This Just In... (Harlequin Superromance)

by Jennifer Mckenzie

  Sadly, this bit of insight didn’t make the knowledge easier to bear.

  The fist of pain that had been Noah’s constant companion since she’d walked out of his life punched him in the chest, then followed up with a crosscheck to his lungs. He might look okay on the outside—sure, he was a little pale, but he could blame that on his long days of campaign planning—but inside he was a mass of bruises. He breathed through the attack.

  Sabrina was coming back.

  “Maybe you should take the rest of the day off,” Kyle said. “We’ll go to the lake, do some fishing.”

  Trout Lake would close for fishing at the end of the month, but Noah didn’t feel like taking advantage of that. “Can’t. Too much to do.”

  “Noah.”

  He didn’t look at his brother. Not really. He gave the impression of paying attention, looking in Kyle’s direction and pasting on a polite expression. He could even nod and murmur if necessary. But he couldn’t look at him. Couldn’t bear to see the compassion shining out of his brother’s eyes.

  He was the big brother. The one who was supposed to have everything figured out. Who didn’t call on others for help just in case he became a drain on them. Just in case he did something that caused them to push him away.

  That might be the thing that hurt most about Sabrina. That he’d let himself believe he didn’t have to pretend around her. That he could just let go. Except when he had, she’d pushed him away, too.

  The edges of his vision darkened. He blinked and sucked in some oxygen until the darkness receded. Never again. It was a hard lesson to learn, but best he learned now while he still had the opportunity to change. The next woman he dated would see only the perfect, mayoral side. The public side he showed to the world. And maybe she would stay.

  “Marissa thinks you need to talk.” Kyle held up a hand when Noah opened his mouth. “I told her to leave you alone, but you know how she is.”

  Noah did know. Kyle had managed to allow Noah some privacy in his professional office life, but his personal family life was a different story. Marissa had been a regular visitor to his apartment since Sabrina’s departure. Often with a kid or two in tow. Sometimes she brought dinners for him to stick in his freezer and heat up when he was hungry. Sometimes she came to help with the campaign. Occasionally she told him the kids needed some bonding time with their uncle and escaped, leaving them behind. But Noah knew those were all ruses. She was checking up on him to see if he was improving. And pushing—always with the pushing—urging him to talk about his feelings. “If she shows up, I’ll handle it.”

  “You sure?”

  He nodded once to let Kyle know he was okay, and waited until the door clicked shut behind his brother before he exhaled softly. Slowly, just in case anyone was listening.

  Sabrina was back. For a visit? Permanently? He realized those were questions he should have asked his brother. He could call him back and ask now, but the thought left him icy cold. Maybe it was better not to know. He should continue on with life as though her appearance made no difference to him. Because it shouldn’t.

  She’d left. Her position was clear. She didn’t want to be with him. He wasn’t good enough for her to stay.

  Noah hoped like hell she wasn’t planning to stay, wasn’t moving back into her old apartment. It would be much easier to ignore her presence if he wasn’t forced to live next door to her, the entryway filled with her perfume, her music acting as a soundtrack to his evenings.

  He had too much on his plate to let Sabrina’s return and the reasons behind it twist him up again. No, he was done with that phase of his life. A youthful indiscretion that would soon be a distant memory.

  Noah pushed up his shirtsleeves and got back to business.

  * * *

  BY THE TIME NOAH LEFT for home, he was beat. He’d stayed late on purpose, keeping his campaign team longer than necessary because he didn’t want to go home. His reasons would have been obvious to anyone who knew, but he’d heard no comments about Sabrina’s return, which had relaxed him a little.

  But as he neared the house, his anxiety reappeared. What if she was there already? What if she was waiting for him? He didn’t know what he would say. He didn’t want to talk to her, but how could he avoid her if she was living right beside him?

  He turned off his headlights before he turned up the driveway, hoping to slip in under the cover of night. The moon was high and bright and gave enough illumination for him to park without running into anything.

  When he saw her SUV sitting in its spot by the house, he gritted his teeth. So she was here. Or at least her car was.

  Noah crept up the porch steps, careful to hold the door tight to absorb the sound of his key turning in the lock. He could hear the drone of her TV before he had the door fully open. Lamplight spilled into the hallway from her apartment where she’d left the door propped open. Her red boots acted as the doorstop, a cheerful bastion greeting his arrival.

  Noah ignored the low pull in his belly at the sight of those boots. He should see them as a harbinger of doom, not great sex. He shut the front door behind him and told himself not to peek into her apartment. She might see it as a welcoming gesture, and that wasn’t something he was willing to give.

  But he couldn’t help a hurried glance. He told himself it was simply preparation. If she came barreling out, he wouldn’t be caught off guard. But that wasn’t the only reason.

  He wanted to see her. Wanted to see that sweep of dark hair, those big green eyes and those pretty red lips. Did she look as tired as he did? Had she been sleeping well? Did she regret her decision to go?

  What he saw was her crashed out on her couch, one hand tucked under her cheek, hair curled over her neck while the TV played in the background. She looked so angelic, a tiny smile on her lips as she dreamed. No one would ever guess she was the kind of person who could rip a man’s heart out, stomp all over it and then come back, expecting he’d simply ask for more.

