As Good as the First Time

by K. M. Jackson

Drea held up her hands. “Not with these nails. Sorry. I’d be useless.”

  Pearl held up a rib and shook her head. “Sorry, with this belly my balance would be too off. You’re on your own.”

  Rena turned back to Liv and gave her feigned sad eyes. “Come on, Livy, for old times’ sake. I promise I won’t be mad if we lose, though I know we’re gonna win!”

  Liv hung her head in defeat, and Rena clapped her hands. She turned toward Drea. “Don’t worry, I still have a job for you. You work the perimeter with the beauty queen over here. Just keep the competition off balance. I got both the lights and the gas due. Heck, ‘past due’ is practically my middle name right now. We’ve got to make this work.”

  “I swear, Rena, you will never change. Can’t you show just a little bit of class for once in your life? I don’t know why you deal with that no-good man in the first place. And now here you go hatching up a scheme to swindle folks out of their hard-earned money. Why, it’s enough to bring shame to the family name,” Pearl said as she daintily scraped up the last of her collard greens and put them in her mouth.

  “Well, if it offends you so much it’s a good thing you’re married and don’t have to use the family name, Miss Hyphenation-dash-Trophy-Wife.”

  Liv and Drea looked at each other wide-eyed. Lord, these two cousins were just as bad as the two of them, if not worse. Their argument took on the same biting edge as Aunt Kath and Aunt Joyce. Liv thought briefly about intervening when Rena spoke before she got her mouth open. “How about this? If my actions offend you so much, just leave your cash on the table for your dinner and head home. You don’t have to stay and watch. I know I drove you out here, but I’m sure you can call that husband of yours. He should be over right quick. That is, unless he’s busy tonight, working late or something?”

  At that Pearl seemed to stiffen, then she cleared her throat and waved a hand. Astonishingly she chuckled at Rena’s comments. “Stop being such a pill. I’ll stay. You know Terrence is happy for me to get out and have a little fun every once in a while. It’s not like he keeps a tight leash on me.”

  “Or you on him,” Rena mumbled.

  But Pearl ignored her. “Besides, someone has to be here to make sure you don’t get in any big trouble. Lord knows I don’t want our dear cousins from up north to get the wrong impression about us.”

  Rena’s lips twisted while she gave a slow and steady side-eye to Pearl. “Uh-hmm,” she said by way of an answer. She then took a long pull of her drink and went to get up. She turned to them all as she wiped her mouth and stood, shimmying her hips a little and adjusting her top to show off her curves to their best advantage. She gave Liv and Drea a big smile before looking over toward Clayton’s group and then back at them. “Come on, girls, it’s time for the real fun of the night to begin. Let’s go crack some balls.”

  Along the way she couldn’t help but steer past Caleb Morris. Liv’s instinct was to just give him a quick wave and keep on moving, but for some reason it didn’t feel like enough. Not for an old neighbor and not for someone who inadvertently had such an impact on her life. Letting out a breath she veered off from her group and headed toward the bar.

  “Hey there, Caleb. It’s great to see you. You’re looking fantastic,” Liv said, her possibly too bright, bordering on cracking, smile in place as Caleb leaned over the bar and gave her a surprisingly warm hug.

  She was surprised because though he was Clayton’s older brother by a little over three years, back in the day Caleb was the true star of the family and a little untouchable to her. There was nothing sadder, if you let the townsfolk tell it, than the rise and then sad military fall of poor Caleb Morris.

  Liv remembered how much Clayton always looked up to his all-star older brother and wanted to follow in his footsteps. She also knew how tough it was for him constantly feeling as if he fell just a little short. Not making varsity, not getting the top grades. But everyone was shocked when Caleb ended up taking an ROTC scholarship in order to pay for college when his sports scholarship fell through. And then when he enlisted after that, well it almost pained her to think of how drastically the tables ended up turning for the two brothers. The last she’d heard of Caleb, he’d just started his army tour and was only in a combat zone less than two months before he was back in a military hospital, down a limb.

