, sir!” He had the blanket wrapped around him, but his teeth were chattering worse than ever now. I was truly starting to worry that he might pass out on me.

  I yelled at Grabel to undo the slipknot back at the poplar, giving me all the slack in Holik’s rope.

  “Okay, Hollee, here it comes. I just want you to hang on to this rope until I get down there. It won’t be long.”

  This time, I threw the rope on a lower arc, hoping to minimize impact on the lantern. The lantern clanged against the stone floor and then skidded about ten feet short of the post and the boy. It probably picked up a dent or two, but I hadn’t been planning to ever use it again, anyway. The boy hesitated, and then ran forward to grab the lantern. He snatched his hand back when he grabbed it by its still hot hood, but recovered and carefully plucked it from the floor by the rope attached to it. He took it back to the post with him, rewrapping the blanket around both him and the lantern to hold in some warmth.

  Perfect.

  Now it was my turn.

  Looking down, I could see Ole Toothsome waiting patiently. He floated there beneath the surface, staring up with blind, hopeful hunger. He was waiting for me to make a mistake and get too close to the surface of the pool, at least near enough for him to make another one of those prodigious leaps out of the water.

  Well, he was due for some disappointment.

  I clambered back up my rope until I was at the ceiling, and then hooked my leg over the guide rope heading down at an angle toward the post. Then I pulled my own rope up after me until I could hook the lantern at its end onto my belt. Now it could act as my safety line.

  “Grabel!”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “I want you to slowly take up the slack on my rope, but not tie it off to anything. In a moment, I’m going to start moving down the guide rope, and I’ll need you to let my rope pay out again. Got it?

  “Yes, sir.”

  I instructed him on what I intended to do and agreed on the signals I would use when the time came. Then, with a grin and a rude gesture to Ole Toothsome, I started descending the angled rope toward Holik.

  With my legs crossed over the rope, I did a simple hand-over-hand while sliding downwards. Within a minute, I dropped to the floor near the post and went to the boy. He sat on the floor, wrapped in the blanket, still holding his rope.

  “Okay, son. Give me your rope and follow me over to the post.”

  He did as instructed, his eyes drooping from exhaustion and cold.

  I needed to get him out of here now.

  I put a quick loop in his rope, right above the loop he would be in. Then I pulled the guide rope free, fed it through the small loop of Holik’s rope, and reattached it to the post. Once I put the end loop of his rope around him and gave Grabel the order to pull, he would ascend at the same angle as the guide rope, and well out of reach of the monster in the pool.

  “Okay, Hollee,” I cajoled the boy cheerfully, “I know you’re cold, but once I get this on you and give Grabel the signal up there, you’ll be out of here inside a minute. You don’t have to do anything but hold on. Let’s get that blanket off and your rope on so we can both get out of here.”

  I could tell he wasn’t enthused about taking off the blanket, but the promise of escape stilled all objections. I told him to lift his arms and then fitted the end loop over them and his head. Pulling his arms back down, I tightened the loop around him. Then I looked around to make sure the guide rope was good and secured.

  It sat a little higher on the post than I liked, so I went over to push it down further. It hung on something. I looked on the other side of the post to see what the obstruction was.

  It turned out to be a large iron ring, fixed firmly in the back of the post. For just a second, I pondered what possible purpose the ring could have, and then it hit me…

  Oh.

  Oh, no…

  I spun to look back at the pool at the same time that Holik screamed.

  The creature looked over the edge of the pool, and right at us.

  “GRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOORRPP!!!!” it churgled in a deep bass tone.

  Chapter Five

  Captain Eshaw: Aye, that would be Kondu Tule…the

  hellspawned fish that wrecked my craft and ate my good

  right arm.

  Silas Wain: And now you sail the world’s seas to hunt the

  beast down?

  Captain Eshaw: Gods, no! Why in the purple hells would I

  want to do that? To give him dessert? —Saludail’s Voyage of

  the Opal Princess.

  Everything had changed.

  This thing could leave the water after all—and it was only twenty feet from us.

  I didn’t have time to secure the guide rope to the post better, so I simply pulled it back off and wrapped it around my arm. Then I braced my foot against the post, pulled the guide rope tight, and yanked out the only weapon in my arsenal.

  “Grabel, pull!”

  “Hey! That’s my mom’s spoooooffffff!” the boy exclaimed, as he suddenly jerked forwards and upwards.

  The great beast paused in its efforts to come ashore while it watched the boy sail up toward the ceiling.

  It probably didn’t get to see things like that every day.

  Holik’s speed was impressive, and the monster tracked his progress with his toothy mouth agape as the boy soared toward freedom. His flight was the result of three men running on the other end of the rope, and I grew alarmed as he approached the mouth of the shaft. Fortunately, Grabel had followed my estimates and must have marked down where he wanted them to halt because the boy came to a stop about five feet from the ceiling. Then his progress slowly resumed.

