Golf In A Parallel Universe

by Jimmy Bloodworth

  Copyright © 2016 by Jimmy Bloodworth

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  Prologue

  We have all played that game in our head when we were playing sports as kids.

  Hit that home run to win the World Series.

  Sink that basket to win the NBA Championship.

  Catch that pass to win the Super Bowl.

  And today on the golf course we still play that game. Sink that putt to win the Masters.

  But what if it really happened?

  There are things in the Universe that we do not understand.

  There is a theory that there is a carbon copy of ourselves in a Parallel Universe.

  Join the adventures of a weekend golfer who finds himself cast into a Parallel Universe and into the body and the soul of a Professional Golfer.

  As a golfer, you may hope this will happen to you some day.

  Be careful what you wish for.

  Chapters

  Chapter 1: A Day Of Golf

  Chapter 2: A New Life

  Chapter 3: The Journey Begins

  Chapter 4: Back To Golf

  Chapter 5: The Next Tournament

  Chapter 6: Competitive Mode

  Chapter 7: The Players Championship

  Chapter 8: Golf Lessons

  Chapter 9: Final Stages of Golf Lessons

  Chapter 10: Road to the U.S. Open

  Chapter 11: The US Open

  Chapter 12: Recovery

  Chapter 13: Back to competition

  Chapter 14: Across The Pond to Scotland

  Chapter 15: The British Open

  Chapter 16: Tragedy Strikes

  Chapter 17: Things Get Weird

  Chapter 18: The PGA Championship. Going For The Grand Slam

  Chapter 19: The Journey Ends

  Chapter 20: Decision Time

  Chapter 1: A Day Of Golf

  Sunday morning. I Just arrived at the golf course. I am ready for my 9:00 am tee time. I can’t wait to tee it up and play a round of golf with my buddies. Then go home and watch the final round of 2014 PGA Championship on TV.

  I feel good today. I have been working on my game recently and ready to play. But I have mixed feelings because it is so damn expensive. Green Fee $45.00, Cart $15.00 and I need a new glove. Oh well, no one ever said golf was cheap.

  I am excited. I am addicted to Golf, and I know it.

  It is very rare that I play golf during prime time. Usually I play during the cheap twilight hour or if I can get some discount rate somewhere. Over the last few years I have not had chance to play that often. I get out and play every once in awhile. But mostly go to Driving Range and hit a bucket of balls for Five bucks. That's about the extent of my golf. However, this spring I really got the Golf Fever and played a little more than usual and even took some lessons.

  I used to play quite a bit when I was young. I played on the high school golf team. I was told that I had talent. But I never really cared much about it, and I did not put in the time and the effort. Sometimes I could shoot in the mid 70’s, but mostly in the low and mid 80’s. I was young and dumb and did not care. Besides baseball was my main sport, and that took up most of my passion. Now I am 32 years old, 15 pounds overweight and trying to get back to my old form. I just started playing golf again, a couple of years ago. Now since I started playing again, I am addicted to golf and frustrated that I cannot hit the ball like I could when was in high school. I realize that I am now just a middle class Schmuck with a job that I hate, married with Kids and a mortgage that I cannot afford. I love my wife so much. I will walk to the end the earth for her. She knows how much I love to play golf and does not make a big fuss about me getting out and playing golf. And I so much adore my kids, a 10 year boy and a 3-year-old girl. And my wife is pregnant so we will have a third kid pretty soon. So life is busy. But hey, this is my day. The weather is great, just give me four hours and let it rip.

