Best Played (Salt Lake Pumas)

by Camellia Tate

  “Perhaps not quite like that,” he commented. “But everyone’s different. I don’t see Rachel and Tim being like that, but they’ve got different sorts of affections. You and Olle just seem very interested in each other. It’s obvious you like each other. He’s good to you, isn’t he?”

  That was such a dad question, I almost laughed.

  Everything seemed to slow; I knew I only had a split second to answer this question. If I hesitated, Daddy would be convinced that Olle wasn’t as good to me as he should be, and then we’d all be in trouble!

  “Of course, Daddy,” I answered. And it was true; Olle might not have known me very long, but he’d been good to me so far. As well as agreeing to come with me to Rachel’s wedding, he’d also offered to sleep on the floor just so I’d be comfortable.

  I chuckled. “Apart from forgetting that he’d actually met me before that party, he’s been great.” And I couldn’t blame Olle for that!

  It made Daddy laugh, too. “Yeah, but did he meet you as a fan?” he asked, the tone teasing. I could hardly deny it, Olle had met me as a fan. He’d signed a jersey for me and while he might not remember it because he signed so many, it was definitely a memory I treasured.

  Of course, now, a lot of those memories were being overwritten by even better memories. Like sleeping next to Olle, the way he shifted in closer once he’d fallen asleep.

  “See, that,” Daddy said, startling me back into focus. “The way you smile when you think about him. That’s how I know he’s being good to you.”

  “Daddy!” I whined, feeling a flush rising to my cheeks. “If you keep making fun of me, I won’t bring him back again!” But of course, after this wedding, I would have no reason to bring Olle back.

  The thought rang unpleasantly through me, sadness welling up from some deep place I barely recognized.

  “Anyway. Are you looking forward to the wedding?” Daddy’s eyes glittered at me and I cut him off before he could make an awful joke. “Rachel’s wedding! Is your speech all ready?”

  Thankfully, he didn’t push it, just giving a deep chuckle and then shaking his head. “It’s mostly ready, but actually, if you wanted to help me a bit, I’d really appreciate it,” he commented, before nodding at the door. “Close the door, so no one overhears us. I’ll let you read it.”

  I could hardly turn down an offer like that. There was also something very sweet about him asking me for help. Being able to admit not being able to do something was a trait I’d always admired in my dad.

  It was a privilege to be able to sit there and witness the love my dad had poured into the words. The further I got into the speech, the more I felt a pang in my chest. One day, I wanted my dad to be able to stand up and welcome my partner into the family the way he was doing for Tim.

  First, I had to find someone. A man who’d love me and come to meet my family for real. It shouldn’t be so difficult, and I resolved to make more of an effort to be serious about any future relationships.

  But right now, Olle was more than enough man for me to worry about! We only had to keep up the act for a few more days, no matter how guilty I might feel about deceiving my family about something that was actually important.

  Daddy’s speech was pretty great, even without my input. All I added was a couple of details he hadn’t necessarily known about the very beginning of Rachel and Tim’s relationship. She’d shared a lot more of her dating stories with me and Steph than she had with our dad!

  Leaving his study, I tried to ignore the guilt simmering inside me. It was good that Daddy liked and respected Olle. It would have been a total nightmare if I’d brought him here under false pretenses and Daddy had been rude to him.

  I just hadn’t expected Daddy to get on with him so well. Better than he’d gotten on with any of the boys I’d brought home from school. But they’d been boys, not men. Maybe when I found someone to introduce to my family for real, it wouldn’t go as badly as I’d always feared.

  Olle was back from his run and the whole family had lunch together before I whisked Olle off. I was worried he might need more privacy and time alone than he was getting. Besides, an hour or two free from the guilt of lying would be a relief.

  “Do you want to go to the gym?” I suggested. “I know I can’t spot you on the free weights, but I can cheer you on while you use the machines.”

  I didn’t let the way Olle laughed with amusement make my heart skip faster. It shouldn’t matter if I made him laugh. Overall, I was doing a pretty okay job at pretending that it didn’t. Like the laugh didn’t warm my whole body, making me want to make Olle laugh more often.

