Mr. Darcy's Secret

by Jane Odiwe

  "Lizzy, you know that is not true. It is clear for all to see how much your husband adores and reveres you. Whatever he might have said in the past he has wholly refuted in his actions. His behaviour to us all, to the whole family has been exemplary; you cannot accuse him of prejudice against us now. In any case, Georgiana has been brought up differently, with an expectation of marriage to unite alliance and fortune; you know that. We did not have a similar prospect; indeed, we had few prospects. I am sure you are more upset by this engagement than she appears to be."

  "I sincerely hope you are right, my dearest sister. You always were the voice of sweet reason."

  "I think you must trust Mr Darcy in this case," added Jane, "or else risk the happiness of your own marriage. Pride and prejudice may be faults indeed but are not confined to your husband alone. Perhaps you should give Mr Calladine a chance to prove himself; he may win Georgiana over in the end. He is a gentleman, after all, and Georgiana might find lasting happiness with a man who is not only wealthy but also completely accepted in her circle. If Charlotte Collins has managed it, I'm sure Georgiana can."

  "But her case was entirely different, Jane. There was no prior attachment."

  "No, you are right, Lizzy. I know I could never have considered such a marriage for myself especially after meeting Charles." Jane paused to regard her sister, her head on one side as she searched the beloved countenance she knew so well. "But I think more than Georgiana's predicament upsets you. Perhaps the idea of Lady Catherine's coming here is making you more anxious than you realise."

  "I daresay the thought of Darcy's aunt is at the root of some of my troubles, and not least, I shall be so sorry to say good-bye to you. How can you think of leaving me to a tongue lashing from Lady Catherine de Bourgh?"

  Jane got up from her seat to hug her sister for the last time. "I could not if I had the least worry that you would be incapable of holding your own. I recall your retort as you reported it to me on the occasion of your last interview with that lady: 'I do not pretend to possess equal frankness with your ladyship. You may ask questions which I shall not choose to answer.' Lady Catherine knows when she has met her match, I am certain. I don't doubt you will manage very well!"

  ∗ ∗ ∗

  Elizabeth was more worried about the impending visit from Mr Darcy's aunt than she was prepared to let on, but was determined not to dwell on any misgivings she might have. There was quite enough to deal with simply organizing such details as food and menus, and which bedchamber Lady Catherine was to occupy, without being anxious about any conversation they might share. At least Miss de Bourgh, Lady Catherine's daughter, would not be accompanying her. Apparently, Anne was staying behind with her companion Mrs Jenkinson in the hope that the change of air and spa water would do her some good. Sickly, pale, and cross, the spoiled cousin of Mr Darcy had never enjoyed good health, and Elizabeth knew that no expense would be spared in the efforts to revive the spirits of this despondent creature, though she considered it unlikely that any amount of money or treatments would make a jot of difference. Privately, Elizabeth felt quite sorry for the girl who had never been allowed to live a normal life. In her opinion Anne had not only been spoiled, but had also been fussed over and mollycoddled to the point of suffocation. No wonder the girl was awkward in company and socially inept--she was never allowed to speak and would not dare oppose her mother's beliefs or statements on any topic. Besides all this, Lady Catherine's hopes for an alliance between her daughter and Mr Darcy had been thwarted, and as such, Lizzy was sure that Anne would avoid coming to Pemberley altogether if she possibly could. At least Lady Catherine was not due for another week; Lizzy would have time to prepare fully.

  Elizabeth's own spirits were subdued. The Christmas celebrations and Georgiana's engagement, not to mention the awkwardness that subsisted between Lizzy and Darcy as a result, had all taken its toll. Mrs Darcy was feeling tired and lacking in energy, which was so extraordinary that she felt some concern. Determined to find a solution she decided she was in need of some fresh air and exercise; being cooped up inside because of the bad weather was never good. She formed a plan to walk to Lambton in the afternoon, but made a decision not to inform anyone else. Elizabeth had a feeling that Mr Darcy might not approve of his wife going about the Pemberley estates unaccompanied and without a carriage. He need never know; his time was taken up with estate matters on Wednesdays.