  Liv pulled back from his embrace, not wanting to, but how could she not notice the marked difference between the feel of his left and right sides despite how well he seemed to maneuver his prosthetic arm. She purposely didn’t look down at the prosthesis, though she marveled at the amazing dexterity he showed handling bottles and serving drinks without any hindrance.

  He rubbed at his bushy beard. “Naw. I know you’re being kind, and I’ll take it. You, on the other hand, are looking great,” Caleb said. His smile was easy and relaxed, though Liv could see there was more than a little bit of weather behind his expressive brown eyes. “I’m glad to see life has treated you so well all these years.”

  Liv fought against the surprising knot of pain his lighthearted comment brought her. As if by rote, Liv smiled brighter. “Yeah, thanks. I guess you could say that.” She paused. That probably wasn’t the best response, but it was all her stupid mind could string together, and she immediately felt like an idiot. “Well, I’d better head on over to the pool tables. My cousin is waiting. This promises to be interesting.”

  Caleb chuckled at that. “Things usually are when it comes to Rena. Here, hold on a second.” He pulled a pitcher of beer from the draft and gave it to her, along with four plastic cups. “Take these over for me. Consider it a welcome gift. Just watch out for your cousin, there. Make sure she doesn’t hurt them too bad. That woman is pretty mean with a stick.”

  Something in his tone gave Liv pause. Doing that automatic thing that some girls do, she couldn’t help but look at Caleb’s hands. No ring, though it was his lower left arm that was left back on the battleground, so Caleb could be married and just not wear a ring on his left finger. Thinking that somehow made Liv feel guilty. Why should she be all up in Caleb’s personal business, worried about whether he wore a wedding ring on his prosthetic hand? Also, why should she be mentally pairing him with Rena when Rena already had one baby daddy too many and enough drama to fill a daytime television show? Liv gave herself a mental head slap as she took the pitcher of beer and nodded at Caleb. “I’ll be sure to try. Thanks.”

  She made her way over to where Rena had already staked her claim at one of the tables and was getting the balls racked while Drea and Pearl were doing their thing staking out the corners. The balls were racked, and it seemed for the moment they weren’t going to get any additional action when a voice from the past hit Liv’s ears from over her left shoulder and stopped her cold. “Care to make this game more interesting, ladies?”

  Liv felt her grip tighten around her cue as she whipped around, not quite judging how near he was and nearly hitting him with her pool cue, coming close to taking off the tip of his nose. But thankfully, or not, he quickly leaned back and ducked out of the way.

  “Whoa, there! I’m just coming by for a friendly game. I didn’t know you were brandishing that thing as a weapon,” Clayton yelped, with more than a bit of uneasy skepticism in his eyes.

  Liv eyed him right back for one beat, then another, and though seconds went by without saying a word, she hoped her eyes told him where he could take his friendly game. But then the sounds of the bar, the laughter, the music, and the general merriment caught up with her, and her eyes shifted as she noticed the gazes of the people around them suddenly trained their way. There was Rena looking as if she were just about to burst, and Liv could tell her overzealous imagination was going into hyperdrive with possibilities. There were also some of Clayton’s crew gawking. The folks she’d noticed at his table were now standing around, and she could tell they were clearly curious about the out-of-towner who was currently taking up their chief’s attention. Most notably the tall beauty who was seated next to him at their tab
le. Though she was currently chatting happily with a couple of the other guys, still her eyes kept shifting toward the two of them. Liv couldn’t quite make out whether she was more than just a friend. She immediately told herself that it didn’t matter. It was none of her business.

  Liv coughed, regaining her composure. “Sorry about that, but you were a little too close,” she said to Clayton in what she hoped was a light voice. She was sure it didn’t quite come off that way, but hey, A for effort.

  Clayton held up his hand and took a half step back. “You don’t have to tell me twice, Miss Gale. I get what you’re saying. But I do come in peace, as a friend and neighbor to welcome you properly back to town.”

  Liv felt her eyes narrow. “Better late than never, huh?” Just as the words escaped her lips she wanted so desperately to pull them back.

  Darn it! What happened to cool?

