Rifts and Refrains

by Devney Perry

  If a home is what she wanted, a home is what she’d find.

  “Quinn?” I called into the house.

  “Downstairs!” she hollered back.

  I grinned at Colin and followed him through the kitchen. We both kept our shoes on since I’d made no progress on the floor in the past week since Quinn had surprised me on my doorstep. The free time I’d expected each evening was suddenly nonexistent. Quinn, naked in my bed, took priority over home remodeling.

  “Go grab your backpack,” I told Colin.

  “Okay.” He smiled and raced to his room.

  “Quinn! We gotta go.”

  “I’m coming.” She jogged up the stairs. “Five minutes.”

  “You need to wear shoes, babe.” I frowned at her bare feet as she tiptoed into the bedroom.

  “I’m fine.”

  “Yeah, until you step on a nail I missed when I ripped up the carpet.” I followed her, leaning against the door as she sat on the edge of the bed to pull on her Chucks. “How was your day?”

  “Good. My parents came over this morning to deliver a latte and say hello. Then I spent a few hours writing. How would you feel about a piano in the basement? The keyboard isn’t cutting it.”

  “Whatever you want is fine by me.” Though in about an hour, we’d be talking about which house to have said piano delivered.

  “Thanks.” She hopped up and crossed the room, standing on her toes to give me a kiss. “How was your day?”

  “Good. Better now.”

  It was amazing how good it felt to have someone ask about your day. To kiss you when you got home. And not just someone.

  Quinn was the one.

  “Ready!” Colin raced to us, strapping on his backpack.

  “Did you get your flashlight?” Quinn asked.

  “Yep.”

  “And your pajamas?”

  “Yep,” he answered her with a nod.

  “And your toothbrush?”

  “Uh . . .” He darted into the bathroom. “Got it.”

  “Then let’s load up,” I said. “There’s a cheeseburger at Grandpa’s with my name on it.”

  Quinn kissed me again, then walked beside Colin through the house and to the garage.

  I hadn’t had to sit Colin down and talk to him about Quinn. How she’d meld into our house, and how we’d go about making a two-person family into three. It had just happened seamlessly.

  The day Quinn had returned, I’d kept her in bed all afternoon until it was time to pick up Colin from Vacation Bible School. On the drive home, I’d promised him a surprise when we got to the house.

  Quinn had been sitting outside, waiting. The moment he’d spotted her, he’d bolted from the truck—before I’d fully parked, we’d had words about that—and crashed into her arms. He’d pulled her inside, talked her into a game of checkers and hadn’t even blinked when he’d woken up the next morning to her in the living room wearing one of my T-shirts.

  He’d crawled onto the couch beside her, yawning, and asked if he could have a donut for breakfast.

  I’d said yes.

  Quinn had said no.

  She was unofficially living here, sleeping in my bed. The clothes she’d brought to Bozeman hung in my closet. Her makeup was on the counter in my bathroom.

  No announcement necessary.

  Colin hadn’t asked questions. He was simply glad that she was here. But today, I’d snuck away from the job site a couple hours early to pick him up from day camp.

  We’d had some shopping to do. And some talking.

  “Did you use my drums today?” Colin asked Quinn as we climbed into the truck.

  “Yes. I wrote the part for that song I played you last night.”

  “Cool.”

  “It is cool.” Quinn beamed a smile my way. “And guess what else? I’m going to sing “Love, Always” for the album. Jonas called me today after talking with Harvey and they both love the idea. I’ve been waiting for Nixon to call me and rub it in, but I haven’t heard from him all week. I’m starting to get worried.”

  “Call him.”

  “I’ll text Ethan first.” Her fingers flew over the screen as we drove.

  I was beginning to see how these people fit as an extension of her family, how they loved and protected her like she did with them.

  Which was why I’d made my own phone call to Jonas today.

  Quinn clutched the phone in her lap as she waited for Ethan’s reply, the ding coming seconds later. She read it and gasped.

  “What?”

