Reach for Tomorrow

by Rita Bradshaw

  ‘Wealth!’ Sally’s voice was scathing. ‘A bit farm with a few pigs an’ cows, an’ chickens that don’t know which end to lay an egg by the sound of it.’

  ‘You don’t want to listen to all me brothers say, now then. It’s jealous they are, the lot of ’em. Me grandda’s farm was a nice little place from what I remember of it.’

  ‘Aye, from what you remember of it. An’ how old was you on your last visit?’ his wife asked caustically. ‘Refresh me memory.’

  ‘Old enough.’ And at her raised eyebrows, ‘All right, ten.’

  ‘I rest me case.’

  ‘Aw, come on, Sal. Don’t be takin’ it like that, lass.’

  ‘An’ there’s all the trouble out there, an’ it’s got worse, not better, since the Free State treaty. Tell him, Zachariah.’ Sally flung her arms wide as she appealed to Zachariah. ‘Tell him we’ll wake up to find we’ve been murdered in our beds.’

  ‘An’ you call me Irish!’ And then, as Sally went to say some more, ‘Look, I know you’re worried, lass, but me grandda’s place is in a nice quiet spot in Southern Ireland, added to which there’s plenty of me mam an’ da’s family still livin’ near. We’ll be goin’ to family an’ that makes all the difference. An’ our own place, lass. Think of that.’

  Sally was clearly unconvinced but just as clearly resigned to the inevitable, and as she looked into Mick’s large rough face, his eyes bright with anticipation, she shook her head slowly before saying, ‘Oh well, where thou goest, I goest.’

  It wasn’t what Mick expected and as he stared at her, his mouth slightly agape, she turned to grin at Rosie and Zachariah as she winked and said, ‘See? I can still knock him bandy.’

  Oh she’d miss Sally. Even as she laughed with the others Rosie felt a dart of pain at her forthcoming loss. Things were going to change and they would never be the same again. Her mother and Hannah were spending more and more time at Mr Green’s little house on the outskirts of Hendon, close to Hendon beach. Hannah loved playing on the sands with Mr Green’s next-door neighbour’s children, and although her sister’s timid disposition - so unlike Molly’s - made her frightened of the sea, the stream running through Backhouse Park that went into the culverts, or cundies as they were known locally, in the Valley of Love and then came out on the beach, kept her down on the sands with the other children all day long.

  Then there was Flora and Davey engaged to be married and already they were talking about moving away. Davey had made out the night before that it was due to the rising unemployment in the area caused by the increasing stranglehold on the mining communities and the steelworks by the government, but even she knew it was the same the whole country over. All right, maybe the north was being hit worse than most by the depression, but he and Flora would be comfortable enough with the money her parents had left her and all. But then, wouldn’t it be better in the long run if they left for the south? Yes, it would. It most certainly would. Her thoughts were emphatic.

  And now Sally and Mick were going too, and she couldn’t blame them. Mick was right to go. Even the Co-op had cut back on its staff lately, and who knew who’d be the next to go? And Mick would find it impossible to get work if he lost his job there. There were a hundred or more men to every job nowadays, some of them having walked miles in the vain hope they might get set on. And it wasn’t just the older men, the ones past working age, who hoarded their Woodbine ends in little tin boxes and raided the tips in the dead of night, digging for cinders to hawk about the doors at twopence a bucket. No, it was the young ones too now, some only in their twenties, but a white-faced wife and hungry bairns had made them swallow what little pride they had left after months and months out of work and do what they would have considered unthinkable just a couple of years before.

  Rosie had always bought a bucket or two every time they called until, with a mountain of virtually unusable cinders piling up in the cellar, Zachariah had told her he would start answering the door. Word had got round she was an easy touch, he’d said, and it had become ridiculous. So she’d let him go to the door, and the mountain had continued to grow. ‘Them poor blighters.’ Every time he had doled out another shilling or two he had come and found her, his eyes screwed up with pity. ‘By, no man should be reduced to bein’ without hope.’ Rosie had been thinking the same thing herself, and along with her plans for the move into the country she had been wondering how many jobs a little farm could provide. Her contribution might be a drop in the ocean in the mass unemployment gripping the north, but to the men they could give work to it would be the difference between holding their heads high or grovelling in the gutter.

