Magic and Mayhem: A Collection of 21 Fantasy Novels

by Jasmine Walt

  “No…” I muttered, and before I could stop myself, I was sprinting across the parking lot of the gas station as fast as I could. I made it about three feet before a loud honk filled my ears. I glanced toward it in time to see an old brown station wagon plow into me at ten miles an hour. It smacked into my ribs so hard I was reminded of the time I’d been punched in the side by a yeti. My breath exploded from my lips as I flopped sideways onto the concrete. The sound of people shouting filled my ears. The vehicle lurched to a stop as I lay there, struggling to breathe.

  It’d hurt less than I’d expected, but then again, when you’re used to getting thrown twenty feet through the air by werewolves, well, what was a car? I tried to move, tried to crawl to my feet but everything was sort of hazy and far off. I shut my eyes, pulling in a deep breath, but when I opened them again, everything was still shaky. That wasn’t good. Maybe I’d been hurt worse than I’d thought.

  An old woman with hair the color of fresh snow and glasses that made her eyes appear huge and bug-like hobbled over to me, yammering in some language I didn’t understand. Only… only I couldn’t even hear her voice very well. Her lips were moving… how come I couldn’t hear her?

  I was about to ask when hands gripped me under my arms and hauled me to my feet like I weighed nothing, which wasn’t exactly true. I might have only been five feet tall, but I was almost a hundred and twenty pounds of muscle. I tried to kick and fight, but before I could land even a single blow, Luc leaned in close and whispered into my ear.

  “Let’s get out of here before the police come,” Luc said, and his voice was warm on my neck. “Something tells me that won’t go well for you.”

  He smiled at me as he tucked one arm around my shoulder and began hustling me away from the lady. I wasn’t sure where I was going exactly, but it didn’t matter. He was right. I did not want the police finding me. If they did, they’d want all sorts of things I wouldn’t be able to give them, like identification and my parents’ phone numbers.

  2

  We were sitting in a restaurant I’d never been to before which wasn’t that surprising since I’d never actually eaten in a restaurant on Earth before. I’d tried to tell Luc I didn’t have any money, but he’d insisted. So we were here even though I couldn’t afford anything. Everything smelled so good, I could feel my mouth water. Maybe I could just order water? I’d remembered reading something about water being free in American restaurants, but maybe I wasn’t remembering things correctly? Either way, I’d have to do something or the smell of food was going to drive me insane.

  I’d never been the world’s best student, especially when it came to Earth’s studies courses. There were tons of countries, all with their own customs and things. Besides, most of our lessons usually revolved around how to deal with supernatural shenanigans, like say chasing a vampire through a blood bank or paying a mortician to forget a zombie really had tried to eat him. I’d had exactly one hour of class time pertaining to restaurants which isn’t very long when you consider how many countries had restaurants…

  “So what will you two be having to drink?” asked a lady with short brown hair and eyes that seemed way older than they should have since she looked only a few years older than I did. She shifted in annoyance, tapping her plastic blue pen against a green pad of paper in her hands as her gaze shifted from Luc to me. Her eyes lingered on my soft lavender hair before she glanced back at Luc and raised an eyebrow at him. The gesture made my cheeks heat up. Was there something wrong with my hair? Even among my people colored hair was pretty rare, so I usually dyed mine, but I hadn’t had time before I’d made my escape. Hopefully, it hadn’t been a huge mistake.

  “I’ll have coffee, the whole pot,” Luc said before gesturing at me. “What would you like to drink?”

  “Um… water, I think,” I said, looking down at the menu on the table. I had glanced through the drink section, but hadn’t seen water with a price listed next to it. Should I ask how much it was? No, then I’d seem like an idiot. Still, if it cost money, I wouldn’t be able to pay.

  “You think?” the lady asked, raising one eyebrow at me.

  “Occasionally,” I replied, smiling sweetly. “Though usually I get distracted by shiny objects.”