  “No, it’s okay. I appreciate the offer, cheering or spotting, but I think I’ll have a rest day today and then go in the morning tomorrow,” he commented. Taking a seat on the bed, Olle gave me a look. “Unless you wanted to go to the gym? I probably could spot you, though I don’t know what you lift.”

  I snorted, a blush creeping along my cheekbones at how unladylike a sound I’d made. But Olle didn’t seem to mind. If anything, his eyes sparkled as if he liked making me laugh almost as much as the reverse.

  “I never really learned to lift,” I answered, shaking my head. “I prefer exercise outdoors, when the weather allows it.” Which, in the middle of summer, it definitely did.

  Taking a seat next to Olle, I tried not to think about his muscular thigh pressing against mine. “I just figured it would give you a break from socializing. You’re not as much of an extrovert as my family, are you?”

  “Ah.” He clicked his tongue. “No probably not, but you shouldn’t worry about it too much. I’m pretty used to an energetic buzz of people around me. As long as your family doesn’t mind me not talking constantly.” He smiled. They didn’t but I could tell I didn’t need to reassure Olle of that.

  My family didn’t at all seem to mind that Olle was more on the quiet side. Nor did I. If anything, it was nice to feel like I was being listened to. The fact that Olle seemed to actually retain what I said was sweet, too.

  “So what kind of outside exercise? Like yoga?” he asked, drawing me back to the conversation.

  I did know some people who did yoga outside, but that wasn’t exactly what I’d had in mind. “Riding, swimming, long walks in the hills,” I answered instead. “I’ve gone skiing a couple of times with Steph and that’s always good fun. I’d like to get good at it.”

  On the other hand, I also liked variety. That was why I hadn’t committed to spending all my vacations on the ski slopes.

  “What about you?” I asked. “You’ve been out here a couple of days, do you enjoy the landscape?” It was very different from Salt Lake. And, I assumed, even more different from Sweden.

  “It’s beautiful,” Olle replied without any hesitation. “It’s everything you said it would be and more! I’m definitely not disappointed.” That made me smile widely. Of course, I hadn’t wanted him to be disappointed, but I still felt like Olle wasn’t really getting much out of this agreement. He was helping me avoid being seeing as alone...

  ...except, of course, now I felt bad about pretending.

  “What’s with the face?” There was a frown on Olle’s face as he asked me that. “You went from fairly happy-looking to... sad? Are you sad?”

  “No, of course not.” I didn’t even pause to consider. My guilt and my problems with my family were mine to deal with. I wasn’t about to load Olle down with burdens that had nothing to do with him.

  He wasn’t my real boyfriend, after all.

  So I shook my head, pasting on a smile that I hoped would be convincing. “I’m fine. I was just thinking you should be seeing more of Tennessee, if you want.”

  The way that frown stayed between Olle’s eyebrows, I could tell he wasn’t convinced. And if I hadn’t been able to guess, then he basically told me as much anyway.

  “You can tell me if something is worrying you,” he told me. “I know we’re not... friends, I guess. But as your fake boyfriend, I do feel that I should be allowed to
make things better for you. Or at least try. Unless you’re upset because of me?”

  Obviously, I couldn’t let Olle believe it was his fault. That wouldn’t be fair, especially since Olle had only done what I had asked of him.

  “I just had a chat with my dad,” I said slowly. “About how he’s happy that I’ve brought someone home. So I was thinking about how he’s going to feel bad for me when I have to tell him we’ve broken up. And, I guess, I feel a little guilty about that.”

  It honestly hadn’t crossed my mind when I’d first told Rachel I would bring someone. Maybe that was short-sighted of me.

  I shrugged. “It is what it is. They’ll feel bad for me, but I’ll just tell them I’ve gotten over it quickly.”

  Somehow, that made me feel even worse, like I would have to keep lying forever.

