The Biggest Part of Me

by Malinda Martin

  Jason had been worried. The idea of anyone breaking into Jane’s office had concerned him. He told Jane to be extra careful about letting anyone into the building. Thinking through all of this she went to the intercom button and pressing down, asked who was there.

  “Jane, it’s me Ed. Let me come up.”

  Jane hesitated. “What is it, Ed.”

  “Please, Jane. Let me in. I need to talk to you.”

  She hesitated. Finally she said, “Okay, Ed,” and she pressed the unlock button. Meeting him at her door she said, “What are you doing here?”

  He grabbed her and hugged hard, crushing Jane’s ribs. “Jane, I was so worried about you. I heard someone broke into your office. Are you all right?”

  Gasping from his tight hold, she murmured, “I’m fine, Ed.” She pushed him back and asked, “How did you hear about it?”

  “I was working late. What do you think they wanted? Did you have anything valuable there?”

  “I’m not sure what they wanted. I think it might have something to do with CARL. But there was nothing left out for them to get.”

  “You don’t keep CARL documents there?”

  “Listen, after tonight we’re going to keep them under lock and key in the company safe, with security around that.” Sensing that he was waiting for an invitation to sit down she politely asked, “Would you like a cup of tea?”

  “Have you got anything stronger?” Ed walked into the kitchen and began looking through the cupboards for a drink.

  “I think I’ve got some whiskey.” She pulled out a bottle and small glass and poured him a drink. They retreated to the sofa. Ed drank his whiskey while Jane sipped her tea. Ed seemed nervous.

  “Ed, what’s wrong. You’re as jumpy as a cat.”

  “It’s just that I’ve missed you, Jane. My life just isn’t right without you in it.”

  “Ed—“

  “Are you sure we have to wait until this big meeting is over? I can get the paperwork for the divorce going right now and then you can put my ring back on your finger.”

  “I promised Jason. But listen, Ed.” She took a breath and tried to think of the best way to end things with Ed. “Things have changed with Jason and me.”

  Not listening, Ed took another swig and then leaned back against the cushions. He loosened his tie and took a deep breath. Looking at Jane he said, “I was afraid that you had been at the office when someone broke in. I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”

  “That’s really sweet but I’m fine.” Now Jane was getting nervous. She didn’t like the look in Ed’s eyes. She just wanted Ed to leave. She set her teacup down and said, “You know Ed, I’m really tired. I think I should go to bed—“

  “That’s a good idea.” Ed set his glass down and reached for Jane. Before she could react, he had his arms around her and his mouth pressed onto hers.

  Using all her strength Jane pushed him away. “Ed! I think you should leave now!”

  “Come on, Jane sweetheart. We’ve waited long enough. We’re both adults. We both want each other.” Ed was spreading kisses all along her neck as he spoke.

  Jane couldn’t catch her breath. This was so wrong. “No. No, Ed.”

  “Come on, baby. We’re good together—“

  “The lady said ‘No.’” Jane turned to see Jason standing in the doorway.

  “You have the most obnoxious habit of turning up at the wrong time.” Ed quit kissing Jane but continued to hold her.

  “Take your hands off the lady.” The steel in his voice matched the hardness in his eyes. Jane shook at the intensity of it.

  “Jane, could you tell this joker to get lost?” Ed turned back to his task of kissing Jane. Jane saw Jason start to move towards them.

  “Ed. Go home. Now.” She pushed him away from her.

  Catching the tone in Jane’s voice and the look in Jason’s eyes he decided that perhaps he should go home.

  Now.

  Ed walked to the door and before leaving said to Jane, “I’ll stop by and see you tomorrow, honey.”

  Jane locked the door and slowly turned around. The look on Jason’s face told her everything. He was tired. Obviously, the meeting hadn’t gone well. He was furious at finding Ed in the apartment kissing Jane. Since they were kids Jane had seen Jason angry many times but never with this intensity.