  Donning her sturdiest boots and a beloved cloak from her Longbourn days, which was warm and comfortable if not considered as smart as others in her new wardrobe, she set off. Out of doors, Elizabeth instantly felt better in the fresh air, with a light rain misting her features, the smell of Derbyshire limestone, and the scent of moss sprinkled like green jewels upon stone walls assailing her senses. Following the river on the shortcut to Lambton bridge, she took pleasure in observing the riverbank twisting and curving with the rushing water moving swiftly in between, glinting like steel knives when the afternoon sun decided to make a brief appearance. Ancient trees dipped their gnarled fingers into the rushing torrent as their branches arched over her head dripping raindrops onto her hood. Walking was sublime exercise when the outlook was so beautiful and Lizzy made rapid progress, becoming almost disappointed as the sight of a few scattered cottages and the medieval bridge with its five arches and triangular cutwaters came into view. Crossing the bridge she paused to watch the waterbirds for a moment. There were few people about and of those who walked none seemed to take much notice of her for which she was grateful. She knew if she had arrived in a carriage or dressed in her best pelisse it might have been a different matter. It was lovely to be anonymous for a change and the sense of freedom that she felt such as she had enjoyed in the old days almost overwhelmed her. Chiding herself for being silly and sentimental, she continued over the bridge and turned into the lane leading to the High Street. It had been her intention to turn round and walk straight back to Pemberley, but now she was here she was struck by the idea of calling on Mrs Butler. That she could send news to her Aunt Gardiner about her friend seemed a wonderful idea.

  Mrs Butler was surprised but exceedingly welcoming at the sight of her visitor. Lizzy was made to sit next to the fire, where Mrs Butler soon had the kettle on a trivet over the burning logs until it sang, hissing with steam. Her best china was produced and a cup of fragrant tea placed before Elizabeth on the small Pembroke table at the side of the sofa.

  "My dear, you must be perished with the cold coming such a long way on foot," said Mrs Butler.

  "I love to go walking and as the sun did keep peering out from under the rain clouds I thought I would make the best of it. I do not feel the cold and walking always warms me up." Elizabeth sipped her tea. She was very curious to ask after Tom, but she was reluctant to start up any conversation regarding that gentleman. Whether Mrs Butler knew about Georgiana's engagement or not she had little idea. There was a possibility that her aunt had informed Mrs Butler of it and news travelled fast in the countryside, but she could not be sure, nor of how much the lady knew of what had formerly happened between Tom and Georgiana.

  Mrs Butler was the first to speak. "I must offer my congratulations on Miss Darcy's engagement, Mrs Darcy. You must be very pleased."

  "Thank you, Mrs Butler. I shall pass on your good wishes to Miss Georgiana." Elizabeth made no further comment. Even with a desire to make polite conversation she could not profess to be pleased. She picked up her teacup, once more contemplating how she might ask after Mr Butler to find out why he had left so quickly after the ball.

  "Have you any news of young Thomas?" asked Elizabeth tentatively, unable to resist asking for information. "We were disappointed not to see him before he left for London."

  She need not have worried. There was no awkwardness in discussing Tom's activities. Mrs Butler declared that his patron, Lord Featherstone, had use of him again and he would be in Richmond and London for the foreseeable future. Indeed, he was so busy that she was not sure of seeing him for some time. Still, his mo
ther was pleased that he was needed and being introduced to many important people who had expressed great interest in his methods of landscape gardening with a view to having their own gardens improved upon.

  "I am not in the least surprised," said Lizzy. "Tom is a very talented young man. I am so pleased with the designs he did for me. As soon as the weather improves, work will start on the upper slopes. It is a surprise for Mr Darcy and I can't wait for him to see it."

  "Tom will be so pleased to hear you are happy with everything. He left in such a hurry, only arranging at the last minute to send the book over. I did think he would come and present it to you himself at Pemberley, but I'm afraid he insisted that there was not a moment to lose. I do hope you understood, Mrs Darcy. Tom does not mean to be rude, but he has a habit of flying about the country and setting off in a moment."