  I hook up with my three buddies. I buy a new glove in the clubhouse and we get our carts and on the way to the first tee. I pass by the assistant Club Pro. His name is Gerald. I have taken some lessons from him recently. He has helped me alot with my swing. Gerald is an old guy and old school golf. He knows the game. And he can still play the game. He is short fat guy, gray hair and a beat red face. But has a great swing still at 78 years old. When I watch him swing, I realize that some people got it and some people don’t. But he is an old burned out golfer. They say he had great hopes to be professional golfer when he was young. But he had trouble with booze and that cut his career short. And today, he still has a problem with booze. He is one of those guys who just talks all the time, never shuts up. I get irritated with him because he just blabs nonsense sometimes. But he is a good teacher and I put up with him. As we pass he shouts out to me “Keep it Parallel Jim, Keep it Parallel." I just smile and say, “I will try.” He is referring to what he has been working with me on my golf swing. I have a tendency on my backswing to flop my wrist and go way past parallel. So he had me shorten my backswing to just short, or right at parallel. With that change and a few other things he has showed me, it has helped my game a lot. So every time he sees me he always smiles and says “Keep it parallel Jim. Keep it parallel."

  Our foursome tees off and we are all having a blast. These are my old buddies and we do not get together to play golf very often. Three of us can break 90 most of the time. But George is terrible. He cannot break 100 so he is quite a pain to play with. He is a doctor and we are always ragging on him. “Hey you are a doctor you should have a great game, don’t you play every Wednesday?," we always ask him. “I wish," he always says. Today before we tee off we were giving him a hard time. "I hope you brought a lot of golf balls today. We are not busting our ass helping you look for your ball out in the rough.," we told him laughing. "Don't worry, I am here for the beer," he said laughing. He usually doesn't even keep score and keeps up the pace of speed with us pretty well. So we always have a great time. Nothing like getting out on the Links and forgetting about everything for a while and having fun.

  After 5 holes, I start to realize, today is different. I am hitting the ball really well. My drives are straight, and good distance. My irons are crisp and my putts are true. I start wondering. “Are those lessons starting to take effect?” I ask myself.

  After 7 holes I am 3 over par and I feel great! But I know golf is a funny game and anything can happen. Anytime I get on a roll, I get a jolt of reality. And that happened on hole number 8 which is a par 4. I hit a great drive. I am starting to think too much and getting nervous. My second shot is a nine iron to the green. I make a terrible swing and pull it to the left. It bounces off the mound of the green and goes left. My third shot is a long chip and there is a sand trap between me and the green that I need to carry. I fat my chip right into the Sand Trap. Somehow I am able to make it out of the trap, then I two putted for a double bogey. “Welcome back reality," I tell myself. I am pissed! I knew this would happen. We get to number nine tee box and my buddy Tim tells me not to worry about it. “You have only missed one shot all day. And that was that approach shot. Have a beer!," he said smiling and handing me a beer. He is right, I am playing well. My three bogeys were just not getting up and down from just off the green. Number nine is a par 5 and I am five over par. If I am able to par this hole, I will shoot a 41 on the front nine. I hit another good drive right down the middle. I hit a 3 wo
od within 50 yards of the green. I am thinking par for sure and maybe a birdie. Now I got a half wedge shot. This shot is my nemesis. I have a tendency with the “S” word here. The “S” word is what all golfers fear. It is a Shank. Which means you hit the ball straight right which is a disaster. Golfers will hardly even say that word out loud because it can get into your head. So I am nervous. I make a good swing and hit it right at the flag. And to my surprise, It went in!! Eagle! Wow!! We all laugh. I shot 3 over 39. Now I start to fantasize. If I shoot 40 on the back nine, I will break 80! I have not done that since I was 18 years old. We go to number 10, I am ecstatic, I cannot wait until the back nine. Tim gives me a beer and say’s relax and you will play well. We notice that the weather is changing. It looks like maybe rain is coming. Little did I realize the next nine holes with be a dramatic change to my life of universal proportions.

  Golf is a funny game, especially for one who takes the game serious like I do. It can be so frustrating or it can be so much fun. If you are hitting the ball well, it is so much fun. There is nothing in the world like hitting a good solid shot. But if you are not playing well it is so frustrating. You just wonder why we cannot hit every shot well. I guess that is the difference between the armature and the Pro. As an amateur golfer, we just want to hit a good shot. We may hit a few but then will hit a lot of bad ones. Whereas the Pro hits almost every shot very well. it just a matter of the placement of the shot so they can be in position to score. That must be a great feeling to hit the ball solid all the time. I wish I was talented enough to be professional golfer.