  Noah quelled the urge to walk in and cover her with the blanket off the back of the couch. If she got cold, she’d wake up and do it herself. He didn’t owe her anything. Not even a warm blanket. And one night of shivering wouldn’t kill her.

  But once safely inside his own bed, he wasn’t able to sleep. He couldn’t help thinking of her sleeping over there, door wide open, with nothing and no one to protect her.

  Cursing, he got up and marched over. He didn’t take as much care with noise this time. If she wanted to talk, he had a few things to say. Namely that a man should be able to sleep in his own bed without worrying about his neighbor catching a cold or worse.

  Noah whipped the blanket over her. Sabrina didn’t rouse, didn’t even move as the blanket settled. He turned off the TV and locked the door behind him. Yes, he’d kept her key. He hadn’t meant to hang on to it. He just hadn’t been thinking about those kinds of details when she’d told him she was leaving. Once he realized he still had it, she’d already been gone for a week. He’d planned to give it to her parents when they came around to close up, but he hadn’t seen them. He should have dropped it in the mail or contacted them, but he hadn’t. He didn’t stop to think why that might be. The fact was, he still had it and it had come in handy.

  Noah climbed back into his own bed and closed his eyes, but sleep remained elusive. So when dawn rolled around, followed by a pounding on his door, he felt as cranky as a grizzly bear.

  He snarled as he flipped the lock. He knew who was behind it, making all that racket with her fists. Did she think he was deaf? He yanked the door open, forgetting that he was supposed to act as if he didn’t care. “What?”

  God, Sabrina looked good. Noah didn’t want to notice. Didn’t want to drink her in from her head to her toes. But he did anyway, gorging himself on her fresh-faced, bright-eyed appeal. Even her hair, messy with sleep, looked glorious to him, just begging a man t
o wrap his hands in it. He’d barely been able to stop himself from touching it last night, and he curled his fingers against his palms now.

  He didn’t want to think about how he looked. Exhausted and beat up, like he’d spent the night tossing and turning in between bouts of punching his pillow into a different shape as though that might be the culprit for his insomnia.

  Sabrina smiled and his heart thumped. “Hi.”

  Hi? Just a couple of neighbors saying good morning? “Hi.” He returned the greeting, curt and abrupt. The tone of a man who didn’t have time for simple pleasantries because he had bigger and better things on his schedule. “Need something?”

  Her smile dimmed. Good. Noah reminded himself he had no reason to feel guilty. He hadn’t done anything wrong, and if Sabrina regretted her choices, she could learn to live with them, the same way he was doing. She clasped her hands in front of her. “I...I hoped we could talk.”

  She hoped they could talk. How nice for her. How nice to think that a brief little chat was part of her plan today. Too bad—it wasn’t part of his. “I don’t have time today.”

  Her brow wrinkled slightly. “Tonight then?”

  “Busy.” And if he wasn’t, he’d find something to do.

  “Okay, tomorrow. I’ll take you out for coffee. I know you have time for that.”

  Noah’s resolve didn’t waver. He couldn’t be weak around this woman, the one who’d gotten behind his defenses and made him think that she would stay. That he was worth staying for. “It’s not a good time right now.” He stopped short of saying her name, afraid that hearing it slip from his lips would shatter the thin shield of protection around him.

  “Oh.” He saw the realization register. She tried again anyway. “When would be a good time? This is important.”

  “Not to me.”

  Surprise then pain flashed across her face. He schooled his features into polite boredom. He would not crumble, would not let her know she still had the ability to dig into his heart. He had to protect himself. “Noah.”

  “I need to get ready for work,” he told her. His hands were clenched so tight that he wouldn’t have been shocked to find the nails had broken skin.

  “But...”

  But nothing. Noah stared at her. She didn’t finish her sentence.

  “Well, I wanted you to know that I’m back.” She slowed and took a breath. Her eyes met his and her voice quieted. “I quit my job in the city.”

  Goodie for her. He didn’t say a word.

  “I wanted you to know that.”

  “And now I do.” He didn’t shift, not even a millimeter. What did it matter if Sabrina was back? Nothing had changed between them. Nothing at all.

  “Okay.” He saw her throat bob as she swallowed. “Then I guess I’ll let you get back to dressing.”

  Noah looked down at his bare chest and boxers. Hell, he hadn’t even thought to grab a pair of sweatpants or a shirt. It was her. Sabrina confused him, made him disregard the image he’d worked so hard to create. He hated that. More than ever he needed to cloak himself in that armor of perfection. And in less than twenty-four hours, she’d already managed to make him forget.

  “Noah?” He didn’t want to look at her. Did his trick of looking just past her, letting his gaze fix on something in the distance. “I hope you’ll be willing to talk to me soon. I know that things...” She shook her head. “I’d like to talk. When you’re ready.”

  Like he just needed a few more days to get over it. That everything would be well and good if she gave him another day, a week, a month. Noah didn’t think it would ever be well and good between them again. But he didn’t say that. He didn’t say anything. Just mumbled something noncommittal and watched as she headed back to her own apartment.