  "Of course. It is a habit of many young men, I think. Mr Darcy's particular friend Mr Bingley is rather like that in his practices."

  "That reminds me, Mrs Darcy. Please do apologise to your husband for not stopping to speak to him the other day in Birchlow. I had been visiting a friend when I saw him and it was only when he had passed by me on the opposite side that I realised who he was, and by then he had disappeared. I cannot think why I did not recognise him straight away, but you know what it is like on these dark winter afternoons when gentlemen are swathed in greatcoats and hats. I'm sure he didn't see me, in any case, but if you would mention it, all the same. I would not like him to think I was discourteous."

  "I'm sure he would think nothing of the sort, Mrs Butler. When was this, did you say?"

  "Hmm, let me think. It must have been last Friday, market day. Yes, that's it. I remember now, and perhaps the reason for not recognising Mr Darcy straight away was because he was dressed in country fashion, as if he had been to market himself. I didn't recognise the young gentleman he was accompanying, a fine tall boy. They seemed to be in a hurry, so it's just as well he didn't see me; he didn't look as if he had a moment to lose."

  "He didn't mention going to Birchlow, but I'll certainly pass on your felicitations. I know he does attend market occasionally with his steward, especially if there are horses to be bought."

  Elizabeth was puzzled. Fitzwilliam told her most of his activities, but she couldn't remember this outing or that he had mentioned calling on the Tissingtons. Lizzy was certain it must have been George Tissington that Mrs Butler had described. She put down her teacup. All of a sudden she felt very weary. Sitting by the warm fire was making her feel very drowsy. Despite her efforts, her eyelids flickered shut momentarily.

  "Forgive me, Mrs Darcy, I think you are feeling tired. I hope you will not mind my saying this, but you are very pale. Are you feeling quite well?"

  All of a sudden Lizzy felt as if she had become a leaden weight; her limbs felt heavy and aching and the tiredness was so consuming that she felt sleep steal over her like a dose of laudanum. She was feeling rather strange again, and a wave of nausea washed over her so strongly that she thought she might faint.

  "Oh, Mrs Butler, I am so sorry, you must think me so rude coming here unannounced and then falling asleep the moment I sit down. I do not know what the matter is with me, but I admit I have not really been feeling quite myself these past few days. I thought air and exercise would do me good, but I admit I do not feel very strong. What would you advise, Mrs Butler, for the sickness I seem to be suffering of late? I can hardly eat and it is so unlike me to lose my appetite."

  Elizabeth looked up to see Mrs Butler smiling at her. "Oh, my dear, I do not think you should worry unduly about your sickness; it is an excellent sign in cases such as these. Forgive my impertinence, but I think you must take good care of yourself in your situation."

  Elizabeth met Mrs Butler's eyes, which twinkled with merriment.

  "Oh, my dear Mrs Darcy, do forgive me, but with your welfare in mind, your aunt asked me if I would keep an eye on you just before she left. As your aunt and your mother are so far away, I hope I may be of some use to you. That is, of course, if you should wish it."

  With a dawning realisation at her insinuation Lizzy blushed as she caught the sense of Mrs Butler's speech. Could it possibly be true? She looked over at the kind lady beaming on the opposite side and remembered what her aunt had said about Martha, her oldest and most trusted friend. To have someone to confide in, someone who knew exactly how she was feeling would be wonderful, if what Mrs Butler was implying was really a possibility.

  Elizabeth tried to find the words. "Do you mean? Are you suggesting...? Oh, my goodness!" cried Lizzy, in amazement as the reality of her situation started to sink in. "Mrs Butler, I can think of no one else I would rather turn to for advice than your good self. If what you say is true I know your advice will be invaluable, thank you."

