by Carrie Daws
Faye patted her hand. “And sometimes through dreams.”
Chapter 20
TWO DAYS LATER, MELODY MET Faye at the logging office, and they drove together to Peter and Amber’s home. Because of the family attraction to log cabins, this time she was expecting the beautiful log home before her.
Brittany opened the front door for them, and Melody looked across an open living and dining room interrupted only by a spiral staircase going up into a loft. Amber was comfortably lying on her side on the couch while an older woman was lighting a cinnamon-vanilla scented jar candle on the coffee table.
“Oh, how pretty,” said Faye.
“Victoria thought we could all use a touch of fall,” said Brittany.
A chocolate brown tablecloth was folded in half to cover the coffee table, and bright orange leaves encircled the tan-colored candle. Plain white plates sat beside crystal goblets.
“Just because we are eating in the living room,” said Victoria, “doesn’t mean we have to give up the things that make the dining room pretty.”
Victoria walked over to Melody and wrapped one arm around her shoulders. “It’s good to see you again. I’m so glad you decided to come.”
Amber and Ryan’s mom hadn’t changed much since Ryan and Brittany’s wedding. Her trim figure and modern clothes still showed her meticulous attitude toward details and caring for herself.
Melody returned her smile. “Thanks.”
“Remind me, have you and Amber known each other long?”
Melody shook her head. “We just met at Brittany’s wedding.”
“Mel and I used to work together at Doernbecher’s Children’s Hospital,” said Brittany.
“That’s right,” said Victoria with a nod of remembrance.
“Who’s in the mood for some chicken?” Faye asked.
“That sounds delicious,” said Amber. “What kind did you make?”
“I brought chicken piccata,” said Faye.
“Oh, yum,” said Brittany as she rubbed her expanding belly. “We’re eating good today, baby.”
Everyone laughed. A timer dinged, and Victoria moved toward the kitchen. “That should be the pasta.”
“Amber, we worked this right!” said Brittany. “You provided the home, I provided the salad, and the moms provided the good food!”
Victoria laughed. “Have you always thought with your stomach, Brittany?”
“Always!” said Faye, joining in the laughter.
The women gathered around the food. “Well, let’s pray and eat,” said Faye. “Father, thank you for the beautiful fall you painted in the trees outside. Help us not to take it for granted. We ask that you continue to heal Melody’s heart and bless the growth of Amber’s and Brittany’s babies. Protect them and use them. Bless this food and help us to become the women you want each of us to be. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Faye took the wrapping off the platter of chicken, while Victoria began filling the glasses with lemonade.
“Thank you, guys, for coming over today,” said Amber.
“Getting tired of Peter’s company?” said Brittany, smirking as she took a bite of chicken.
“No,” said Amber with a twinkle in her eye. “But different company is nice. Plus, I think he was going about as stir crazy as I am.” Amber laid her head down on her pillow.
“His dad is sure missing him being around,” said Faye. “And we miss you horribly in the office. I don’t know what kind of mess we’re making for you, but I even had poor Melody in there Monday trying to put together end-of-quarter stuff for Allie.”
“It wasn’t that bad,” said Melody with a wave of her hand. “Of course, I don’t know what it normally looks like.”
Brittany laughed. “If it was anything like Mom’s normal creative process, I bet the office looked like a tornado went through.”
“Now girls, some of us have different systems.” Victoria winked at Faye as she continued. “I frequently think that the more that is dragged out during the cleaning process, the neater it will be in the end.”
“Yes,” said Brittany, “but how near the end are we?”
“Well,” said Faye. “I suppose we’ll find out when Allie gets back to me tomorrow. And when Amber gets back to work.”
“Are you missing it, Amber?” asked Melody.
“Hmm?” Amber squinted at Melody and tried to prop herself up a little, pausing immediately after she began moving.
“Amber?” said Faye, looking alert.
Brittany got off the floor and went to Amber’s side. “What is it? What are you feeling?”
Eyes closed, Amber lay very still. “My head really hurts. The light is bothering my eyes, and I feel nauseous.”
Brittany looked at Victoria. “Do you know where the blood pressure cuff is?”
Victoria went to the bedroom.
Melody felt Faye’s hand on her arm. She looked at her and gave her best attempt at a smile. God, I don’t know why you took Cole, but I’m asking that you don’t take Amber’s baby.
Victoria handed the cuff to Brittany. The room stilled, waiting for Brittany’s response.
“Mom, call Ryan and Peter. We’ve got to get her to Portland.”
The next several minutes were a flurry of activity as Victoria found Amber’s hospital bag and Brittany prepared Amber for travel. Peter rushed in the door and was promptly sent out to his Jeep with pillows and a blanket to try to make the trip as comfortable as possible for Amber.
By the time Ryan arrived, they were ready to go. Peter carried Amber out, and Ryan helped to maneuver her into the back seat with Peter.
“Roll left as much as you can, sis,” said Ryan.
Doors were shut, and Ryan jumped in the driver’s seat, while Brittany hopped in the front passenger seat. Then they raced away.
As soon as they were off, Victoria grabbed her purse. “I’m going to stop in town and get Thomas, then head to Portland.”
