She burst into tears. He took her in his arms and cradled her gently as she cried into his shoulder. She let him. She needed someone.
“I’m so sorry,” he said softly. “But it’s okay, we’ll have more children.”
She pulled back from him. Her eyes could barely stay focused and she was cloudy from the medication.
“How did I know that you were pregnant?” she slurred. “How did I know that you were sick? How did I know that you were in the hospital? And what do you mean, “We’ll have more children”?” she demanded drowsily.
He brushed the hair out of her eyes and caressed her cheek.
“Don’t worry about anything, Claudia,” he comforted her. “Everything will be okay, I promise. For now, you need to get some more rest.”
He kissed her on her forehead and she fell asleep again.
When she woke up later Gil was gone. Her memory was such a blur that she wondered if he really had been in her room or not. Maybe it was just another whacky dream.
Chapter 34
Claudia awoke from a night of restless sleep. At first, it seemed she was waking up from a bad dream, but then she remembered the events of the day before and her heart sank. She had lost her baby.
She felt dazed and weak and her vision was blurry. She fought to open her eyes and as she did she could see the silhouette of a man sitting beside her. Oh, for fuck’s sake. What was Gil doing here again? Couldn’t he just leave her alone? She was recuperating from surgery and she wanted to be by herself for a while.
“Why are you here again?” she asked in frustration.
There was a pause. She’d offended him. Good.
“But I thought you’d be glad to see your Australian translator!”
Her heart skipped a beat.
“Jeremy?”
“You’re supposed to say, “G’day mate”!”
Hearing his cheerful, laid-back voice was soothing to her, like sinking into a warm bath.
Her eyes focused and she could see him. He gave her a tired smile and ran his hand through his unruly curls. He wore a crumpled pin-stripe suit. The top button of his shirt was undone and his tie was loosened. His suitcase and laptop bag were on the floor beside him. She was relieved and excited that it was Jeremy, and not Gil. She had missed him so much, and especially now.
“Jeremy!”
“Hi, sweetheart,” he said as he kissed her gently on the forehead. Today he didn’t smell like the ocean or coconut surfboard wax, he smelled fresh and earthy, like the air after a light rain.
“What are you doing here?”
“I just finished my contract in Hong Kong and I’m on a 5-hour layover in SFO before I head on to Chicago for a week,” he explained. “I wanted to surprise you with a visit. When you weren’t at home or answering your phone I was worried. I went to your office and your receptionist told me what had happened. I was…devastated,” he said with tears in his eyes.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” she said sadly. “I wanted to, but it all happened so fast. I did a home pregnancy test yesterday morning and it was positive. I was in shock. I was also in a lot of pain so I went to the doctor and before I knew it I was in surgery.”
He squeezed her hand.
“I’m sorry you went through this alone.”
“That’s okay,” she said. “I can handle it. I’ve been alone a long time.”
This made him feel sad. He’d been alone a long time too.
“I want to talk to you about that,” he said. “But first, are you okay?”
“I’m okay, but I’m not at my best,” she said apologetically.
Claudia looked around her. She was a mess. She was hooked up to various machines and there was a bedpan sitting on a side table. An untouched cup of tea and a slice of toast with a bite taken out of it sat on a tray beside her. She was wearing a pink hospital gown with nothing underneath and she wore a pair of beige slipper socks. She hadn’t showered for two days or brushed her teeth, and she wasn’t wearing any makeup. She was very embarrassed by her appearance. The first time she saw Jeremy she was totally overdressed and today she was completely underdressed.
He didn’t notice any of that. Her natural beauty held him captivated. He gazed at her clear, bare skin and flushed cheeks. Her hazel eyes seemed honey-colored against her untamed auburn hair. She looked raw, natural, and flawless.
“This is the first time I’ve seen you without makeup,” he said, “and you’ve never looked more beautiful to me than you do now.”
Claudia didn’t believe him but she didn’t want to spoil the moment so she accepted his compliment. Then she noticed a massive bunch of red roses on the table beside her bed.
“Those roses are beautiful!” she shrieked. “Thank you! You shouldn’t have…”
He looked down at the floor.
“I didn’t,” he admitted sheepishly. “They’re not from me.”
Claudia should have known. It was an ostentatious gesture that smacked of Gil Godsend. Clearly Gil had been there in her room. It wasn’t just another whacky dream.
“But I did bring you this,” he said as he reached into his suitcase and pulled out a plush stuffed koala. “I saw it at the airport the day we said goodbye, and it reminded me of how much you loved petting the koalas at the zoo. I bought it for you and I’ve carried it around with me since then, waiting for the day I could give it to you in person.”
She was moved. This meant far more to her than an expensive bunch of roses. It was thoughtful and genuine.
“That’s very sweet of you,” she said as she took the toy from him and cuddled it. “Thank you.”
Jeremy took a deep breath and loosened his tie some more.
“Claudia, you thought I was someone else when you woke up, and here’s this enormous bunch of red roses. I’m guessing they’re from that Gil Gottfried bloke.”
His joke came out sounding more bitter than he had intended.
