The Alpha Bet

by Stephanie Hale

  “Oh.” I do remember the bra being black. Jentry makes a chortling sound and I’m pretty sure she just accidentially snorted some rice.

  “If you really want to have this discussion, I went back and got you two training bras the next day. Of course, you had already taken it upon yourself to make your own.”

  Dad fidgets uncomfortably in his seat. Sean is laughing so hard that I’m just waiting for a snow pea pod to come out his nose. He is such a brat. He has always gotten to say or do whatever he wants. I’ll show him.

  “Mom, did you know Sean looks at porn on the family computer?”

  “Grace!” My family shouts in unison. Jentry spits the water she had in her mouth into her napkin and tries hard not to bust out laughing. Dad takes a long swig of sake.

  “You are in so much trouble when we get home, young man,” Mom says, pushing her chair back and disappearing toward the bathroom.

  “Thanks a lot, Graceless,” Sean yells, stomping off in the opposite direction as Mom.

  My stomach cramps up with guilt for busting Sean out. He didn’t know that I was trying to keep my age a secret. I guess the bra thing is kind of funny. I’m just so confused. I love my new life but a part of me realizes now how much I’ve missed my family.

  “Hey, sisters,” a cheery voice says, cutting through my pity party. I look up to see Kai, a fellow Alpha, standing at our table. My stomach officially plummets to my ankles.

  “Hey, Kai. Your hair looks adorable,” Jentry says in an attempt to distract Kai, who is glancing over at my father.

  “Thanks. I don’t know why I even bothered since we are all just going to be hanging out in our pajamas later,” she says, tossing her silky ebony locks over her shoulder.

  “Yeah. Good times,” Jentry says.

  “These two are so rude,” Kai says, holding her hand out to my father. “I’m Kai.”

  When she doesn’t add, ‘their sorority sister’ to the end of her introduction my heart leaps. Dad will just think Kai called us ‘sisters’ as an endearing term. He won’t think anything of it.

  “I’m Grace Kelly’s father,” Dad says, shaking Kai’s hand.

  “Nice to meet you, Mr. Cook. I’m sure we’ll see you around the house soon.” She laughs. “I better get,” Kai says. Dad looks confused but Kai rushes off before he can ask her what she means. Mom and Sean pass Kai without realizing she was talking to us. The sudden dip in my oxygen level is in extreme danger of making me pass out in my bowl of stir-fry. I do not have the temperament to live on the edge like this. Sometimes I just want to crawl back into my books and never come out.

  “Your father and I will discuss your punishment at home. Let’s not ruin our dinner,” Mom says, hushing Sean who is pleading for his computer time not to be completely revoked.

  I’m trying to figure out how I can backtrack to get Sean out of trouble when I hear Kai’s voice again.

  “Sorry to interrupt everybody, but Grace Kelly, I just wanted to remind you to wear your pledge pin to the Alpha house tonight. I saw that you didn’t have it on and I didn’t want you to get in trouble.”

  ****

  We are back in my dorm room after our disastrous dinner. I am sitting in my plastic desk chair with my knees pulled up to my chest. Mom is pacing our floor while hanging up clothes I discarded earlier when I got dressed. Jentry is curled on her bed in the fetal position. Mom finally runs out of clothes and squats down next to my chair.

  “I want you to know that I’m really proud of you,” she says, brushing some stray strands of hair behind my ears. “But I can’t help but be worried about how fast you’re moving. You’ve never been very big on change and, now, in one week, you’ve changed your appearance, moved away from home, and joined a sorority. And classes haven’t even started yet. How are you going to handle all this?”

  This is just like her to treat me like a baby. I’m practically a grown woman, well kind of, except without a drivers license. So what if I can’t vote, or buy lotto tickets, or drink legally. I’m still a grown up. Sort of.

  “I think I’m holding up pretty well,” I smart off.

  “Where is all of this attitude coming from?” She asks, looking sad.

  Is she serious? Does she really not take responsibility for me being so ill prepared to interact with my peers?

  “Why didn’t you ever try to help me look better or feel better about myself?” I demand.

  The stunned look on Mom’s face sends a dart of pain shooting through my chest.