  Luc laughed as the waitress shook her head and walked away, her black tennis shoes squeaking across the dirty linoleum floor. Watching her go made me a little jealous because her jeans fit her way better than mine fit me. Then again, hers probably hadn’t come from a thrift store, so there was that…

  “Let’s start this over,” Luc said, grinning as he ran one chocolate-colored hand over his bald head before holding it out toward me. “I’m Luc and you are?”

  “I’m Lillim,” I replied, staring at his hand, unsure of what to do. So I copied him. I ran one hand through my short hair before holding it out across the table like he was doing. He glanced at my hand for a second then shifted his gaze back at me and chewed on his lip.

  “Are you messing with me?” he asked, staring at my hand like it somehow offended him. I fidgeted and retracted my hand before dropping it into my lap as I looked sheepishly at the table’s brightly-colored top.

  “I don’t know what you mean by that,” I whispered as my cheeks burst into flames. “I… um… I was trying to return your gesture.”

  “It’s called a handshake,” he said slowly. “It’s how we say hello.” He flung himself back against his seat as he shook his head. Clearly, he didn’t actually want to shake my hand so I retracted it and dropped it into my lap. His eyes followed me, and he flushed slightly, embarrassment clouding his features. “Sorry. I don’t really know much about you guys. Dirge is the only Dioscuri I’ve ever met…” He left the “and she seemed pretty normal” part of his statement unsaid, but at least he had the decency to look like he meant the apology. That was something. I guess.

  “It’s okay,” I squeaked, ashamed I didn’t know more as I stared down at my hands. Dirge had been an earthborn after all. She would have known how to act before she’d been recruited to hunt monsters by my people, the Dioscuri. Sometimes it seemed like all the knowledge she’d passed down to me was useless. It sort of pissed me off.

  “Look, I’m not trying to make you feel bad,” he said as the waitress came up to us and placed a big glass container filled with black liquid on the table along with two white mugs. Then she put a glass of water with three pathetic looking ice cubes drifting inside of it in front of me.

  “Thank you,” I said because good manners never really go out of style.

  “You’re welcome.” She smiled, though it didn’t reach her hazel eyes and pursed her lips. “What would you two like for breakfast?”

  “Two specials,” Luc said, tapping the menu in front of him with one dark finger. “And a side of pancakes with extra syrup.”

  “Anything else?” she asked, writing furiously on her little pad and though I could see the words, they didn’t make any sense to me. Maybe she had her own little code?

  “Orange juice. That will be all.”

  “Two specials, pancakes with extra syrup, and an orange juice?” she repeated back to him and he nodded.

  She turned and walked off without even looking at me which was a little odd. I mean part of me was relieved she hadn’t asked me what I’d wanted because I wouldn’t have known, but still… I smirked in spite of myself and decided to chalk it up to finally accruing some good karma. I’d been spared an opportunity to humiliate myself in front of Luc even further.

  I mean, after this meeting, I was going to go to another town stat, but I still didn’t like embarrassing myself if I could help it. I wasn’t sure why since most of my people tended to shrug it off when they did things they weren’t supposed to around normal people, but it’d always bugged me, like something deep inside knew I was behaving incorrectly.

  “I took the liberty of ordering for you. I hope you don’t mind,” he said, and when I looked at him, I must have had a strange look on my face because he hastily added
. “I didn’t know if you’d know what you wanted and…”

  “Thanks,” I said, feeling my cheeks heat up. “I appreciate it, but I don’t have enough money to eat here.” I swallowed, about to say more when he held up one hand. I spoke anyway. “I can’t pay for this.”

  “You can work it off. How’s that sound?” He smiled at me, showing a mouthful of white teeth. “Then I wouldn’t be helping you per se, it would be you getting payment for a job. You know, freelancing.”

  “I already told you I can’t help you.” I sighed, letting my breath out slowly as I scooted toward the edge of the booth so I could make a run for it if I needed to do so. “I can’t use my magic down here… if I did…” I stopped, trailing off as I realized I was blabbering to this guy. I barely knew him. I didn’t need to tell him anything, let alone spill my life story to him. Besides, he’d known Dirge. If that wasn’t a strike against him, I didn’t know what would be. Then again, he couldn’t have known her very well since I didn’t know a thing about him…

  “I don’t need you to do any magic, Lillim,” he replied, pouring the dark liquid into each of the mugs before stirring a bunch of white powder and what looked like milk into one of the cups. Then he slid the mug with the new mixture toward me. “I just need you to give me some information, like a consultant.”