  Just before ten Sally and Mick rose to leave, and Rosie stood too, saying, ‘I’ll walk with you to the tram stop, I could do with a spot of fresh air.’ She called up to Zachariah to tell him where she was going and that she would only be a minute or two - he was nursing Erik back to sleep, the baby having awoken earlier with teething pains - and shut the front door behind her as she followed Sally and Mick down the garden path and out onto the pavement.

  They were laughing as they strolled arm-in-arm to the tram stop at the end of the street, Sally at her best as she regaled them with the latest stories from the Store, and as Rosie lifted her face to the cool salty breeze she was conscious of thinking, Things are only going to change, not necessarily be worse. I’ve got to be positive, that’s the thing. And then the next moment she heard Zachariah’s voice and turned, her arms still linked in Sally’s and Mick’s and her face smiling, and saw her husband tearing along the street as fast as his awkward gait would allow, Erik clutched tightly in his arms.

  ‘What is it?’ She had wrenched her arms free and met Zachariah a few feet from the tram stop, her stomach turning over at the look on his face. ‘What’s wrong?’

  She couldn’t hear what Zachariah said at first - Erik was howling enough to wake the dead - but then, when he repeated, ‘You should have told me you were leaving the house, I don’t want you out here by yourself,’ she stared at him in absolute amazement.

  ‘I’m not by myself, I’m with Sally and Mick.’ She indicated the other couple who were standing some distance away, clearly bemused by the turn of events. ‘Whatever’s the matter?’

  He didn’t answer her, saying instead, ‘Here’s the tram.’

  ‘Zachariah.’

  ‘Later, I’ll tell you later. Say goodbye to Sally an’ Mick.’

  The tram had barely pulled away when Rosie turned to Zachariah, having taken Erik from his arms as she tried to soothe the baby with meaningless nonsense, and said over the fair downy head, ‘Well?’

  ‘It’s nothin’. I just don’t want you out here in the dark by yourself, that’s all. Next time you’re leavin’ like that give me a bit of warnin’.’

  ‘Nothing?’ Rosie’s voice was too shrill and as Erik began to wail again she lowered it an octave or two as she repeated, ‘Nothing? Zachariah, you frightened me to death, and as for it being dark, it’s hardly that.’ She indicated the dusky twilight with a bob of her head. ‘There’s still plenty of light and it’s really warm.’

  ‘I don’t want you out here by yourself, Rosie. That’s all.’

  ‘It’s not all.’ She clutched at him as he made to turn, her eyes enormous in the dim light. ‘Something has happened, hasn’t it? I want to know, Zachariah. Tell me.’

  ‘It’s nothin’.’

  Her brows came together. ‘Nothing? With you racing down the street yelling your head off?’ She bent her body towards him and her voice, although low, was weighty as she said, ‘I’m not a child, Zachariah, neither am I stupid. Tell me.’

  Zachariah stared at her. They had been so happy the last few months, so marvellously, gut-wrenchingly happy. And if he told her, if he related what was no more at bottom than an old woman’s fears and imaginings, Shane McLinnie would once again have an insidious and prominent place in their lives. And he didn’t deserve it, the scum simply didn’t deserve it, damn him. But if he didn’t tell her, how c
ould he stop her doing things like this? Natural, ordinary things, but things that just couldn’t be done while there was the faintest possibility of that scab skulking around.

  He told her. Out in the street, with the warm, flower-scented air from the front gardens vying with the sea-crusted breeze, he told her exactly what Davey had imparted to him the night before. Rosie’s grip on her son tightened, and she swallowed twice and moved her head before she managed to say, ‘I hate Shane. I do, I hate him.’ Zachariah took her arm, bending close to her and pulling her into his body with the baby sandwiched between them.

  ‘It will be all right. Trust me, lass.’ He smiled, but for the life of her she couldn’t dredge up an answering smile. ‘I’ve put me feelers out an’ me arm is longer than his, whatever he might think. We’ll soon know if there’s anythin’ brewin’.’

  ‘How dare he?’ Indignation followed hard on the shock, and now Rosie’s face was scarlet with anger as she repeated, ‘How dare he think he can intimidate us, Zachariah? If there is anything in this, this is the last time he interferes with my life. I’ve had enough, more than enough, and I shall tell him so to his face.’