  “Grace Kelly, you never wanted anything to do with clothes or makeup. Your books were the only things that ever mattered to you. I didn’t know how to compete with that,” she defends herself. “The time I took you to get contacts, you got hysterical and kept screaming the parts of the eye until we got escorted out of the store. After that I just quit trying. You’ve always been smarter than me so I figured you knew what was best.” She stands back up and moves across the room.

  I want to scream at her and tell her to quit making excuses. Then a memory floats up of an elderly security guard rushing us somewhere and I can hear myself screaming, ‘iris, cornea, retina’.

  “You took me for contacts?” I ask amazed.

  “I tried. I even tried to get you to cut your hair but you didn’t want anything to do with it. You didn’t want anything to do with me either. You still don’t.

  “That’s not true, Mom,” I say weakly. Because as much as I don’t want to admit it. She’s right. I always took her attempts to take me shopping or just spend time with me as her way of trying to sabotage my learning. My grades never seemed important to her. I would hand her a report card filled with straight A’s and barely get a response, then Sean would get a C and she would practically scream with joy.

  “I’ve never really known how to talk to you,” Mom admits. “But I’ve always trusted you. So if you really think you can handle all of this,” she says, gesturing around the dorm room. “Then I’ll take your word for it.”

  I nod numbly, hoping I know what I’m doing.

  ****

  I’m still in shock that Mom didn’t throw all my stuff in garbage bags and drag me out of the dorm by my newly highlighted hair. She trusts me. She has never said that to me before and she sure never acted like it. I told Mom that I needed to use the bathroom and that I would meet her at the van to say goodbye. But the truth is that I don’t really want to say goodbye. I miss my family. I miss my room back home. I’m comfortable there. At home I don’t have to worry about my makeup being perfect or that I don’t trip and fall, I can just be myself. It’s not that I’m acting like a different person for the Alphas but with the legacy lie and my age hanging over my head, I always feel on guard. Not to mention watching my back so that Sloane doesn’t trick me again.

  I had to come in and sit on a closed toilet seat to calm myself down. The last thing I want to do after convincing my mom that I’m mature enough to handle college is go down to the car and start bawling when they leave me here. Which doesn’t even make sense because I love it here. I just wish I could have both.

  I take a few calming breaths then make my way out of the dorm and head toward the visitor parking lot.

  “Grace Kelly. Over here,” I hear a voice whisper from behind a tree. I walk toward the voice to see Aimee, a fellow Alpha, hunkered down spying on two girls.

  “Aimee, what are you doing?”

  “That’s my ex-girlfriend and the ho she dumped me for. Look at her. She’s not even cute. Got thunder thighs?” She says bitterly. Okay, I so don’t have time for this. “Oh my God, they’re coming this way,” she says, hopping up.

  “Act natural,” I tell her, although I’m sure she’s pretty much going to be labeled a stalker once her ex sees her hiding behind this tree.

  “Kiss me,” Aimee demands, suddenly in my face.

  “Uh, no offense…”

  “I’ve got K. Kiss me and I’ll run back to the house and rip it down,” she pleads, her ex closing in on us. I debate for a second
then remember the cheerleaders with rage issues I had to deal with earlier. This kiss thing seems like a pretty easy out. I close my eyes, push my lips out and lean in Aimee’s direction. Our lips touch and she wraps her arms around me. Her lips are soft and pillowy but still nowhere as dreamy as Charlie’s. I wonder if it’s weird that my second kiss is from a girl.

  I guess Aimee’s plan must have worked because her ex is yelling at me to get away from her. I open my eyes and instead of being scared that I may have pissed off a rather large girl, I’m more terrified when I see Sean’s eyes peering back at me from the back of my parent’s minivan.

  I walk toward the van, relieved when I realize that my parents were so deep in discussion they had no idea that their daughter was experimenting with the opposite sex just a feet away. Sean is rolling around in the backseat holding his sides from laughing so hard. He’s such a little troll and now he has so much power over me.

  “Hi,” I say when Mom rolls down her window. I can tell she’s been crying but she’s trying really hard to cover it up.