  She still had that swing in her step. The one that made her ass look absolutely delectable. He knew he shouldn’t be watching, shouldn’t be punishing himself by viewing what he couldn’t have. But he did, not closing his own door until she was safely behind hers.

  He let his head rest against the cool wood. Sabrina had quit her job. The hope he’d been fighting tried to blossom. He hoed it back. She hadn’t said she’d quit for him, hadn’t said she’d come back for him. She’d just said she was back. Maybe all she wanted to talk about was how they could move forward as friends, so that living beside each other wouldn’t be horribly awkward when she wanted to bring someone new home.

  Noah’s stomach roiled at the thought. He swallowed the burn working its way up his throat. She could bring back any man she wanted, and do whatever she wanted with him. It had nothing to do with him if she wanted to ride some new sucker like a cowgirl on that beautiful big bed of hers.

  But she’d better not wear the boots if she did.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  WELL, THAT HADN’T gone as planned. Sabrina rubbed at the numbness creeping up her neck and over her ears. Not that she’d expected Noah to throw open his door and invite her in for a cup of coffee. Okay, that would have been nice, but she was reasonable.

  She just hadn’t anticipated the crushing coldness. The flinty look in his eyes and small sneer on his mouth as though he couldn’t believe she was wasting his time. She wasn’t wasting his time. Didn’t he understand he was part of the reason she’d come back? That he’d shown her all she’d missed out on for the past nine years and she didn’t want to miss the next nine?

  She sighed. She was back now and she wasn’t going anywhere. She’d made sure of that, telling her Vancouver editor that she wouldn’t be party to a fabricated story about the young actress and when he threatened her with dismissal, she’d told him not to bother because she quit.

  But it meant she was unemployable at her old paper and probably any other in the city, too. The industry wasn’t large and word of her difficult behavior would certainly make its way around. She shoved the thought away. She didn’t care. She had no intention of going back.

  Although she’d been here less than a day, arriving yesterday afternoon with the furniture and boxes she’d never bothered to unpack, Sabrina already felt more at home than she had the past few weeks in Vancouver. Even that little pinch behind her heart was gone. Yes, she’d done the right thing.

  Now she just had to convince Noah.

  Satisfied that at least their reconnection hadn’t devolved into painful accusations, she turned on her coffeemaker. If spending the night on the couch didn’t earn her a strong pot, she didn’t know what would. Then she hurried to the shower, shedding clothes as she went. She sang a little as she turned on the spray and waited for it to heat up.

  Yes, coming home had been the right move. Of course, it would be better if Noah were with her right now, kissing the side of her neck and telling her all the delightful areas he planned to wash for her, but all in good time.

  He still cared about her. She was sure of it. Why else would he have taken care of her last night?

  Sabrina might have dragged the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped herself up in it while still sleeping. She might have even woken up long enough to turn off the TV and then fallen back asleep without remembering. But there was no way she’d climbed off the couch, traipsed over to the door, moved her red boots and locked up. Her boots had been placed neatly beside the door, toes pointed toward the wall, heels perfectly even. No, that was all Noah. Which meant that icy facade and brusque manner had just been an attempt to hide his real feelings.

  She hurried through her shower. She was due at the coffee shop in twenty minutes. Her parents had been thrilled when she’d called to tell them she was coming back and had happily agreed to let her move back into the apartment, which they had yet to rent out. Then they’d happily informed her she could start at the coffee shop as soon as she arrived.

  She yanked a comb through her wet hair. Not because she was so desperate to get to the kitchen, the rich
aroma of the now ready coffee filling the apartment, but because she couldn’t wait to start her new life.

  Sabrina gave herself a quick hug. Today, she would reintroduce herself to Wheaton and show them that she meant to stay.

  * * *

  “HE’S BEING DIFFICULT,” Sabrina complained to Marissa over coffee two days later. She’d spent the morning at the newspaper office and was covering the afternoon shift at the coffee shop, but she’d decided she needed a break. The shop was slow between two and three anyway. “He wouldn’t even accept a coffee from me this morning.”

  And after she’d made him a cup to go. Didn’t he know that not everyone was treated to a morning cup of coffee, Sabrina style?

  She’d waited by her door, travel mug in hand, until she’d heard Noah’s door open. Then she’d walked out, too. He’d thanked her for the thought, but declined the cup.

  “It’s frustrating.”

  “I know.” Marissa had one eye on Scotty who was rolling a toy truck across the wooden floor a couple of tables over, unaware that the other patrons had to step over and around him. Timmy slept against Marissa’s shoulder. Paul and Daisy were still at school. “I told you, you broke him.”

  “I did not break him.” Sabrina took a sip of the latte in front of her in hopes it might calm her nerves. It didn’t. She put the cup down hard enough that the liquid splashed up and over the rim. “Aren’t you supposed to be on my side?” she asked as she mopped up the mess.

  “I am?”

  “Yes.” Wasn’t it obvious? “You didn’t let up on me when I was away. ‘When are you coming back? I miss you. The kids miss you.’” She crumpled the soiled napkins into a ball.