  Olle gave a soft ‘ah’ in response. It did very little to ease my guilt. “I’ve thought about that, too,” he admitted, surprising me a little. “Yeah.” He nodded. “Your family has been so nice and welcoming to me, I feel a bit guilty for lying to them.” And, of course, I hadn’t even thought of that, but Olle just seemed such a nice person, lying probably wasn’t the easiest for him either.

  Giving a small shrug, he reached out to poke one finger against my leg. “We’re in it now, though. Let’s just deal with the fallout when it happens, hmm?”

  That was not an approach I was very good at taking... Olle seemed to know it, too, because he laughed.

  “How about we go horse riding? You can teach me, show me around? It’ll make you feel better.”

  It was such a sweet offer - like something that a real friend would suggest. Or a real boyfriend. But I pushed that thought aside. After all, what did I know about real boyfriends would or wouldn’t do?

  I’d seen my friends and siblings with the people they loved, I supposed. And it was easy to imagine Tim or Will suggesting an activity that would cheer up Rachel or Lacey.

  So, before I could question it any further, I nodded. “That’s a great idea,” I agreed. Giving Olle a quick head-to-toe glance, I tried not to let my heart beat harder. “You can ride in that,” I decided. “We’ll need to find a hat that fits you.”

  And just like that, my worries were buried in a rush of preparations and excitement. If this was what it felt like to have a boyfriend, maybe I’d been missing out more than I knew.

  Chapter Ten

  Olle

  I wouldn’t exactly say that I was afraid of horses. They just weren’t... hockey.

  When I told Roxi as much, she laughed at me, which was probably fair. But there was a sort of kindness, too, as she assured me that she’d pick the most docile horse for me. I had no idea what made one horse more docile than another, but I accepted her promise with some ease.

  So far, Roxi had given me no reason not to trust her. Other than lying to her whole family. But so was I. And this was meant to distract us both from that particular reality.

  From the way that Roxi had talked about Lear and then later on about horses in general, I knew she loved this. Still, nothing had prepared me for the way her whole body absolutely lit up when we entered the stables. I’d never seen anyone be so excited over an animal. And I’d seen Felix with his dogs!

  She spoke to every horse there, petting each individually and telling me about their history. Considering that Roxi didn’t even live in the same state as these horses, that was pretty impressive.

  Once the introductions were finished, she picked a horse for me. A tall, broad male called Hansel. When Roxi then picked for herself the horse called Gretel, I joked about whether she planned to get us lost in the woods. Still, I couldn’t help thinking it was kind of cute.

  Maybe less cute was how awkwardly I got on the horse. Roxi did a great job of not laughing at me, but she did still have to help me. It just wasn’t something I knew how to do. But she was pretty excellent at both telling and showing me.

  With both of us finally on the horses, we left the stables, beginning at a slow sort of gait.

  “This is... not awful,” I decided, though I was still a little worried that Hansel would just kick me off his back.

  Roxi, on the other hand, looked totally natural. Her straight back seemed to roll with the bunching of Gretel’s muscles. Licking my lips, I realized I was a little mesmerized. Luckily, I could pass it off as watching her for guidance.

  “This is great,” she retorted, her tone both challenging and teasing. It wasn’t hockey, but I could see that, to Roxi, it had the same kind of feeling. Like you were doing the one thing you were made for and nothing could touch you.

  She glanced back, her hair glowing around her shining face. “You’re doing well,” she assured me. “You only look mostly afraid. Were you this hesitant your first time on skates?”

  “No.” I shook my head. “But on skates, I only fall my own height,” I pointed out. Hansel made a horsey sound then, like he, too, was mocking me. I frowned slightly at the horse and Roxi laughed. It was hard to keep frowning with that as a distraction. Her laugh instantly made me smile, too.

  Thinking back on what I’d first thought about skating, I gave a small shrug. “Perhaps I have the sort of connection with ice that you have with horses,” I decided. “Are you going to let me take you skating since you’ve taken me horse riding?”

  Roxi tipped her head to one side as she slowed Gretel so our horses could walk next to each other. It meant I had to turn my body slightly to see her, and Hansel almost immediately shifted to walk towards them.

