Delphi Collected Works of W. Somerset Maugham (Illustrated)
Page 361
Alec.
[Beginning to lose his temper.] Don’t make an ass of yourself, Bobby.
Boulger.
By God, I’ll make you answer!
[As he says this he goes up to Alec furiously, but Alec. with a twist of his arm, hurls him back.
Alec.
I could break your back, you silly boy.
[With a cry of anger Boulger is about to spring at Alec when Dick gets in the way.
Dick.
Now then, no scenes. And you’ll only get the worst of it, Bobby. Alec could just crumple you up. Take him away, Mallins. Don’t stand there like a stuffed owl, Carbery.
Boulger.
Let me alone, you fool!
Mallins.
Come along, old chap.
Boulger.
[To Alec.] You damned skunk!
Dick.
Now then, be off with you. Don’t make a silly ass of yourself.
[Boulger, Mallins and Carbery go out.
Dick.
Poor Lady Kelsey! To-morrow half London will be saying that you and Bobby had a stand-up fight in her drawing-room.
Alec.
[Furiously.] The damned cubs!
Dick.
The position is growing confoundedly awkward!
Alec.
They lick my boots till I loathe them, and then they turn against me like a pack of curs. Oh, I despise them — these silly boys who stay at home wallowing in their ease while men work. Thank God, I’ve done with them all now. They think one can fight one’s way through Africa as easily as one walks down Piccadilly. They think one goes through hardships and dangers, illness and starvation, to be the lion of a dinner-party in Mayfair.
Dick.
My dear Alec, keep calm.
Alec.
[With a visible effort containing himself completely, with studied nonchalance.] D’you think that I look wildly excited?
Dick.
[Ironically.] I don’t think butter would melt in your mouth.
[Dick and Alec go out into the garden. In a moment Boulger comes in with Lady Kelsey.
Boulger.
Thank heaven, there’s nobody here.
Lady Kelsey.
I think you’re dreadfully foolish, Bobby. You know how Lucy resents any interference with her actions.
Boulger.
Won’t you sit down? You must be dreadfully tired.
Lady Kelsey.
Why won’t you wait till to-morrow?
Boulger.
I feel that it ought to be settled at once.
[Lucy appears.
Lucy.
Did you send for me, my aunt? Mr. Carbery said you wanted to speak to me here.
Lady Kelsey.
Yes, I gave him that message.
Boulger.
I asked Aunt Alice to beg you to come here. I was afraid you wouldn’t if I asked you.
Lucy.
[Lightly.] What nonsense! I’m always delighted to see you.
Boulger.
I wanted to speak to you about something, and I thought Aunt Alice should be present.
Lucy.
Is it so important that it can’t wait till to-morrow?
Boulger.
I venture to think it’s very important.
Lucy.
[Smiling.] I’m all attention.
[He hesitates for a moment, then braces himself to the ordeal.
Boulger.
I’ve told you often, Lucy, that I’ve been in love with you for as many years as I can remember.
Lucy.
Surely you’ve not snatched me from the unwilling arm of my partner in order to make me a proposal of marriage?
Boulger.
I’m perfectly serious, Lucy.
Lucy.
[Smiling.] I assure you it doesn’t suit you at all.
Boulger.
The other day I asked you again to marry me, just before Alec Mackenzie came back.
Lucy.
It was very charming of you. You mustn’t think that because I laugh at you a little I’m not grateful for your affection.
Boulger.
Except for that letter in this morning’s Times, I should never have dared to say anything to you again. But that changes everything.
Lucy.
I don’t understand what you mean.
Boulger.
[After a little pause.] I ask you again if you’ll be my wife? When Alec Mackenzie came back I understood why you were so indifferent to me, but you can’t marry him now.
Lucy.
You have no right to talk to me like this.
Boulger.
I’m the only man who’s related to you at all, and I love you with my whole soul.
Lady Kelsey.
I think you should listen to him, Lucy. I’m growing old, and soon you’ll be quite alone in the world.
Boulger.
I don’t ask you to care for me. I only want to serve you.
Lucy.
I can only repeat that I’m very grateful to you. I can never marry you.
Boulger.
[Beginning to lose his temper again.] Are you going to continue to know Mackenzie? If you’ll take the advice of any unprejudiced person about that letter, you’ll find that he’ll say the same as I. There can be no shadow of doubt that Mackenzie is guilty of a monstrous crime.
Lucy.
I don’t care what the evidence is. I know he can’t have done a shameful thing.
Boulger.
But have you forgotten that it’s your own brother he killed? The whole country is up in arms against him, and you are quite indifferent.
Lucy.
[Much moved.] Oh, Bobbie, how can you be so cruel?
Boulger.
If you ever really cared for George at all, you must wish to punish the man who caused his death.
Lucy.
Oh, why d’you torment me? I tell you that he isn’t guilty. It’s because I’m convinced of that ...
Boulger.
[Interrupting.] But have you asked him?
Lucy.
No.
Boulger.
He might give you the truth.
Lucy.
I couldn’t do that.
Boulger.
Why not?