  Losing interest in the boy, the massive creature resumed its efforts and heaved its bulk out of the pool and onto the stone floor. Water flowed out across the stonework, displaced by the monster’s exit from the basin.

  As I watched it lumber ashore, I realized I had been all wrong about the nature of this creature.

  Because of the ghastly face, I assumed it must have been some form of fish. And considering the way it chose to stay underwater while watching me on the ropes, it was a reasonable assumption to make. But on land, the body behind that head turned out to resemble the sea lions that basked on the rocks below the Cambriatic Sea Wall every spring.

  On the other hand, none of those animals sported the spines or jaws of this monster. Nor were they anywhere near this big. Water hissed as it ran off its giant flanks in rivulets, and the loud smack of its thick hide against the stonework filled the chamber. Its pale skin possessed an almost rocklike texture due to the barnacles and various growths covering the beast.

  The titan and I stared at each other across the short gap between us—in a room that suddenly felt much smaller—and I tried to remember the last time I had even come close to dying this stupidly.

  True, despite this beast’s bulk, it was awkward and not really suited to move on land. As a matter of fact, I’m sure that some able-bodied swordsman like Captain Drayton would have a reasonable chance of defeating this monstrosity. But this creature wouldn’t be facing off against a tall Captain of the Watch with his trusty sword.

  Nope. Not this lucky fellow.

  This giant from the depths was going to be squaring off against a pint-sized moron with delusions of heroism…and a big spoon.

  “GRRRRRROOOOOOORRRRRPP!” Ole Toothsome croaked happily as i
t started slide-waddling its way toward me.

  I fumbled desperately with the guide rope, trying to get it off my arm again so I could thread it through the loop in my own line. But, even as clumsy as the monster moved, we were in close quarters and it closed the distance between us rapidly. I realized I had no time to prepare my rope, attach it to the guide rope, and then attach the guide rope to the post. Instead I settled for jamming the loop of the guide rope down on the post and trying to back away.

  That’s when I discovered somebody had taken up the slack on the rope still attached to my belt.

  Uh oh…

  I understood then that the people up there had no idea about the situation down here, and were getting over-eager in their preparations while waiting for the order to retrieve me. If they started pulling now, they were going to drag me straight into the beast’s mouth.

  Ah, amateurs, mused the mental voice of Mr. Chance. Bless their well-meaning little hearts. Nice weapon, by the way. Did you get a punch bowl with that?

  “I know, I know…” I growled. “I brought this on myself. That’s not helping right now.”

  I gave up on the guide rope and went with a new plan.

  “Eat silvery death, you ugly bastard!”

  I brandished the spoon in the most menacing way I could muster, then took off at a sprint in an attempt to angle past the monster on the right. The creature matched my move with surprising speed, forcing me to dodge back and go left instead. Its jaws slammed shut about a foot away from me as it tried to curl back on itself.

  I made a backhand swing with the spoon as I leaped past its tail, then headed for the columned rim of the pool. The spoon connected right on the creature’s snout, and for a split second, it drew back in surprise. That brief second gave me the chance to be past it right before those jaws closed again, right behind me.

  I now had a straight shot at the pool.

  Having been forced to flee the post, I needed to be as close to the shaft as possible when they started pulling me up or I would be dragged across the floor…within easy reach of the monster.

  I reached the rim and started around the pool. It would be necessary to stay on the pool side of the columns to avoid fouling my rope. I also needed to put some distance between myself and the creature so I could disengage the rope from my belt, widen the loop, and put it under my arms properly.

  The problem was that Ole Toothsome hallumphed along right behind me. He was so close I could actually feel his breath on my back. This encouraged me to pick up my pace even more, and I managed to widen the distance between us as we went around the pool.

  As I came out from around the other side, I started to head for the post to make another frantic attempt at freeing the guide rope and attaching it to my line. That’s when I discovered somebody up top had continued taking up the slack in my rope back when I approached the pool.

  What a surprise, things had gotten worse.

  I now found myself locked in a tight orbit around the creature’s pool.

  A glance over my shoulder revealed that the abortive attempt to head for the post had allowed the creature to gain on me. I just had time to spy it leaning forward, jaws gaping wide. One of its bottom teeth actually brushed my back as I leaped forward, followed by the shocking sound of the monster’s mouth clomping shut directly behind me.

  This prompted another burst of speed.

  The last two years of leisurely breakfasts on my patio, relaxing coach rides to the bathhouse, and sumptuous dinners with clients had not been the best training for today’s activities. I was supposed to have put insanity like this behind me, so I had seen no need to keep myself in quite the shape I used to maintain. But apparently now that I was the new, reformed Cargill—bookseller, consultant to the Watch, and rescuer of small boys who fall down holes—it was going to behoove me to lose a few pounds. That was assuming I didn’t lose them all in one titanic “Clomp!” in the next few minutes.

  Yeah, my retirement was going swell.

  Then one of the most beautiful sounds I could imagine reached my ears—the sound of the creature starting to pant. The beast had begun to tire.