  She closed her eyes and whispered, “Thank God.”

  “What?” I asked again, but instead of answering, she held up the phone for me to read Ethan’s reply.

  Rehab.

  Nixon had gone to rehab.

  “This is a good thing.” She relaxed into the seat. “A really good thing.”

  “What is?” Colin asked from his seat.

  “Grown-up stuff, bud.”

  “When will I be old enough for grown-up stuff? When I’m twelve?”

  “Eighteen,” I answered at the same time Quinn said, “Twenty-one.”

  Her protectiveness over my son was undeniably sexy.

  “Where are we going?” Quinn asked when I hit Main Street and turned the opposite direction from our parents’ neighborhood.

  “It’s a surprise.”

  She looked at me, then twisted to glance at Colin, who was wearing an enormous smile. “I thought we were having a family backyard campout.”

  It was something we’d done often as kids. My parents and her parents would set up some tents in their backyards and we’d all sleep outside. Or in my mother’s case, pretend she was going to sleep outside until everyone else was tucked in for the night and then sneak inside to her soft bed.

  “Change of plan,” I said. “We are camping. Just us.”

  “Ah.” She nodded. “That sounds good. What about your cheeseburger?”

  “Coolers are already at camp.”

  “We picked up hot dogs, chips and s’mores,” Colin added. “No vegetables.”

  She laughed. “Where are we camping?”

  “You’ll see.”

  She squirmed in her seat, her eyes tracking our every turn as we drove ten miles out of town and pulled off a gravel road into a bare lot. A two-wheel trail had been flatted in the grass and I followed it to a copse of quaking aspens. In the distance, the mountains towered bold and blue, the color nearly as stunning as Quinn’s eyes.

  “Here?” she asked as I shut off the truck.

  I nodded and climbed out, opening the back door for Colin.

  He scrambled out, his backpack forgotten, and raced around the truck to capture Quinn’s hand as she stepped out. “Check out our fire pit.”

  “What is this place?”

  “Ours.” I breathed in the clean air and let the summer sunshine warm my face. “I got a tip about this property about four weeks ago. The real estate agent is a buddy of mine and he thought we might be interested in building a spec home on it.” The tip had come right before Quinn returned to Bozeman for Nan’s funeral. “Walker and I decided to let it go. We’ve been too busy with custom work to think about a spec. But I called the agent yesterday and put in an offer. It got accepted an hour later. What do you think?”

  If she hated it, I’d transfer it into the company’s assets, and Walker and I would build a spec house after all. But if Quinn loved it, this would be home. I loved my house in town, but with three of us, hopefully more one day, we needed space.

  “It’s beautiful.” She smiled and pointed to the mountains. “I want a window with that view.”

  “You can have whatever you want.” I took her hand and walked her to the fire pit Colin and I had built after stopping by the grocery store to fill the coolers and bring them to the lot.

  “I’m not letting you pay for all this yourself. Not if it’s ours.”

  “Fine by me.” We’d figure out the money later. I wasn’t going to tell her how to spend her money, an
d I wasn’t going to pretend she didn’t make more than I ever could either. But that wasn’t a conversation for today. “I’d like to build a home here with some space for our family to grow. We haven’t talked about kids but—”

  “Three. Plus Colin. Four total. I like even numbers.”

  God, I loved this woman. “Four total.”

  She leaned into my arm. “I’m glad we’re camping here. It’s like the first night in a new home.”

  “Me too.” I dropped a kiss to her hair, then left her with Colin as I started to unload the rest of our supplies.

  We set up our tent, spreading out our sleeping bags—Quinn zipped ours together. Then we explored the five acres, earmarking different spots for a potential homesite. When our stomachs growled, I lit a fire and we cooked hot dogs and ate s’mores. And as the night sky faded from blue to black, Colin’s sugar high wore off and I tucked him into bed.

  “Is he asleep?” Quinn asked as I zipped the tent closed.

  “Just about.”

  She yawned and turned her face to the sky. The glow from the fire danced across her skin.