  “I’m sorry that we surprised you tonight. We won’t do it again,” Mom says.

  I have never had a stronger urge to grab her and never let go. I know it is going to be a long time before I see her again because I’m just not strong enough to go home for a visit yet.

  “We love you, Grace Kelly,” Dad adds, blowing me a kiss.

  “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, GK,” Sean says, adopting Jentry’s nickname for me, while wrapping his arms around himself acting like he is making out with someone.

  “Mom, I’m not going to do anything to let you down,” I say, and then remember the beer bong, the run-in with campus security, the panty slicing, making out with Charlie, and then Aimee. Okay, so maybe I stretched the truth a little bit.

  “She’s going to make the right decisions, Marge,” Dad defends me, raising his eyebrows at me in warning. Got it. If I get caught lying to them again, it won’t be pretty.

  “Give me a big hug, sis,” Sean laughs, leaning out his back window. “I want naked pictures of Jentry emailed to me, ASAP, or I’ll blow the lid off your lesbian lover,” he whispers, holding up his cell phone. Great. He’s got photographic proof. I’m so dead.

  “Don’t let yourself get too overwhelmed,” Mom says, grabbing my hand.

  Too late, I think, as I paste a fake smile on and watch my family drive away without me.

  Chapter Nine

  “Why the long face, Little Miss-I-Graduated-High-School-Early?” Jentry asks, reminding me that I haven’t exactly had a chance to explain why I lied to her about my age. After my parents left I went back to my dorm room and got Jentry so that we could walk to the Alpha house together.

  “Listen, Jentry. I’m really sorry about lying to you,” I say, suddenly paranoid that maybe Jentry will be mad and rat me out to the Alphas.

  “You didn’t lie. You just didn’t volunteer the information. I’m kind of proud of you in a sick way.” She laughs.

  “You aren’t mad?” I ask, relieved.

  “You were just looking out for yourself. I get it.”

  “What if the Alphas find out?”

  “Why would they care?” She asks, confused.

  “I don’t know. I just don’t want them thinking I’m too young.”

  “Well, then we just won’t tell them,” she says smiling.

  My stomach stops churning just knowing that, once again, Jentry is looking out for me. I guess maybe my whole family didn’t drive away after all. I am so looking forward to a relaxing night at the house, I think, as Jentry opens the front door of the Alpha house. We dump our bags in the foyer and join the sisters in the great room. They are all sprawled over furniture and the floor chatting.

  “Sit by me, Grace Kelly,” a voice says. I can’t tell who said it because all of the sisters are packed into the great room wearing pajamas and fuzzy slippers chatting excitedly. I practically have goose bumps I’m so excited about my first overnight in the Alpha house. Being in the house with all the sisters is really helping me take my mind off of missing my family.

  “No, GK. Sit by me,” Aimee says. I know I’m not imagining the googly eyes Aimee is directing my way when Jentry elbows me.

  “Somebody’s got a girl crush,” she whispers. Yikes. I think I must have performed K a little too well.

  “I know you’re all excited but everybody needs to take a seat so we can take care of some business before the sleepover starts,” Lindsay says, walking to the front of the room. Jentry and I cop a squat right where we are. I finger my Alpha pin, which is back where it belongs, pinned to the collar of my pink silky pajama top. The cool metal of the pin is reassuring under my fingers.

  “First off, I want to congratulate Grace Kelly for completing tasks; A, B, C, K, P and Z. Although K was sort of questionable,” Lindsay says, throwing a dirty look toward Aimee. Grace Kelly has done everything the Alphas have asked of her and has completed tasks that have bettered our sorority and our campus.” She beams at me. All the sisters start clapping, including Jentry, who is mouthing ‘What did you do for K?’ I’m so lame that I’m afraid I might actually start crying. Being an Alpha means so much to me that I’m terrified the sisters will find out I’m a fake.

  “Thanks, everybody,” I manage to squeak out.

  “Jentry and Sloane are moving right along, too,” Lindsay says, gesturing to their missing letters.

  It seems as though Sloane has miraculously recovered from the flu. She is looking vixen-like in a turquoise teddy and matching feather boa. I have no idea what would possess her to dress like that for a bunch of girls. She is weird/evil squared.