  “I don’t know what that is,” I said, glancing at the cup full of steaming brown liquid.

  “It’s coffee. It’s the nectar of the gods. It’s pretty much as close to magic as us humans can get.” He smirked at me and picked up the first cup which was black as coal and took a sip. “It has the ability to turn near-corpses into functioning humans with a single sip.”

  “I meant, I don’t know what a consultant would do in this circumstance,” I replied, hesitantly lifting the cup and sniffing it. Just the smell was enough to wake me up. Was it some kind of stimulant? “Why did you put stuff in mine and not yours?”

  “It takes a while to get used to drinking it black. You’ll like it better that way.” He grinned at me. “And you would just consult on a problem I have.”

  “Well, that’s real helpful.” I glowered at him before sipping the drink. It was strangely sweet and acrid at the same time. I plastered a polite smile on my face before setting it down. “Yum,” I added for effect even though I was pretty sure he was trying to poison me.

  He watched me set the cup down with his large brown eyes, but something told me he didn’t buy my reaction. “Basically, I need you to teach me about vampires so I can kill the ones who have taken over this town.” He took a swig of his coffee. “Every time it seems like I learn something it turns out to be wrong. That’s why when I saw you, and realized what you were, I decided to follow you.”

  “You know following young girls around is not usually an endearing trait,” I muttered and he had the good sense to look sheepish. His mouth opened and closed for a second, trying to assimilate my words into his brain. “Besides, your story doesn’t make a lot of sense. Surely, my people have kept your entire town from being overrun by vampires. We’re magic-wilding demon hunters tasked with keeping Earth safe. That’s our job.”

  “If you guys were the only ones fighting monsters, why do I have a writ?” he asked, completely serious, but something about the way he looked at me told me he was having a hard time not yelling at me. Not that it would do him much good. Was that why he didn’t? Points for him. My mother still hadn’t learned yelling at me got her somewhere between nowhere and zilch.

  “Fair enough,” I replied. My stomach gurgled, and I glanced back at the coffee so hungry, I was about to down the stuff regardless of the fact it tasted like battery acid. One more sip wouldn’t hurt… but if I started accepting his stuff, I’d be obligated to help him. Still, what harm would a little information do? Besides, I was starving. “What do you want to know?”

  The words had barely left my mouth when he reached into his jacket and pulled out a pad of paper with a ratty green cover half torn from its metal spirals. He pulled a blue pen from between the spirals and flipped a few pages over, scanning them before stopping on a specific page.

  When he caught me watching him, his cheeks flushed slightly. “Sorry, I’ve been writing down questions for a while. When us hunters meet in the field we trade information, half of which is usually bogus, but I write it all down anyway.”

  I waved him off because I already knew generic human monster hunters shared notes. It was a little sad because if we prepared them better, they wouldn’t die as much. Some of the other Dioscuri had argued for better training for hunters with writs because it’d lead to fewer monsters, but we simply didn’t have the resources for that any more. Not since the last civil war had taken the lives of so many Dioscuri, including his sponsor Dirge Meilan. Besides, who wants to teach a monster hunting class? I sure didn’t.

  “You know, I haven’t actually agreed to help you yet,” I said even though I was leaning toward it. If what I said got spread out among a lot of hunters, it might save lives both by keeping hunters from getting killed and by helping them stop monsters from harming innocents. I ought to do it, but what if someone found him and asked how he found out what he did?

  “You know you want to help me,” he replied. “I can see it in your eyes, Lillim. You’re a good person. Good people don’t let others get killed when all they have to do is eat a nice breakfast for free and share some information.”