  “You have to look straight ahead!” Roxi informed me, making me instantly face forward once more. “It’s like driving a car. Don’t take your eyes off the road.”

  That was a pretty good comparison, even if I felt a lot more vulnerable up here on a horse than I did in a car!

  “I don’t think there’s a rink near here,” Roxi told me apologetically. “Not close enough, anyway. We’re going to be kind of busy with wedding stuff.”

  It hadn’t actually occurred to me that Roxi might take what I said as meaning we should go skating this week. We both lived in Salt Lake and I had pretty easy access to an ice rink.

  “No.” I shook my head, feeling that I had to clarify. “Not this week, I mean...” I bit my lower lip. I suppose that what I was really saying could easily be interpreted as me asking Roxi out. That wasn’t what I had meant either but now that the thought was in my head, it was hard to get rid of it.

  Did I want to ask Roxi out? I certainly enjoyed her company; these past few days had been nice. Under any other circumstances, I wouldn’t be against seeing her again.

  Finally, deciding that I might as well finish my clarification, I carried on, “When we’re back in Salt Lake, I could show you how to skate then? Or take you skating, I don’t know, maybe you already know how?” Skating was not quite the same as horse riding, thankfully.

  “Oh.” I couldn’t fault Roxi for being startled. Not when I’d managed to surprise myself with my invitation. Silence hung between us for so long that it almost pushed me to assure Roxi that she didn’t have to.

  And then she smiled, blushing and looking down, one long curl of hair obscuring her face a little.

  “Yeah, I’d really like that, if you’re sure it wouldn’t be an imposition.” Even her voice sounded shy in a way it usually didn’t, like she couldn’t quite believe what she was saying.

  “I’ve tried it before, but I usually fall down,” she admitted. “And I’d much rather fall from a horse onto soft grass than from my height onto ice!”

  To me, that seemed crazy, the idea that anyone could prefer falling off a horse! But it also made me laugh, shaking my head. It felt like some pressure had eased, awkwardness that had perhaps been coloring the edges ebbing away.

  “I’ll make sure you don’t fall,” I promised easily. I was very good at catching things. Sure, normally it was pucks, but I could stretch myself to attractive red-heads, no doubt.

  Hansel then made another horsy noise, though wh
ether it was to complain I was going too slow, I had no idea. “Does he want us to go faster?” I asked, slightly concerned at the idea that Hansel might just do what he wanted eventually. “I guess, I could go faster?” It was a question, mostly because I truly had no idea of the answer. Thankfully, Roxi was there to support my horse adventure.

  Roxi shook her head. “He’s just chatting with Gretel,” she informed me with such a serious tone that I couldn’t quite tell whether she was joking. It was possible that horses communicated with each other, though I didn’t know whether they would unless they had a reason to.

  “He honestly doesn’t care whether we go faster,” Roxi assured me. “He’s getting old, he’s perfectly happy just to walk.” Feeling relieved, I tried to settle back more comfortably into the saddle.

  Roxi didn’t let me enjoy it for long, though. “I think we should go faster,” she informed me. “But you have to learn how to do a rising trot, otherwise it’ll be miserable. Watch me.”

  She took off ahead of us. After a moment, I started to see what she meant by ‘rising’. As Gretel moved, Roxi was pushing herself up into almost a standing position, then coming back down. As she turned the horse back towards us, I could hear her counting. “One, two, one, two,” as she came up and down.

  “It’s not hard,” she said, breathless and a little flushed as she pulled Gretel back into line with Hansel. “You think you can try it?”

  “Probably,” I answered. “But I’m not going to look as good as you do doing it.” The words were out of my mouth before I could even think about stopping them. It was, of course, completely true. Roxi looked almost as majestic as Gretel did. She was natural, moving with the horse like they were designed to be together.

  Hansel had no such luck. I did still try, urging him to go a little faster just how Roxi instructed me to. My rising and falling didn’t feel particularly majestic. But I was doing it, which was more than I’d expected to be able to.