  The silence was suffocating. All Jane could hear was the heavy and frustrated breathing of the man pacing across the room from her. “Say something,” Jane quietly implored.

  Jason stopped and looked at her. “Say something? What could I possibly say?” He laughed humorlessly. “It’s been one hell of a day. The biggest deal of my life is going down in flames, your office is broken into, probably because of something I’ve gotten you involved in, and I come home from a miserable meeting to find you necking with a . . a . . a lawyer. Tell me, Jane? What should I say?”

  The silence was deafening.

  “What was he doing here? Giving you a little comfort? Has this been going on all along?”

  Now Jane was enraged. “Wait just a minute. I’ve been very honest about Ed. I haven’t even seen him since that day you came by the office and he and I were going out to lunch.”

  “Yeah, I’ll just bet.”

  “Jason! He just came over to see if I was all right after he heard my office had been broken into. He had a drink and got a little careless. That’s all!”

  Quietly, trying to contain the fury churning within, Jason said, “I guess my question is why did you let him in to begin with?”

  Not waiting for an answer, Jason walked into the bedroom and changed into workout clothes. Jane stood still not knowing how to deal with the situation. Jason soon came out with a gym bag in his hand.

  Focusing on the bag Jane asked, “Where are you going?” She hated that her voice trembled.

  “I’ve got to let off some steam. I’m going to my place to work out.” Putting on a light jacket he said, “Don’t let anyone in, okay? I’ll see you tomorrow.” And then he was gone.

  Jane was still frozen in the same spot. What just happened here? Jason was gone. She started shaking and the tears started falling. How could things go so wrong so fast? She took the cup of tea and empty glass of whiskey to the sink and turned out all the lights, sobbing the whole time.

  Curling up in bed, Jane brought a pillow to hug to her chest. The tears would not stop coming. The thought hit her hard that she had done what she had promised herself she would not do. She had given Jason the power to hurt her. Again.

  She wanted to be angry. She should be angry. She hadn’t done anything wrong. It wasn’t her fault that the situation with Ed had gotten out of hand. What was up with that? Ed usually didn’t act that way.

  She couldn’t be angry. All she wanted was to have Jason there, holding her tightly. Instead he had gone to his apartment. He was gone. Jane felt foolish for having believed again.

  The thought hit her as sharp as a punch to the stomach—he didn’t trust her. That was no way for a relationship to be. Trust was an absolute ingredient.

  But did she trust him? She still had not talked to him about their past. She was afraid. After tonight, she had to think that Jason might feel betrayed by what happened seven, no about six years ago. She couldn’t stand the thought of losing him again. No matter what she tried to convince herself, she knew that she would always love him. He was part of her very soul. She was lost and incomplete without him. Now he was gone. She cried until there were no more tears left.

  Exhausted, she fell asleep.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Jane awoke with a start. A glance at the clock told her it was just after three in the morning. Afraid that sleep would elude her for the rest of the night, she turned to her nightstand for something she could read. Perhaps more of the novel she had been reading. No, the last thing she wanted to do was to read romance—especially with being alone at three o’clock in the morning.

  She sighed heavily and rolled over. The l
arge quilt that bunched into a mound next to her in bed reminded her of Jason. Jane swallowed hard as she was reminded of how they had parted that evening. She wanted so much to have him back beside her. Gently she reached over to touch the quilt.

  It moved. A head popped out. Lifting his head, Jason looked up, his big brown eyes studying her. “Are you all right?” Jane was dumbfounded. Apparently she still had a few tears left in her eyes because they began to fall.

  “Baby, come here.” Jason pulled her into his arms. His touch was firm yet tender. Totally loving.

  Between sobs Jane just said his name. Jason nestled his head against hers. When she could finally speak she said, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let Ed in but he said he really needed to speak to me. He was kissing me before I had a chance to react. We weren’t necking. I wouldn’t do that to you.” The words came out fast as she continued crying.