  She watched Clayton’s expression change. His dark eyes went from soft and brown to so deep and dark they were almost black, and his brows drew straighter as his jaw clenched. She didn’t mean to do it. Well, she did, but on her life she didn’t want to show him how much he’d gotten to her. Not then, not like that. Liv laughed. Big drawn out and way too exaggerated. “Come on, lighten up. It’s been a long time. You want to play or not?” She turned away from Clayton’s too intense eyes and looked over at Rena. “Are we doing this or what?”

  Liv could see Rena mentally calculating. She hoped it was on a potential game bet and not on anything to do with her and Clayton. Her gut told her it was the latter, and she shot her cousin a “shut it down” glare.

  “I’m game,” Rena said in response, going in her pocket to pull out some crisp bills. She looked past Liv and gave Clayton a challenging look. “It’s all on you, Chief.”

  Liv steeled herself, then turned back his way, meeting his eyes once more. “Yep,” she said brightly. “It’s on you.”

  “Come on, Chief, don’t be a stick-in-the-mud. Like a lady said, the night is still young, and don’t we all have to get up early for work? Let’s play,” the young woman who’d been sitting next to Clayton earlier chimed in as she moved away from the guy she was talking to and went to grab a cue of her own. Just great. She’d be playing too? “You know we’ve got your back. Sugar Lake’s finest can’t be beat.”

  Rena turned to the young woman and gave her a smile and a hip check. “That’s why I like you, Avery Duke. You’re a fighter. I can respect that. Now, that doesn’t mean you’re going to win, but I still can respect that. Put your twenty down and let’s cut the chatter and get to playing.”

  Liv and Clayton looked at each other for a moment longer, then he grinned. His lips spreading, his eyes softening, and for just that moment a calm settled over Liv. It felt as if she were seeing him for the first time, but also being hit with a bout of déjà vu. She was bobbing lazily on that beat-up old canoe on the lake. Supposedly fishing, but not catching anything but heat. She was on one end of the boat and Clayton was on the other. Just floating to wherever the current would take them. It was so perfect how they used to be able to just sit together in peace and quiet and not feel the need to fill the air. The sun was at his back, and she could barely make out anything but his silhouette. That was, until the boat shifted and he came into full view again; he looked at her and smiled.

  Clayton shrugged his shoulder, bringing Liv out of the past and into the present as if he were saying, “Hey, better to know when we’re beat.” He turned to the woman she now knew to be Avery. “Okay. I’m in. But remember you are the one who asked for this.”

  * * *

  Clayton tried his best to hold on to any semblance of cool as he picked out a pool cue. Not an easy task when walking suddenly seemed difficult. What was he thinking coming up to her with that line about a friendly game between friends? Who did he think they were? One, they were long past friendly, and two, nothing when it came to Olivia Gale was just a game. It never had been. Not for him, and not when it came to her. But here he found himself, across a pool table getting his behind royally clocked by both Livia and her cousin because he was totally and completely preoccupied by the nearness, the presence, the very idea of breathing the same air as Livia again. The whole thing infuriated him to no end and, from the look of Avery and the rest of his crew, was entertaining as all get-out for everyone else.

  Focus, man, Clayton told himself. There is no way you can go out like this. At least have some dignity. He looked over just as Livia leaned to take a shot. She met his gaze, and he felt sweat break out on the back of his neck. Clayton reached for his beer as Liv shot him a look that was so cool and smooth it told him that, yes, she had indeed changed from the sweet, innocent girl he’d known all those years ago. It was as if she were reaching into his chest and physically crushing his heart with her fist. Well, maybe not his heart. He couldn’t be that dramatic in the pool area of Jolie’s, but he could admit to a stunning blow to his ego. How did she manage it? Acting so cool, as if he didn’t affect her at all. The woman was knocking balls off the table with a vengeance.

  Clayton stilled, then stared deeper.

  Something in this woman was different. He swallowed, needing an immediate cooldown. Something, or someone, had hardened her in away he couldn’t say wasn’t altogether an improvement on the naïveté she used to have. That sort of innocence could end up getting a person played one time too many. But he still couldn’t help missing that sweet sparkle in her eyes. And he could admit to himself that he didn’t like being the one on the receiving end of her calculating gaze.