  “Come on.” I waved her out of her camp chair as I hopped up on the open tailgate of my truck. The blankets were already in place.

  She climbed up beside me and we lay down, her tucked into my side, like we’d done time and time again.

  “I called Jonas today.”

  “My Jonas? Why?”

  “Because I’m going to steal a part of you from them. Man to man, I thought it was appropriate to give him a head’s up. Same reason I swung by and paid your dad a visit today too.”

  “Graham . . .”

  I reached over her body and captured her left hand, finding a certain finger, then sliding on a diamond solitaire ring.

  A ring that Nan had left me along with that ugly fucking green chair now in my basement.

  “Oh my god. This is Nan’s ring.” She lifted her hand, staring at the jewel. “She gave it to you? When?”

  “Your dad brought it over today. It was on her list, I guess. She knew it was real. Even when we didn’t, Nan knew.”

  Quinn smiled, a tear dripping from her eye and into her hair.

  “Marry me.” I ran my knuckles over her cheek. “Count stars with me until we’re too old to climb in the back of my truck.”

  “Yes.” She nodded, shifting closer for a kiss. “Yes.”

  “I love you.”

  “I love you too.” She laced her fingers with mine, then turned to the sky with a smile stretched across her beautiful face. “One.”

  “Two.”

  She kissed me again. “Three.”

  We didn’t make it to four.

  Epilogue

  Quinn

  One year later . . .

  “Good luck!” Dad shouted over the roar of the crowd.

  “Thanks,” I mouthed, not even trying to compete against the noise.

  We were backstage and our opener, a band who’d been gaining fame quickly since joining our tour, had the arena rocking. They’d just walked off stage, but the crowd was still cheering as the crew raced to prepare for our set.

  It was the end of another tour and my parents’ first show. They’d been wide-eyed since they’d arrived two hours ago. Soon, Ethan would escort them to a section of seats he’d roped off for my family.

  Walker and Mindy each had beaming smiles on their faces. Evan and Maya had the same awe in their expressions as they looked around, seeing but not hearing much thanks to the noise reduction earmuffs I’d given them in my dressing room.

  Colin was wearing the same, something he grumbled about at each show, but the alternative was he missed the concert, so he wore them begrudgingly.

  This wasn’t Colin’s first time on the tour, and he was enjoying being the resident expert, telling his cousins exactly what to do and bossing his grandparents around. Ethan loved that Colin was his shadow and adored the attention as much as my son.

  My son.

  Three months ago, Colin had officially become mine. The judge had approved the adoption, and though we’d been a family for a year, there was something settling about it being legal.

  “Good luck, Mom!” Colin shouted.

  My heart swelled. He’d been calling me Mom since the judge’s ruling, but I wasn’t used to it yet. “Thanks, buddy.”

  “We’ll meet you after?” Dad asked.

  I nodded, leaning in to speak loud enough for him to hear. “Just stick with Ethan. He’ll take you to the dressing room when it’s over and we’ll regroup there.”

  Graham’s arm slid around my shoulders and he pulled me into his side. His lips brushed the shell of my ear and his beard tickled my cheek. “Have fun.”

  “Thanks.” I blew out a shaking breath and leaned into his strength. My stomach was in knots. My hands were trembling. Whether it was the fact that my family was here or that this was the last show or that we were about to start on a new adventure, I wasn’t sure, but I was nervous.

  Luckily, Graham was here to help me through it. Like he’d been at Nan’s funeral. Like he had been on the start of this tour, standing behind the curtains where I could see him when I sang “Love, Always” for the first time to a live audience.

  It was the second best-selling hit from our new album.

  The first was a song Nixon and Jonas had written after Nix got out of rehab. They’d spent a month together at Jonas’s home in Maine writing. “Mad Alibi” was on track to be our biggest hit to date.

  It was a kickass song with a kickass beat, and when I started it off tonight with the slam of the bass drum, the crowd would explode.

  “Good luck, Quinn!” Mindy waved as Ethan arrived to usher everyone to the VIP section.