  A surge of hope gave new strength to my fear-powered legs. There appeared to be a chance that I might be able to live though this after all! The monster probably didn’t have to push its huge mass around at high speed on the surface very often. This thing had not been built for pursuit on land, and it didn’t usually have to chase its victims for any length of time.

  After two more laps, we were on opposite sides of the pool. At this point, the monster wasn’t the only one huffing and puffing.

  I paused to catch my breath.

  Across the pool, the creature also stopped.

  Its massive sides heaved, and its head bobbed with each breath. The thing didn’t appear to be in much better shape than me. Actually, it appeared to be exhausted. Not that I felt in much better shape, but I realized if I could tire this thing out some more then it would probably just give up and go home like any natural predator.

  “Grrrrrroooooooorrrrrrp!” it panted reproachfully at me.

  “Say that again, sir?” Grabel’s voice requested from above.

  What? When the hells had I ever said anything like “Grrrooorrp!” before?

  “Gra…bel…” I panted loudly, trying to get my breath back to tell him to give me some more slack in my rope so I could run this beast into the ground.

  “Pull!” I heard the manservant yell from above.

  Aw, crap.

  The rope jerked me off the ground and I launched into the air at an alarming speed. My arms and legs thrashed the air with futility as I was doubled over by the pull on my belt.

  The men up there must have been overcompensating now that they needed to pull up a grown man. And, of course, with all the running around I had been doing, nobody had the chance to re-measure the marks on how far they needed to pull…which probably explained why I still flew at full speed when I slammed backwards into the mouth of the shaft.

  Owwww…

  Since I couldn’t fit up the shaft doubled over, I must have jerked the men to halt in the garden above me. To their credit, they didn’t lose their grip on the rope and hung on to it tenaciously. On the other hand, this resulted in me being doubled over against the roof, my arms and legs hanging down, and my ass literally up a crack.

  Yep, next time some kid fell down a hole, I would be sending Grabel with that brick.

  “Grrrooorp?” the creature below croaked up at me in bewilderment.

  “Oh, shut up!” I snarled.

  I guess when you’re hanging from a ceiling with your butt stuffed up a hole, and you’re waving a spoon at some toothy horror, it sort of makes you take stock of life.

  I mused over where I went wrong, and how my straying from what I knew to be right and true in the world had led me to this unfortunate state. It had been risky and stupid to draw attention to myself in this mad fit of heroics—even riskier and twice as stupid to undertake a dangerous foray like this with only the help of inexperienced, upper-class neighbors as backup. And words fail to convey the idiocy of risking an incursion into what might be the Undercity, armed only with noble intentions and a large spoon.

  I was lucky I still featured a butt to plug ceiling holes with.

  Regardless, the time had come to leave. There would be ample opportunity to assign blame for this debacle later.

  “Grabel!”

  “Sir?” his voiced wafted from the regions somewhere behind my butt.

  “Give me two feet of slack.” I gritted. “Slowly.”

  “Yes, sir.”

  As the pressure against my middle eased, and my bottom started to lower out of the shaft, I used my legs to push off and put my arms back to catch the rim of the shaft behind me. This turned out to be another trick that had been easier in my younger days.

  There seemed to be more and more of those lately.

  Once I hung a little lower, I managed to align my body with the shaft. I looked
downwards to get one last look at the cistern, and the monster that had almost eaten me. The columns and post still stood mysterious in the dim lantern light from my belt, but of the monster there remained nothing to see but its tail sliding under the water.

  I guess it had had enough fun for one day.

  That made two of us.

  I reached up and grasped the rope above my head, in order to decrease the pull on my belt and to avoid binding me in the shaft. Above, at the other end of the shaft, a small gray rectangle of sky beckoned. I had forgotten how beautiful even the gloomiest forms of sunlight could be.

  With a final order up to Grabel to take things nice and slow, I was pulled from the darkness and back into the world.

  Chapter Six

  “In victory and mighty deeds does the great man find his nourishment. Then in women and sweet wine does he quench his thirst.” —Tolob’s Ethos of the North

  “So, I understand you are something of a hero now.”

  Captain Drayton leaned back in his chair on my upstairs patio, a mug of hot klavet steaming in his hand.

  He had visited this evening to find out what I knew of any bad blood between Rollok the Bear, who ran the gangs on Tallowpot Street along the Nur River, and Blind Jak Dobel. Blind Jak ran most of the illegal traffic on the Nur River itself. It seemed lately that bodies belonging to thugs from both factions had been turning up floating in the lower harbor.

  Rollok must have been trying to assert his old position that, since the bridges were his territory, Blind Jak should pay him toll to go under them. Needless to say, Blind Jak didn’t see it that way.

  I tried to explain to the Captain that this kind of thing was merely part of a normal cycle with those two, and as long as they stuck to only killing each other’s henchmen, it was best to let them work it out between themselves.

  They always seemed to in the end.

  Now that we had business out of the way, he felt conversational— and, of course, my antics of yesterday were the talk of the hill.