  As we play the next few holes, I feel weird. Nothing like I have ever felt before. You always hear how athletes describe how they are “In the Zone." I feel confident and I am wondering if that is what is going on here. Maybe I am the zone now. I am hitting the ball really well but not scoring all that well. A par here, a boogie here, but hanging in there. All I need to do is shoot 40 on the back nine. Par is 36 on the back nine just like the front nine. After 6 holes I am four over par on the back nine, on track for a 40. The weather is deteriorating. The guys are also being quite now. They know this is important to me. They somewhat treat me like in a baseball game when a pitcher is on track for a no-hitter. No one wants to talk to him so they he can concentrate. They also don’t want to jinx him. So they ignore him. That's what it feels like here. I am fine with that. I am focused. As we get on the 16th hole tee box the weather is starting to look really bad. We see a big thunderstorm and it looks like it is coming our way. The guys are saying this does not look good and we need to get out of here. Rain is one thing, but lighting is bad. Especially on a golf course. An open area and carrying little lighting rods in your hands. I convince them to let's at least play hole 16 then we can see how things go. “This storm may go around us," I tell them. They reluctantly concede. Sixteen is the hardest hole on the course, it is tight and long. But I am in the zone. I hit a good drive down the left center of the fairway. I am 160 yards from the pin. I pull out my 4 iron hybrid and hit it perfect 10 feet from the hole. I am amazed because I can never hit my long irons. Am I really in the zone? I get to the green and carefully line up my put. I miss my 10 foot putt and I am pissed. But I still have hope. Two holes to go a par 4 and an easy par 5. If I can par those two I will break 80

  The weather is getting a little scary now. Thunder and Lighting everywhere. The guy’s are getting nervous. “Let's take it in now, it not worth it” they tell me. “I am playing these two holes no matter what," I tell them in a defiant tone. I take my bag off the cart and tell them I will see them later. I am walking these last two holes. They tell me I am crazy and they drive to the clubhouse. I don't care. I have a real chance to break 80. Hole number 17 is a par four. I hit a good drive down the left side of the fairway. I start walking to my ball and It feels good to walk. I haven't done that in a long time. I am walking down the fairway and the thunder is really starting to boom and I am starting to worry about the lightning. I hit my second shot 20 feet in front of the green. I am not able to get up and down and I make a boogie. Now I am thinking this is not such a good idea. It looks I am not going to break 80 and I am going to get killed by lightning.

  I walk to the 18th tee and it is getting very windy and the thunder and lighting is incredible. “What am I doing here. Am I crazy?," I ask myself. I have to make a decision now. Do I stop now and run to the clubhouse so I don’t get killed by lightning? Or do I continue? I have to get a birdie here to break 80 "Is it really worth it?," I ask myself.