  I bent to kiss Colin’s cheek before he started headbanging with his tongue sticking out. It was going to take forever for him to wind down and sleep tonight. That would be my parents’ problem since he was bunking with them. Mom and Dad adored having all of their grandchildren close, so tonight they were having a campout in their hotel suite.

  Ethan had arranged for child-size tents and sleeping bags to be waiting when they arrived after the show.

  My husband and I would have a night alone.

  The morning after Graham proposed, we told Colin the news over a campfire breakfast, and we asked if he would like me to legally become his mother. He screamed yes without hesitation before throwing his arms around my neck.

  So Graham and I married the next weekend. We didn’t want to delay the adoption process, worrying the family justice system might be difficult to navigate. We exchanged vows in my parents’ backyard. I wore a simple, white strapless gown and went barefoot. Graham wore jeans and a white button-up.

  My father was the officiant, and with our family and friends as witnesses, we signed our license without fanfare or fuss. A photo of Graham sweeping me into his arms for a kiss was framed on the fireplace mantel at home.

  “Last show of the tour.” Graham took my face in his hands, dropping his forehead to mine. “Enjoy it, babe. You deserve it.”

  Every nerve ending in my body was alive, sparked with excitement and adrenaline. Each show was fun, but some were out of this world. “It’ll be a good one. I can feel it. Then we’re taking a year off. Minimum.”

  “A year? What about next summer?”

  I leaned back so I could watch the expression on his face. “I’m not taking a newborn baby on the road.”

  “A baby.” He swallowed hard. “You’re pregnant?”

  “I took the test this morning.”

  Graham crushed me against him, burying his face in my hair as his arms banded tight. “I love you.”

  “Love you too.” I breathed in the scent of his shirt and melted into his chest.

  Thank you, Nan. I sent my gratitude to the heavens, hoping she was close enough tonight to hear. She’d brought Graham and me together. She’d returned me to my family. From now until I saw her again, I’d keep sending her my thanks.

  “If it’
s a girl—”

  “We’re naming her Nan.” Graham didn’t let me go until our stage manager cleared her throat behind us, signaling it was time.

  “Go.” My husband winked. “Enjoy the magic hour. Then later, we’ll have a little magic of our own.”

  I pressed my lips to his, lingering for a long moment before stepping away. “Make sure I can see you in the crowd tonight.” I wanted to see him while I sang.

  “I will.” He nodded and disappeared down the hallway, walking behind Kira and the kids.

  One more show.

  After this concert in Seattle, Hush Note was officially on vacation.

  We’d had a hectic summer, traveling and performing. Graham and Colin had joined me when they could, but we’d had too many nights apart. Graham had been working tirelessly, along with Walker, to finish up our home. When we returned to Bozeman tomorrow morning, we’d be moving into our house.

  I was ready for this break. Colin was starting a new school year and I wanted to be the one to chauffeur him around this fall. I wanted some time to just be a mom and relax into the role.

  And my sticks wouldn’t be far away.

  The guys and I had some new ideas for the next album. We’d already informed Harvey that we wouldn’t be creating this one on a deadline. Our plan was to write through video chats and the occasional visit. We were reinventing our process to fit our changing lifestyles. To fit our families.

  Without the pressure, we’d already polished two songs. If we kept it up, we’d have an album wrapped before the baby was born.

  “Ready?” Jonas asked from where he stood with Nixon.

  “Yeah.” I walked over and took his outstretched hand, then I took Nixon’s.

  They clasped grips and tightened our circle. My eyes drifted shut and the noise from the crowd outside faded for just a moment.

  This was our tenth year together. We’d changed a lot in that time. As individuals. As a band. But we fought for this life. We fought for each other. We fought for the music that came from our souls.

  I wasn’t sure what was in store for Hush Note’s future. But together, we’d navigate the way. We’d break the mold for a rock star life and have it all.

  Jonas squeezed my hand before dropping it, and I met his smile with one of my own.