“Look, if you guys have something going on then I can step aside,” he said. “I’ll understand. Just let me know.”
This did look bad. Gil had been pursuing her and if she was honest with herself, she’d had fleeting moments when she had wondered, what if? Gil was trying to reel her back in again, but she was resisting him. She felt guilty that she’d mistaken Jeremy for Gil when she woke up, but didn’t he notice that she had sounded irritable, not happy, when she thought Gil was there? Also, she had mistakenly thought that the roses were from Jeremy, not Gil. Surely these things showed her true feelings.
Gil was her past.
“Gil was here just to say goodbye,” she explained. “He’s leaving the country, he didn’t even tell me where he’s traveling to. Believe me, there’s nothing going on between him and me.”
She was adamant.
Jeremy looked relieved. He cleared his throat.
“Claudia,” he said cautiously, “When we said goodbye I realized that my feelings for you were very strong. I thought, don’t be a mug, this is just a holiday romance, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. The time we spent together gave me some of the best memories of my life and I’d… I’d like to make more memories with you.”
He paused. She stiffened. Was he going to ask her to marry him? Surely this was too soon…
“I… want to find a way for us to be together,” he said. “I want to give a relationship with you a fair go. I want to see what happens.”
Claudia’s heart soared. This was exactly what she wanted.
“I feel the same way too,” she said.
A smile spread across his face.
“But…”
His smile fell.
“…But I’m concerned because our lives are so complicated,” she continued. “Long distance relationships are difficult. We live in different countries and you’re always traveling.”
This was the reason his last relationship failed, she thought warily.
“I’m tired of being on the road all the time. I’m bloody sick of living out of
suitcases in hotel rooms,” he said with a nod towards his bags on the floor. “I’m home so rarely that my own apartment looks like a hotel room. I want a home… I want a family.”
That stung them both a little, knowing what they’d just lost.
“I’m prepared for the effort it’ll take to make this work,” said Claudia. “Are you?”
“I am,” he replied. “I’ll take some time off from work so we can be together, or I’ll get a transfer to our San Francisco office. I’ll do whatever it takes. I don’t want to lose you,” he said. His eye contact was steady but soft. “What’s just happened to you…to us…has only proven to me that life is too short and I need to follow my heart.”
That’s exactly what her father would have said.
Jeremy was right. Life was too short. She had been wasting time trying to help people who didn’t want her help. In her job she had been experiencing the heartbreak of relationships without getting to experience the joy that relationships can bring. She needed to take happiness where she could find it, and her happiness was with him.
Gil was her past.
Jeremy was her future.
“Okay,” she answered, lost in thought. Then she realized how half-hearted that sounded. “I mean yes,” she said with certainty. “Yes!”
Jeremy’s vivid green eyes lit up. He wanted to pick her up and dance with her around the room, but she was too fragile for that right now. Instead he kissed her cheek and hugged her.
He checked his watch.
“Shit! If I don’t leave for the airport right now I’m going to miss my flight,” he said. “But you have no idea how much I want to stay here and take care of you.”
Claudia wanted him to stay too. She didn’t want to go back to an empty apartment. She pictured herself going home with Jeremy. She saw herself snuggling up to him on the couch as they watched a movie together. She felt his warm body up against hers in bed at night. She smelled the delicious breakfasts he would cook for them every morning. He seemed to be thinking the same things.
“Just say the word and I’ll stay,” he said.
Please stay, she thought.
But she wanted to be strong. She didn’t want to be a burden to him. She also didn’t want to be the reason he lost his job. They would sort it all out in time.
“Go catch your flight,” she said regretfully. “I’m just going to be laid up in bed all week.”
He hesitated.
“Are you sure?”
“…Yes…”
“Okay,” he said reluctantly. “But I’ll call you when I land in Chicago.”
Jeremy kissed Claudia goodbye, but only goodbye for now, and he left.
Her body still ached, but her heart wasn’t aching as much anymore.
Then Claudia was alone again. She sighed, clutched her toy koala, and looked around the room. She saw the huge bunch of red roses. It would have been a kind and loving gesture if they had been from Jeremy, but because they were from Gil it felt like an attempt at manipulation. What did Gil want from her? Well, she knew what he wanted.
He wanted her.
She spied a small card among the flowers. She reached over to get it, and hurt her side as she did so. Damn you, Gil. She opened up the card but there were no words inside, just a long telephone number written in Gil’s handwriting.
She googled the prefix and traced the number to Belize.
Chapter 35
Claudia sat on the edge of her hospital bed. She was finally going home today! She had taken a shower, brushed her teeth, and changed out of her hospital gown back into her own clothes. Her appetite had returned and she was eager to get out of hospital and have a latte and a blueberry muffin. She almost felt human again.
Her doctor paid her a final visit and he was pleased with her progress. She was ready to be discharged. Despite the ectopic pregnancy, and losing a tube and an ovary, he told her that she would likely be able to have a healthy pregnancy in future, if she decided to ditch the birth control.
Maybe I’ll be leaving the hospital with a baby in my arms next time, she hoped.