  Finally I decided to stick it out. “Hell, it has not rained a drop maybe the storm is going around," I tell myself. Hole 18 is a par 5. The wind is at my back and it is really gusting. I just need to hit a high straight drive and I will be in good position to hit my second shot close to the green and maybe get a birdie. I tee it up high and address the ball. I think about what the assistant pro Gerald tells me. “Keep it Parallel Jim, Keep it Parallel," I say to myself. I make a good swing and I hit a good solid shot. It was high and the wind really took it. I have never hit a drive this far in my life. It had to be 270 yards down the middle. Yeah, it was wind aided, but it was a good shot. “Am back in the zone again," I ask myself. I am Pumped! I pick up my bag and walk to my ball. About halfway there, I realize there is now absolutely no wind at all. Very strange. But the thunder and lighting will not let up. But I am so focused on my next shot. I hit a 5 wood perfect but a little right. It is in a good place about a 25 yards short of the green on the right side of the fairway. If I can get up and down from there, then that's a birdie, and I break 80. I get to my ball and I think about what I need to do. I have plenty of green to work with. I just need to clear the front edge of the green and it should hold. I address the ball, take a deep breath and make a smooth stroke. I hit a crisp chip shot the ball stops about 15 feet from the pin. A very makeable putt, but also very missable putt. I feel like I now have a chance. As I am walking to the green, suddenly my mind starts to spin. I think back when I was growing up. How my dad wanted me to work on my golf game, He always told me that I have some talent and that I need to work on my golf game.” But I never took it seriously. I was too busy being a kid, chasing girls, and playing baseball, which was my favorite sport back then. I still love Baseball. It is a big part of my life. I watch baseball all the time and go to games when I can. I am big into Fantasy Baseball. I am on a couple of Fantasy leagues and at the end of the season me an my buddies get together and have a big party and go over out wins and losses. Also we have a couple of college teams around here and I go to the games when I can. But the biggest thrill regarding baseball is going to my 10-year-old baseball games. That is so much fun watching these little guys develop. I am very competitive, but I control myself at his games. There are too many parents that get too involved and make an idiot of themselves at the games yelling at the umpires and the coaches which is crazy. I think it is just so much fun going to these kids games. The coaches do such a great jobs of molding these boys into baseball players and developing them with their baseball skills and preparing them for life.

  Then I think about my recent lessons with Gerald which has transformed my game almost back to my old form. I think about one day after we finished our lessons we sat down and had a couple of beers. I think he already had a few. He was in one of his talking moods where he rambles on. “Why I did you not stick with golf when you were young?," he asked me. He told me I have natural talent and if I would have stayed with it when I was young, I may have turned out to be something special. I told him I really liked baseball when was young. But I was never any good, I was never a good batter. I told him that I wish that I had had stuck with golf, then maybe I would have become a good golfer some day. He said “Baseball and Golf is just like a singer” You either have the natural talent to sing or you don’t. In baseball and golf you either have that natural swing to hit a baseball or a golf ball or you don’t. “Sure you can alway take batting lessons or golf lessons but you will always be mediocre," he said. “Only the ones
with natural talent and then become a student of the game and work hard will be a special player, whether is is baseball, golf, singing or whatever it is in life. “Jim, I can speak from experience, and Believe Me!," he says emotionally. “You blew it. You have a natural golf swing. You had the chance when you were young and now it is too late” he told me. Then he paused. “But maybe not, just maybe not” he said in a strange tone. “You mean, I still have a chance of being a professional golfer?," I said laughing. “Be careful what you wish for, just be careful what you wish for Jim" he said in a drunken stupor. He got up and walked away. Then he stopped and turned around and said “Keep it parallel Jim. Keep It Parallel." I was thinking this is just one crazy drunk dude.

  I approach my putt and took a look. Easy putt, about 15 feet with a break to the left. If I play it just outside the right side of the cup, it should break and drop in the hole. And I will shoot a 79. Then I notice that my hair is standing straight up. This from Static Electricity from the lightning storm. Same thing happened to me and my buddy in high school on the golf course one time. We were stupid and thought it was funny and laughed. Fortunately lighting did not strike that time. I always thought if it ever happens again, I am not sticking around. But here it is happening to me again. “Do I get the hell out of here now? Or do I stick it out?," I asked myself. I decided foolishly to stick it out and finish. I am sizing up a 15 foot putt. If I can make this, I will break 80.

  It is really dark now because of the dark clouds. I take my time. “just give me a few more seconds." I say to myself as I line up the putt and address the ball. I make myself relax, I do not want to get tense. I am ready now. I make a smooth stroke and the ball is on the way to the hole. The thunder and lightning is getting more intense as the ball rolls. It looks good, but then maybe not hard enough. I crouch down with my putter in the air. The ball hangs on the edge of the cup. And drops! I wait for the sound of the sound of the clink of the ball hitting in the bottom of the cup. And then, Boom!! So incredibly loud and Super Bright light. I know what just happened. Or at least I thought I did.