  ‘You won’t, lass.’ His voice was sharp. ‘Now I want your word on that. I don’t want you within a mile of that scum.’

  Rosie took a step backwards. Zachariah had never used that tone with her before, even in their argument about her going to the brothel to see Molly, and she didn’t like it. ‘He needs to be told,’ she said tightly. ‘He seems to think he can do anything he likes.’

  ‘An’ he’ll find out he can’t, right? But you seein’ him will do no good at all. Now I’m not jestin’, lass. I want your promise you won’t get involved in any of this. Come on, promise me.’

  ‘No.’

  ‘No?’

  It was their second serious altercation, but then Zachariah cut through her defences when he said, his voice soft and loving and his own again, ‘Rosie, lass, I shan’t know a moment’s peace if you don’t. Please, lass.’

  In that moment she was tempted to promise him anything, but she couldn’t. She stared at him for a second, her eyes soft, and then she said, ‘I can’t, Zachariah, not in all honesty, but I promise I won’t do anything foolish like seeing him alone. Will that do?’

  He shook his head slowly. ‘Not really, but knowin’ you when you get the bit between your teeth it’s the best I’m goin’ to get, eh?’

  His tone was wry, and as he pulled her close again, the baby snuggled between them, Rosie relaxed against him.

  He had known all along, hadn’t he? Hadn’t he? Aye, but he had hoped against hope he was wrong.

  It was a few days later and the weather had broken, violent thunderstorms shaking the heavens in the last two days, but this particular evening, although cool, was quiet and still. Zachariah was in the kitchen and Rosie was upstairs in the nursery, and now Zachariah took a hard pull of air deep into his lungs before turning to the man sitting opposite him at the scrubbed kitchen table and saying, ‘I appreciate you comin’, Alec. An’ you say there’s no doubt he means to do for me?’

  Alec Piper shook his head, his heavy lids unblinking as he looked straight at his friend and said, ‘None, Zac. But the man’s a fool for all his wheelin’ an’ dealin’. You’ve plenty of pals an’ that’s somethin’ that don’t seem to have got through his thick skull. You’ve got to sort this one out, man. You know what I mean? Big Abe could put the frighteners on the bloke who’s helpin’ McLinnie with his dirty work this time, but what about the next an’ the next? If you dinna fix him you’re gonna be lookin’ over your shoulder for the rest of your days. No, you’ve got plenty of pals an’ you need ’em for this, Zac, an’ I don’t mean givin’ him just a beatin’ either. It needs to be permanent.’

  ‘Aye.’ Zachariah swallowed deeply, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. He knew Alec was just waiting for him to say the word and Shane McLinnie would draw his last breath, but they were talking cold-blooded murder here, damn it. He didn’t think he’d be able to sleep at night with a man’s blood on his conscience, even blood as tainted and foul as McLinnie’s.

  ‘He’s bin doin’ business with the Gallaghers up in Glasgow, dealin’ in all sorts. You know he was in with that bunch?’

  ‘No, no I didn’t.’ The Gallaghers were notorious far beyond the boundaries of Scotland for their contempt for human life, which was reflected in their empire of hard crime and prostitution rackets. If Shane was one of their boys now he’d sold his soul to the devil.

  ‘He’s bin doin’ deals for ’em down here, so I understand. ’

  Zachariah was thinking fast. Smuggling tobacco and the like was one thing, hadn’t his own mam and da been up to their necks in the trade, but the Gallaghers were living embodiments of evil. Even so . . . No, he couldn’t countenance murder. But if the right people dealt with this, Shane McLinnie wouldn’t make the mistake of coming after him again. Alec’s cohorts could be very persuasive; he had seen the results of some of their inducements and it wasn’t pretty. It would do the trick; Alec could make Shane wish he’d never been born.

  ‘He needs teachin’ a lesson, that’s for sure, but to tell you the truth, Alec, I’m not too keen on the other. I’ve not the stomach for it.’

  ‘He wouldn’t think twice about doin’ you in, man. That’s what this is all about, for cryin’ out loud.’

  ‘Aye I know, I do know, but it don’t alter what I feel in me guts. A good hidin’, somethin’ he’ll carry for the rest of his life is enough.’