Melody hadn’t met Amber’s father yet but imagined him to be soft-spoken like his wife.
At the door, Victoria paused and looked back at Faye. “Are you going to come up? Or do you want me to call you?”
“Call me,” said Faye. “We’ll come up once she’s resting in her room.”
“Okay,” said Victoria, shutting the door behind her as she hurried off to her car.
Faye looked at Melody. “You okay?”
“A little shaky, but I think it’s because my mind keeps playing through all the possibilities.” Melody shrugged. “I was able to pray for the baby while everyone was getting things ready to go.”
“That’s my girl.” Faye wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “How about we keep praying and get this lunch cleaned up? I figure it will be at least an hour and a half before we hear anything at all. Might as well keep busy.”
Melody returned to her aunt’s house to find Patricia working in the flower garden. “Just tryin’ to get these things cleaned up before the snow flies. That termination dust is getting lower on the mountains. Should have some snow before long.”
Melody looked toward the mountains, remembering how everyone watched the snow line getting lower on the mountains to judge how much longer before summer “terminated” and the snow started falling in the lower elevations.
“Want some help?”
As they worked side-by-side, pulling weeds and trimming back plants, Melody filled Patricia in on the events of the afternoon.
Patricia sat back for a moment in the grass. “Well, I guess we’ll know God’s choice soon.”
“Are you worried?”
“No sense in doin’ that quite yet, child.”
“Do you worry about anything, Aunt Patricia?”
“Oh, sure.”
“What do you do? How do you keep your worries under control?”
Patricia shrugged. “I pray.”
“Pray. It’s that simple?”
“Well, simple, yes. Never confuse simple with easy.”
The words reverberated wit
hin Melody’s head. Never confuse simple with easy.
“Reading your Bible every day is a discipline. It’s simple, but not always easy because life gets busy, or you get sick, or whatever. Prayer is also a discipline, and with practice, it becomes more natural. The more you tell yourself to pray over every little worry, the easier it is to do it before you think about it. It becomes part of your brain’s programmed response, like riding a bike or driving a car.”
The front screen door slammed shut, and David strode into view. “Mel, Faye just called. She said to call her back when you have a moment, but Amber gave birth to a healthy baby boy.”
Chapter 21
MELODY GAVE DAVID A BIG hug just before rushing inside to wash her hands so she could return Faye’s call.
“Hi, Faye.”
“Oh, Melody. I knew you’d want to know. Little Daniel is doing great. Peter said he weighed in at four pounds twelve ounces, which is too small for the regular nursery. So they’ll keep him in the NICU. Also, the hospital wants to hang onto him until thirty-five weeks just to be on the safe side, but right now he looks strong.”
Melody breathed a sigh of relief. “When does he reach thirty-five weeks?”
“Saturday, and Amber should be released on Friday, so that works out just about perfect.”
“Are Peter and Amber going to stay in Portland until the baby is released?”
“Yes. Our oldest son, Logan, and his family live just this side of Portland. They’ll stay there until Daniel can come home.”
“I’m so glad things are going well.”
“Me too, dear,” said Faye.
Melody hung up the phone and felt a prick to her heart. Oh, Cole.
David came up behind her. “You okay?”
She looked up and smiled at him. “The baby’s name is Daniel. He’s little but looks good. They are hoping he’ll get to come home Saturday.”
“Do you want to go see him?”
Melody thought about walking back into a hospital. Her mind argued back and forth. It’s a different hospital, but it’s still a NICU. Daniel is doing well, but the baby next to him might not be.
As she ran through the debate, her eyes focused on her aunt standing just inside the front door. “What do you think, Aunt Patricia?”
“I think I didn’t just bury my own baby less than a month ago.”
“Should I go?” Her eyes pleaded with her aunt.
“Child, if you go, go out of a love for Amber. If you don’t go, know that everyone in that family understands. They aren’t askin’ or expectin’ a single thing from you except that which you can willingly give.”
Melody groaned and sat down on the couch. “I think that makes this harder.”
David sat beside her. “There’s no rush. We don’t have to be back in North Carolina for two more weeks. Let’s take it easy tonight and see what you think tomorrow.”
By lunchtime Thursday, Melody had made up her mind.
“David, I want to go visit Amber,” she had said as they sat around the kitchen table.
Patricia had shooed them out of the house, telling them she was fully capable of cleaning up the dishes. Now, as Melody looked up at the large white building that housed Oregon Health & Science’s children’s hospital, she wasn’t sure this was a good idea.
David parked the car. “Are you ready?”
Melody inhaled deeply. “I’m not sure I can go see the baby.”
“That’s fine.”
“What-if” questions began to torment her mind. “What if I can’t do this?”
“Then we go back to Crossing.”
“But what if I start to cry in Amber’s room?”
“Then I’ll hold you.”
“But what if . . .”
“Mel. Stop.” David reached for her hand. “The only way we’re going to know what will happen is if we get out of this car and walk into the hospital. We don’t have to be here. We can turn and walk away at any moment.”
She gazed deeply into his eyes.
“Okay?” he said.
“Okay.”