  "You must arrange to see a physician as soon as possible. And rest assured, Mrs Darcy, this conversation is private and strictly confidential. Do not worry; I should never repeat anything you have to tell me. Now, whilst the idea of this splendid news is sinking in, I shall leave you for a moment. I have a seed cake in the pantry, which I will fetch just now. A slice and a fresh cup of tea will do you good and help you get your strength back. And when I return we will consider how best to get you home."

  Elizabeth fairly hugged herself with excitement, but until she had more proof or seen the physician, she was not quite sure she could believe it. Besides, it was early days and she knew that she would have to wait a little longer before confiding in anyone else, even Fitzwilliam. To have his hopes raised before everything was certain would be disastrous if it turned out she was mistaken, or worse, if something went wrong. "A baby, perhaps an heir to Pemberley," she thought. "Am I really having Mr Darcy's baby? Is it possible that I am going to be a mother?" The very idea was enough to make her want to burst with pride, and how she would keep her secret she could not contemplate.

  Mrs Butler returned bearing the promised cake, which was cut into slices and elegantly arranged on a colourful Newhall plate. Surprisingly, Elizabeth thought that, considering how nauseous she had felt earlier, she now felt absolutely ravenous and devoured the cake with ease. Mrs Butler urged her to take another piece, adding that it would help her to regain her strength for the journey home. "Not that I shall be allowing you to walk home, Mrs Darcy. If you have no objection you can have a ride in my donkey carriage."

  "I do not want to put you to any trouble, Mrs Butler, but the idea of your donkey carriage is a lovely one. Thank you so much, I do not think I could manage the walk home at present."

  So it was settled. Mrs Butler's manservant Nicholls would drive her home.

  "Well now, Mrs Darcy, if it's not too impertinent of me, I'd like to suggest that we get you home before it gets dark and they send out a search party for you. Remember, if you need me for anything at all, just ask; I am always here. And when you next write to your aunt, if you can include amongst all your exciting news that you have seen me, I would be most grateful. She will understand. Take care of yourself, my dear, and keep your walking to a gentle stroll around the garden for the present."

  "I will, Mrs Butler. Thank you so much for a lovely afternoon and for all your kindly advice."

  The little carriage soon stopped outside the gate, and after Mrs Butler had shown Lizzy in and wrapped her up in blankets and shawls, they set off at a gentle pace. It was rather lovely to be out clopping along at a donkey's pace in an open carriage, the air fresh in her face. As Lizzy contemplated the excitement of all that had passed during the afternoon's conversation, she could not help but dwell on what Mrs Butler had said about seeing Mr Darcy in Birchlow. That he had been seen accompanied by a young man was rather strange; his steward could hardly be considered to be fitting the description, and that he had not mentioned the trip made it all the more puzzling. Birchlow, she knew, was home to the Tissington family. Master Tissington was a fine, tall boy. But what was Mr Darcy doing with the boy? She supposed he must have called on the family; after all, the boy's moth
er had been a servant of the Darcy family. She would ask him about it when she got home. For now, she could think of little but the reasons for her tiredness and of how thrilled she was at the idea. The little cart picked up pace as they turned over the bridge, and Elizabeth delighted in all she saw of Lambton village around her. Lamps were being lit and she could see into the windows of some of the cottages, into cosy kitchens where mothers with babies on their shoulders nursed them to sleep. Elizabeth fell into a delightful reverie imagining how it might be to nurse her own babe, when just as they were approaching the crossroads, another carriage coming along in the opposite direction was travelling with such fearsome speed that it seemed a collision was inevitable. Nicholls pulled on the reins, ensuring that his docile donkey halted, but nothing was going to stop the other carriage, which appeared not even to notice the little donkey cart until it was almost too late. Watching with increasing alarm Elizabeth saw the other carriage swerve within a hair's breadth of her and observed with sickening clarity horses rearing in fright, and the whole coach sway dangerously from side to side. Not only was there complete uproar, but also the lady seated within the oncoming coach poked out her head at that moment and shouted in abusive tones, "Get out of the road, you stupid man! What do you mean by hogging the highway with that stinking cart. Do you not know who I am? I shall have you incarcerated."