Lady Kelsey.
It’s very strange that he should insist on this silence.
Lucy.
Do you believe that story too?
Lady Kelsey.
I don’t know what to believe. It’s so extraordinary. If the man’s innocent, why doesn’t he speak?
Lucy.
He knows I trust him. I couldn’t cause him the great pain of asking him questions.
Boulger.
Are you afraid he couldn’t answer them?
Lucy.
No, no, no!
Boulger.
Well, just try. After all, you owe as much as that to the memory of George.
Lady Kelsey.
I think it’s very unreasonable, Lucy. He knows we’re his friends. He can count on our discretion.
Lucy.
I believe in him implicitly. I believe in him with all the strength I’ve got.
Boulger.
Then, surely it can make no difference if you ask him. There can be no reason for him not to trust you.
Lucy.
Oh, why don’t you leave me alone?
Boulger.
Ask him point blank. If he refuses to answer you ...
Lucy.
[Hastily.] It would mean nothing. Why should he answer? I believe in him absolutely. I think he’s the greatest and most honourable man I’ve ever known. I care more for his little finger than for the whole world. I love him with all my heart. And that’s why he can’t be guilty of this horrible crime. Because I’ve loved him for years, and he’s known it. And he loves me. And he’s loved me always.
[Alec and Dick stroll in from the garden.
Lucy.
Alec, Alec, I want you! Thank God, you’ve come!
[Going to her quickly.] What is it?
Lucy.
Alec, you must tell them now about you and me.
[Alec looks at Lucy for a moment, and then turns to Lady Kelsey.
Alec.
I think perhaps we ought to have told you before, Lady Kelsey. But we wanted to enjoy our little secret by ourselves.
Lady Kelsey.
I’m afraid to understand.
Alec.
I have asked Lucy to be my wife, and she....
Lucy.
[Interrupting him.] She said she would be honoured and deeply grateful.
Lady Kelsey.
[Greatly embarrassed.] I hardly know what to say.... How long have you been engaged?
Lucy.
Won’t you tell me you’re pleased, my aunt? I know you want me to be happy.
Lady Kelsey.
Of course, I want you to be happy. But I — I....
[Boulger turns on his heel and walks out.
Dick.
[Offering his arm to Lady Kelsey.] Wouldn’t you like to go back to the drawing-room?
[She allows herself to be led away, helplessly.
Alec and Lucy are left alone.
Alec.
[With a smile.] I don’t think our announcement has been received with enthusiasm.
Lucy.
You’re not angry with me, Alec?
Alec.
Of course not. Everything you do is right and charming.
Lucy.
I shall really think I’m a wonderful person if I’ve taught you to pay compliments.
Alec.
I’m so glad to be alone with you. Now, at all events, people will have the sense to leave us by ourselves.
Lucy.
[Passionately.] I want your love. I want your love so badly.
Alec.
[Taking her in his arms.] My darling!
Lucy.
[Clinging to him.] The moment I’m with you I feel so confident and happy.
Alec.
Only when you’re with me? [Lucy looks at him for an instant. He repeats the question in a caressing voice.] Only when you’re with me, darling?
Lucy.
Why d’you think I made you tell them we were engaged?
Alec.
You took me by surprise.
Lucy.
I had to tell them. I couldn’t keep it back. They made me suffer so dreadfully.
Alec.
The brutes! Tell me what they did.
Lucy.
Oh, they said horrible things about you.
Alec.
No more than that?
Lucy.
It’s nothing to you. But to me.... Oh, you don’t know what agony I endure. I’m such a coward! I thought I was so much braver.
Alec.
I don’t understand you.
Lucy.
I wanted to burn my ships behind me. I wanted to reassure myself. [Alec makes a slight movement away from her, but she holds him back anxiously.] Forgive me, dear. You don’t know how terrible it is. I stand so dreadfully alone. Every one is convinced that you caused poor George’s death — every one but me. [Alec looks at her gravely, without speaking.] I try to put the thoughts out of my head, but I can’t — I can’t. That letter in the Times looks so dreadfully true. Don’t you see what I mean? The uncertainty is more than I can bear. At the first moment I felt so absolutely sure of you.
Alec.
And now you don’t?
Lucy.
I trust you just as much as ever. I know it’s impossible that you should have done a shameful thing. But there it stands in black and white, and you have nothing to say in answer.
Alec.
I know it’s very difficult. That is why I asked you to believe in me.
Lucy.
I do, Alec — with all my soul. But have mercy on me. I’m not so strong as I thought. It’s easy for you to stand alone. You’re iron, but I’m a weak woman.
Alec.
Oh, no, you’re not like other women. I was proud of your unconquerable spirit.
Lucy.
It was easy to be brave where my father was concerned, and George, but you’re the man I love, and it’s so different. I don’t know any more how to stand alone.
[Alec looks at her, thinking, but does not reply
for a moment.
Alec.
Do you remember that only an hour ago I told you that I’d done nothing which I wouldn’t do again? I gave you my word of honour that I could reproach myself for nothing.
Lucy.