They walked into the building hand-in-hand and made their way to Amber’s room. David softly knocked, and Melody opened the door slightly. “Can we come in?”
Peter grinned. “Hey! It’s good to see you guys.”
Melody slipped over to the bed and hugged Amber.
“I’m so glad you came,” said Amber, her eyes tearing.
“I wanted to see you,” said Melody.
“How’s everything going?” said David.
“Good,” said Peter, offering Melody his seat. “Although he’s having . . . what is it called, Ray?”
“Phototherapy,” said Amber. “He was developing some jaundice, so they put him under the light to help.”
“How long does he have to be under that?” Melody asked.
“Should just be a couple of days,” said Amber.
“It will probably postpone his release a day or two,” said Peter.
Melody fidgeted in the chair. “Daniel is a great name.”
“Thanks,” said Amber. “He’s named after his grandfather and father.”
Peter offered more of an explanation. “The tradition in my family—started by our Danish ancestors—is that each baby accepts a name from one of its grandparents. My dad’s name is Franklin Daniel.”
“And I wanted him to have a piece of his daddy,” said Amber.
“But I refused to let her consider my middle name!” said Peter, winking at his wife.
“So, it’s Daniel Peter?” said David.
Peter nodded.
Amber looked at Melody. “I don’t know whether to ask you or not . . .”
Melody’s breath caught in her throat, and she could feel her heart pounding.
“Do you want to go see him?” said Amber.
The concern in Amber’s face was almost overwhelming, and tears began gathering in Melody’s eyes.
“You don’t have to,” said Peter. “If it’s too much . . .”
David knelt beside his wife. She met his gaze as she wiped tears from her cheeks and then glanced at Amber, who was also crying.
“Melody,” said Amber, “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked . . .”
“No, please don’t be sorry,” said Melody. “I just . . . I just don’t know if I’ll be able to handle going into the NICU.”
“Please don’t feel pressured,” said Amber. “I’m just so glad you came.”
“Will you think less of me if I say yes, but then can’t go in?” said Melody.
“Not if you don’t think less of me when you watch me try to get out of this bed,” said Amber, smiling.
Melody smiled back. “Want to know the trick I learned?”
Melody helped Amber out of bed and into her robe while the guys waited in the hallway. As Amber led the way, Melody focused on putting one foot in front of the other. They paused at the NICU doors, and Amber looked at Melody.
“Are you okay?” said Amber.
“So far,” said Melody.
Amber walked through the doors, and Melody took a deep breath. Trailing behind, she tried to keep her eyes focused on Amber, but the babies drew her eyes.
Some lay in plastic isolettes, some in open beds. Some had ventilators, many had IV bags, and all of them had monitors with flashing numbers. She had learned so much in the last year as she recognized the meaning behind some of the numbers on the monitors.
“Hey, folks,” said a nurse. “It’s not quite time to feed your baby again, is it?”
“No,” said Peter. “We had some friends stop in for a visit.”
“Ever been in a NICU before?” said the nurse.
Melody didn’t trust her voice to speak clearly, so she just nodded. David put his arm around her shoulders.
“You okay?” said the nurse.
“We just recently lost our son,” said David. “This is a bit overwhelming.”
“I’m sorry,” said the nurse. “He was in the NICU?”
Melody barely saw David nod through her tears.
“Not here,” he explained. “North Carolina.”
“Well, feel free to sit and enjoy this little one as long as you like.”
The nurse walked away, and Amber grabbed Melody’s hand. “Do you need to leave?”
Melody looked at the precious child lying under the phototherapy lamp before her. Aside from the slight yellow color to his skin, he was tiny and beautiful. Dark hair stuck out at odd angles around his head, and one tiny fist stretched out from his side.
Tears flowed freely. “Oh, Amber. He’s gorgeous.”
Chapter 22
DAVID HADN’T REALIZED HOW MUCH walking into the NICU would bother him. When he’d rushed home to see Cole, his entire focus has been on his son. Now, as he sat on the front porch of Patricia’s home Sunday afternoon, snapshots of what he’d witnessed three days earlier still haunted him.
How did Mel survive all those days in the NICU? Does she still see the wires and hear the monitors?
“Not most of the time.”
The voice startled him, and he jumped from the chair, spinning to see its source. Leaning on the porch railing was a blond, blue-eyed man casually dressed in blue jeans and a long-sleeved shirt.
“Matthew?”
He nodded.
“You can read my thoughts?”
“I just repeat what messages come from the Father.”
A ruby-crowned kinglet lighted on a tree branch near Matthew, while an orange and white tabby cat climbed the porch steps.
“God’s personal messenger,” said David.
“Primary job description.”
“So what’s the message?”
Matthew chuckled. “Nothing like getting to the point, huh?” The tabby cat rubbed against Matthew’s leg, and he crouched down to scratch around its ears.
“Angels like small talk?”
Matthew grinned. “You both are gaining fresh perspectives while in Crossing, but the trip home quickly approaches. Don’t let the pain of walking back into the home you shared with Cole surprise you.”
David squared his jaw. Going home. “Okay.”
Matthew straightened and leaned against the railing. “Also remember your place.”
“My place? What’s that mean?”