  “Pledges, we have a certain number of volunteer hours that we have to maintain each month to be in good standing with National,” Lindsay explains. “We need to decide where we are going to use our volunteer hours this month. Any suggestions?” Lindsay asks, poising her pen above her notebook.

  “How about the soup kitchen?” Someone volunteers.

  “I’m not going back there. Some bum grabbed my butt last time,” Juliet says, looking infuriated. We all start laughing.

  “Okay, so the soup kitchen is out,” Lindsay agrees. “How about Meals on Wheels?”

  “No, way. I had a lady throw scalding hot meatloaf at me because she thought I was trying to poison her,” Jodi yells.

  “Okay, then,” Lindsay says, crossing something off her paper. “Is there any charity work we’ve done where someone hasn’t been sexually harassed or assaulted by meat?”

  Silence fills the room. I timidly raise my hand.

  “This isn’t kindergarten, Grace Kelly. Just say what’s on your mind,” Lindsay jokes.

  “What about the animal shelter?” I ask, thinking it would be a blast to take care of animals. The sisters start chatting excitedly amongst themselves.

  “That’s a great idea, Grace Kelly. All in favor?” Lindsay asks. Every girl in the room shouts, ‘Aye’.

  Lindsay reaches up to the letters behind her. She yanks down the V and crumples it in her palm. “V for volunteer,” she says, smiling. Sweet! Another letter done. Lindsay is the coolest sister ever.

  “Hey, V was my letter,” another sister starts to complain. Before Lindsay can respond a loud crashing noise comes from the foyer. All the sisters scramble to their feet and head toward the sounds that are booming from the foyer. Jentry and I are nearly there when we hear a guy’s voice yell out, ‘panty raid’. All the sisters start screaming and chasing after frat guys wearing ski masks and all black.

  “This is like a bad eighties movie,” Jentry laughs.

  “What’s going on?” I ask nervously.

  “They are here for our panties. It’s a really lame fraternity tradition,” Jentry explains.

  “What? No.” I shake my head furiously, mortified at the thought of giving my underwear to a total stranger.

  One of the panty raiders comes up behind her and scoops her up in his arms. It would be impossible not to recognize Ron’s
huge muscles even underneath his disguise. Jentry pulls up the bottom part of his mask to expose his lips then kisses him. I go back into the great room to give them some privacy and to escape the madness of all the sisters screaming that they aren’t giving up their best Victoria Secrets panties just for a stupid gag.

  “Give em up, Grace Kelly,” a familiar voice whispers in my ear. My knees practically go weak hearing Charlie’s voice. His chest is pressed against my back with his hands holding my arms to my sides.

  “I don’t live here. All my panties are at the dorm,” I say, happy to have a legitimate excuse. Nothing would embarrass me more than having to hand over a pair of my new not-so-granny panties to Charlie except maybe handing over a pair of my old granny panties.

  “Not all of them,” he says, moving his hands dangerously close to my butt. I thought I was faint tonight with all the parent drama but that was nothing compared to what Charlie’s touch does to me. The commotion in the foyer seems to have died down and it feels like we are all alone in the house.

  “You’ve got to be kidding,” I say weakly, knowing I would give him just about anything he wanted right now.

  “I never kid when it comes to undergarments,” he says. He releases one of my arms then uses his free hand to pull my hair off my neck while he starts kissing it. I lose myself in the feel of his hot breath and lips on my skin. Yelling and slamming doors yank me back to reality.

  “Turn around,” I demand. All I can see of his face are a giant grin and two smiling eyes peering back at me when he turns around. I yank my silky pajama bottoms and my underwear down quickly. My ankle gets caught on my underwear as I try to grab them and I crash into the wall. Charlie snickers lightly. So much for being sexy. I ball up my underwear in my hand then pull my pajama bottoms back on. I cannot believe that I am about to hand over my underwear to a guy I barely know. Ignoring the whole humiliation factor, this can’t be sanitary.

  I stuff them into his pocket and shove him toward the foyer before I chicken out. He whistles happily on his way out without ever looking back.