  Jason cradled her face in one hand and kissed her gently. He calmed her down the best way he knew how, by saying three little words—

  “I love you.”

  Jason had been able to convince the Japanese contingent of distributors to keep the scheduled meeting in New York and see CARL in action. This threw both the Patterson Agency and the Talbot Toy Company into overdrive. They had two weeks to work out all the problems with the marketing campaign and the product demonstration.

  Jane and Jason were so busy with work that they hardly saw each other. Each had more work than a team of people could handle. Jane made sure that all marketing information on CARL was locked in the company safe. She was working early mornings and late into the evening to make sure this presentation was perfect.

  Jason stayed overnight at the office working on CARL. If he was lucky, he could jot off one or two text messages a day to Jane. The messages were always short—“I miss you,” “I love you,” “Have a gr8 day.” Jane’s messages were even shorter—“xxoo,” “”, “swak.”

  Finally, Jane thought enough was enough. She decided to actually have a lunch break and take sandwiches over to Jason’s office. She smiled to herself as she carried the sacks of food to the Talbot Toy Company Building.

  Jason was in the middle of an intense conversation with his designers about a flaw in CARL’s memory chip. Shelly buzzed Jason’s office to let him know that he had a visitor.

  “Shelly, I can’t see anyone right now.”

  “She said it was urgent and would only take a few minutes.”

  “She? Who is it?” Jason asked absently as he continued to toy with CARL.

  “It’s Dana Pleshette,” Shelly said quietly into the phone.

  Jason sighed. This was as good a time as any to tell Dana that he couldn’t see her anymore. “All right, for just a few minutes.” He gave the designers instructions and sent them out. Straightening his tie and putting on his jacket, he opened the door for Dana.

  “Jason, darling. It’s so good to see you.” Dana kissed him hard on the lips.

  Stunned but quickly recovering, Jason gently took her arms and eased her away from him. “So, what is so urgent?”

  “I was in town and thought we could get together.”

  Jason was irritated. “That’s what’s urgent? You wanted to go out? Dana, I’m right in the middle of a large project that has all my time and energy. In fact, I need to get back to it now. Besides, you need to know—”

  “Oh, yes. It’s CARL, isn’t it? I’ve been hearing the rumors of this special little guy.” Seeing a prototype in the corner, Dana walked to it and giggled. Bending over to look more intently at it, she purposely gave Jason a view of her stunning derriere. She turned to Jason, “Show me how it works, please, Jase?”

  Frustrated, Jason answered, “Five minutes, all right? Then we need to have a little talk and I need to get back to work.”

  Like a little girl, Dana clapped her hands and watched as Jason put a chip into CARL to start him up. Dana listened intently as Jason demonstrated the features of the toy. Her hands rested on Jason’s shoulders as he explained. Following the lesson, Jason stood to escort Dana over to the couch to talk to her. However, she didn’t want to talk.

  Dana stepped close to Jason backing him up against the wall. Her hands began to stretch over his chest as she tried to coax a response from him. “Jason, I’ve thought about you so much lately. It seems I can’t get you out of my mind. Are you sure you can’t take a little time away from the office with me?” Her hands began to explore his body as Jason tried to gently ease her away.

  “Dana, I’m flattered, I really am. But I’m . . .not available anymore. You see, Jane and I are . . . involved. We’re seeing each other and I—”

  But Dana was not so easily dismissed as her hands continued to probe. “Oh come on, Jason. She’s not half the woman you need.” She kissed his neck. “But I am.” She kissed his ear. “If you won’t go somewhere with me, I suppose we’ll just have to do it here in your office.” And then with strength Jason had no idea that she possessed, she pressed her body intimately against Jason’s, sliding her hands down to the zipper of his pants, all the while covering his face with kisses.

  Jason tried to stop her but she seemed to be everywhere at once. This was bad he thought. He didn’t know how bad until he looked up to see Shelly and Jane standing in the doorway. Jane was holding two bags of food from a nearby deli.