Oh, I know. I’m so utterly ashamed of myself. But I can’t bear the doubt.
Alec.
Doubt! You’ve said the word at last.
Lucy.
I tell every one that I don’t believe a word of these horrible charges, and I repeat to myself: I’m certain, I’m certain that he’s innocent. And yet at the bottom of my heart there’s a doubt, and I can’t crush it.
Alec.
Is that why you told them we were engaged to be married?
Lucy.
I wanted to kill that gnawing pain of suspicion. I thought if I stood up before them and cried out that my trust in you was so great, I was willing to marry you notwithstanding everything, I should at least have peace in my own heart.
[Alec walks up and down. Then he stops in
front of Lucy.
Alec.
What is it precisely you want me to do?
Lucy.
I want you to have mercy on me because I love you. Don’t tell the world if you choose not to, but tell me the truth. I know you’re incapable of lying. If I only have it from your own lips I shall believe, I want to be certain, certain!
Alec.
Don’t you realise that I would never have asked you to marry me if my conscience hadn’t been quite clear? Don’t you realise that the reasons I have for holding my tongue must be of overwhelming strength?
Lucy.
But I am going to be your wife, and I love you, and you love me.
Alec.
I implore you not to insist, Lucy. Let us remember only that the past is gone and we love one another. It’s impossible for me to tell you anything.
Lucy.
Oh, but you must now. If any part of the story is true, you must give me a chance of judging for myself.
Alec.
I’m very sorry, I can’t.
Lucy.
But you’ll kill my love for you. The doubt which lurked at the bottom of my soul now fills me. How can you let me suffer such maddening torture?
Alec.
I thought you trusted me.
Lucy.
I’ll be satisfied if you’ll only tell me one thing: only tell me that when you sent George on that expedition you didn’t know that he’d be killed. [Alec looks at her steadily.] Only say that, Alec. Say that’s not true, and I’ll believe you.
Alec.
[Very quietly.] But it is true.
[Lucy does not answer, but stares at him with
terrified eyes.
Lucy.
Oh, I don’t understand. Oh, my dearest, don’t treat me as a child. Have mercy on me! You must be serious now. It’s a matter of life and death to both of us.
Alec.
I’m perfectly serious.
Lucy.
You knew that you were sending George into a death-trap? You knew he couldn’t escape alive?
Alec.
Except by a miracle.
Lucy.
And you don’t believe in miracles?
Alec.
No.
Lucy.
Oh, it can’t be true. Oh, Alec, Alec, Alec! Oh, what shall I do?
Alec.
I tell you that whatever I did was inevitable.
Lucy.
Then if that’s true, the rest must be true also. Oh, it’s awful. I can’t realise it. Haven’t you anything to say at all?
Alec.
[In a
low voice.] Only that I’ve loved you always with all my soul.
Lucy.
You knew how much I loved my brother. You knew how much it meant to me that he should live to wipe out my father’s dishonour. All the future was centred on him, and you sacrificed him.
Alec.
[Hesitatingly.] I think I might tell you this. He had committed a grave error of judgment. We were entrapped by the Arabs, and our only chance of escape entailed the almost certain death of one of us.
[An inkling of the truth seizes Lucy, and her
face is suddenly distorted with horror. She
goes up to him impulsively. Her voice
trembles with emotion.
Lucy.
Alec, Alec, he didn’t do something — unworthy? You’re not trying to shield him?
Alec.
[Hoarsely.] No, no, no!
Lucy.
[With a gasp of relief, almost to herself.] Thank God! I couldn’t have borne that. [To Alec, hopelessly.] Then I don’t understand.
Alec.
It was not unjust that he should suffer for the catastrophe which he had brought about.
Lucy.
At those times one doesn’t think of justice. He was so young, so frank. Wouldn’t it have been nobler to give your life for his?
Alec.
Oh, my dear, you don’t know how easy it is to give one’s life. How little you know me! Do you think I should have hesitated if my death had been sufficient to solve the difficulty? I had my work to do. I was bound by solemn treaties to the surrounding tribes. It would have been cowardly for me to die. I tell you, my death would have meant the awful death of every man in my party.
Lucy.
I can only see one thing, that you took George, George of all others.
Alec.
I knew at the time that what I did might cost me your love, and though you won’t believe this, I did it for your sake.
[At this moment Mrs. Crowley enters with
Sir Robert Boulger. She has a cloak on.
Mrs. Crowley.
I was just coming to say good-night. Bobby is going to drive me home. [She suddenly notices Lucy’s agitation.] What on earth’s the matter?
[Lady Kelsey and Dick Lomas come in. Lady
Kelsey looks at Lucy and then goes up to
her impulsively.
Lady Kelsey.
Lucy, Lucy!
Lucy.
[Brokenly.] I’m no longer engaged to Mr. Mackenzie. He can’t deny that what is said about him is true.
[They look at him in astonishment, but he makes
no movement.
Mrs. Crowley.
[To Alec.] Haven’t you anything to say at all? You must have some explanation to offer?
Alec.
No, I have none whatever.
Dick.
Alec, old man, have you realised all that this means?