  I glared at him. How did he know I was a nice person? I wasn’t. None of the Dioscuri were nice people. We were demon hunters, trained from birth to kill. It sounded high and mighty, but I’d done some dark things. No, he had no right to call me good. Still, maybe sharing my knowledge him would help, maybe not a lot, maybe just the barest sliver, but if it did, shouldn’t I try?

  “Go ahead and ask your questions, but if anyone asks, tell them you learned it from Dirge,” I said as the waitress came over and slid several plates onto the table before leaving in a huff of annoyance. I got the distinct feeling she wasn’t especially pleased with her job, although I wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t like she had to contend with werewolves trying to eat her liver on a monthly basis.

  The smell of the food made my stomach rumble again, and it was all I could do to keep from tearing into the meal. “But you may need more food.”

  He nodded at me as I grabbed a handful of crinkled meat from my plate and shoved it into my mouth. It was like heaven. “What is this?” I asked around the mouthful as he made a note in his book.

  “Bacon,” he replied, smirking at me. “Good, eh?”

  “Bacon, where have you been all my life?” I said, picking up another piece and chewing on it.

  He laughed and shifted in his seat. “Anyway, maybe this would be easier if you could just give me a rundown of very basic supernatural knowledge.”

  I shrugged as I stabbed something that looked like an egg with my fork and shoved it into my mouth. I chewed and swallowed before taking a sip of my coffee. The beverage seemed a lot better with food.

  “Um… okay.” I shrugged, trying to think of the best way to start. “Let’s begin with vampires since that’s what you claim has invaded your town. There are a couple of kinds, the ones who drink blood and the ones your kind refer to as succubae.”

  “How do you kill them?” he asked, staring at me intently. Ah, the million dollar question.

  “Cut off their head or light them on fire. That will kill most things. When in doubt, cut off its head and light it on fire.” I was about to say more when a tall, thin man in a green jacket that reminded me of the pictures I’d seen of American military sauntered and casually set one hand on the edge of the table. He had a scraggily beard I was pretty sure had never been combed and long greasy black hair. He sort of reminded me of the homeless people that used to live around the Dioscuri city before the war.

  “Jean Luc, why are you here? The master said you weren’t allowed within the city anymore,” the man in green growled, his teeth flashing in the low light of the rest
aurant as I stared at him, trying to figure out what it was about him that was off. That’s when I realized what it was. He was a vampire. He wasn’t very old, not old enough to have lost his human quirks and gestures like the really old ones had.

  I sniffed, and the creature glanced at me before turning back to Luc who had a weird smile on his face. The vampire smelled of death, but not enough for me to think he was even a year old. Usually vampires didn’t come out in the open like this, so what was a young vampire doing here? Was he just too new to know any better? And why did he dislike Luc so much? He seemed nice enough…

  “Ralph, I’d like you to meet my friend—” Luc was cut off when the vampire slammed his hand down on the table hard enough to crack the cheap wood. The coffee pot bounced, and my water glass fell over and spilled its contents into my lap. It was cold enough, it almost stifled the rage boiling up inside me.

  “Leave,” Ralph the vampire said as he turned and pointed one slender pale finger toward the door. “And take your friend.”

  “I’m still eating,” I replied, my voice low and annoyed as cold water soaked into my crotch, making the urge to kill him rise to totally on my sliding scale of death. “I’ve barely eaten a third of my food and there is no way I am leaving it behind. I’ve never eaten anything like it before—”

  “I. Don’t. Care,” the vampire snapped, glancing at me and narrowing his eyes. They had a scarlet sheen around the edges. So he’d just fed. Swell. Vampires were always so much more difficult to deal with when they had a belly full of fresh blood.

  I sighed. This was exactly the kind of thing I’d wanted to avoid. Somehow, I’d run away from my life as a monster hunter only to wind up trapped in a diner with a vampire within a couple hours of being on my own. It was like karma hated me. Then again, it was always like karma hated me.

  “If you keep being a jerk, you’ll ruin my breakfast, and I’ll be forced to kill you,” I said softly and took another bite of my eggs. “As it stands now, it will already be very hard for you to stay alive.” I chewed slowly as I watched his muscles tense beneath his skin.