  With superhuman strength, Jason pushed Dana away from him, rushing to the door. Jane was already walking down the hall. “Janie, wait.” Jason caught her before she got to the elevator. “Janie, you got to believe me. Nothing was happening in there.”

  Jane looked at him and said, “Yeah, I got a look at ‘nothing’.”

  He grabbed her arm. “Listen, Dana just showed up. I thought now would be a good time to tell her about us, which I was trying to do when she ambushed me. Kind of like Ed did to you the other night, remember?”

  Jane thought about this for a moment. She had been totally innocent. Could she trust him that he was also totally innocent? As she considered this, Jason smiled at her, and her heart melted. She loved that smile. Smiling back she said, “I guess I could understand your dilemma.”

  “Are those bags filled with food? I’m starved,” Jason said.

  “I thought you deserved a decent lunch. CARL isn’t the only one to remind you it’s time to eat.” Jane reached up to kiss Jason but was interrupted by the sultry voice of Dana.

  “There you are, Jason. Are you ready to go?”

  “Jason’s having lunch with me,” Jane said firmly.

  Dana looked at Jason and then said, “Well, maybe some other time. Ciao.” And stroking his cheek with her long slender finger, she left.

  “Honestly, Jay. I thought you had better taste than that.”

  “I do,” Jason simply said as he took the bags of food into his office.

  Jane smiled. “You know, I really miss you. How’s everything going on your end of the project?”

  “It’s coming along,” Jason answered as he ravenously consumed his sandwich.

  Jane looked at him with concern in her eyes. “You’re not eating, are you?”

  “Probably just as much as you are,” Jason returned.

  “Then I’m really worried about you,” Jane said taking a bite of her sandwich.

  Their lunch was interrupted no less than four times with various department heads ascending on Jason with questions from budgeting to tech to design. The strain was all too evident in Jason’s eyes. Jane wanted to ease the tension but wasn’t quite sure how. Then an idea dawned on her.

  “Jay?”

  “Mm?” Jason was cramming food into his mouth like a zealot breaking a long fast.

  “I was thinking. We’re both working extremely hard right now. Tensions are high, nerves are raw.”

  “Uh-huh.” Jason kept eating.

  “The meeting is in about ten days, right?”

  “That’s right.”

  “I think we deserve a weekend away. Not after the meeting, but right now,” Jane said with comple
te conviction.

  Jason looked up confused. “Janie, I can’t go away before this meeting. There is too much to do.”

  Jane placed her hand on his. “Jay, listen. You’ve been working night and day on CARL. You have the best people on the planet working for you. Things are only going to get busier after the Japanese delegation fall in love with CARL next week.” Jay smiled at her optimism.

  Jane leaned her head closer to Jason. “Jay, you need to get away, just for a couple of days. You need to rest and recharge so that you’ll be your best for this presentation.” Jay contemplated what Jane was saying. “Two days, Jay, that’s all. Then we’ll come back and be the best that’s ever been.”

  Jay took Jane’s hands into his. Looking into her beautiful clear blue eyes, he said, “Where would you like to go?”

  Without a moment’s hesitation she replied, “The beach!”

  The waves joyously crashed along the shore in time to the music of the ocean, wild and unrestrained. The blue sky seemed to join in the happy mood with its bright color, dotted with a few puffy white clouds. Running footsteps made prints on the soft sand, quickly erased by the jumping tide. The sound of laughter competed with the sound of the surf.

  They looked like teenage sweethearts as they ran along the beach. He was chasing her with a laugh loud and long. She was yelling, feigning protest but actually in delight, giggling all the way. Finally catching her, he swung her close to him and held her. As they stood barefoot, in old jeans and sweatshirts, he kissed her with a tenderness that had her shaking. Slowly, he released her. Without a word, he took her hand and led her to his beach house. Their beach house, he thought with complete satisfaction. This was like a dream too glorious to be real—making love to Jane, his wife, in their beach house.