  For a moment, he imagined all the men in New York who may have gotten that exact same look, and anger threatened to bubble over. It steeled his spine. And for that, Clayton gave Livia a wink just as she was going forward with her shot. She went wide, veering left, and ended up sinking the eight ball, conceding the game to them.

  “That was no fair, you distracted me!” Livia said from over the table while giving him a look that could kill.

  “What are you talking about? I did no such thing,” Clayton said, trying his best to put on an innocent voice. For an answer, Livia just let out a low breath and a groan of frustration, which brought her full lips close together, giving them a certain pouty look that only tortured him more and at the same time made him practically itch with wanting to charge over the table and kiss her until every ounce of frustration had melted from her lips. If this was what losing looked like on her, he’d pay to see what winning was.

  The spell was broken though when she turned to Rena. “Sorry. It was my fault. I’ll pay you back.”

  “No worries, cuz,” Rena said. “It’s just money. And if you really want a chance to pay me back, the night is still young. Follow me over to the bull.”

  Clayton watched Liv’s pretty lips go wide in shock, and Avery laughed. “It’s not like you guys are really losers anyway. You already beat us the first two games. And I for one would love to see some of you city slickers on the bull. That is, if you can handle it.”

  Clayton glared at Avery. Enough was enough. What was she playing at? “Listen, it’s getting late,” he said by way of warning.

  But she shook her head. “We’re not on the clock yet, Chief.” She linked arms with both Livia and Rena. “Come on, let’s head over before the boss takes all the fun out of the night.”

  Livia looked back at him and gave him a challenging glare. “As if we’d let him.”

  Clayton couldn’t ignore the immediate rush of excitement he got or the heat that flowed through him over Livia’s challenge. His eyes followed her while she made her way with the rest toward the bull pit, and he frowned. Did he always used to have this sort of reaction when she walked away when he was eighteen and she was in beat-up sneakers and cutoffs? He was sure he didn’t. It had to be something about the years apart and those darned heels. He scratched at his head and gave it a shake before looking back up and meeting the eyes of his brother.

  Wonderful. Caleb was eyeing him just as he was eyeing Livia, and now the
heat he felt was akin to embarrassment, because Caleb was looking way too smug for his own good. Clayton suddenly wanted to punch something. If anyone should look embarrassed it should be Caleb. Their mother was up in arms worried sick over not seeing him in over a month.

  Clayton shored himself as he picked up his beer and headed over to the bar. He took a seat at one of the only open barstools and waited for Caleb to finish a pour for a customer. Sure, the curt nod may have seemed a little cold for two brothers as close as they once were, but their current state could at best be categorized as complicated.

  Since Clayton had returned to Sugar Lake after things fell apart with Hope’s mother, he’d hoped that at least the upside would be that he and Caleb could grow closer and that his return would help bring Caleb back to his normal self after his injury. But no. He was disappointed to see that instead of further coming out of the fort Caleb had been building, with Clayton’s arrival Caleb only made his walls stronger, fortified them, and built them higher, blocking out not only Clayton, but their mother too. He made himself scarce at family gatherings, church, and any other social activity; he was pretty much the town recluse, all except tending bar at Jolie’s.

  When Clayton and Hope came to town, Caleb moved out of the family house and got himself a trailer on the west side of the lake, where communication was conveniently spotty, or so he’d said, and for the most part lived off the land. Though his skills as an engineer and weapons specialist went far beyond what it took to be a bartender at Jolie’s, here he was. Working here most nights, sporting a beard that would do Grizzly Adams proud. Out of the two things combined, Clayton didn’t know which drove their mother madder.

  “Hey, lil bro. I can’t say I’m surprised to see you here. According to the calendar and my cell blowing up, it would seem about the time Ma would send you around checking up on me.” Caleb took Clayton’s half-empty beer and topped it off, then handed it back to him. “Though I don’t suppose it’s a coincidence you’re here on the same night that Olivia Gale walks in from the great beyond.” He snorted. “Never pegged you to be such a skirt chaser, but then again, she was the skirt that got away, or was it the one you ran away from?”