  Alec cast a sideward glance at his friend before shaking his head slowly. ‘You’re playin’ a dangerous game, Zac. Far better to do the job clean. He’s down at the docks most nights an’ it could be quick an’ painless if that’s the way you want it. Meself I’d make the scum suffer a bit first if he was after me or mine.’

  Zachariah didn’t comment on this. He knew Alec wasn’t jesting and there was nothing he could say. There was silence for a minute or two and Zachariah poured them both another tot of whisky from the bottle on the table before he said, ‘An’ it was planned for the day after next, you say?’

  ‘Aye. Seems you go into Gateshead on the last Thursday of the month an’ call in for a bevvy with Tommy Bailey on the way back? Well they must’ve bin watchin’, ’cos they’ve got it all clocked. Makes sense when you think about it, them goin’ for the pair of you when you leave the pub. Fights happen like that all the time.’

  Zachariah nodded. Aye, it made sense all right. Two men involved in a bust-up was different to a man alone being set upon. And if one poor devil was left lying dead in a dark street that was just a fight that had gone too far, wasn’t it?

  ‘Seems you normally have a drink in the Dog and Rabbit?’ Alec was still talking. ‘Well, it would’ve bin your last one.’ He leant back in the seat and surveyed Zachariah through slitted eyes. ‘Still want to turn the other cheek?’

  ‘I’m not talkin’ about turnin’ the other cheek, man, an’ you know it. What if . . .’ Zachariah tapped his fingers on the arms of the wooden chair in which he was sitting a number of times before he continued, his voice low, ‘What if I went to Gateshead as normal an’ got back at me usual time, everythin’ nice and friendly. An’ me an’ Tommy have our darts an’ pint, but there’s a couple of extras in the pub that night, know what I mean? An’ they happen to leave just after us but careful like. An’ they see these fellas attack us . . .’

  ‘Aye, I know just the type. Invisible when they want to be.’

  ‘An’ they’ll keep their mouths shut?’

  ‘Need you ask? But I still reckon you ought to have the job done properly. The more I hear about this bloke McLinnie the less I like him.’ Alec downed his drink in one gulp and stood up. ‘But there’s no changin’ your mind once it’s made up, I know that of old. I just hope you don’t live to regret it.’

  ‘It worked with Charlie Cullen.’ Zachariah grinned as he too rose from the table, but when there was no answering smile on Alec’s face he leant
across and tapped the other man’s arm as he said, ‘I don’t have a choice, man, that’s the thing. I couldn’t look me little ’un in the face when he’s older if I had blood on me hands.’

  Alec looked at him for a moment before pursing his lips and shaking his head. ‘By, I’m glad I’m not a family man, Zac, that’s all I can say. If this is what bein’ wed does to you, you can keep it.’

  It was heartfelt, and now Zachariah was smiling broadly. ‘Aye, well, everyone to their own, Alec, eh? I wouldn’t swop my lot for all the tea in China an’ that’s the truth.’

  Alec had gone and Zachariah was in the garden when Rosie came downstairs. The leaves on the trees were trembling slightly and the twilight was golden-hued, the air scented with the summer smell that comes after rain, as she plumped down beside him on the garden bench. ‘What are you doing sitting out here? It’s a bit chilly.’

  ‘Is it?’ Zachariah had turned to her as she sat down, and now he continued to stare at her, taking in every contour of her face. He had already decided he wasn’t going to tell her what Alec had discovered, so now, when Rosie said, ‘Well? What did Alec have to say?’ he answered, ‘Just reportin’ on how things are goin’, that’s all. Didn’t want me to think he wasn’t botherin’, I suppose.’

  Rosie looked at him long and hard before she said, ‘And?’

  ‘Nothin’ to tell as yet.’

  ‘I see.’ She had suspected he was going to try and keep her out of this and so she had felt no compunction in listening to his conversation with Alec from her vantage point in the hall. And of the two men she had to admit she felt Alec had a more realistic understanding of Shane McLinnie. Not that she could countenance cold-blooded murder any more than Zachariah could. But there were other ways to deal with Shane McLinnie and make sure he was put away for good.

  They continued to sit in the garden until it was quite dark. Not kissing, not even talking, just holding each other close in the cool soft darkness as the world outside their sanctuary fell silent and even the birds stopped their twittering and settled down for the night. But although she sat quietly, even serenely, Rosie was far from quiet and serene inside.