As she waited for nurse Nicole to discharge her, Claudia flicked through the morning’s newspaper. One headline in particular caught her eye.
Night Owl Host Charged with Sexual Assault.
According to the article, veteran talk show host Michael Michaels had been arrested and charged with multiple counts of sexual assault. But this was just the tip of the iceberg. The news emboldened a parade of other women to come forward with their stories of harassment and assault at his hands. They were celebrities, interns, and even his dry cleaner. Where there is one there are usually others, and there is strength in numbers. The police urged other victims to speak up.
Claudia wondered if she should speak up too.
His Modus Operandi was to make inappropriate sexual advances towards his female guests before their appearance on his show, with the promise that he would further their careers if they would go on a date with him. He did research and background checks on all of them and if a woman refused to go out with him, he revealed her dark secrets, and some lies, during her interview and damaged her reputation publicly. This story sounded familiar to Claudia. If the woman agreed to go out with him, he gave her good publicity on the show. Afterwards, he took her out for a drink, got her liquored up, and then dragged her back to his place where he sexually assaulted her.
It seemed that Claudia dodged a bullet.
One victim was fellow talk show host Julie Davenport who appeared on Night Owl the week before Claudia did. Julie took up his offer and went on a date with him after the show. When they got back to his place he pressed her up against a wall, choked her, slapped her across the face several times and then had sex with her.
Claudia didn’t like Julie at all, but she believed that no woman should have to go through that.
Of course, Michaels denied the allegations, saying that all of these women had consensual “rough sex” with him, of the kind found in erotic romance novels. He became the victim. He complained that he was the target of disgruntled and jealous ex-lovers who were angry because they could never “win” him.
The reporter investigated Michaels and dug up a lot of dirt on him.
He had a 20-year-old criminal record for frotteurism. As a teenager he had been caught rubbing his genitalia against women’s thighs and bottoms on a crowded BART train. When he was imprisoned overnight he tried to do it to a fellow prisoner. He was put on probation for a year and ordered to undergo psychiatric counseling. A year later he was caught doing it again at a shopping mall in the food court.
His ex-wife also revealed his fetish for domination and sadism that supported the victims’ claims. She wasn’t interested in that sort of thing herself, not that it stopped him from doing it to her, and so she divorced him. With no outlet for his obsession he started seeing prostitutes and dominatrices around the Bay Area. That is, until he had enough celebrity power that he could abuse it. According to his wife, he had a large collection of clothes pegs too, although she didn’t know what he did with them. It was just another weird thing about him.
When media reports of the scandal first emerged, the television network fired Michaels from his job. They also dismissed his long-term producer Peter Peters, for covering up for him all of these years. With Michaels gone, Julie Davenport was offered the role of hosting Night Owl although her response was, “No thanks. Nobody watches that show!”
Michaels’ lawyer said his client would be pleading not guilty and that he planned to launch a lawsuit for defamation against the network and his victims. Michaels was granted bail, set at $100,000, on the condition that he surrender his passport and live with his mother while the case was heard. He was forced to wear an electronic tag around his ankle while he was under house arrest at his mommy’s house.
Whose credibility was damaged now?
Claudia smiled to herself. She didn’t believe in karma or the Law of Cause and Effect. Poetic justice is for fiction. Peo
ple don’t always reap what they sow, and what goes around doesn’t always come around, but occasionally, when bad people keep doing bad things, they eventually get caught…
After she was discharged, Claudia presented the enormous bunch of red roses to nurse Nicole.
“These are for you from that sharp-dressed guy who was here the other day,” she said.
“You mean Gil Godsend?” Nicole cried, patting her chest in surprise.
“That’s him!”
“They’re beautiful! So… you’re not with him?” she asked carefully.
“Absolutely not.”
“Oh my,” she said as she checked the card and saw the telephone number written inside.
Then Claudia left the hospital and went home.
Chapter 36
It had been three months since her surgery and things were going well for Claudia. Her business was flourishing and so was her bank account. Jeremy was in her life. He had already made three trips to visit her in San Francisco. Gil was finally out of her life. She hadn’t heard from him since he visited her in the hospital. Everything was great, although she felt like something was missing. She couldn’t put her finger on what that was.
One morning, Claudia was making herself a breakfast burrito when she received a call from Banachek. He had been away on tour so she hadn’t heard from him in months.
“Hello, my friend.”
“Hi Banachek!” she said excitedly. “Long time, no hear. What crazy place are you in today? Kathmandu? Timbuktu?”
“I’m in the craziest place I’ve ever been!” he replied.
"Where’s that?”
“San Francisco!” he said with a laugh. “How about we meet up for dinner tonight?”
That night, Claudia and Banachek met at Cha Cha Cha, a South American restaurant in the Haight-Ashbury district of San Francisco. The place was decked out like it was carnival time, with masks, beads, paper lanterns, and string lights. The brightly painted walls were lined with Santeria shrines decorated with offerings to the saints. The room was packed with people enjoying seafood paella and pitchers of sangria while they talked loudly to compete with the pulse of salsa music.
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